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Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Mischief Managed
Review(s): 92

Reviewer: SamDate: 2004-10-05
Reviewid: 100429Chapter: 10
This is a awesome story in 3 parts. I sincerely hope that a tiny bit of it,or something similar is used by JKR later in the series. Keep on writing:D I'm looking forward to reading more.

Reviewer: HPGirlDate: 2004-01-19
Reviewid: 67734Chapter: 7


Reviewer: azrionaDate: 2003-12-28
Reviewid: 64991Chapter: 10
I liked this series of stories a lot. Itís really well written, with excellent pacing and good punctuation (which you know as well as I is not common in the fanfic realm).

I liked what you did with the Marauderís Map, allowing it to show not only Hogwarts but really wherever a person happens to be standing. (Silly Harry, he should have taken it with him to the Ministry in OotP!)

Mr. Padfoot sends his regards, and hopes that Mr Wormtail hasnít painted himself into a corner.

How funny that even Siriusí essence pokes fun at Peter Ė itís almost as though Sirius never expected Peter to do very well on his own.

ďLong-lasting Canary Creams. We eat them, turn into canaries, and we fly out of here.Ē

Long Live Weasleyís Wizard Wizzes.

ďIt sounds like the rat is trying to one up me.Ē

Snape is excellent here, heís totally in character and heís so sarcastic and mean, I canít help but like him. Heís also really really funny, although Iím fairly certain he doesnít mean to be.

The sequence where Sirius saves Peter from the Dementors is one of the best action scenes Iíve seen in a long time. I think it was probably the best scene in the whole series.

One thing I wanted to comment on: the use of ďI solemnly swear.Ē I found it interesting that the phrase became something totally different to Peter than how it was originally meant. Instead of being a promise that the wool will be pulled over someoneís eyes, when he says this to Ron, itís as though he is promising to come clean about everything.

I am sorry that we didnít find out what happened to Deirdre Ė it would have been interesting to see what she thought of the whole mess. And Peter still sort of needs to apologize to her.

Otherwise, excellent story, and one of the better Peterfics Iíve run across. Thanks!

Reviewer: RugiDate: 2003-02-21
Reviewid: 21324Chapter: 8
'"You didn't help at Hogwarts with Crabbe and Goyle. How could you help against the Dark Lord?" Peter said earnestly.'

That really sums it up doesn't it? And it makes bitter kind of sense. Peter wasn't willing to die.

Reviewer: RugiDate: 2003-02-21
Reviewid: 21321Chapter: 7
"Peter's wide-open eyes jumped between the sky, the Marauders Map, and Sirius. In spite of his obvious terror, Peter looked to Sirius for instructions on what to do next."

Another thing I love about this fic. Even though Peter is redeemed he doesn't stop being the Peter who needs to follow someone.

I really enjoyed what the patroni were. Remus's was especially clever. And I liked the veritaserum laced chocolate bars. Remus and Sirius are still wise enough not to take chances.

Reviewer: RugiDate: 2003-02-21
Reviewid: 21320Chapter: 6
"Peter Pettigrew had made another in a long series of terrible mistakes. In his quest to latch on to a thought happy enough to potentially generate a Patronus, he unwittingly had given the dementors precisely what they wanted. They had picked up on his straw-clutching as sharks pick up the scent of blood. Six dementors now formed a circle around Peter, each spaced equally on the circle."

What an impressive beginning paragraph!

Okay this chapter was like watching someone bleed to death - but in a good way! I wanted to cry. I thought the motives you gave Peter were brilliant. The downtrodden always want something that will finally set them free and having Peter want Crabbe and Goyle dead was perfect, appropriate, and surprising all at the same time (How JKRish!). I also thought that it was interesting how Reynolds slowly pulled him in.

Reviewer: RugiDate: 2003-02-21
Reviewid: 21318Chapter: 5
Hey! I am back and reading again. I got hit by a huge pile of exams but I am using this breather to catch up with everything.

I love this chapter. Peter's memories were wonderful as was the way in which you portrayed Peter of the past. He has a streak of timidity that was dangerous but he is also charming in his own way. I really liked his having a skill in cartography.

And my favorite quote from this chapter?

"Peter yawned. He had been trying unsuccessfully to read up on the American Revolution's consequences to Britain's magical community. Unlike most of Professor Binns's topics in History of Magic, this one did not involve goblins to an excessive degree. He stood up, rubbed his eyes, and walked over to where James was studying."

"Goblins to an excessive degree" - snerk!

Reviewer: amulderDate: 2003-01-28
Reviewid: 18183Chapter: 9
This was wonderfully subtle:
[Ginny said] "I get to go decompress at the Burrow, and then it's back here for the New Year's Ball, probably."
"Yeah. That'll be nice." Harry hesitated. Ginny looked at him anxiously, but then rolled her eyes when he seemed to have lost his courage.

I completely missed this the first time I read it. But after reading the follow-up Epilogue story I had to come back and see if
there were any hints of H/G since they clearly did at least spend some time together at that New Years Ball.

Well done. It's great when you find little tidbits buried in the work.

thanks for sharing

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-01-28
Reviewid: 18129Chapter: 10
Awww! I was so afraid you were going to kill Peter off...anyway, I loved this story. Besides the stuff I've already mentioned, Sirius' and Remus' Patroni were great. (Thanks for explaining why you chose them!) Percy's turnaround and the trial were great, too. Great, great job!

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-01-28
Reviewid: 18122Chapter: 5
Peter's memories were so sweet. I'm glad you made him good at some things!

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-01-28
Reviewid: 18121Chapter: 4
How nice that the Muggle-borns' parents were trying to come together and look out for each other :) And I was really surprised when "Mr. Granger" took out that wand!

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-01-28
Reviewid: 18116Chapter: 1
The bit about the ratio of screaming to laughter was a bit scholarly -- younger readers may have to read it twice and then ask their parents what it meant -- but the rest of this chapter was riveting. I'm glad I found out how the Trio wound up in the Riddle House. The prank on Trelawney and the "Parents' Kit" sound funny :) I guess I'd better get back to reading to find out if you mention what's in it!

Reviewer: EllaDate: 2003-01-26
Reviewid: 17969Chapter: 1

Reviewer: amulderDate: 2003-01-25
Reviewid: 17805Chapter: 10
Hi again B.,

Simply stellar job here. Hearty congratulations. In many ways a short
story, yet still packed full of many interesting little details.
For instance, the background bit of Ginny using a Time turner to make up
for lost time in her 4th year. It just adds some great depth to the

It is a very tough job to try and assign motivations to what Peter did to
the Potters, and I think you've done a great job at explaining it.
Oh and best wishes with the twins. Hmm, another Fred and George?? :-)

thanks very much for sharing

Reviewer: Persephone_KoreDate: 2003-01-22
Reviewid: 17307Chapter: 10
I want you to know that I've enjoyed this whole series a great deal. The titles are clever, the plot and characterization fascinating... I loved the idea of the Map and the personalities of his old friends were the final spur to turn Peter back around, and you deal with all the consequences very well. It's very nicely wrapped up, too, though I admit to a little regret that it's over. (But then, the epilogue sounds interesting. :))

Reviewer: The White LilyDate: 2003-01-22
Reviewid: 17287Chapter: 10
Marvellous. You've managed to redeem Peter in a realistic and emotionally satisfying way. And all the problems associated with his betrayal don't just go away all of a sudden, he has to pay for his crimes. Good work. And congratulations on the twins to both you and Mrs. Nonymous!

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readers!Date: 2003-01-22
Reviewid: 17274Chapter: 10
Thanks folks. BTW, the Epilogue (title withheld because it's a spoiler) will be up soon, depending on NZ's latency, and a special delivery from Audrey!

NZ - Tricia _was_ a past romance of sorts, but it became something more platonic, and that's how they think of each other. Fortunately, Harry will get a clue.

Audrey - We've already chatted, and you know what's coming! :)

Ozma - W.r.t. the rat, there's still an epilogue... :(

Dr. M - Once again, you prove your inner eye - in multiple ways. The trio was at Sirius's hearing, but not at the Peter trial.

Julie - Thanks for reading! When I kicked this off, I didn't know there were that many redeemed!Peter fics. I'm glad mine wasn't tacky.

I Like Chocolate - "You" ;)

Lilac - The New Year's Ball "story" is a small post-ball vignette. It should, however, sum things up nicely as an epilogue to these Peter stories.

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-01-22
Reviewid: 17271Chapter: 1
<<<Lilac - My favorite song parodist. Get that Femmes song on the Quill, and I still wanna see Draco-as-Eminem do "Without Me"!>>>

I am still blushing from your nice comments, thank you so, so much. It means so much especially coming from you, oh great author! I feel very honored and now (with you asking so nicely, of course) I am inspired to do the deed of an Eminem parody. I can't say I'll finish it soon, as I myself am recovering from a tonsilectomy (nasty business, especially since I'm 31) but it's on my to-do list.

Now, about your stories...I'm so glad your wife challenged you! It's totally understandable that you are taking a hiatus from writing, although I am curious about your Sirius stories, but I can wait! I'm patient, especially when compared to twins! You four will be busy -- I do hope you are getting some outside help (neighbors, friends, family, etc) for the first month. And I hope you've been rubbing your wife's feet _a lot_! Come to think of it, maybe that's where you got the idea for Mr. and Mrs. Granger...

Oh, and I am interested in a New Year Ball story (is that what you called it?)featuring GettingAClue!Harry, but only after you become a Daddy, but like I said before, I can wait! I am learning patience in my own reality tv show starring me, called "Mommyhood"...oh, yes, I am earning every little teeny tiny bit of patience I develop along the way, let me tell you...

Thanks for sharing your story! Thanks for challenging me! See you around the Quill!

Oh, and you MUST tell us when the blessed event one of us, or go to the SQ forums! We want to make sure you're all okay!


Reviewer: I like chocolateDate: 2003-01-22
Reviewid: 17243Chapter: 10

Reviewer: JulieDate: 2003-01-22
Reviewid: 17228Chapter: 10
Hmmm...I can't believe I haven't reviewed this yet. I just now caught up on the last four chapters, and I'm sorry I haven't reviewed before now.

This is a really great story. There are a lot of "Peter redeems himself" stories out there, but many of them are very tacky. You've done a wonderful job!

I'm glad to see he's going to get some help, too. And that Sirius and Remus seem to be sticking by him.

I loved the scene with Harry and Ginny. Is he going to pick up a clue anytime soon? I guess I'll have to wait for your New Year's Ball story to find out.

I like all the details you include, too. Like the headlines. And many other things that I noticed at the time but didn't take notes on (no, I'm not the best reviewer).

Basically, I really like this story. I'll be looking forward to more stories for you, but I won't hold my breath. I know you'll be busy. Congratulations on the twins, too! I hope everything goes well with them.

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-01-21
Reviewid: 17206Chapter: 10
Wow... that's the fastest trial with that many charges I've ever seen!

Pretty cool, though. For a second I thought that Sirius was going to have to go back to Dementor-Land for a whole year, and I thought, "Hey! That's not fair!".... but then I finished reading the sentence. *bangs head on keyboard*

Good for him. He's free, he's got a clean record, and he's still fairly well-off with all that back payment. Enough for a few trips across the pond, huh?

Dude... introducing a new character right at the end? Well, as long as Sophie gets written into a future fic, I'm cool with that. : )

Peter got off easy. Usually, in most fics, he either ends up a greasy spot on the floor, or in Azkaban (with the Dementors that people keep forgetting are in league with Voldemort now-- glad you remembered that). So Peter gets to go chill at the West Coast while everyone else fights Oldy Voldy in dreary Britain.

Well, at least the mental hospital food will be sufficiently gross. Hospital food-- Ick.

His destination to San Francisco was kept a secret, right? So Oldy Voldy doesn't try to follow him. I mean, if the guy is obsessive enough to keep trying to kill a kid year after year, then he is probably going to keep searching for his less-than-faithful pet rat, and he won't care if he has to go overseas.

No trio in this chapter. Were they at the trial?

Congrats on the twins, and on finishing this fic in a relatively short time. I wish other authors would write as fast as you. *looks pointedly at said authors* (Sorry, I have been suffering from severe GM deprivation.)

Ooh! An Inner Eye Award? Cool, thanks! : ) But no tea leaves for me, thank-you-very-much.

Until the next upda- er, the next fic,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-01-21
Reviewid: 17169Chapter: 10
Terrific ending, but I am sorry to see this wonderful (worm)tale end! The whole Percy-in-the-Courtroom scene was brilliant! It's always a treat to see Percy's strengths showed so well. He's young but competent, and it's great to see that his superiors know.

Black's fate delighted me, especially the hug between Harry and Sirius. Peter's fate was better than I'd feared it would be, since you did such a magnificent job of making me feel sympathy for the Rat. (I was really worried that the poor little guy wouldn't survive the story.

Congratulations to you and Mrs. Nonymous, and the twins!

And thank you for your thank you! I hope that you will have the time and inspiration to write the stories that you mentioned. I'll be looking forward to reading them when you do!

Reviewer: AudreyDate: 2003-01-21
Reviewid: 17132Chapter: 9
'Harry interrupted the outbreak of a potential SPEW meeting with his own, more sobering thoughts.'

..And that right there is one of the reasons why I absoloutely *adore* your stories.
Even with all of the *amazing* characterisations, (I love Percy's, especially), the interesting OC's, and the fact that you're faced with the task of keeping all of the story elements in line, you still manage to make me laugh my head off at regular intervals.
My hat goes off to you, sir. :D

(Don't mind me, did I ever tell you that I SUX at reviews? Well, I do.)

Can't wait to read the last chapter (well, *you* know what I mean ~_^),

Reviewer: Night ZephyrDate: 2003-01-17
Reviewid: 16561Chapter: 9
Nice, tightly-written scene, Mr. Nonymous! I really enjoyed seeing you set up the situation with Peter (heh! Stumpy indeed! :), Sirius, Percy and the Trio. It gave you the elements to take care of so many issues in the one scene--clearing Sirius, indicting Peter, making sure that Percy Weasley saw the light (and felt sufficiently guilty for not believing the rest of his family, which he probably deserved).

I liked Tricia Murray (and that she was Percy's boss :)--thought it was different and interesting that Sirius was only a friend (and you resisted the urge to tie her to Sirius as a past romance like so many others do). She did a good job at maintaining her composure after being faced with what was so obviously a failure of the wizarding legal system. I'd also like to hear more from Wollenstone.

A really, good, strong chapter, I thought. Your characterization of Dumbledore was spot on--I could completely feel how pleased he was to be getting Sirius cleared as well.

The Harry and Ginny scene helped us to see what we needed to about Harry's feelings on Sirius and how excited he would be at "possibly having his own somewhat-responsible adult who actually cared about him" (yeah, I'd go with somewhat-responsible, too:)

As adamantly R/H as I am, I'm always rather on the fence about Harry and Ginny. If it happens, fine--if not, oh well. (Personally, I think the boy's agenda for the next few years is going to rule out much opportunity for working on a relationship.) Ginny, bless her heart, took the tiny bit of recognition she got from him and decided to be happy with that.

Harry! *sigh* Oh, Harry. Get a clue, honey.

(And Ginny--I'll be sending you a two-by-four in the mail--you know what to do with it, right? That's correct, my dear--right upside the head... :))


Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2003-01-13
Reviewid: 16083Chapter: 9
Ozma - Thank you so much! Tricia Murray (nee Oakman), came to me out of left field. And Wollenstone... well, if you've ever seen M*A*S*H, think "Charles Emerson Winchester, III". :)

Alkari - Wow! It's ego-inflating enough having Ozma as a fan. Both Mrs. Nonymous and I LOVE your Remus stories. I'm glad you like these (and I hope I treated Remus okay). As for the harsh penalties - those are maximums. A decent judge would take into account all of the circumstances! :) And as for Sirius and Tricia being friends - I've imagined him being not unlike the cliche, but with some noteworthy exceptions like Tricia.

Lilac - Harry _may_ get a clue yet, but it'll have to be a separate post. Anyone else here interested in the New Year's Ball?

Dabbler - We have our first two children on the way. That'll seriously cut into the writing time.

Jestana - I look forward to reading your take on Peter.

Dr. M - If I write a Wollenstone story, it'll include why Percy W. was named after him. And yes, "moderately good" for Snape is his normal self! :)

Herm-own-ninny - You're a genius (catching "All three Marauders"). The twins will be girls, BTW, but you knew that already, didn't you?! ;) --- James

Reviewer: Herm-own-ninnyDate: 2003-01-13
Reviewid: 16079Chapter: 9
I really love this whole series . . . it's been a refreshing read! I have to admit, I'd love to see other stories from you -- and soon! -- but if you've got twins on the way, I suppose you'll be a little busy. If they are boys, will you name them Gred and Forge?

The line in Dumbledore's note about "all three Mauraders" was so bittersweet . . . it's touches like this one that really add depth to a story.


Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-01-13
Reviewid: 16057Chapter: 9
Yay! All that's left is a a court case, which will be easy to win, of course. And then Sirius is home free!

But as Harry said, they will still have a problem. A big problem with scary red eyes and a pet snake.

Glad that Percy's finally come around. And what a way for him to come around, too.

Will we find out why Percy was named after Wollenstone?

By saying Snape is in "moderately good spirits" means that he is in his usual vindictive mood, right?

Until next chapter,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: JestanaDate: 2003-01-13
Reviewid: 16031Chapter: 9
Wonderful! I loved how you handled this! I'll be writing my own version, of course, but this has given me a direction to head in for it. You're an excellent writer and I can't wait for the rest.

Reviewer: dabblerDate: 2003-01-12
Reviewid: 16000Chapter: 9
Very nice story; I'm sorry it's coming to an end but trust that you'll write others? (please!)

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-01-12
Reviewid: 15999Chapter: 9
Yay, Percy...Weasley, that is! Back in the fold! Ginny cares for Harry, obviously, and that hug was nice, but not much of a reaction from Harry. Oh, well...he's got lot's of stuff on his mind!

Reviewer: AlkariDate: 2003-01-12
Reviewid: 15980Chapter: 9
I've so enjoyed this fic - it is extremely well written, with excellent characterisation and fascinating plot. I'm sorry I haven't reviewed every chapter.

Harry and Ginny - LOL. Lovely scence, but that boy is definitely going to need a few chats to his godfather, isn't he!

Enjoyed the namesake bit, and Percy Weasley's reactions to the Animagi. I though this bit was a wonderful image:
"Percy stared at Ron, looking as hurt as a child finding out the truth about Father Christmas."

And the way Dumbeldore gently but firmly put Percy in his place with the reference to Head Boy and valuing fair play - very Albus! And something that would have got through to Percy by appealing to his sense of honour.

The sentence for being an unregistered Animagus is pretty savage. I trust the Ministry will consider that Sirius has served his term already, as it were. And I do like your little snippets about Tricia, her friendship with Sirius and the fact that he arranged a date for her. SO glad you had them as genuine friends and didn't have her being one of his (many) long-lost girlfriends - I do appreciate fics where people don't have 'that' sort of cliche Sirius.

I'm looking forward to the last chapter.


Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-01-12
Reviewid: 15972Chapter: 9
Lots of great stuff!! Loved the Harry and Ginny interplay! (Harry's almost got himself a clue there. Maybe he'll get the hint and ask Ginny to the ball?)

Wollenstone and Tricia Murray are both marvelous characters! I particularly enjoyed the reactions of Padfoot and Wormtail when Wollenstone called Snape's Veritaserum the work of a genius.

Percy's reactions to all the revelations were another highlight for me. I really loved what he said to Ron. And I enjoyed Tricia's reactions to what Sirius had been through, and Percy's reaction when he found out that Peter had been Scabbers. Wonderful apology from Percy to Ron!

Can't wait for the next chapter! I'm hoping that the title refers to the dismissal of the charges against Sirius!

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2003-01-12
Reviewid: 15934Chapter: 8
Chapter 9 (Discovery) just got submitted to Madame Pince. I hope to have the final chapter (Dismissal) finished within the week. Again, thanks so much for riding along and telling me what you think here.

VJ - Thank you. More is on its way (per above), but I'm almost finished.

Ozma - I'm glad I could mix it up w.r.t. Sirius's control and Remus's temper. And I definitely understand Peter's hatred too... trust me.

Dr. M - I knew Sirius wouldn't let Peter off the hook THAT easily, hence "Distraction". Snape saw a bit of himself in Peter, I think (as Sirius saw a bit of Snape in Peter too). That's why he said nothing when he left.

Lilac - Glad you liked the Patronus. And yes, Quodpot is that silly game the Yanks play. When chapter 10 is up, read the credits carefully.

Amberdulen - Welcome aboard. By "Forging on..." did you mean "I'm leaving, because a Parents' Kit is silly?" or "I'm reading the rest of the story, and will get back to you when it's finished." ? Just curious.

Reviewer: AmberdulenDate: 2003-01-10
Reviewid: 15808Chapter: 1
Parents' Kit? Forging on ...

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-01-09
Reviewid: 15710Chapter: 8
I can't believe I didn't reconginize "Quodpot"...I thought it was the bludger patronis, which was brilliant for Black's patronis. Excellent!

Reviewer: VJDate: 2003-01-08
Reviewid: 15621Chapter: 8
Brilliant chapter - I don't really know what to say, this story is so great! More, please!

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-01-08
Reviewid: 15615Chapter: 8
Now this sounds more like Sirius, what with all the BURSTING OUT IN ALL CAPS and such.

"You're no better than, Snape, Peter...."

You know, as I read this part, it occured to me that Snape was eavesdropping on their conversation. I can just see him getting all mad and wanting to go hex something right then, lol.

Well, all in all, this was a cool chapter, I'll be waiting for the next. I'm glad that you update often. Sometimes we readers have to wait months between updates. *coughGMcough* Generally I don't wait around that long, unless the story is one of my favorites.

Until next chapter,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-01-08
Reviewid: 15557Chapter: 8
Wow! That was intense! I admired Sirius's control. The way that Peter's confessions affected him was truly powerful. I also completely enjoyed the interplay between Remus and Severus. It's delightful to see Remus showing some temper. He usually has to be the one who's patient and in control.

As a former bullied kid, I can understand the strength of Peter's hatred for Crabbe and Goyle. He's fallen so deep into darkness that it's taken a lot of courage to find his way back and try to make amends as much as he can.

Looking forward to more!!

Reviewer: VJDate: 2003-01-07
Reviewid: 15498Chapter: 7
I've started to wait impatiently for these!! This is so great!

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2003-01-07
Reviewid: 15476Chapter: 7
Hey folks! Chapter 8 ("Distraction") is still in NZ's hands. Chapter 9 ("Discovery") is in both NZ's and Mrs. Nonymous's hands. I've yet to set down any text for Chapter 10 (Dis-
<not-yet>, it's the final chapter of the story), but once I do, I think it'll go quickly.

bmiller - Thank you.

VJA - I didn't know of many sympathetic to Peter stories. Jedi B's one is the only one I can think of off the top of my head. And I have not seen any repentant!Peter besides here.

Didi - Thanks! :)

Ozma - I'd written the part with Harry BEFORE I wrote anything else in this chapter. Originally I had Sirius actually touching his Portkey, but cutting the scene early added a bit of tension, which you caught!

Dr. M - Sirius knows when he has to cooperate. Did you read the part were Remus suggests feeding Peter a whole vial when they get home? Plus, that's why Sirius insisted I write "Distraction" instead of jumping to "Discovery" as I had originally intended. The next chapter features Peter, Sirius, no wands, a vial of Veritaserum, and a Beater's Bat.

Giesbrecht - Tell VJA I was wrong. I'm flattered that such a good MWPP writer enjoys this! (See my comment on yours for more).

Reviewer: GiesbrechtDate: 2003-01-07
Reviewid: 15475Chapter: 7
Somehow this fit perfectly with the passages of the TTT soundtrack I was listening to at the time...


Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-01-07
Reviewid: 15454Chapter: 7
Well, this was a short chapter, wasn't it?

I only have one problem with it, though: I would think that Sirius and Remus would not be so nice to Peter, even under such circumstances. He is responsible for so much of their (as well as others') suffering, after all.

So Peter has been captured. Good for Sirius.

Until next chapter,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-01-07
Reviewid: 15450Chapter: 7
Thank you for letting us know that they got away! I was really going let out a big scream! It was wonderful seeing Padfoot and Wormtail working as a team. (And I loved Remus and Sirius's Patronuses (Patroni?)

Looking forward to the next chapter!

Reviewer: DidiDate: 2003-01-03
Reviewid: 14926Chapter: 6
*says in impressed, amazed, and wonderous voice* Ooooo

Reviewer: VJADate: 2003-01-02
Reviewid: 14886Chapter: 6
Aaaaaaargh, why did it finish here? Any sympathetic-to-Peter story is good, but this is BRILLIANT! Keep using Peter-flashbacks - they're really good - and write more soon pleeeeeease!!

Reviewer: bmiller669Date: 2003-01-02
Reviewid: 14867Chapter: 1
This is wonderful! The story is great, and so is your style of writing. I cannot wait to see more!
Sincerely, Barbara

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2003-01-02
Reviewid: 14818Chapter: 6
Hang in there folks! (The much shorter) Chapters 7 AND 8 are in NZ's capable hands, and Chapter 9 is being alpha-read by Mrs. Nonymous AS I TYPE THIS! That only leaves chapter 10, and this work will be finished.

Didi - Chill girl! Take a deep breath and read the first paragraph of this update! :)

Merusa - See ch. 6, and my advice for Didi.

Ozma - I'm SO flattered, especially given your own work. I'm glad the M/MB marking reminded you of certain real-life atrocities, that's what I was aiming for. As for Peter/Deidre, the protection part was only part of why he dumped her. (I think you're being too kind to Peter, trust me, I was in his cowardly shoes once!) And Sirius and Remus will save him, at least from the Death Eaters, we hope. :O

Dr. M. - Voldie wants Peter alive. The dementors understand this.

Lilac - It was supposed to be a bit humorous. What's your line about "Does he have abrother?" from?

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-01-02
Reviewid: 14782Chapter: 6 THAT'S what he sold his friends out for. And then the big guy couldn't do what he wanted because he'd been vaporised, so Petey had no where to go but down, into rat form that is. I loved this particular line:

"And Mr. Potter... well, let's just say that Mr. Potter holds a special place in my heart."

Peter could not help saying, "Are you a Quidditch fan?"
I found that rather funny, which I hope was the spirit in which it was intended. It kind of reminded me of "He hasn't got a brother, has he?" LOL! It was a good little bit of humor in a dark flashback sequence.

Brilliant yet again!

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-01-02
Reviewid: 14763Chapter: 6
Wow. That was depressing. It's a good thing Sirius and Remus are there to help him now!

About JKR's grammatical errors-- I think they were supposed to be that way.

How come the Dementors just stood (hovered?) there instead of sucking his soul out?

Cool chapter. It won't be long until the next one is posted, will it?

Until then,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2003-01-01
Reviewid: 14749Chapter: 6
Poor Peter. Your depiction of how he entered the Dark Lord's service once baby-step at a time was quite believable. By the time he woke up and realized what was going on it would have taken more courage than the poor man had to turn away from that path.

The description of the "M"s and "MB"s also sent chills down my spine. It brought to mind images of yellow Stars of David sewed onto the clothing of Jews who lived in the Third Reich, and were marked for death. Subtle and brilliant writing!

Peter's break-up with Diedre was heartbreaking. He was afraid for her, and too afraid to tell her the real reason for the breakup. He wanted to protect her from Crabbe and Goyle, poor boy.

Your depiction of the sorrows of Peter's life were all so well done. His private tragedies were so very human.

Have Sirius and Remus come to save him? I hope so...

Looking forward to the next chapter!

Reviewer: MerusaDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13744Chapter: 5
Yay, I just finished reviewing the last chapter last night! This is a really good story. But just what provoked Peter to give up Lily and James's hiding place? Write quickly!

Reviewer: DidiDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13742Chapter: 5
Darn it! What's gonna happen! HURRY AND UP-DATE!

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13732Chapter: 5
Wow! Some new faces appearing here. That's cool. And you die-hards are still hanging around. That's cool too. A free hint to those of you who read here... a preview of sorts for the next instalment "Despair" can be seen in the previous "...That I Am Up To No Good". I won't tell you where precisely, but it should be pretty easy to spot. I try and leave clues along with the occasional red herring.

To all of you who are asking me to "hurry up", remember that the whole reason I'm writing in the first place is because I can't tell JKR to "hurry up" with book 5. :)

Merusa - H/G implications... well there's still definitely interest in one direction. My H/G sentiments aren't as strong as my R/Hr ones, but we'll see what happens, if anything.

Cristina - I feel the same way w.r.t. closure, which is why I'm writing this story instead of just having left it with the first story, or even the first two stories.

Dr. M - 7 flashbacks actually (young Peter, train, Remus, James, Sirius, Deidre, work). There will be more (of highly variable lengths) in the next chapter. Enough of a hint for who has Peter? :)

Lilac - The bar is spiked with only one thing, and there's one female flashback in "Disheartenment". And there will be little hope in the next chapter.

Becky - If Sirius's thread breaks, there will be five more chapters. If it holds, there will be four. I haven't decided which yet. (The destination will remain the same - it's just the journey that'd change.)

Ozma - See my hint at the beginning regarding Simon. (Remember where he worked.)

Kayjal - Thank you.

Reviewer: kayjalDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13726Chapter: 5
your story is EXCE;;ENT !! hurry up with the rest!!!!

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13716Chapter: 5
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!! Cliffhanger!!! Poor Peter, unable to find a single happy memory that could sustain a Patronus, and now to be taken by the Death Eaters!!! Peter's happy memories were very poignant. Especially the one with his father. I couldn't help wondering why Peter didn't want to think of his father. He hadn't betrayed Simon, had he?

Anyway, can't wait for the next installment!!!

Reviewer: BeckyDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13710Chapter: 5
Gods, I almost feel sorry for Peter. He's painted himself into a corner. You can never be happy once you've betrayed those closest to you... and now he can't protect himself.

Sirius must be hanging from a thread...

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13699Chapter: 5 the next chapter anything you want, as long as you don't "dis" us and stop writing! (he he)
I loved the flashbacks, it establishes the relationship he's had with the most influential males in his life, not counting Moldivort. I like that he was the one with the cartography talent. Yes, I am sympathizing for Wormtail. I admit it!
I can't wait to see what the "Honeydukes bar from Hell" is going to do...didn't they fill it up with potions 'n' stuff? I haven't read that chapter for a while.
Anxiously awaiting "Despair" with hope...
Lilac, who thinks your pen name is brilliant!

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13696Chapter: 5
Cool chapter. It's kind of on the short side, though. Maybe it only seem short because I just finished reading a very long fic a while ago. Anyhoo, on with the review:

Hmm... I'm counting... 5 flashbacks. Lots of 'em. Anyhoo, I don't think any one of them could produce a decent Patronus.

Lucky for him Remus and Sirius are coming to help.

The six shadowy figures are Dementors, right? Or are they Death Eaters?

Until next update,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: CristinaDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13693Chapter: 5
Hurry and post the next chapter! I really *really* want the Marauders to end with some sort of closure..ya know? This is the closest we're getting, as of now :)

Reviewer: MerusaDate: 2002-12-23
Reviewid: 13676Chapter: 4
LOL! This was a good end-of-chapter. This is a wonderful series. I have to check the date on this story- how long has it been since you've updated? I hope you finish it soon!
Oh, and subtle H/G implications....well, I think they were implications....I hope....

Reviewer: CLDate: 2002-12-18
Reviewid: 13166Chapter: 4
Ack..update soon please!!!

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2002-12-17
Reviewid: 13033Chapter: 4
Normally wouldn't jump in so quickly again, but chapter 5 is doing better than I'd thought. Just two more flashbacks (Deidre, and one other...), and it's off to Mrs. Nonymous and NZ.

Sabre - Sorry I missed you last time. If Moody weren't retired, you'd see one helluva interrogation. (I have this theory about Moody and the Lestranges, you see... ;)

Jestana - Welcome aboard. Re: Snape, can you think of a more UNlikely place for him to hide?

Dr. M - We already had a Dismemberment in "...No Good". :) As for L&J, they weren't expecting visitors. As for Mrs. L, you and Axelle share that opinion. An astute reader should know what Mrs. L. knows and Mad-Eye doesn't.

Rugi - I dropped the Mad-Eye hint in chapter 1. And as for the Parents' Kit, there's a whole story one could write that Ron merely whizzed past involving money laundering, Muggle Nobilesse Oblige, and Weasley's Wizard Wheezes.

Reviewer: RugiDate: 2002-12-16
Reviewid: 12909Chapter: 4
Oh I hope Peter find his patronus! I am anxious to find out what it is.

"Hermione nodded again, but this time she looked at Ron. Harry remembered that even the Dursleys had received a letter offering them, free of charge, a "Muggle Parents' Kit" containing their choice of charmed items, for use in escaping an attack by Lord Voldemort or his Death Eaters. Harry smiled briefly as he remembered the opposing forces of desiring contact with rich folks and the rejection of all things magical turning Uncle Vernon's face the color of black-currant ice cream."

Okay I LOVE the idea of a kit for muggle parents since they would incredibly vulnerable to attack. I also like how you showed the Dursley's reaction to all of it. They would really be trapped between their desire for wealth and wealthy people and their htred of things magical wouldn't they?

Woohoo Professor Moody! Or maybe just Mad Eye now. Wonderful having him use Barty's trick against the DE's. I was so worried for the Grangers and then BAM! Moody saves everyone. Very nice and neat trick that was!

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2002-12-16
Reviewid: 12881Chapter: 4
<<<Lilac - Only Moody was polyjuiced. Mr. Granger was on the floor, one hand on Mrs. Granger, and one hand ready to touch the portkey at Mad-Eye's cue. (IT's all in the chapter already!)>>>

:very sheepish grin: It was, wasn't it? I didn't read that part too carefully, did I? Shame on me! That's why I'm not a detective in R.L. :)

:reads that part again:

That's why he was massaging her feet! I get it now!

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2002-12-15
Reviewid: 12689Chapter: 4
Second read, more stuff to say.

I want to slap Mrs. Lestrange. That look of hers just gets to me.

Glad Harry's finally becoming not -so-clueless. Don't get me wrong--the guy ROX-- but he tends to ignore some things that should be obvious.

Upon reading the list of reviews: An "enhanced" snake? Ick. That is not cool. So, how many people can Nagini eat at once?

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2002-12-15
Reviewid: 12688Chapter: 4
'nuther cool chapter!

So Moody was at the Grangers', and they left with a Portkey. Cool. Kind of makes you wonder why Lily and James didn't just Apparate or Portkey out of Godric's Hollow when they saw Voldie coming.

Anyhoo, I'm not one for Peter redemption, but this fic is starting to make me feel sorry for the guy. I still don't like him, though.

All the chapter titles start with Dis-. Cool. Just as long as there is n't a chapter called, "Dismemberment". Ick.

Until the next chapter,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: JestanaDate: 2002-12-15
Reviewid: 12642Chapter: 4
Excellent story. All three of them. I really liked how the Map encouraged Wormtail to do the right thing. I like the way you've used the charms in the title of your story. Draco is pretty good. Snape hiding out with Lupin and Sirius. What an irony!

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2002-12-14
Reviewid: 12638Chapter: 4
Glad to see I haven't lost any readers. (And tell your friends... I thrive on feedback! ;)

pub - thank you

Audz - Also thank you, and GREAT drawing. Folks - check out her drawing from "...No Good". It's great!

Axelle - Welcome back. Mrs. Nonymous had a lot to do with the Common Room scene in chapter 2. I'm glad the Malfoy family malice is so clear in the dialog. And there's a whole story about why that owl is transatlantic. I probably won't be able to tell it, however, with twins arriving in March.

Ozma - I'm glad you laughed. Snape being with R & S is supposed to be funny!

Lilac - Only Moody was polyjuiced. Mr. Granger was on the floor, one hand on Mrs. Granger, and one hand ready to touch the portkey at Mad-Eye's cue. (IT's all in the chapter already!)

Everyone - There will be lots of Peter angst. You should feel a bit sorry for him, but you should (IMHO) also still feel the anger you've felt through his actions in canon. He's rather tragic, I think. I hope I can show these conflicting views in the next 2-3 chapters. And you'll at least hear about Mad-Eye in the final chapter (9 or 10).

Thanks folks! And don't forget to view Audrey's drawing here on the Quill!

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2002-12-14
Reviewid: 12619Chapter: 4 was MOODY! Okay, I knew that the Grangers were the ones that were polyjuiced, thanks to your hint, but I wasn't expecting Moody! Nice touch! So who was Mrs. Granger, who disappeared?

<<<"You smile just like he does, Harry," noted Hermione's mother, glancing at Dumbledore.>>>

Tee hee hee! Harry's getting to be a quick thinker, isn't he?

Hope chapter 5 is coming soon!

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2002-12-14
Reviewid: 12552Chapter: 4
A transatlantic owl? Hmmm... And I'm curious as to how Snape ends up bunking with Remus and Sirius!

<<...realizing that since he had never really learned how to Apparate, he probably never was a real Death Eater.

"Never was a real anything," he muttered to himself. And once again, he found himself drifting in a vast in-between. >>

You really know how to tug on those heartstrings when it comes to Peter, don't you? ;) I feel so sorry for him!

Oh, I'm so glad someone's thought ahead to save the Grangers! A wonderful scene, BTW. But... I have to say, Mrs L's defiant, almost triumphant look bothers me! Could this all be a trap? Was it staged? Even for a distinguished ex-Auror, perhaps their capture was too easy? Maybe I'm reading too much into that.

LOL! And nice save by Harry! It's nice to see him portrayed as thinking quick on his feet, which I think he does quite well in canon. :)

GREAT work!

You've been quite prolific so far, so I'm sure we won't have to wait too long to get our fix!


Reviewer: SabreDate: 2002-12-14
Reviewid: 12549Chapter: 4
I'm so glad you spared the Grangers...and allowed Moddy some retribution. I don't think I like to know just how far he would go in interrogation. Great story, although I'm still eager to see whether there's more to Pettigrews actions than saving his own skin...Roll on the next two chapters!

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2002-12-14
Reviewid: 12547Chapter: 3
Oh, no! *gasp* Not the Grangers! What a place to leave a cliffhanger! Very cruel, very Slytherin. ;)

The conversation between Draco and Lucius--excellent! They're so palpably wicked, your dialogue shows us this on its own, rather than it having to be narrated.

I was worried about Wormtail in the last chapter, and now I've got the Grangers on that list, too!

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2002-12-14
Reviewid: 12546Chapter: 4
Thank you, thank you, thank you for not letting anything awful happen to Hermione's parents!! I was so worried! Mad Eye Moody's impersonation of Mr. Granger with polyjuice was inspired. I was THRILLED to see him turn the tables on the Lestranges!

The idea of Severus, Remus and Sirius being housemates made me laugh. I loved the conversation between Remus and Severus. And Remus's comment to Sirius about Snape being jealous that Peter has a bigger price on his head.

Poor Peter. Once more, I can't help feeling sorry for him. What a strange, twisted life he's led. Looking forward to seeing more of him in upcoming chapters!

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2002-12-14
Reviewid: 12544Chapter: 2
I've been remiss in reading, B (*sheepish grin*), but I'm glad I got to see this!

I especially enjoyed the "welcome back" scene at Hogwarts and the catcalls and cheers at Ron and Hermione's admission. :)

Off to


Reviewer: AudzDate: 2002-12-10
Reviewid: 12087Chapter: 1
Hiya! *waves*

*whew* It's quite a trek over here from the art section, let me tell ya. ~_^

First: I love your stories! *is anxiously waiting to see what happens to the Grangers and Pettigrew*
I don't usually like Peter/Scabbers/Wormtail/Rat-B@$t@rd very much, but you've certainly given me a pause for thought. Thanks. :)

Second: I'd love to draw a pic (or even a few ~_^) for you (as per your request), and I was wondering if I could get your email addy, so I can show you some drafts, etc. *is being rather Percy-like today* :P

Thankies, and keep up the good work!
-Audz. :D

Reviewer: pubDate: 2002-12-04
Reviewid: 11156Chapter: 3
Please continue this story.. it was amazing and I hope to read more soon.

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2002-12-04
Reviewid: 11152Chapter: 3
I'm glad I have your attention! :) BTW, chapter 4 is in NZ's capable hands.

Lilac, Ozma, and Sabre - I will give two hints. 1.) I won't keep you in suspense in chapter 4. 2.) There will be exactly one Unforgivable Curse fired in the Granger household.

Ozma and Sabre - Yes, this story meets its redemption quota with Peter, so you get evil!Draco.

Didi - The dead Muggle-born wizard is nobody we know, but that doesn't make her (or her husband) any less important. :(

Dr. M:

1.) I made mention of the Map's dynamic properties in "I Solemnly Swear". Mrs. Nonymous thinks that in one of MWPP's hands, it Does More (TM). Even if I concede your point there, the map makes a great proximity detector (showing dots of nearby people).

2.) We know Nagini eats people from Book 4. And if Voldie did all sorts of things to himself, I'm sure he had a few things left over to enhance Nagini.

3. and 4.) Patience...

Reviewer: SabreDate: 2002-12-04
Reviewid: 11149Chapter: 3
I can't believe you left it there! Now I'm worrying about the curly cardiganned Grangers(can't help think about them like that, sorry). I liked how you've characterised Draco - there's so much redemption goes on in fanfic, that its always refreshing to see him be bad, and mean it. Can't wait for the next episode!

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2002-12-04
Reviewid: 11121Chapter: 3
First, I'd like to say that while I don't think I've reviewed, I have read you stories before, and I think they are rather good. Second, I'm sorry, but I'm going to nitpick a little bit here.

1. Remus asked Harry for the map so they could find Peter easier. Why? The map only shows the Hogwarts grounds, and they are going to Little Hangleton, so how would the map help?

2. Nagini must be one monster of a snake. I mean, she ate TWO full-growm humans, one right after another! Most large snakes (like pythons)only eat small mammals, generally anywhere between a couple weeks and several months apart. Is Nagini a magical snake? How big is she?

3. What is a Parent Kit? Will the Granger's Kit kick in soon? How does it work?

4. So Snape is gone. Hmmm.... Where did he go? Which side is he on.

Hopefully some of these questions will be answered in the next chapter.

Keep writing!

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: DidiDate: 2002-12-04
Reviewid: 11102Chapter: 3
I have one question...who was that lady that Voldemort killed? E-mail me and tell me if a future chapter doesn't let me know.

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2002-12-04
Reviewid: 11097Chapter: 3
Oh, no! Not the Grangers! Please let someone get there soon! Can't wait for the next chapter.

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2002-12-03
Reviewid: 11081Chapter: 3
Please, Please, Please don't let anything bad happen to the Grangers!!!

It was a relief when Voldemort didn't kill the Muggle policeman. I thought the poor guy was a goner for sure.

The conversation between Lucius and Draco was perfectly done. Both of them make my flesh creep!

Poor Peter... you continue to portray him in a sympathetic manner. I wonder how he will be able to answer that most difficult of all questions?

Looking forward to your next chapter!

Reviewer: B. Nonymous to readersDate: 2002-12-03
Reviewid: 10995Chapter: 2
I hope y'all don't mind me talking back to you here.

Thanks for your support and kind comments. Feel free to point out anything I've missed, messed up, or dropped, also!

Ozma - Wollenstone started off as a throwaway, but I'm wondering if you're right in that he might deserve his own story. And thank Mrs. Nonymous for most of that R/Hr goodness! (And Night Zephyr for prodding me to expand that section.)

Lilac - You think THIS is a cliffhanger... ;) And chapter 3 is being submitted right after this post.

Rugi - I'm flattered w.r.t. the Harry reaction to Ginny. Yeah, he's thick. I was 16 once too, and probably more thick. (Same goes for Ron.)

Sabre - You ask the 10 million Galleon question. Hang around for the results.

Reviewer: SabreDate: 2002-12-02
Reviewid: 10914Chapter: 2
Yay! These are getting more and more intriguing as your Rowlingitis progresses ;) I'll be interested to see what tack you take on Pettigrew - reformed or still just all about his own skin. And the R/H teasing was done nicely!

Reviewer: RugiDate: 2002-12-02
Reviewid: 10869Chapter: 2
Oh! Still worried about poor Peter!

I really love how you managed to balance the humorous and sweet stuff with the worry about Peter's safety and Voldemort. Harry's reaction to Ginny's kiss was pure Rowling. It made me giggle. And I also loved all of the Ron and Hermione sweetness. Lovely.

Though of course you had to leave us with Harry feeling Voldemort and making the situation serious again!

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2002-12-01
Reviewid: 10841Chapter: 2
Well done! Wow, I'm really enjoying this story! This chapter had to tell a lot of background info for the story, but I'm glad to have it. Oh, NO! Voldy knows...what's going to happen now? Big cliffhanger there! Glad the next chapter will be up soon.

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2002-12-01
Reviewid: 10836Chapter: 2
I loved how Ron and Hermione tried so hard to get out of explaining their Patroni and how the truth was eventually 'forced' out of them. ;-) The general reaction was perfect. "Finally!" indeed! I also thought Neville's potion to treat the victims of Cruciatus was a very much in character.

Speaking of character, Professor Wollenstone is intriguing. I like the idea of a Lockhart-ish professor who's the genuine article. (Are we going to find out where Professor Snape has disappeared to?)

Eagerly awaiting the next chapter!

Reviewer: B. NonymousDate: 2002-11-22
Reviewid: 9797Chapter: 1
So glad to see comments from authors I dig! BTW, chapters 2 AND 3 are now in NZ's capable hands.

Rugi - You'll see a bit of Peter in Chapter 3, and I think you'll still be worrying.

Ozma - I've the whole backstory of the Parent's Kit, but I don't know if I'll be able to weave it in smoothly. Please watch for it and tell me if I smoothed it in enough. And someone _BETTER_ be watching out for the Grangers...

Sabre - I hope I don't disappoint.

A.L. - Voldie's just plain mad at this point. There's not really a mystery per se, I'm afraid. As for James, well, let's just say Moody can see father-son resemblances!

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2002-11-21
Reviewid: 9731Chapter: 1
This *is* an intriguing mystery you've set up! I wonder what Voldemort's up to, what he needs Hermione for, and what James must have done to warrant that comment from Moody. BTW, Moody is one of my favourite characters in fanon, essentially a half-OC since we didn't really meet him in canon. ;)

I'm so pleased you're continuing this! Looking forward to more of everything! :D

Reviewer: SabreDate: 2002-11-21
Reviewid: 9726Chapter: 1
Very promising...can't wait to see what happens next.

Reviewer: OzmaDate: 2002-11-21
Reviewid: 9709Chapter: 1
Poor kids!!! The harrowing description of what the trio had been through really got to me. The idea of a parents' kit to protect the Muggle parents of magical children is brilliant! It's good to know that the Grangers are being looked after. I hope that nothing will happen to them.

Oooh, I want to read more!!! Please post the next chapter soon!!!

Reviewer: RugiDate: 2002-11-21
Reviewid: 9690Chapter: 1
"Hogwarts students Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger were teetering between elation and exhaustion."

After and ordeal like theirs it would be hard to decide how you felt! I really like that you let us know they were safe and then told us what happened! It makes the reading about the emotions and less about the action. Nice.

I am really worried for poor Peter. Wow! I never thought I would ever seriously write that!

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