The Sugar Quill
Sugar Quill Community
- S.P.E.W (SQ History)

Fan Fiction and Writing
- Ask Madam Pince
(Story Submissions)
- Floo Network (Links)


Administrative Links

Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 106

Reviewer: AliviaDate: 2006-03-13
Reviewid: 140885Chapter: 3
That was really good! Was Kayleigh a witch?

Reviewer: Grim GirlDate: 2005-10-21
Reviewid: 134886Chapter: 9
Just the story i've been looking for
I been seaching for the ones 'bout
when harry was liitle and before hogwarts
thanx for your efforts to create this worderful story!
It was short and sweet and had a half hour entertainment!
if your thinking of writing a similar one you could do one with harry a bit smaller like 7-8 or
just ofter dumbledore dropped him off
Love~ The Grim

Reviewer: TamiDate: 2004-08-08
Reviewid: 96296Chapter: 9
Er... weird. A weird story. Not bad... just... weird.

Reviewer: AshleyDate: 2004-07-15
Reviewid: 92426Chapter: 9
I really liked your story!:)

Reviewer: PSSADate: 2004-05-30
Reviewid: 85299Chapter: 2
This story is soooo cute! So sweet that you made Gerald be nice to Harry!B.T.W., How old is Harry here,10? I'm used to him being 14. It's great to have a new type of story about Harry! Keep writing! You rule!

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69493Chapter: 9
That was a great ending!!!

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69492Chapter: 8
I'm tearing up now, though I knew it had to happen sometime. I became sort of attached to Kayleigh. I hate stupid Dudley, going to her funeral to get out of class! And her poem was so so sweet, but that last line killed me.

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69489Chapter: 7
Poor, poor Kayleigh! And poor Harry! I liked it when he screamed at Vernon, though...

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69485Chapter: 6
Nooo! I knew it had to be too good to be true! But, Kayleigh is so cute! Nooo!

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69482Chapter: 5
Hehehe! He does have his own gang! That was so great! And the fact that Kayleigh missed recess because she didn't hand in her math homework...just like me, I tell you!

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69480Chapter: 4
I am really liking this story! Kayleigh reminds me so much of myself! When Piers pulled that lighter out, I thought they were going to burn Harry for a second...this portrayal of Harry's life is exactly how I've always pictured it.

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69476Chapter: 3
Awwwww, chapter three was cute and sad as well! Poor Harry in the showers, and getting his glasses knocked off...Kayleigh is a nice girl!

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69473Chapter: 2
This second chapter was really really great! I liked Harry's art teacher and the painting he drew. It sort of reminds me of a story I wrote, where Harry and Ginny draw pictures of one another--their version of a princess/prince--when they're little. This was cute!

Reviewer: NatalieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69469Chapter: 1
I really liked this first chapter! I feel you've captured all of the characters very very well.

Reviewer: EmmaDate: 2004-01-10
Reviewid: 66421Chapter: 9
Awwwwwwww, you made me cry! Come back Kayleigh, come back!!!

Reviewer: Andrew WilsonDate: 2003-11-06
Reviewid: 59104Chapter: 1
I think that it was a good little short story that is very interesting.

Reviewer: LDate: 2003-11-06
Reviewid: 59052Chapter: 9
aw, loved the ending!!

Reviewer: Myster webDate: 2003-09-28
Reviewid: 54620Chapter: 9
This story was so sad but I loved it. Ms. JK never really goes into Harry's life before Hogwarts so I think it was really touching that you wrote this. May Kayleigh be happy beyond the rim of this world. (Sniff, sob, cry)

Reviewer: lindaDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52409Chapter: 9
really interesting. i hope there is more...

Reviewer: Nikki WeasleyDate: 2003-09-06
Reviewid: 51019Chapter: 9
OH MY GOD THAT IS BLOODY BRILLIANT! that was a great fanfic. it was really sad tho, i was crying! great job!! and pleese continue writing, your realllly good at it!! :)

Reviewer: RainydaieDate: 2003-09-06
Reviewid: 50935Chapter: 9
... wow. That is the best fanfic I've ever read. You really got the emotion going, there. I swear, I was crying from chapter five on. I just never Really thought about what Harry went through... We all know he was miserable, and everything, but - this is just great. Really great. Thanks.

Reviewer: holly96Date: 2003-08-27
Reviewid: 48937Chapter: 9
What a great story! Very detailed and interesting. Nice lead into book 1. Thanks so much for the entertainment!

Reviewer: brianaDate: 2003-08-26
Reviewid: 48758Chapter: 9
wow,... that's all i should say... really... wow...
lol... i think the story is really amazing... completely touching ... it's heartbreaking for our beloved hero.

Reviewer: PerlaDate: 2003-08-20
Reviewid: 47971Chapter: 9
Nice ending! I wish JK would write more about Harry before Hogwarts, but if she never does (wich is probably the case)at least now we have this wonderful story. Write more please!

Reviewer: Kate LynnDate: 2003-08-19
Reviewid: 47776Chapter: 9
Great story, definitely. You've done what I almost find impossible in fanfictions that I've read, and that is make a really believable Harry. Your writing style is also nice and tight, keeping me in the mood and setting you create.

Kayleigh - I really liked her, she was a nice person to see Harry interact with, and was interesting in her own right.

Oh, it was so sad when his friend died! But nicely handled.

Overall, I think you definitely did this piece and story justice. It was a nice plot, leading up to what he know of him and what happens in canon. Really enjoyable, though sad as heck at times. I look forward to reading more of your work. 8-)


Reviewer: IceDate: 2003-08-18
Reviewid: 47728Chapter: 9
awesome ending.

Reviewer: good jobDate: 2003-08-18
Reviewid: 47687Chapter: 9
nice story but wouldnt we hear about her if she was so important??

Reviewer: Margaret B.Date: 2003-08-18
Reviewid: 47671Chapter: 9
Wow....very sad ending, but not AS sad since we know what happens after the epilogue. I LOVE the ending of the epilogue, though...I think Harry was very In Character throughout the entire story. Great job...keep working on it. And please keep working on your Luna story, too, that's really good!

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2003-08-18
Reviewid: 47667Chapter: 9
This was an amazing fic! I really enjoyed it! Brilliant finish!

Reviewer: MonicaDate: 2003-08-18
Reviewid: 47595Chapter: 1
I really loved the ending.

Reviewer: TamaraDate: 2003-08-15
Reviewid: 47197Chapter: 8
Wow this is so moving i don't know what to say i just wander was she a witch or come from a family of wizards. She is amazing it made me cry so hard.

Reviewer: ArleneDate: 2003-08-14
Reviewid: 47144Chapter: 8
I really love this story!! It's soooo well written and I felt so heart broken when Kay died! I feel so bad for Harry, he finally made a best friend and then she went and died! How sad! Please update agian soon! Excellent work!!

~Arlene ~**~

Reviewer: LauraDate: 2003-08-14
Reviewid: 47063Chapter: 8

Reviewer: DJGDate: 2003-08-08
Reviewid: 46198Chapter: 7
Thats a good story. I read the whole thing (unless you're adding more chapters.) I hope you make it longer. You don't have to if you don't want to, but your a very good writer. This is a very good story.

Reviewer: SierraDate: 2003-08-06
Reviewid: 45868Chapter: 7
Write more!! that was reallygood Hurry and write more

Reviewer: PerlaDate: 2003-08-05
Reviewid: 45452Chapter: 7
This is a great story. I just have a few questions,
Well obviously Kayleigh knows about the magical world(duh)but, does that mean that she's a witch or a squib with magical relatives?
Is that the reason the Dursleys disliked her family so much?
Does she really have cancer? or does she have a magical desease and cancer is just a excuse that she made up?

Well, that's all. I really like your story and I'm enjoying reading it. Please write chapter 8 soon!

Reviewer: LauraDate: 2003-08-04
Reviewid: 45355Chapter: 7

Reviewer: amandaDate: 2003-08-04
Reviewid: 45288Chapter: 1
its really good so far plz continue

Reviewer: SkippyDate: 2003-08-04
Reviewid: 45271Chapter: 7
OMG! I love this fic! It's awesome, everything's perfect, besides Kay's illness- but the thing I really love is that the chapters aren't too short, but aren't too long, either-they're just the right length-WHAT A CLIFFHANGER!!! Please update soon!!!

Reviewer: RachDate: 2003-08-03
Reviewid: 45226Chapter: 7
I LUV this story! It's so creative! I luv te parts when Harry's all happy... it makes me feel all warm n fuzzy insdie... hehe
Keep up the fantastic work!

Reviewer: 'LissaDate: 2003-08-03
Reviewid: 45205Chapter: 7
Great! Write more.....

Reviewer: 'LissaDate: 2003-08-03
Reviewid: 45204Chapter: 7
Great! Write more.....

Reviewer: CristinaDate: 2003-08-03
Reviewid: 45189Chapter: 7
this story has me on the brink of tears... STUPID MUGGLES!!!!!!

Reviewer: IceDate: 2003-07-30
Reviewid: 44735Chapter: 7
MUGGLES!!! i love this story..more please!!! oh poor kay...

Reviewer: IceDate: 2003-07-30
Reviewid: 44734Chapter: 2
*grins* hehe love the painting.

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2003-07-30
Reviewid: 44673Chapter: 7
Brilliant chapter! I am glad you updated. Hope you do soon. This is getting very interesting and I love how Muggle is a "insult" Kay made up. :)

Reviewer: ANKITA SURIDate: 2003-07-30
Reviewid: 44619Chapter: 7
The story is good so far, but it doesn't match what happens in the books.

Reviewer: meDate: 2003-07-30
Reviewid: 44601Chapter: 7

Reviewer: SierraDate: 2003-07-27
Reviewid: 44156Chapter: 1
Hurry up and write more i'm impatient.I really do think your story is good and you should keep writing

Reviewer: SierraDate: 2003-07-19
Reviewid: 42929Chapter: 1
I think your story is really good write more quickly!!!!!!

Reviewer: SierraDate: 2003-07-14
Reviewid: 41918Chapter: 1
Write more Right now!!!!!!!!!!!

Reviewer: SierraDate: 2003-07-01
Reviewid: 39484Chapter: 1
Hurry up and write more i think it's a wonderful story

Reviewer: SierraDate: 2003-06-26
Reviewid: 38664Chapter: 1
Hurry up and write more!!! I'm dying all because of you ,don't you feel bad that you are causing someones death!

Reviewer: SierraDate: 2003-06-14
Reviewid: 36719Chapter: 6
I really like this story you,should write more right away

Reviewer: Margaret B.Date: 2003-06-08
Reviewid: 35840Chapter: 6
KAYLEIGH! I hope she's ok! Please let her be all right! I love the story! KEEP WRITING!

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2003-06-08
Reviewid: 35833Chapter: 6
I am glad you updated! Cancer.. that's so sad. I hope you update soon. I am looking forward to reading more.

Reviewer: AngelicaDate: 2003-04-16
Reviewid: 28210Chapter: 5
This is a great story so far, I can't wait to see the next chapters!

Reviewer: NightRainDate: 2003-04-16
Reviewid: 28203Chapter: 5
Well, what happened to Harry's gang by the time the first book started? He didn't have any friends then. And I think the book said that he'd never been able to make friends...everyone was too scared of Dudley. Out of canon, but still good. Kayleigh's cool.

Reviewer: lindsayDate: 2003-04-15
Reviewid: 28032Chapter: 5
awe, Kay kicks ass! Sniff, he finally has a friend!, please write more, please :)

Reviewer: ...Date: 2003-04-15
Reviewid: 28011Chapter: 5
Aww! Cuteness...I like Kayleigh, too. Question: how old are they supposed to be?

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2003-04-15
Reviewid: 27998Chapter: 5
This is amazing! It gets better everytime I read it! Please continue it soon.


Reviewer: SundanceDate: 2003-02-17
Reviewid: 20662Chapter: 4
I really like this story!!! :)

Reviewer: KieraDate: 2003-02-17
Reviewid: 20658Chapter: 4
Well, your story has a fairly interesting plotline so far, and the idea of it is actually pretty original, which is something you don't see so often anymore, but you really need to work on the grammar you have used in this story. The two things that I noticed the most were this. You NEVER left a space after commas used in a sentence. For examples, please see this sentence and the rest of this post. Also, when you have lines of dialog with no extaneous words added, like 'he said' or 'she asked' you need to leave an empty line in between the dialog given by different people. In this cahpter you seemed to have noticed this and put forth some effort to correct these mistakes, but perhaps before you post your chapters, you could proof read it, or get a beta (someone who will read over your stories, and hopefully catch any mistakes you have missed) Overall, good story, and something I would want to read to the end if you keep up with it and post regularly.

Reviewer: maniac magooDate: 2003-02-16
Reviewid: 20532Chapter: 4

Reviewer: megDate: 2003-02-16
Reviewid: 20531Chapter: 1
I do! I do! please continue!

Reviewer: fireboltDate: 2003-02-15
Reviewid: 20451Chapter: 4
Wow! This is great! It seems just like Harry's life would have been!

Reviewer: SuzyQDate: 2003-02-15
Reviewid: 20345Chapter: 4
Really cool!

Reviewer: SuzyQDate: 2003-02-15
Reviewid: 20344Chapter: 4
Really cool!

Reviewer: AngelDate: 2003-02-15
Reviewid: 20316Chapter: 4
Nice story. Feels a bit disjointed in places, but lots of good ideas. How old's harry meant to be?
Keep writing.

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2003-02-15
Reviewid: 20314Chapter: 4
Do add more! Please. I love this story. Especially the girl, Kay as Harry calls her.

Reviewer: LourdesDate: 2003-02-15
Reviewid: 20312Chapter: 4
You are so very brave to write this fanfic. It is so very sad and full of child abuse. Too real... maybe that is why JFK did not write a prequel to Hogwarts.

Reviewer: LizDate: 2003-02-15
Reviewid: 20309Chapter: 4
That was good... Is that the end??? Please say no...

Reviewer: RowennaDate: 2003-01-17
Reviewid: 16586Chapter: 3
Hey! i am totally enjoying this story!! it's quite good so far, and i'm not sure *exactly* where you're going, but it doesn't matter to me as long as you update!!

i also really liked the painting!

Reviewer: samiDate: 2003-01-14
Reviewid: 16186Chapter: 3

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2003-01-14
Reviewid: 16166Chapter: 3
Awesome. Hope you keep adding.

Reviewer: jessicaDate: 2003-01-01
Reviewid: 14718Chapter: 2
its a cool story are you going to right more that`d be great

Reviewer: JoDate: 2002-12-31
Reviewid: 14633Chapter: 2
Hi there. Very interesting idea. I'd be interested in reading more. Just a quick question - are these things happening before Harry's 11th birthday, or instead of his time at Hogwarts? Just so you know, the latter would KILL me! LOL!! He HAS to go to Hogwarts!! OK, I'll stop being bossy now. <G> Anyway, thanks, and I look forward to reading more. Jo

Reviewer: HannahDate: 2002-12-31
Reviewid: 14536Chapter: 1
I liked your story a lot. I imagined his life before hogwarts as you described it. Please write on!

Reviewer: HannahDate: 2002-12-31
Reviewid: 14533Chapter: 1
I liked your story a lot. I imagined his life before hogwarts as you described it. Please write on!

Reviewer: MatthewDate: 2002-12-30
Reviewid: 14519Chapter: 2
AWSOME!!!!!!!!! Please right more, you can take this story far!

Reviewer: PBS JonesDate: 2002-12-30
Reviewid: 14493Chapter: 2
I love stories about little Harry. This one is really cute, with some funny dialog between Harry and Dudley ("What are you looking at?" Not much." heh.) I'm curious as to where the story will go, and what kind of things will happen before the end.

I'd suggest double spacing between paragraphs and spacing after commas to make it easier to read.

Oh, and Harry's picture rox!

Reviewer: hpottergymnastDate: 2002-12-30
Reviewid: 14465Chapter: 2
Cool story. The teachers' names come from Monty Python. At least, that's my guess.

Reviewer: QuaffleDate: 2002-12-30
Reviewid: 14463Chapter: 1
This story rocks! It's welll written, and it has an excellent hook...I have the strange desire for Gerald's girlfriend to be Hermione.

Reviewer: RiddleDate: 2002-12-30
Reviewid: 14388Chapter: 2
This is really a cool seem to be experimenting a lot with things. The snitch, for example. Really interesting! Can't wait for chapter three :)

Reviewer: JennaDate: 2002-12-29
Reviewid: 14352Chapter: 2
I think they come from Hailey's Comet? Good story!

Reviewer: KätlinDate: 2002-12-29
Reviewid: 14331Chapter: 2
That is a good story!
Please continue!

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2002-12-28
Reviewid: 14265Chapter: 2
i hope this is continued! Thanks for writing it!

Reviewer: GinnyWPotterDate: 2002-12-28
Reviewid: 14245Chapter: 2
LOL, Gerald reminds me of me...chattery, talking about whatever randomness pops into his head...I like 'im. ^___^

Reviewer: TayloireDate: 2002-12-28
Reviewid: 14238Chapter: 2
This stroys pretty good so far. Keep at it. Oh and i have no idea about the teachers names but o well *Tayloire*

Reviewer: KalarienDate: 2002-12-21
Reviewid: 13501Chapter: 1
This is great stuff!! I really enjoy it. Please keep it going, this could be really great!

Reviewer: ValerieDate: 2002-12-20
Reviewid: 13476Chapter: 1
I DO I DO I DO!!!! This is so cute! I love pre-Hogwarts stories, and there certainly aren't enough of them! Good job so far!

Reviewer: Dark RosaleenDate: 2002-12-19
Reviewid: 13325Chapter: 1
Please keep going! Not only is this a good story, but your writing style is excellent. I think this is very promising...

Reviewer: AnjerlaDate: 2002-12-19
Reviewid: 13322Chapter: 1
*heads to the bandwagon...starts jumping up and down* I do! I do! Nasty teaser! Nasty, meeeeean teaser of a story! Not enough...continue!

Reviewer: CallieDate: 2002-12-19
Reviewid: 13311Chapter: 1
I want you to continue, this is great.

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2002-12-19
Reviewid: 13299Chapter: 1
In answer to your question "who wants me to continue?" I DO! PLEAZE!

Reviewer: RachDate: 2002-12-19
Reviewid: 13296Chapter: 1
Wow this is awesome! Well written and so realistic!
It probably would be exactly what Harry's life was like before Hogwarts. That Gerald kid is cool.Wonder who his girlfriend was????? hehehe!
This is really awesome! Can't wait for the next chapter!

Reviewer: GinnyDragon54Date: 2002-12-18
Reviewid: 13281Chapter: 1
"....who wants me to continue?" ME ME MEEEEEEEEEE! I wanna know what happens with Gerald.

Reviewer: ella weasleyDate: 2002-12-18
Reviewid: 13278Chapter: 1
*waves arms in the air and jumps up and down* oo! oo! i do! i do!

this looks very promising. the horrible treatment our poor harry suffers if very accurately and believably described in this. cant wait for more!

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2002-12-18
Reviewid: 13274Chapter: 1
Very good! Dudley was perfectly in character. I liked the bit about his stealing Harry's homework.

I hope you do another chapter, or two, or three...

Reviewer: BooklovrDate: 2002-12-18
Reviewid: 13270Chapter: 1
Hey, pretty neat. Like I said, I had an idea for a story like this, though it is different. (I'm guessing the same pattern, though: Harry's life SUX. Harry gets friends. Harry loses friends. Harry's life SUX. But that's an oversimplification anyway.) This is good, you should continue. Your Dursleys are nicely mean without being over the top, and I like your take on younger Harry. Just one thing: if Gerald is a year below Harry, and Harry's the year before Hogwarts, that puts him in the 9-10 age range. Should he have a girlfriend that young? But I'm sure you have reasoning behind that. Good luck!

The Sugar Quill was created by Zsenya and Arabella. For questions, please send us an Owl!

-- Powered by SQ3 : Coded by David : Design by James --