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Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 28

Reviewer: CarmenDate: 2004-06-25
Reviewid: 88823Chapter: 6
Wow. This is possibly THE best piece of fanfiction work I've ever read -- and it tops a whole lot of oringinal books that have been published. The way you write is absolutely fantastic.

Reviewer: TournesolDate: 2003-08-10
Reviewid: 46510Chapter: 6
This story was absolutely fascinating.
Your writing style and technique are both excellent.
The plot was original, but what I appreciated the most was that you settled everything with great detail, you took the time to describe precisely the character's attitude and to make the reader know their feelings.
I think you are among the most talented authors I've had the occasion to read fanfics of on the web.
Thanks for that story.

Reviewer: DrWormDate: 2003-08-02
Reviewid: 45048Chapter: 6
I'm not a regular visitor to this site, and I am only here now, writing this review, because I made a sort of off-handed remark about Remus/Percy and someone directed me here.
That being said, I have only one thing to tell you: occasionally I come across fanfiction that is as good as the novels themselves are. I like them. I may leave a comment. But I can count on one hand the number of fics I have read that have far surpassed the novels and given true depth and adult emotion to the characters portrayed, made them into human beings. Yours is one of those fics. I am left feeling as if I've been kicked in the chest and had my brain picked down to the core. Truly one of my favorite feelings when reading. I salute you wholeheartedly.

Reviewer: Insanity70Date: 2003-05-18
Reviewid: 32546Chapter: 6
Wow. I loved this last chapter. "breaking yourself, not the curse" - incredible idea! Any your OCs are very real.
Then I have read other people's reviews and had to go back to the fic to see if Allgreenthumb had a valid point. Well, may be, but what is really weird it that I did NOT find anything here to be offensive - it is really weird because I can't read slash and I am usually most put out by the typical S/R stuff, no matter how much I try to force myself to be "open-minded" and read it ... So either this is not really slash, or Calanthe is extremely good... ??
Uh, well, one thing is clear - this fic is really different and I am glad you endured and made it throught to the end!

Reviewer: KimagureDate: 2003-05-17
Reviewid: 32470Chapter: 6
*blinks in awe* Wow...just *wow*! I wish I could say something more insightful, but I'm kind of completely floored here by this. I love the way you've characterized the two of them, Percy especially. He's pompous, but it's a bit of a cover to hide other things, and I love how you showed that he deliberately used his attitude to keep people at a distance and push them even farther away. And man...*whistles*

>>Self-loathing concentrated to the point where it becomes magic. You didn’t break the Curse, Percy, you broke yourself and left it nothing to hold to.’<<

*winces* Ouch. That was an amazing bit of dialogue and a nice twist.

And I loved the way that Remus reacted to Percy's small advance there. That seemed so in character for him. I also loved Percy's reaction to his reaction. Gyah...

Damn, you rock. ^-^

Reviewer: Jenny S.Date: 2003-05-16
Reviewid: 32367Chapter: 6
Beautiful ending:) If I may make a request, I'd love to see a sequel, where Percy reunites with his family:)

Reviewer: AllgreenthumbsDate: 2003-05-16
Reviewid: 32330Chapter: 6
Your writing shows much skill, though it is confusing at times. It is considered standard procedure and common courtesy to say at the outset if a story contains slash or even implied slash. I and others find it offensive and do not appreciate reading it.

Reviewer: kazzaDate: 2003-05-16
Reviewid: 32300Chapter: 6
What an ending!
Remus and Percy balance each other so well, both outcasts of others making. I can imagine them staying close for years and giving each other the strength to continue on and overcome their obstacles; especially now they have a common goal.

Thank you for finishing the story.

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-05-16
Reviewid: 32260Chapter: 6
A lovely conclusion! (Is there any chance of a sequel?) Poor Remus. Poor Percy. They've endured so much suffering. Your description of Remus's physical pain was powerful enough to make me ache.

And this part was really heart-breaking:

‘Fastidium ipsius,’ said Remus again, and watched as the words unravelled in Percy’s mind and his face drained white. ‘It’s a form of wandless magic, directed inwards instead of out. Self-loathing concentrated to the point where it becomes magic. You didn’t break the Curse, Percy, you broke yourself and left it nothing to hold to.’ The words clotted his mouth like ash. ‘You were lucky to survive.’

It was quite satisfying to see Lackey hauled off by Madam Warden (a delightful person, and the interaction between her and Minerva was brilliant)but Percy still has quite a lot of aftermath to deal with.

Thank you for showing that his spirit endures. He still reaches out. He still has the strength to care. He still is so endearingly proud of the fact that he can Apparate. (Hugs Percy!)

(I'd hug Remus too, but he's in too much pain and it's better not to wake him.)

Thank you for writing this story and sharing it with us!

Reviewer: PortiaDate: 2003-05-16
Reviewid: 32259Chapter: 6
The relationship between Remus and Percy, slashy or not, makes perfect sense. I have never seen a friendship between those two characters written before, and you did it very well.

I especially like Remus-the-Interrogator: it fits an aspect of his character that is so often neglected. He has the power of inspiring trust, and that makes him dangerous and effective.

I am liking your Minerva more and more. You have shown her character very well.

I disagreed with much of your portrayal of Percy's turning, although it was written beautifully.

<<but I’m only s-stupid Percy, I’m not perfect, I’m not Ron—’ >>That doesn't make sense to me. I never got the sense that the Weasleys were any prouder of Ron than of Percy--quite the opposite, in fact, especially considering Ron's many accomplishments. It seemed to me that the Weasleys as a whole lionized Percy and ignored Ron and condescended to Ginny, which is why Ron resented Percy. The twins were venomous to Percy, of course, but they are indifferent to Ron, so I don't get the Ron-jealousy at all.

Speaking of the twins, I'm glad you brought up the fact that they routinely humiliated and hurt Percy without censure. I do wish, however, that you'd gone into how Percy may have brought some of this fate upon himself. Maybe if you have room in later chapters you could go into how Percy's own personality reacted with the twins's and the rest of the Weasleys to produce this tragedy--it would make Percy a more convincing tragic hero.

I liked the contrast between Remus's calm and Percy's anger as well.

Reviewer: Cassandra Leigh HansonDate: 2003-04-16
Reviewid: 28115Chapter: 5

Reviewer: kazzaDate: 2003-04-12
Reviewid: 27650Chapter: 5
This is a wonderful story. I really like the parallels of the two self-imposed outcast characters

Reviewer: The White LilyDate: 2003-04-12
Reviewid: 27649Chapter: 5
Wow. I've just read all five chapters here, and all I can say is wow. This is a beautiful, intricate, evocative story. Your writing style is very poiginant and detailed, drawing the reader into the story in a way I've seldom seen. Well done.

I feel so deeply for all the characters. Percy is so brave and so strong! Even though he couldn't fight the curse, he made his family send him away. It must have torn him apart. I hope that his family can finally understand why he did what he did. You have really made me feel for Percy, with the way his brothers humiliate him. It's always portrayed in the books as it being his own stuffiness, but he must be so hurt by the way they treat him.

I hope you continue this soon, I have really enjoyed reading this.

Reviewer: Jenny S.Date: 2003-04-12
Reviewid: 27630Chapter: 5
Woderful:) But you're teasing me! I want to see the chapter where Percy confronts his evil boss! hehe. But great chapter anyway:)

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-04-12
Reviewid: 27626Chapter: 5
As always, the atmoshere that you weave with your words is superb. Remus's heightened senses and the toll that his approaching change are taking on him are very much in evidence.

One of my favorite things about this chapter was seeing Remus and Percy being on more of an equal footing, even though they're both frightened. Percy's being the stronger one, reassuring Remus that he would be all right, was very poignant.

Your description of the physical effects of the change on Remus made my muscles ache as I read it. Poor Remus.

I'm frantic to know what's going to happen next & can't wait for the next chapter!

Reviewer: LorraineDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27235Chapter: 4
You've really captured my imagination with this piece. I love the way you write; I can smell, hear and see everything the characters are. I love the whole idea of this story, and your characterisation is wonderful. I hope to see more of this soon.

Thank you,


Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-03-24
Reviewid: 25095Chapter: 4
GOD! Poor Percy. Poor Fred and George! Up to a point, I do agree with what Remus said. Poor Percy has learned that it's all right for his brothers to humiliate him. Years of humiliation. He's been taught that it's HIS problem. HE'S supposedly the one who's at fault for not having a sense of humor. As much as I sometimes enjoy the antics of Fred and George, I don't agree that Percy should have had to just live with being humiliated. Percy's dignity SHOULD have been protected and defended. His family did do wrong by him.

On the other hand, Percy is right too. There's no comparision between the degree of Fred and George's crimes with those committed by Lackey. I ached for Percy, especially when he defended his brothers and his family. He trusted Lackey, and Lackey abused his trust in every possible way.

The following point is utterly brilliant, when Remus says "I told you I needed a sure proof that your story was the truth. Well, this was it. The only possible—incontrovertible—proof that when you gave your oath to Lord Voldemort you were not acting of your own will.’" WOW! This is so elegant... a way to prove that anyone whose Dark Mark endures is in Voldemort's service of his or her own free will!

Once again, your descriptions of both Remus and Percy were lovely and poignant. I especially love the way that you describe the light as it moves over them. Beautiful!

This story is so intense. I can't wait for the next chapter!

Reviewer: Jenny S.Date: 2003-03-24
Reviewid: 25062Chapter: 4
Please hurry and continue! It's really good!

Reviewer: AmandaDate: 2003-03-05
Reviewid: 22775Chapter: 3
These last two chapters are just as good as the first. I'm really looking forward to the next part! I like your concept, and I like your writing -- I like this piece! Please, continue!

Reviewer: JennyDate: 2003-03-04
Reviewid: 22633Chapter: 1
This is a very interesting and original story. I think that you shouldn't use so many pronouns- 'he' instead of someone's name. At times in III, I had trouble understanding whether it was Lupin or Percy doing something.

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-03-04
Reviewid: 22619Chapter: 3
Another chapter, so quickly!! Very well written and so heart-breaking. Poor brave Percy... fighting so hard, cutting himself off from his family so he won't be able to betray them. That had me all teary eyed. It's especially wrenching to hear Percy say "I'm not perfect," when Ron used to call him Perfect Percy.

Morton Lackey is playing a dangerous game. I sincerely hope that he gets caught.

You write a perfect Remus. Calm, steady, with an aura of controlled power that is awesome. The conversations between Remus and Percy are magnificent. I especially enjoyed the one about anger, when Remus said that he didn't like to hand others a weapon to use against him.

The inquiry is on the day of a full moon? Uh oh...

I can't wait for the next chapter!

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-03-01
Reviewid: 22297Chapter: 2
It's so wonderful to see a new chapter! You write the most wonderful descriptions of Percy, Remus and Minerva. Their expressions, the way that the light moves over them, their emotions, the way that they touch each other. The emotions in this chapter are powerful. Minerva and Remus care for Percy and want very much to save him. I loved how Remus looked after Percy and helped him clean himself up. And I also loved how Percy tried to talk his way out of trouble. Lupin's role as "watchdog" makes a lot of sense. Poor Percy, blamed for what happened to Mr. Crouch? That's unfair, but it could happen. Poor Percy again, a person named "Lackey" doesn't sound very trustworthy.

I hope that you'll write more soon!

Reviewer: AmandaDate: 2003-02-23
Reviewid: 21545Chapter: 1
I'm really interested to see where this is going! I hope Percy's just working undercover or... something, but that's just because I'm in love with him. I really look forward to the next part... I hope there'll be a next part!

Reviewer: AmandaDate: 2003-01-28
Reviewid: 18099Chapter: 1
This is interesting. Do you intend to continue it soon, if at all?

Reviewer: CalantheDate: 2002-11-09
Reviewid: 8516Chapter: 1
Hi all,

Thank you for such lovely kind reviews! I'm very very flattered by your comments. Barbara, I hope the chapter lived up to your expectations, and I'm very glad you enjoyed *Under Siege* as well. And Ozma, you're right, there is more going on than meets the eye...I'm afraid I'm a slow writer, but chapter two is with my beta now and I'm working on chapter three, so you won't be kept waiting *too* long for the next installment, Elphaba!

If you were wondering about the strange numbering arrangement: there is a Vignettes 2, titled *Of the Causes of Magic*. I've drafted it, but haven't edited yet. And there will be more stories to follow this one--I have a whole series planned.

Again, thanks for your feedback. You've given my confidence in my writing a real boost.

I tried to send people PMs, but the messges wouldn't go through...

Reviewer: ElphabaDate: 2002-11-03
Reviewid: 8033Chapter: 1
I love the attention to detail in this story. And when Remus uncovered the Deatheater mark on Percy's arm, my stomach really did drop. You did a nice job building suspense and momentum in a short space. I want to know what happens next!

Reviewer: Barbara MillerDate: 2002-11-03
Reviewid: 7987Chapter: 1
I am so thrilled to find another Vignette! I have not read it yet, but I just wanted to tell you that I am glad you have written another. Vignette #1 was very powerfully written and evocative. I cannot wait to start reading this one.

Sincerely, Barbara

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2002-11-03
Reviewid: 7973Chapter: 1
Percy, a Death Eater? Oh, dear! I'm sure that there's more going on than meets the eye. Can't wait to see where you're going with this... I want to see Gryffindor Percy in action too.

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