Welcome to The Sugar Quill

A/N: I started writing this after eating at least 4 oz. of sharp cheddar cheese with Triscuits. I don’t know if that has anything to do with anything, but I felt the need to share. I love cheese. Basically I’ve had these Minutes written for quite a while now, but I just haven’t had the time to put them on paper. The second half was written after Chinese food, three beers (well, I’m on #3 right now, and a few episodes of Absolutely Fabulous. The suspense is killing you, isn’t it?) I’m listening to the SQ Shipper Soundtrack. You can’t fight this feeling anymore can you? You’re hanging by a moment aren’t you? Heh. Am I leaving you breathless? Heh.

So, with plenty further ado, here are a few words of wisdom from Pats to start us off…

"Darling, if you want to talk bullocks and discover the meaning of life, you’re better off downing a bottle of whiskey. At least that way you’re unconscious before you start to take yourself seriously."
~Patsy Stone, Fashion Editor, Alcoholic, Friend

*~*~*~*

"Do you feel like you’re forgetting something?"

"Forgetting what?"

"I don’t know."

"Well, how do you know if your forgetting something if you can’t remember what it is that you’ve forgot?"

"What?"

"Huh?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I don’t know. I forget."

*****

"Where’s Arabella?" Zsenya looked around the room as if waiting for her to Apparate even though she knows you cannot Apparate into SQHQ. For the love! I mean, she’s the one that put the order through.

"Are the toilets working?" asked Moey, looking confused.

"Why wouldn’t they be?" B replied.

"I don’t know," Moey said looking even more confused. "I thought you would be able to tell me."

"What’s up with you?" Elanor asked.

"I don’t know."

"I think it’s those dolls," the Elanor replied. "They are really throwing me off. Can’t we get rid of them?"

"We need to have them for training." Zsenya began to place them in obnoxious poses. How is the SQ Search & Rescue supposed to be efficient if we don’t have realistic training exercises?"

They all stared at the Harry and Hermione dolls as B positioned them under a sign that read, Ron Weasley, the Best Sidekick a Super Wizard Ever Had.

"Harryyyyyyyyy! Is that your , Harryyyyyyyyy?" B said in a sickening, singsong voice. "Harryyyyyyy! Are you experiencing , Harryyyyyyyyy?"

"That is just sick. SICK!" Elanor Gamgee AKA Cap’n Kathy had recently taken herself out of the field. She was burnt out and was currently doing paperwork for the SQ.

"You’re just not out there anymore. You aren’t used to it." B replied.

"And I’m that much better for it. I’m telling you, you should try it! It’s fantastic."

"But then who would save them?" Moey asked.

"Point taken," Elanor replied. "But I’m telling you, sometimes I don’t see the point."

"They are INNOCENTS!" Moey exclaimed. "How can you say that? You’re the Cap’n!"

But she didn’t have a chance to reply. Just then Arabella’s face appeared in the fireplace. "Guys!"

"Arabella! Where are you? Why aren’t you here?" Zsenya ran toward the fireplace.

"I don’t know. Some undisclosed location. I was supposed to catch the Knight Bus but it’s behind schedule or something." Then she added, annoyed, "I would Apparate, except that someone decided not to allow it."
Zsenya was not fazed. "Well, do you have any Floo Powder on you?"

"Um, Zsenya?" Moey interrupted. "You had me take HQ off of the Floo Powder Travel Network."

"I did? I don’t remember?" Zsenya looked puzzled. "When did I do that? Why did I do that?"

"A few weeks ago, I think. And I don’t remember why."

"Why can’t anyone remember anything?" Zsenya asked. "Arabella, you have to stop making the drinks so strong." The face in the fireplace was caught mid sip.

Arabella gulped, "Um, yeah. Sure."

"Why didn’t you bring your broom?" B asked.

"I don’t know. I don’t remember anything! Someone come and get me, please!" The rest of the gals were throwing on their cloaks and about to leave when Arabella’s head appeared once more.

"Never mind. The bus just showed up! I’ll be there soon!"

"Tell Ern we said hi."

****

Later that evening, after Arabella had arrived at HQ and had settled back in, the gals chatted and read and basically made .

The gals went to bed, still feeling as though they had left an unattended cauldron on the fire.

****

They awoke to a bright and sunshiny day. The air was warm and the gals decided to get out for once and enjoy the sunshine. However, not without first applying plenty of sunscreen. All those hours spent in SQHQ haven’t exactly promoted savage tans. Their snow white complexions need protection.

With the Good Ship R/H anchored just off the coast, the ladies took a swim in the murky waters of the Atlantic. Much like the fandom waters, there is often trash found floating about, but luck was with them on this fine day and the waters were clean and clear. In both the Atlantic and the fandom. ()

The gals frolicked and romped in the surf with the exception of Cap’n Kathy. It seems that Cap’n Kathy does not like the water. This is a classic example of what is called irony. It is very ironic that the Cap’n doesn’t like water. Rain on your wedding day is not ironic. Nor is the fact that Hermione kisses Harry at the end of Goblet of Fire. That’s just friendship. If anyone has any questions about irony, the myth called subtext, or any other literary terms, please contact a professor at the Sugar Quill at sugarquill@sugarquill.net, thank you.

So again, there was frolicking and romping done by Moey, B, Arabella, and Zsenya…

The surf started getting rough. The SQ Gals were tossed. B lost her glasses.

"My glasses are gone!" she exclaimed. Arabella immediately dove beneath the water to look for them. But, alas, they were gone forever.

"Damn!" B exclaimed. "They were expensive. Not to mention magical. I could see through things."

"Yeah, we all know what you were using those things for," Zsenya remarked.

"Well," B answered, matter of factly, "someone has to check up on all this potential boner shame we keep hearing about. I mean, it seems to be an epidemic. I’m doing research!"

"Yeah, research," Arabella sniggered.

Moey, Arabella, and B decided to take a walk along the beach. It seemed like a lovely idea and it was; the air was warm, there was a lovely breeze, and there was the added benefit of many, many Weasleys on the beach. Ron was there, looking particularly good.

"I wish I had my glasses," B muttered.

****

"It’s all about the gentle release of the meat."

"What?"

"I’m talking about the crabs."

"That doesn’t make it sound any better. But for a minute there I thought I was in a bad H/H fic."

"Does anyone else still feel as thought they are forgetting something?"

"I don’t know. Yeah."

"I think so."

"Look at that one. He’s dancing."

"Arabella stop playing with your food."

"Just eat him."

"Pass the beer."

****

After dinner the gals gathered back at HQ for drinks and the official viewing of The Montage.

The Montage had been talked about for what seemed like years, and had until this moment been the stuff of legends. But now the gals were going to view it. To see the infamous Eric immortalize Harry to the 80’s sensation Tina Turner and her smash hit, Simply the Best. It was monumental, astronomical! We laughed, we cried, we drank more R/H’s. It was a joyous event. Never to be duplicated.

"Can’t you see it?"

Yes, Eric, we can see it. Thank you, Eric. Thank you.

****

The prototypes of the Official SQ Gals Trading Cards were viewed. They are going to be the next big sensation in the fandom. And the fact that we all have big giant breasts will definitely attract the boys. We need more boys, especially since .

"Look at Arabella’s queen hat," Moey said as she looked at Arabella’s trading card picture.

"You mean crown?" Arabella asked, choking back her laughter.

"Yeah, didn’t I say that?" Moey asked confused.

"You said queen hat."

"It’s as if I couldn’t remember the word," Moey said. "What is up with that?"

"Arabella, stop making the drinks so strong!" Zsenya ordered. "It’s as if everyone here has been the victim of a bad Memory Charm!"

"What are you talking about?" B asked.

"Yeah," the Cap’n added.

"I don’t know," Zsenya replied. "I can’t remember."

However, they did remember how much Mariah Carey SUX. Meg even entertained the masses with her impression of the squealing freax.

And then there was the dancing…

Zsenya gave a masterful performance. Madonna was played. Clothes were removed, and Remus/Sirius wolf-children were born. Well they would be born if certain people would finish what they started. But we won’t go there right now.

The frolicking and romping went on late into the night, and Arabella and Moey were once again the last two left awake.

"We are always the ones that have to lock up!" Arabella complained.

"Yeah, for all the security, you would think Zsenya would invest in some security trolls. Especially with what happened."

"What happened?" Arabella asked Moey.

"I don’t know. But didn’t something happen?"

"I think so but I can’t remember," Arabella said as she shrugged.

****

The next day was spent with more frolicking and romping outside. But Zsenya seemed uneasy.

"We need to go back."

"Why?" Cap’n Kathy asked. "What’s the matter?"

"I just think we should go home," Zsenya was adamant.

"Come off it Zsenya," Arabella said, "everything is KEWL back at HQ. Stop worrying."

So after spending much of the day away from SQHQ, the gals finally made their way home. Arabella and Moey had separated from the rest of the group, running into Harry. Cap’n Kathy, B, and Zsenya were together. Everything seemed fine.

But somewhere else, something was amiss.

And the gals were starting to remember what it was they had forgotten…

What is amiss? What have the girls forgotten? And what happened when Moey and Arabella ran into Harry? These and other questions will be answered whenever I feel like writing more Minutes. Mwahahahahahahaha!

The Sugar Quill was created by Zsenya and Arabella. For questions, please send us an Owl!