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Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Ashes, Ashes
Review(s): 84

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-02-13
Reviewid: 139763Chapter: 1
A sad , yet excellently done piece.

Reviewer: AzaeliaDate: 2005-10-29
Reviewid: 135342Chapter: 1
I was just browsing through the archive, in search of something I hadn't read before and this story caught my eye. I love it; chilling, haunting...It puts me in mind of my horror at realizing what that song "ring around the rosie" that I used to dance to in a circle of friends actually meant. There are a lot of now-meaningless songs that go along with kids' games that are really very dark.

Excellent observation, and I loved the song, too. I can really picture the game in my mind, going along to the words...Somehow it reduces Voldemort to a monster-under-the-bed level, like he'll get you if you don't eat your vegetables. I was amazed at the fact that it only took a couple generations for the true meaning to go out of the song...it shows how quickly we choose to forget the darker things in the past.

Excellent job, very chilling.
~Azaelia

Reviewer: MollyDate: 2005-10-09
Reviewid: 134024Chapter: 1
I don't like Harry Potter fic. I rarely read it. Most of it gives me hives.
And this was absolutely bloody <i>brilliant</i>. Gave me chills. You are extremely talented.

Reviewer: katie janewayDate: 2005-10-01
Reviewid: 133510Chapter: 1
Wow...this was brilliant work. Insightful, really, since children's rhymes and games can sometimes be linked to tragic events of the past...

Reviewer: Gaia FayeDate: 2005-09-12
Reviewid: 132377Chapter: 1
Oh, wow. This is really creepy. Those simple children's rhymes are brilliant in how their playfulness is just disturbing. And it does make you think about how horrible things in the old days now contribute to games or humor. I feel for the narrator.

Great job!

Reviewer: FlyingskullDate: 2005-09-10
Reviewid: 132066Chapter: 1
Perfect. Absolutely real and perfect. I don't have to tell you what children sang after the Great Plague and the sinking of the Titanic. Am of a newer generation form Lagers and Vietnam, yet I feel the 'frisson', the shivers of it. Thanks for a great fic.

Reviewer: NerfherderDate: 2005-09-09
Reviewid: 132032Chapter: 1
That was absolutely stunning. You managed to give the reader goosebumps in just a few paragraphs worth of text. What joy if other writers could do the same. :)

Reviewer: Cat FeralDate: 2005-09-09
Reviewid: 132030Chapter: 1
This was intense and believable. I really liked it. I was left wondering who the narrator was? Could it be Minerva or is this after her time?

Reviewer: XedraDate: 2005-08-30
Reviewid: 131310Chapter: 1
Chills. I got chills at the very end!
That genuinely spooked me and it is very RARE for anythng I read to spook me.
Well done.

Reviewer: JessieDate: 2005-04-03
Reviewid: 118587Chapter: 1
That scared me. A lot.

There's something sickening about that, with the children singing...

It makes me feel petty to want to compliment you.

Reviewer: Reader2Date: 2005-03-16
Reviewid: 116724Chapter: 1
Excellent fic, poor minerva

Reviewer: SaeasDate: 2004-10-27
Reviewid: 102686Chapter: 1
Very clever. Just like 'Ring around the Roses'. I'm intrigued as to the identity of the speaker.

Reviewer: MelDate: 2004-08-15
Reviewid: 97350Chapter: 1
I LLLLLOOOOOVVVVVEEEEE the song!!!

Reviewer: Eliza M.Date: 2004-05-31
Reviewid: 85353Chapter: 1
This scared me like you wouldn't believe. I had to turn on the light on my desk and it's not even dark outside! Ring Around the Rosie is on my mind and it's odd really because I used to play ring around the rosie and it wasn't until third grade my sister told me it was about the plague and I remember being shocked beause it does seem very childish and all that.

"History becomes legend.
Terror becomes a game"

A great story. (oh man now I keep staring over my shoulder.)
P.S. Okay this just hit me, the Freddy something song from the slasher movies, this also reminds of that song.

Reviewer: story645Date: 2004-05-30
Reviewid: 85235Chapter: 1
Cool take on how tragedy often turns into childrens games, most obviously Ring around the Rosie (Didn't remember that name until I read the other reviews). I wonder who the woman is, but I like that you kept her anonymous.

Reviewer: NarumiDate: 2004-03-30
Reviewid: 76451Chapter: 1
Wow. Dark. I love it.

Reviewer: CornedBeeDate: 2004-03-03
Reviewid: 73021Chapter: 1
Morbid...

But good job on the verses.

Reviewer: ThrenDate: 2004-01-09
Reviewid: 66354Chapter: 1
I cannot believe that I haven't left a comment here yet. I love this fic so much. It's even helped me in a debate. *G*

This message is one too often forgotten. For every generation that passes, we're more likely to repeat the old mistakes. How long before those children have to face their own Dark Lord, and the cycle begins again?

I loved the progression of the chant (well done, by the by), and the terror that it invokes in someone who lived it. I particularly loved, as other people have mentioned, "History becomes legend. Terror becomes a game." It really makes me feel the big picture- our legend was someone else's present. *Their* legend was reality to someone even older. It almost boggles the mind.

Very well done. I really hope to see more from you at some point. Excellent work.

Reviewer: MnemosyneDate: 2004-01-09
Reviewid: 66312Chapter: 1
When I first read this, and I read the comments, I thought, WHAT about ring around the rosies? WHAT is it? WHAT DOES RING AROUND THE ROSIES MEAN??????????? (And by the way, I think they do still do itówe did it in pre-pre-school when I was two, but that was about a decade ago.) So I asked my friend, and it gave me the chills. That night, I had a dream where my friend kept scratching her arm, so much that eventually she was sent to the nurse. It was a bright red spot with a ring around it. Then the dream faded out, and there were voices chanting Ring Around the Rosies.

Reviewer: MnemosyneDate: 2004-01-09
Reviewid: 66311Chapter: 1
Wow....touching. Like ring-around-the-rosies, eh? Scary....
My heart freezes with this story. Who is it?

Reviewer: JennDate: 2003-12-28
Reviewid: 64968Chapter: 1
eep.

Reviewer: Susan LynnDate: 2003-12-16
Reviewid: 63574Chapter: 1
As you alluded to in your title, so many of our nursery rhymes refer back to horrifying events of human history. The words in your story that most struck me were "History becomes legend. Terror becomes a game." A chilling piece.

Reviewer: Miss Stephanie D.Date: 2003-12-11
Reviewid: 62982Chapter: 1
Such a simple, short story, yet it sends chills down my back just thinking about it. What a powerful and haunting rhyme.

Reviewer: AlDate: 2003-12-08
Reviewid: 62571Chapter: 1
Wonderful! And scary...

Reviewer: AbhyaDate: 2003-10-19
Reviewid: 57082Chapter: 1
Excellent story, although very chilling. Reminded me of the song "Ring Around the Rosies." Very well-written, but now I need to read a happy story to get me out of my trance.

Reviewer: Olivia FrostDate: 2003-10-03
Reviewid: 55287Chapter: 1
That was creepy! It was so wonderfully written and haunting. I heard about this story some place else and what it was about, but nothing prepared me for how brilliant and somewhat disterbing this is. Great work!

Reviewer: QueenieDate: 2003-08-05
Reviewid: 45637Chapter: 1
Haunting. Woah.

Reviewer: MaltaMuggleDate: 2003-07-18
Reviewid: 42746Chapter: 1
Haunting... and powerful. Brilliant

Reviewer: Eleanor RigbyDate: 2003-03-25
Reviewid: 25179Chapter: 1
I LUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUV this story! I read it AGES ago and then couldn't find it. NOW I HAVE IT HAHAHAHAHHA! I'm soo happy that I found it--and btw whose PoV is this? And also btw which verse is which? Is No.2 the new one or old one? Is No.1 the new one or the old one?

Reviewer: alchemillaDate: 2003-03-19
Reviewid: 24619Chapter: 1
Chilling!

Reviewer: MollyDate: 2003-03-14
Reviewid: 24009Chapter: 1
That was kind of creepy, but, sort of effective to make the reader feel for the kids. After all, for kids to make a song about it, must be really sort of scary...

Reviewer: StereoMDate: 2003-03-14
Reviewid: 23902Chapter: 1
Wow. That was really powerful and scary. Gave me shivers. The verses are really well done, and.. wah. Wah! Heh.

Wonderful. :)

Reviewer: Insanity70Date: 2003-03-13
Reviewid: 23809Chapter: 1
Goodness... how did I miss that before? Wars and horrors of prior generations become games for new generation ... So life...
Someone commented that she (McGonagall) was upset/dishartened at the end - but can't you cry of joy, or rather both joy that it is really, really over, sadness for those wo died, and perhaps for those who gave their best years to fighting, and may be also from wanting these kids to understand what their really means, all the sufering and sacrifice behind it. Oh, I think I might be reading something into your story. I played WW1 and WW1 growing up - a lot. And both of my grandfathers were killed in WW2.

Reviewer: SuvielDate: 2003-03-11
Reviewid: 23626Chapter: 1
Wow. This was brilliant, it made me shiver...

Reviewer: StarzblueDate: 2003-03-05
Reviewid: 22777Chapter: 1
This story is really good. It gave me shivers!

Reviewer: kayjalDate: 2003-02-23
Reviewid: 21536Chapter: 1
wow this is..this is really really good
the verse..
A Death Eaterís coming, heís opening the door.
Your friends and your family wonít see you anymore.

and this one...
The Dark Markís appearing, of that there is no doubt.
VOLDEMORT will get you if you
Donít.
Watch.
OUT!

Reviewer: saraDate: 2003-02-21
Reviewid: 21397Chapter: 1
scary

Reviewer: Livia LianaDate: 2003-02-21
Reviewid: 21385Chapter: 1
That was terribly well-written, powerful, and beautiful. The rhymes are drawn wonderfully - they really work.

This is always an interesting situation to explore. We cannot live in fear forever, but we also cannot forget the fear and terror for worry of it rising again, and catching us unprepared. It's a fine line between being ready and being paralyzed by fear, and you've done a good job showing that.

Reviewer: encorekidDate: 2003-02-19
Reviewid: 21053Chapter: 1
Wow, this is goood. This strangley reminds me of the episode in Buffy the Vampire Slayer when everone looses their voice, and the girl sings the " haunting" ryme. very good though!!!

Reviewer: Crookshanks913Date: 2003-01-29
Reviewid: 18304Chapter: 1
Moving, Freaky, and surprisingly realistic. I had to catch my breath after reading it.

Reviewer: SevenDate: 2003-01-28
Reviewid: 18158Chapter: 1
Ahhh! Creepy. The last paragraph of the song was creepy. But it's a very well written story. :]

Reviewer: alphabetDate: 2003-01-28
Reviewid: 18134Chapter: 1
Goodness. This is...wow. I don't quite know how to review. It's a great story. It packs quite an emotional punch. It's really well-written and it hits the reader hard. Amazing--great job.

Reviewer: MiwiDate: 2003-01-25
Reviewid: 17765Chapter: 1
What a nice concept! I like the way you made the new kids to don't care
about the past and treat everything as a big joke, and the way this brought
bad memories to the woman... who could be what, Hermione?
(I don't see it happening by the time of the books, because then there were
still a lot of people who feared Voldemort, since he had been defeated not
long ago.)
Liked it! Way to go! ^.^

Reviewer: AlchemineDate: 2003-01-10
Reviewid: 15800Chapter: 1
Utterly chilling! Children never truly understand what the older generation has endured to ensure their safety, do they? I thought the lines "History becomes legend. Terror becomes a game" summed that up especially well.
An excellent story!

Reviewer: LaurenDate: 2003-01-04
Reviewid: 15128Chapter: 1
That was pretty freaky, I mean, seriously, a game can really mean scary things... (oh, and my friend doesn't understand it!)

Reviewer: Radcliffes galDate: 2002-12-22
Reviewid: 13648Chapter: 1
I DIDN"T GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reviewer: ArleneDate: 2002-12-21
Reviewid: 13547Chapter: 1
I'm dumb. I read the story again and I noticed it says 'I am a very old woman.' I thought it was Dumbledore for some odd reason. So I think it's an old Hermione or a McGonagall.

~Arlene

Reviewer: Blue_Eyed_AthenaDate: 2002-12-21
Reviewid: 13532Chapter: 1
Oh! Wonderfully disturbing. I take it this was taken from the fact that "Ring around the Rosies" is about the Plaugue? That always disturbed me.

Who is the person whose PoV this is from? Hermione?

Reviewer: ArleneDate: 2002-12-21
Reviewid: 13531Chapter: 1
Creepy, but good. I want to know who that person is, I think it's Dumbledore...

Reviewer: DidiDate: 2002-12-21
Reviewid: 13527Chapter: 1
Wow. That. Was. Freaky. But in a good way! That was good!

Reviewer: Persephone_KoreDate: 2002-12-19
Reviewid: 13361Chapter: 1
*whistles*

Very good, very impressive.... very well done job on the song, with the rhythm (scansion is one of the easiest things for me to find disruptive, especially when it's something that's *supposed* to be rhythmic...) and the wording -- you convey a very realistic mix for such a rhyme of irreverence and exaggeration and playing with fear and the realism that would make someone who *did* live through it (or even just read the books...) shudder.

I like the progression, too. Not just in the attack -- approach on to the Dark Mark -- but in the third lines, the way they start off with You-Know-Who and end with the name so many used to be afraid to say.

Reviewer: Your SisterDate: 2002-12-18
Reviewid: 13293Chapter: 1
First: Seriously, you need to tell me when you post these things. Why don't you, eh, Noodles?

Second: I like your story. Nice rhymes; Lewis Carroll meets JK Rowling meets Mother Goose meets Death. Creepy.

Reviewer: rockyDate: 2002-12-17
Reviewid: 13004Chapter: 1
I'd heard how good this was and figured I'd better check it out. One word: wow. That was so very powerful. You really pack a punch in such a small space (just another example of quality over quantity!). You take something so simple, so ordinary, and make it so touching and personal. Great job!

Reviewer: VaniityXDate: 2002-12-03
Reviewid: 10998Chapter: 1
How very creepy! That literally gave me chills through the whole time I read it. It reminds me of the odd games I used to play when I was little. I can honestly see children singing that in the future. I didn't pick up on who the main character was, though.

Reviewer: Narcissa MalfoyDate: 2002-11-27
Reviewid: 10282Chapter: 1
I'm speechless. As an antiquarian at heart, I revel in the old meanings
of nursery rhymes etc. At family parties, I give stirring renditions of
old Napoleon Bonaparte rhymes, "And he feasts on, breakfasts, dines on,
ever day on naughty people!" to the terror of my younger siblings and
cousins. And here you are doing the same thing, except projecting the
present into the future, when it too is reduced into rhymes. JKR has
scared me so badly, I suppose, with the graveyard scene and all, that
these rhymes made me catch my breath.

But in the end, there was also something nice about the feeling, that
even Voldemort in the end will be reduced to a rhyme. Hah! I feel he
wouldn't be too flattered.

NM

Reviewer: RebeccagraceDate: 2002-11-25
Reviewid: 10160Chapter: 1
Wow. That was an experience in fear. It gave me goosebumps, for real. I love your writing style. Simple, but you really get a lot said. No extra words, just emotions...it was wonderful and haunting and so, so sad.

Reviewer: AmiDate: 2002-11-25
Reviewid: 10114Chapter: 1
Oooooo. Absolutely creepy.

Reviewer: CrystalDate: 2002-11-25
Reviewid: 10107Chapter: 1
This story packed a tremendous emotional wallop in one short chapter. You are tops with the "brushstroke technique," evoking a mood with a few well-chosen words. I really felt this old woman's sadness, and the weight of her memories. And seeing Voldemort reduced to a children's nursery rhyme game was a different perspective.

I wonder who the woman was. McGonagall? Poppy Pomfrey? A very old Hermione?

Reviewer: Emma DalrympleDate: 2002-11-22
Reviewid: 9824Chapter: 1
This story made me shiver. Very haunting and poignant and very well done. Sadly true in real life, as well. After all, the Black Death became "Ring Around the Roses." Is this McGonagall?

Reviewer: ChambraigneDate: 2002-11-20
Reviewid: 9612Chapter: 1
I just want to repeat what has been said before: powerful and thought-provoking.

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2002-11-19
Reviewid: 9544Chapter: 1
Excellent and creepy. I liked how you didn't give the name of the main character. My favorite line of the song was "ĎCause heíll skin ya if youíre skinny and heíll eat ya if youíre stout."

Reviewer: Talking Purple RabbitsDate: 2002-11-19
Reviewid: 9521Chapter: 1
::cries too::

However did you come up with that? It's quite luvly. And a cute song...well, not cute, exactly, but well written.

What happens if the person who stands in the middle doesn't catch the ball?

~TPR

Reviewer: yasamanDate: 2002-11-18
Reviewid: 9504Chapter: 1
Wow...this was chilling.

I remember when I found out just what the "Ring Around the Rosey" song was about, and this reminds me of that. The "Terror becomes a game." line really fit with the tone.

Great fic, noodles!

Reviewer: KylaraDate: 2002-11-18
Reviewid: 9501Chapter: 1
How dark, how disturbing, and how eerily realistic. Very good.

Reviewer: LouiseDate: 2002-11-18
Reviewid: 9479Chapter: 1
Oh my god, that was creepy...
Kindof make me imagine how people back there will react listening to 'ring around the rosies'
very creative

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2002-11-18
Reviewid: 9470Chapter: 1
Awww. This is kind of sad, but I mean that in a good way :) It's very interesting how you don't identify the narrator -- it leads you to wonder what came out of Voldemort's second rise to power. If children are making a game out of him, I hope it was a happy ending (but not Mr. Voldie, but who cares about him? :D), but then you never know...

Anyway, great job!

Reviewer: zequistDate: 2002-11-18
Reviewid: 9464Chapter: 1
Wow, that was terrific, thought-provoking, and so true. War is such an enormous and powerful thing that it's impossible to fully understand one you haven't lived through. My parents were children in WWII, and parents of young children during Vietnam, but even for all the stories they've told me about those years, it's still much easier for me to relate to the Gulf War, which was a game of tiddly-winks compared to previous wars, just because it's the one I experienced for myself. But in a way there's a happy ending in this story too. The children may not understand or fully appreciate the sacrifices of their grandparents, but their grandparents fought to create a world where children can laugh at something feared rather than still living in fear of it, and obviously they succeeded.
VERY well done.

Reviewer: YolandaDate: 2002-11-18
Reviewid: 9457Chapter: 1
This was quite a chilling and accurate portrayal of the things people do to deal with the horror of death. The parallel to Ring Around the Roses is great.

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2002-11-18
Reviewid: 9446Chapter: 1
Noodles, this is amazingly profound. Dark. Eerie. Poignant. Current. Timeless.

<<Without the first-hand experience of the agonies of fear and of war, the stories become entertainment. History becomes legend.

Terror becomes a game.>>

True.

Powerfully done.

Axelle

Reviewer: MincotDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9409Chapter: 1
This was brilliant in a quiet and understated way. I got memory chills in the way you were able to show both the casual way children deal with horrors, and the way in which the present and the past mirror--and map--each other. Lovely, lovely job--thank you for sharing.

Reviewer: CatherineDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9402Chapter: 1
Powerful!

Catherine

Reviewer: KatinkaDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9400Chapter: 1
Wow. So much power, for such a short piece. I feel like I've been hit over the head, for lack of a better explanation. I'm sure many of the older generation feel this way today -- not having lived through such tragedies, those younger can easily fall into ignorance and apathy. The words and phrasing you use are so effective. Very original, and very well-written!

Reviewer: pubDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9381Chapter: 1
Original! :)

Reviewer: JestanaDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9377Chapter: 1
Excellent! I liked how you did this. Especially when you mention that children aren't frightened by the stories of old men and women. That is so true. I like the song the children sing. Bravo!

Reviewer: Georgia RussellDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9358Chapter: 1
Singular. Potent. Chilling.

Reviewer: B. NonymousDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9352Chapter: 1
Hmmm, doesn't seem like an ex-head of Gryffindor (I'm guessing that's who the narrator was) to completely lose heart over this. OTOH, perhaps being firsthand witness to enough horrors will strike fear into the stoutest of hearts.

To be fair, 'tis only a small nit to pick in a fine portrait of a future worth fighting for.

Reviewer: GwenaDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9347Chapter: 1
This story was beautiful. I remember being horified when I found out what "Ring around the rosies" actually about. I guess Voldemort would be reduced to a childs game eventually as well. Thank you for a wonderful read.

Reviewer: AnjerlaDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9328Chapter: 1
Good God. That's about all I can say. This is amazing. It really hit me hard because one of the things that has struck me hardest about the Harry Potter books is how evil Voldemort is, and how deep it runs. He's a very intruiging character, as is the entire idea of evil in Harry Potter. So this especially hit home, as I can identify with how terrifying that man is, and how these kids have no idea...and how it must sound to someone who actually went through it. You're brilliant, I love it.

Reviewer: JoylynDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9327Chapter: 1
This just gave me goosebumps. The first person narrative really worked for it -- the narrator's feelings came through well.

Creepy, too. This year is the first time in my life that war has been anything more than a history lesson in my mind, and the thought of actually living through it and facing it again... it's eerie.

I especially liked how you introduced the children and her relief at seeing them -- and then showed us the reality in which these children must live. That song just... like I said, goosebumps.

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9319Chapter: 1
Wow. Powerful and brilliant, with haunting echoes of "ring around a rosey" and the plague. And other horrors too; things that are allowed to fade from memory. Horrors that shouldn't be permitted to fade, for fear that they might happen again.

Reviewer: AlkariDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9316Chapter: 1
How terribly sad, and how spine chilling.

As I write my own MWPP fic, I have been thinking of what it must be like for those who lived through Grindlewald, and then Voldemort's first rise to power - and are now faced with a third dark time. Your simple device of using the children's games and songs - in all thier innocence - is just so sad, so telling, about what their parents and grandparents woudl have gone through.

There must have been so many people who were children in WW1, then fought in WW2, and then had the horrors of Eastern Europe, or the Korean war, etc - your fic is just so sad, and so very, very realistic.

Alkari
I can just feel for that old lady.

Reviewer: oybolshoiDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9296Chapter: 1
very effective - reminds me of ring around the rosy (do kids even do that anymore?).

Reviewer: RugiDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9294Chapter: 1
I really liked the feeling behind this story. It describes how time trivializes everything. What was shattering to one generation, is an amusing anecdote or dull history lesson for another.

But it also a streak of hopefulnes to it. Everything, no matter how terrible, fades given enough time.

Lovely and beautifully written story.

"Proud old heroes of a forgotten war."

Reviewer: ZiskDate: 2002-11-17
Reviewid: 9293Chapter: 1
Dang. Masterful commentary on "the way things are". Good job - can't think of anything else to say.

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