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Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Squib Summer
Review(s): 140

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-04-23
Reviewid: 142166Chapter: 10
No offence meant to your friend… but you write better by yourself.

Reviewer: JennDate: 2003-11-02
Reviewid: 58520Chapter: 10
Awesome story, but the author's notes are getting ridiculous! It's cool that you thank people for feedback, but the author's notes should not be longer than the chapter, no? :)

Reviewer: Cat FeralDate: 2003-06-28
Reviewid: 38784Chapter: 10
I've really enjoyed all your "Squib" tales but this one is special! I loved all the "dark" creatures rallying around Harry! I haven't yet read the fifth book and so I'm wondering how much of what's in here is from that -- Nagini taking on the half-woman form, for instance? (kinda' liked how they were all female now that I think of it.)

Most of us have a soft spot for the stories where members of the Wizarding World who assumed they knew about Harry come up against the reality of the Dursleys. You did it well! (I hope Argus tells Severus a little of what he's discovered. Whether it would change Sev's treatment of Harry any is another question, but it might give him pause. Or, if Mrs. Norris is involved, should that be "paws"?)

And the Argus/Minerva thing is surprisingly sweet. I never would have thought of a Filch/McGonagall ship as anything but "NO WAY!" but once again, ya' done good!

Reviewer: PiperDate: 2003-04-21
Reviewid: 28824Chapter: 10
Epilogue 1: Well done!! Loved the ending. Yes, the line between "us" and "them" is not always as clear as we believe it. Dudley's actions were a nice exclamation point to that.

I loved everything you did with the sphinx. From making her Dumbledore's friend to the book of riddles. You did a brilliant job with her. All the magical creatures were wonderful but she was my favorite.

Epilogue 2: Favorite line:

"Staying on a Harpy’s good side would be the most prudent thing to do."

Prudent, indeed.

Prologue 3: Brilliant. I love these creatures. I love how they refer to people using descriptive phrases like Grey Devourer, Grayling, the Breaker of Dark Wizards and the broken wizard instead of using their names. Nice closure to have them meet back at the Leaky Cauldron.

This was a very nice story. Well done, you two!!

Reviewer: PiperDate: 2003-04-21
Reviewid: 28822Chapter: 9
This chapter was quite a bit slower but you had some very good dialogue. I loved how you let Harry be shrewd in trying to hide the existence of his cloak from Snape. Good bit of characterization there.

Reviewer: PiperDate: 2003-04-21
Reviewid: 28813Chapter: 7
It appears I've gotten a few chapters behind...

Good job with Dumbledore!! I particularly liked this line:

"You're just as bad as Hagrid!"

"Thank you, Argus."

Good ending -- very intense. I think I actually felt a little sorry for the Grey Woman.

Reviewer: LizBeeDate: 2003-04-15
Reviewid: 27995Chapter: 10
Bah, I'm late in reviewing. But I loved, loved, loved this! Harry was, as always, perfect beyond words, and I'm going to be tied up for ages witht the riddle of the riddle book. I'm thinking of Snape, but I'm not sure...

Perhaps it will be answered in "Squib Guardian" -- I see the first chapter is up. Off to read.

Thank you for yet another lovely fic.

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-04-10
Reviewid: 27329Chapter: 10
So Dudley isn't a Dark creature after all? How nice. ;-)

Harry will get an A= on that essay, I'm sure-- if not for content or thought then for writing it so well.

Ha! Now Peeves gets to chew on a candle! I pity the owl that has to carry perfumed letters all the way from France.

And now back to the joke scene: A Sphinx, a Harpy, and a banshee all walk into a bar. Well, it looks like the anti-Voldy side has a few behind-the-scenes supporters. (IwantVoldytobechaseddownandcapturedinpublicbythosecreatures. That'll teach him! LOL!)

Looking forward to both your new fics, guys!

Until then,

~Dr. Monaco~ (And Whiskers, who brought in Morty the Great Plains skink the other day. And yes, he's still alive. :-) )

Reviewer: B. NonymousDate: 2003-04-10
Reviewid: 27315Chapter: 10
Oh my, I'm ahead at work, and the girls are sleeping... time to check out the 'quill!

What a wonderful story. You and J should team up again sometime, and when J's story hits, I'll be sure to read it (modulo work and babies, of course). Mrs. N. will be reading this after me, and even if she doesn't leave a comment, rest assured she will like it as much as I.

And Ozma - glad to hear you've another story up your sleeve for us! It almost makes me want to ignore my "not until Book Five" moratorium... ;)

Reviewer: PinpointDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27272Chapter: 10
I think it's brilliant. You've managed to capture Harry's self-pity/guilt/courage wonderfully, better than most other authors. And you've made Filch into a remarkable character. Well done! And I hope to see more of the predators in the future!

Reviewer: shellebelleDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27219Chapter: 10
"she really is most sincerely dead." LOL! Good one!

Reviewer: KarieDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27182Chapter: 10
What a great ending, in every way.

Reviewer: kazzaDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27179Chapter: 10
Lovely epilogues. I especially liked the Dudley one - you showed his potential so well.
This has been a wonderful addition to an excellent series. Bravo!

Reviewer: SunsethillDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27173Chapter: 10
Very nice ending. Each section had such a distinctive and effective feeling to it. I really like the idea of Harry and Dudley eventually calling a truce. And I can't wait for the epilogue with Ginny!

Reviewer: jessanndiDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27166Chapter: 10
I love the title.

It's great to see Dudley being defiant.

Can't wait for all these characters to appear in later tales.

Reviewer: JestanaDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27160Chapter: 10
*applauds* Wonderful story, both of you. I loved the different epilogues. Really gives you insight into the characters and how this 'story' has affected them. Bravo!

Reviewer: RichardDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27149Chapter: 10
I meant to mention after the last chapter that, while I know exactly what you were referring to with the wax gag - all I could think of were the enormous wax lips I used to get as a child - big pouty red lips with that slightly minty flavour redolent of birch beer.

Once again, a very satisfying chapter. I like the subtel shift in Dudley. There was a song in South Pacific about having to be taught how to hate...carefully taught. Dudley was certain taught - but as he is maturing, he is growing into his own person (even if he is outgrowing his clothing!) Congrats on handling it well.

Congrats also to Ozma for overcoming the block!!!! You GO gurl!!!!

Reviewer: JOdelDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27144Chapter: 10
VERY fine fic.

One niggle. This time round I snagged at the comment that
Tom the barkeeper "hadn't gone to Hogwarts".

How do you figure that?

Hogwarts is apparantly a no-fee school, it has custody
of the charmed quill that records ALL magical births
in Great Britain and Ireland, and Minerva McGonagall sends a
Hogwarts letter to EVERYONE who is turning 11 in time
for that school year. Is Tom from the Continent? (He
isn't a Squib, since in canon he can light fires magically.)
If he is a qualified wizard he *must* have at least gone
through school far enough to take the OWLs or he wouldn't
be allowed to use a wand.

Rowling has stated that Hogwarts is the ONLY magical training
Academy in Britain, and if the quill records everyone,
and Minerva sends everyone a letter, If Tom is not
an immigrant, is he a Muggle-born whose family would not
permit him to attend (and qualify through the KwikSpell
correspondence course after he was of age)?

Or do you mean that he did not *finish* Hogwarts or
sit the NEWTs? It is probably legal for a student to
leave school after the OWLs - particularly if he has
a job lined up. The reasonable restrictions on under
age magic still applies until they reach legal age.
But thse restrictions are probably very lax inside
the wizarding world itself.

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27140Chapter: 10
The epilogues were wonderful! I am a real sucker for Harry-Dudley sort-of-friendship moments and the first epilogue did not disappoint. It was sweet of Dudley to admit he was afraid Harry was going to die -- it made me remember the time I was really sick and my cousin (we lived in the same house and grew up together) cried because she thought I was going to die, too. Our relationship wasn't as bad as Harry and Dudley's, tho :)

Hee, Hagrid receiving perfumed letters from the *mysterious* O.M.! I'm sure he keeps them under his pillow to sweeten his dreams! LOL :D (Filch's letter would probably smell like Mrs. Skower's tho -- but then he's a sweetheart so I'm sure Minerva wouldn't mind.) I enjoyed the mention of Sirius' idea to get Myrtle to redecorate her bathroom. I think the depressing purple and pale green would work.

Finally, I loved how the Harpy & Co. felt drawn to Harry. (And I am not surprised that Hagrid was the Harpy's friend!)

I am really looking forward to the Ginny story!

Reviewer: LCDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27122Chapter: 10
One, thanks for the drinks recipes. I keep looking for ones I like, so I'll definitely try these... (EG) Two, good closure. Well, closure to yet another story in your delightful series. Did I mention I love these now? Three, wow, a compliment on my email addy... uh, it's Sailor Moon style, favorite rock/ spice mutilation. Don't ask. I was young and foolish. Four, yes I have, and I do believe I decided to go with a can of some sort of Starbucks power drink that's shelved with the Red Bull and Amp and such....
I love how the monsters toast Harry in the end. And their name for him. He collects names the way I collect epitaphs, doesn't he? Boy Who Lived. Foolish Gryffindor. Breaker of Dark Wizards. Yada yada.... heheh. Thank you, once again, for posting a loverly story.
Oh yeah, and this gas station attendant thanks you, Jelsemium, for your comment on hating people who abuse the service folks. I actually had a rude customer call back and apologize! The whole staff's still in shock over that... an apology? Jeesh! The world must be ending....

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27119Chapter: 10
<<<Authors’ Notes:

But Wait! There’s More...

Jelsemium has written a sequel/epilogue featuring Ginny!

It’s called "Taste Test."

Coming Soon, to Jelsemium’s author page! --Ozma>>>

Tee hee...I got so excited during that part where Harry was recalling the dream of Ginny kissing him, and even more excited thinking that OZMA had written a bit of H/G, perhaps because of my request ever so long ago...but alas...I figured out that must have been Jelsemium writing that part, not Ozma. Darn...but we'll convert you some day, Ozma...oh yes, we will...
*laughs maniacally*

Oh, where was I? Ah, yes...just a well-done story/collaboration between the two of you wonderful writers! Sorry my reviews have been KISS (kept it short, sweety)and I've missed reviewing a chapter before the next one came up. Please know it wasn't because I didn't like that chapter...I love them. All of them. So there! Just haven't felt like being too specific lately...weird, huh?'s laziness, really...but thanks for collaborating on a throughly entertaining story!

Reviewer: Murasaki99Date: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27112Chapter: 10
Oh, I LOVED Harry's reply to Petunia's 'greeting' - he's going to be a very fine man someday!

'Surely she wouldn't have done something like that in a room full of her family, not to mention Filch! Shy little Ginny? It must have been a dream, mustn't it?' Oooh, let us hope not!! *sproings happily* Love the thought!

A riddle book from the sphinx! Read anything Hypatia sends you, Harry! :-0

Loved all the gifts and friendship calls - loved Harry's rewrite of his essay, and especially loved this: 'There was a long pause. Then Harry moved back and let Dudley come in. Yes, the line between 'Us' and 'Them' can shift unexpectedly. ' Yay Dudley!! I do like the idea that he might be redeemable given a chance! Wee-hah!

Loved Argus' letter to Minerva - and his fixing the note concerning Sirius! LOL!

OOh, Hagrid knows Celaeno the harpy? THE Celaeno from "The Last Unicorn" fame?? Best to stay on her good side, indeed!

I do hope Argus gets his chance to help/encourage Harry, he certainly doesn't get much help at home!

Loved the bar scene with everyone drinking and deciding that yup, they had to help Harry! hee-hee! Why do I hear echoes of Han Solo from that lot? Thanks to for the recipies - the beer/whiskey/lemonade I'll pass on, but the whiskey milk and the banshee sound tasty!

LOL - I'm sure Imprudential is a cross-dimensional company! Aragorn, Frodo, and Eowyn have got to be charter members (along with all the Noldor)! I wonder if Albus is covering Harry's premiums? :-D

Thank you again both of you for a great tale, I'll be checking Jelsemium's pages for her stuff now, too! So glad to hear the writer's block is gone! I'll send any sunbeams Greymalkin can't catch your way!

Reviewer: PortiaDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27108Chapter: 10
First of all, I'm definitely trying those drinks, underage or not ;).

<<"They wouldn’t dream of depriving you of the pleasure of my company," Harry had said with as much dignity as he could muster before sending himself to his room.>>
Love how you have Harry's wry sense of humor showing itself.

<<"The second most import thing in Defense Against the Dark Arts is knowing who your enemies are. The first is knowing who your friends are. It’s too easy to classify people and other beings as ‘Us’ and ‘Them’.

"However, the line between ‘Us’ and ‘Them’ can shift abruptly. So-called dark creatures can show themselves to be sympathetic, even heroic, while some humans can prove to have less humanity in them than a sphinx, or a banshee, or a harpy…" Harry paused, then added. "…Or a werewolf, or a giant.">>
Or a Squib, or a Dursley :P. This is lovely, and ties right in with the lessons shown in canon.

I'm waiting eagerly for the sequel!

Reviewer: gwyn ap rhysDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27075Chapter: 10

I wanted to say how much I enjoyed this fic. I have read many of Ozma's fics in the past, at, and was pleased to find this collaboration was just as good. Thanks guys.

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2003-04-09
Reviewid: 27071Chapter: 10
[the hospital staff was probably bewildered at his gratitude for that.]- Aw. Poor Harry! He's probably the only kid in the world that likes being sick and staying in a hospital.

The purple scarf for Filtch was sweet. Love Filtch's fondness for the mouth guards! Detention just got a lot more interesting!

That was a nice ending for Dudley. I love Redeemed!Dudley!
It was also great seeing the Predators have more of a soul (love the card from the harpy and Hagrid *would* be on friendly terms with her!). An excellent ending and I *love* the drinks! Looking forward to reading "Taste Test"!

BTW- I just love your disclaimers! I forgot to mention that earlier! And I love how you stuck with the bed themem throughout.

Reviewer: LizBeeDate: 2003-04-06
Reviewid: 26619Chapter: 9
"Voldemort's right hand rat" is officially my new favourite phrase. It just sounds so ... right.

Another lovely chapter. I like the rapport growing between Filch and Harry -- borrowing the Cloak indeed!

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-04-06
Reviewid: 26599Chapter: 9
Aww, Harry-n-Filch bonding! How sweet! I'm glad Filch saw how brave poor Harry has to be and how strong his sense of responsibility is :) I also liked how Harry managed to inject a little humor into the situation ("I'll let you borrow it...", "Voldemort's right hand rat"). I loved the ending, though, when Filch is about to begin telling Harry about his parents. What a wonderful thing to do for him.

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26554Chapter: 9
[I'll go down in "Hogwarts: A History" as the only person to get detention during detention!"] You capture Harry so well!
No matter what the situation, he's able to come up with a witty, off-the cuff remark. It's sweet to see Filtch and Harry bond a bit.

[but it also kept you from spouting nonsense.] Awww, gruff Filtch. He's just the right amount of cantankerous and caring!

[He'd rather chew his lip to bloody ribbons than anger them. And I was no better than they were. No wonder he looked at me like that.] Excellent way of making Filtch reflect on his image at Hogwarts. We're not often aware of the influence we exert over others. We can get so wrapped up being the center of our own little worlds that we forget to take a look outside ourselves to see how we are affecting others and those few lines really show the sobering realization Filtch has about himself--and about Harry.

[Sometimes you tell me when I've done a good job," Potter offered. "Aunt Petunia never does."] Oh, that line is so heartbreaking! It also shows Harry's honesty and a bit of how tactful he can be, considering he never really had much training in politeness.

The conversation between Filtch and Harry about his father was great, especially the exploding toilet. It's nice to see Filch's heart. Poor Filtch. It always makes me mad at how people mistreat those that work in the service industry, especially young people. Nothing used to irk me more in college than people who would leave their lunch trash all over the student union, as if the janitors were their own personal maids and butlers. It makes sense that Filtch would have a healthy amount of annoyence at the children for making a mess of the castle, whether intentional or not. Add in Peeves and the fact that Filtch is a Squib, well...I'm surprised more people aren't hanging upside down in the dungeons.

I also liked how Harry explained to Filtch about his role in defeating the DArk Lord. The theme of being "in bed" and it not always being a safe place was an excellent paragraph it it really illustrated the point of how no place is ever safe from evil.

Excellent story! More chapters...please?

Reviewer: LCDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26539Chapter: 9
Mmm... leaving a review when I've only just woke up. Yum. This is a really great chapter. Kinda like my brother trying to dig himself out of the hole, and only getting deeper. (ie social dynamics good!) Now, excuse me, while I go off to find my caffiene. What shall it be today? tea, coffee, Mountain Dew Code Red, or Jolt cola? Hrm.... Jolt!

Reviewer: Murasaki99Date: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26518Chapter: 9
Oh goodie, another chapter!! And some epilogs to come? I'm happy! :-) I tried reviewing this last night and I could NOT stay online, my ISP kept dropping me off... must've been Voldemort. :-0

"Oh, it just figures, I'll go down in "Hogwarts: A History" as the only person to get detention during detention!" - alas for Harry, I'm sure he'll go down in HaH eventually, may it be for something so minor, but I doubt it.

I'm so glad Harry and Argus got a chance to talk in peace finally - it's about time! Especially considering the two of them seem able to find trouble on a cloudless day, it would be a good thing for them to stick together more or less.

Ah, wax to protect your teeth - I remember the sticky kind to cover braces all too well. Ick. A good idea though, or Harry is going to end up with his teeth prematurely ground down.

I do hope Argus doesn't spill the beans to Snape too quickly... I'm sure Harry doesn't think that Snape could get any worse toward him, BUT... And I think Argus is right to worry over Severus' reaction as regarding Dumbledore's complicity. I hope Argus holds his peace for a good long time.

'Can you wait until later in the term, when he's in a particularly foul mood and off on one of his usual rants about me... then you can just casually throw in that you know about the cloak? It might be amusing..." Of course, it could get Filch turned into a toad, Harry realized.' Hee-hee, but it might be worth it (at least if someone was nearby to cast the reversal spell later!).

'Harry's green eyes looked haunted, old and weary. I'd seen that look before, not so long ago, on another troubled young face. Who...? Oh. It had been Severus. So determined to protect the Stone. All alone if necessary.' - loved this, too. Very nicely done, that comparison!

I invented "Imprudential Insurance" way back when Stars Wars ep. 4 came out. Feel free to use or abuse. :-D

Thank you both of you for the great story - Ozma I hope your writer's block is abating??

Off to conjure sunbeams for Greymalkin.

Reviewer: StephanieDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26482Chapter: 9
LoL I wounder what that sketch looks like of Filch.

Reviewer: kazzaDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26477Chapter: 9
Filch would make a sweet Uncle.
Lovely chapter

Reviewer: RichardDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26444Chapter: 9
Wonderful chapter! I know that this is the hardest type to write sometimes - two character dialogues - keeping a flow, getting serious matters handled without slipping into maudlin mode, knowing when and how to lift the mood - well done all around!

I understand and agree with Filch's refusal of the attempted bribe - but theoretically shouldn't he give the cloak a try? Once he'd gotten a first-hand 'sense' of its magic, then invisibility cloaks would be useless against him, no? He might not be able to see someone using one, but he could pinpoint them pretty accurately.

I also like that this chapter was back exclusively to Filch's POV - I had gotten pretty used to it from the previous stories, and it is fun to read a well-written fiction when it's not author-omnipotens.

Hooray for more Squib stories! Ozma, you are very fortunate to have Jelsemium to help stir the creative juices - but, perhaps, not as fortunate as those of us who have become addicted to these stories!

Reviewer: KarieDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26425Chapter: 9
Verrry interesting discussion about whether Filch would tell Snape about the cloak. Attempting to bribe him was genius (: And I bet Filch's stories about James and company have a, hrm, unique slant (;

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26418Chapter: 9
Here, Harry, chew on a candle.

I suppose the wax thing was so that he wouldn't bite himself again, right?

"Potter had a sober expression on his face. 'I understand, Mr. Filch. You have to do your job. I just hope you understand MY position. I'd love to not be involved, but the Dark Lord has other ideas. I was in bed when my parents were killed. I was in bed when Sirius Black broke into Gryffindor Tower. I slept in the same room as Voldemort’s right hand rat for almost three years. And, no disrespect intended, but there weren’t any teachers around when Quirrel went after the Philosopher’s Stone. Can you imagine what would have happened to me if I had stayed in bed and let Voldemort be reborn when Wormtail was living in the same dorm as I was? What could have happened to Ron and the others?'"

-- Potter makes a point. Puts into perspective just how much trouble he attracts. He's like a durned magnet for it!

"'You wouldn't be lying to him, Mr. Filch!' Potter said. 'Withholding information is different. After the Professor finishes gloating, he'll want to know why you won't confiscate my cloak. Will you tell him that Professor Dumbledore wants me to have it? It's not safe to make Professor Snape angry.'"

-- Sounds logical to me! ;-)

So Aunt Petunia is more picky about cleaning than Filch is. Why doesn't that surprise me? (She probably wouldn't be so strict if it was Dudley doing the dishes rather than Harry.)

This has been a great read, guys! Ozma, I hope you get over the writer's block soon. And Jelsemium, I look forward to seeing mre of your work, too.

Until the epilogue,

~Dr. Monaco~ (With Whiskers, who has also enjoyed this fic, since she is a fan of Mrs. Norris'.)

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26343Chapter: 9
How sweet! It looks like the beginning of a beautiful friendship! I'm interested to find out what stories Filch tells Harry about his parents, so I'll be looking forward to the epilogue!

Reviewer: PortiaDate: 2003-04-05
Reviewid: 26311Chapter: 9
"I didn't fall asleep during detention, did I? No? I did, didn't I? What's the penalty for that?" He drew his knees up and buried his head in his arms. "Oh, it just figures, I'll go down in "Hogwarts: A History" as the only person to get detention during detention!"

I love the interactions between Filch and Harry--very touching, and also very realistic given what we know of the characters.

Reviewer: SunsethillDate: 2003-03-31
Reviewid: 25867Chapter: 5
I tried to add this review several days ago, and the board wouldn't allow me to actually post it, so sorry it's a little late.

<<"I should be sorry, boy. You're the only one besides me and the house-elves who knows to dust all the way to the edges of things. You always move the furniture when you sweep the floor. You polish the backs of the trophies without being told. And I never thought about it. I never wondered why.">>

I thought this was a wonderfully accurate detail. As the mother of six, I know that children (boys, especially) don't naturally clean as well as Filch describes Harry as cleaning--therefore, it is good to assume that his life has not been a bed of roses. Right after I read this, as proof, I asked my son to mop the bathroom floor, and I can assure you the corners were not clean! ;-)

Your collaboration on this story has been creepily fun. I really love Dumbledore knowing the Sphinx as a friend. Good work.

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-03-31
Reviewid: 25823Chapter: 8

That... that curse he used... OMG. Creepy. Scary- no, terrifying! I almost feel sorry for the Greyling.

And he was testing it out so that he could use it on Harry? And Harry had to *see* it... Well, if he didn't have nightmares about the Third Task, he will definitely have nightmares about this!

And now Dumbledore is hinting that he might not survive this war with Voldemort! Oh, no...

Well, at least Harry won't be alone with the Dursley's... the neighborhood "strays" will be there to watch over him. (Can someone please tell him that so that he might not feel so miserable?)

"The boy’s alive, which makes you far luckier than you realize, you contemptible, miserly, stingy, shallow-minded cow!"

-- A touch of humor in a dark chapter. Take that, Pet-tuna! (Misspelling intended.)

Until next (hopefully not as depressing) chapter,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: LCDate: 2003-03-31
Reviewid: 25820Chapter: 8
Alright, alright. I'm sorry. I've read all your stories straight through, and now I'm feeling guilty. Wonderful reads. I don't know why I've passed them by before now. They are enchanting. I did disturb my poor pets with the laughter and shrieks of delight at some points. Many points, too be honest.
My question is, will the Harpy and Hypatia, and the ban sidhe show up again?
(I'm with Hagrid - more is better. Why have one dog, when you can have four? Why have just dogs, when you can have a cat? Why have just furry creatures, when you can have parakeets? Why have nice creatures, when you can have a black rat snake to scare the bejeebers out of your friends with? Of course, they're all dirty rotten traitors, deciding Dad's much more fun than I am. Must be he's got snacks, hmm?)

Reviewer: Mary AnneDate: 2003-03-31
Reviewid: 25812Chapter: 8
Well, as a librarian, I just have to love Hypatia. 8-)

As for what happened to the Gray Woman . . . eeeeuuuwwwww! Of course, my imagination had already been working overtime wondering, so it was almost a relief to actually have some details. Almost. And poor Harry, to know that could have been for *him*.

Filch's response to the Invisibility Cloak is pitch-perfect. And oh, what a glorious torrent of invective against Petunia! Atta boy, Argus!

Re: the explanations about Nagini in our last exchange of comments. I couldn't help smiling over that because I remember Nagaina from Kipling's *Rikki-Tikki-Tavi* and what he said after he'd killed Nag, the King Cobra: "Now I have Nagaina to deal with, and she'll be worse than five Nags . . ." And it was Kipling, too, who wrote that "the female of the species is more deadly than the male." Could that have been on your minds in this story? ;-) I mean, we have the Banshee and the Gray Woman and the Sphinx and the Harpy--I mean, how many more deadly females could we ask for without bringing in Emma Peel? *grin* Looking forward to the next chapter, but sad because it'll be the end of this story. However, I do want to hear the riddle!

Reviewer: pogoniaDate: 2003-03-31
Reviewid: 25800Chapter: 8
Oh! Well done! And I shall add the Sphinx, to Dumbledore's list of interesting and ancient friends. (The librarian's parents chose her name well).
My favorite parts were Filch's two unsuccessful protests to Dumbledore - with completely different emotional tones. Just loved the line "Trying to ignore the answer I could hear behind the sadness in Dumbledore's voice...". And Filch's insult to Aunt Petunia - I don't think I've ever heard him go on at such length before! I don't want to think about the Grey Woman's fate, nor about the next test subject (lab rat?) for Voldemort's new curse. Ugh, creepy.

Staying tuned for chapter 8... Keep up the wonderful work!

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-03-31
Reviewid: 25799Chapter: 8
Gah! *shudder* The Grey Stalker sure came to a grisly end. She deserved to be punished for what she did, but I don't know if it had to come to THAT. (Well, Voldemort isn't exactly known for his compassion...)

Meanwhile, re: Filch telling Petunia off -- Muahahahaha!!! She had it coming, too, and unlike what befell the Grey Stalker, I think Filch was too easy on her.

And one more thing -- I'm definitely not pointing this out as a fanfic cliche, but Dumbledore does love to have his "explanation scenes" in the hospital, doesn't he? I reckon he needs a captive audience for the Sphinx riddles he likes to tell afterwards! LOL

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25781Chapter: 8
[He seemed more worried about having disturbed people than his lacerated lip.] Awww, that image is so heartbreaking. Very Harry and it's good for Dumbledore and Filtch to see Harry's nature as compared to the Durstley's.

That spell Voldemort used on the Gray Woman asounds absolutely horriffic and Harry's reaction to it was so brave.

The Dumbledore/Argus interaction was perfect. Very true to canon. You've caught both Dumbledore's "twinkle" as well as his deep wisdom and sense of awesome power and responsibility. And the last line was great!!!

P.S.-Love the plethora of 'Puffs! Nice to see them in a fic!

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25779Chapter: 7
[It's hard to look bloodthirsty and bewildered at the same time.] What a great line! What an exciting escape! It's great to see Filtch in action! I can just picture him swinging that chain! (he's really into chains and mamacles...isn't he?)

[a stack of forms, large enough to impress even me.] Hehehe! I love when Filtch is self-aware! First person Filtch is great! Fascinating relationships between the humans and the wizards. I particularly liked ALbus's comments about the sphynx knowing some good riddles!

Reviewer: JestanaDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25776Chapter: 8
Excellent! Poor Harry and his nightmares. He needs someone to be there for him. *cough*Ginny*cough* I like the explanation Dumbledore gives Filch. An Invisibilty Cloak in the hands of someone like Harry is an asset. In the hands of someone like Draco... *shudder* Heeee! I was right! Woot! It only took me six chapters to figure that out. LOL.

Reviewer: JessanndiDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25769Chapter: 8
Another great chapter, poor Harry he has too many burdens on his shoulders and doesn't appreciate that people like Filch and Snape want to help him in their own perculiar ways.

Reviewer: KarieDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25738Chapter: 8
"Allowing him to keep that cloak is worse than irresponsible. No student should have such a thing. How can we protect him if we can't even see what he’s up to?" How perfect is that! Everything was great. Filch's reactions were so IC (: I'm so addicted to this story...

Reviewer: Murasaki99Date: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25729Chapter: 8
Oh dear, poor Harry! It's not fun to realize your enemy is saving up the really bad curses for YOU! Ugh. I can't exactly say I'm 'sorry' for the Grey Woman, except that no creature should die by torture. Very nicely done scene, just enough detail to let us know things were Not Good.

'Presumably, he meant a specific tabby cat and a particular large black dog. Black and Minerva might not be Harry Potter's blood kin. But his godfather and his Head of House were his family too.' - Yes, yes, yes!! Exactly so!! That realization is perfect.

I'm so glad everyone is getting a little rest at St. Mungo's. It makes sense to me that most of the staff are Hufflepuffs (altho I could see a Ravenclaw or two who were specialists in certain difficult fields of medicine.) Glad Argus finally got patched up too! Goodness the poor man is as bad as Severus (in both our stories) for walking out his door and finding trouble that lands him in hospital. "My life insurance company? Imprudential of course, why?" :-D

Greymalkin likes your story too this morning! He keeps hopping up and staring at the screen. Must be the sphinx!

Thanks both of you for the great chapter - always inspires me to write! Chapt. 15 is coming along nicely.

Reviewer: kazzaDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25704Chapter: 8
Oh this was a Good chapter. I like the exploration of Filch & Dumbledore's honest friendship; I'm not sure which one of them is confiding the most with the other.
Albus' reaction to Harry's night-terrors was very true to his character.

Reviewer: LizBeeDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25685Chapter: 8
The last exchange between Dumbledore and Filch gave me chills: it felt very real, very much like something from the books, yet dreadfully foreboding. I hate to think what you two have in store for poor Albus...

Yet the final line was equally perfect, and brought a smile to my face.

Reviewer: RichardDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25676Chapter: 8
I can't tell you how glad I am that you manage to update quickly - but seeing as how this is chapter seven of eight - I hope you have another fiction at the gate, raring to go!

Thank you so much for your worthy apologetics for Harry having the Invisibility Cloak - nowhere in all the explanation did Albus go for the "plus, it was his poor, dead daddy's..." It was very in character - Dumbledore might acknowledge that the cloak would have an emotional value to Harry - but he would never allow sentimentality to outweigh practicality.

Please keep the squib series going! It really has redefined how I see Filch - even to the point that I rewrote some of my own fiction slightly - out of respect for the old fella.

Reviewer: PortiaDate: 2003-03-30
Reviewid: 25657Chapter: 8
<<"Professor?" he managed weakly. "Was I screaming then? Did I wake everybody up?" He seemed more worried about having disturbed people than his lacerated lip.

"No, Harry," Dumbledore said calmly. "In fact, you seem to have injured yourself in your attempts to not scream." >>

How typical of Harry. Poor thing.

<<"Well, he saved me as much as the other way around," I said. "He's a good boy, really. At heart, I mean. Don't tell him I said so. On second thought, Headmaster, do tell him. He needs to be told such things. Merlin knows, he probably never hears anything good about himself from those…" >>
How typical of Filch, as well! Still a crusty old curmudgeon, but a kind one at heart.

<<‘contemptible, miserly, stingy and shallow-minded cow’>>
Our favorite Squib is quite eloquent when he's mad, isn't he?

The end of the chapter is very foreboding! I want to hear the riddle now!

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-03-27
Reviewid: 25436Chapter: 7
And they're out! I had a feeling the sphinx would help them.

OK, so now Harry is at St. Mungo's-- barely conscious-- and he's having one of his visions of Voldy.

"You promised that which you could not deliver. Now Potter is out of my reach once more. If you had come to me directly, I would have had him."

-- Does that mean the Grey Freak was working for Voldy after all? Or that they at least had "an agreement?"

(It wasn't until much, much later that he realized Filch had been insulting him. He didn't have time right then to think about it.)

-- LOL!

Well, until next update,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: KarieDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25366Chapter: 7
Eep! Harry's still in danger! I loved Harry's plan (; And Stan always makes me laugh--Neville!Harry, lol. Hypatia is a WONDERFUL name for a Sphinx. The starkness of Harry's description of the Grey Woman's ending made it very, very creepy without a single detail, but Harry...poor Harry. And Filch's exchange with Prof. Dumbledore was (:

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25360Chapter: 7
Your switch from Filch's first person to third person and then back again is a bit odd.

"But you look like the eighth day of a week-long detention!"

She and I share a fondness for tenpin bowling and chamber music. And she knows some truly delightful riddles

Reviewer: Persephone_KoreDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25350Chapter: 7
I love this story. I think I've mentioned that before, at some point, but I'm pretty sure I didn't notice this before....

How does a sphinx *bowl*? Really flexible paws?

I wonder just what Voldemort's doing to the Grey Devourer.... Poor Harry, first she tries to eat him and then he gets stuck with Voldemort's punishing her. ...Well, at least he got away and gets to wake up. ;)

"Technically, she sent a falcon." <snickers> :)

The whole thing with the Knight Bus -- Hypatia bringing it and Stan's "bewildering" insistence on calling Harry Neville -- was delightful.

Stray comments on review responses: Hypatia not being "safe" reminds me of Aslan. And as for talking to snakes, I wonder if the more magical a snake is, the more susceptible it is to control by Parselmouth? It's hard to tell with the basilisk (it didn't listen to Tom at the end, but how many people could YOU listen to with your eyes picked out by a phoenix? Ow!) and Harry didn't try. But Harry talked to the boa essentially as if it was an equal -- perhaps this was just circumstance, but the boa's attitude suggests that too -- whereas the Serpensortia-conjured snake was instantly and completely docile as soon as he hissed. (Of course, he didn't tell the boa to do anything, really.... and then Nagini's another question, and Voldemort orders everybody around....)

Reviewer: KazzaDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25328Chapter: 7
"Goodness, no. It would ruin a most rewarding friendship." - so very, very Dumbledore.
I liked how you picked up on the Dark isn't always Evil and Light isn't always Good ideas with the escape.
I think Stan and Argus could become friends as both have a similar pragmatic view of life; although Argus's self-criticism appears to be harsher than Stan's (from the little we know)

Reviewer: StephanieDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25322Chapter: 7
ohh very good :).

I shuddered. "Headmaster," I said, "You're just as bad as Hagrid!"
"Thank you, Argus." Dumbledore looked up and smiled at me in weary amusement before returning to Potter's forms.

haha i couldnt stop laughing.

Reviewer: LizBeeDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25313Chapter: 7
Another fine chapter, as always. I think my favourite part was the mention of Dumbledore's friendship with the Sphinx, but the dialogue between the Dursleys ("Is Potter going to die?" "I should be so lucky") and the true allegiance of the Harpy came in close second and third respectively. And your cliffhanger was as painful as ever.

Reviewer: julieDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25298Chapter: 7
once again great story. I had a feeling the Sphinx would be on Harry's side. I like the common response, go to a hospital. Please, I hope somebody tells Petunia off.

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25286Chapter: 7
*is absolutely wrung out* I am so glad they got away! It was really KEWL to have the Harpy and the Sphinx turn out to have an interest in keeping Harry safe. (I can't speak for the Banshee since she left early.) I was really surprised to hear Filch say "Go, Gryffindor!" -- at first I thought he was cheering for the House or something o.O Hee!

Hurray, Dumbledore is on the scene! Things should be OK (for now) from here on out, then :) I loved his being friends with the Sphinx. I never noticed that he had Hagrid-like tendencies to be on good terms with all sorts of beings! (Between the two of them, they might just be able to get most of the fantastic creatures and beings allied with the Light Side -- that should be a very exotic final battle against Voldemort.)

I was also surprised to read that the Dursleys were in St. Mungo's. Pleasepleaseplease let us know who was that speaking in acidic tones -- I hope it was Mrs. Weasley or Professor McGonagall or Filch telling Petunia off for being so heartless!

Reviewer: Murasaki99Date: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25278Chapter: 7
Hey, we're in sync today! We both got new chapters uploaded! What could be better? :-)

*Phew!* SO glad Harry and Argus got out of the noisome dungeon at least! Heh, why did I know the slithery things couldn't bear light? There's a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon where Calvin switches on the bedroom light screaming, "Shrivel and die you bloodsucking freaks of nature!!" I could just see Harry doing that! :-D I also liked Argus' foresight in taking the chain as a defensive weapon - he's no fool. He and Harry make a rather good team! Also 10 points to Mrs. Norris for helping with the defense and talking to the Sphinx.

And... I knew the poison was going to be a problem! Shall I send Eregion 'round to St. Mungo's?

I really liked the bits with the Harpy, the Banshee, and the Sphinx. Loved the fact Albus is on a first-name basis with her! (Also laughed at Argus' comment about Albus being as bad as Hagrid, too!! Makes sense to me!)

Poor Petunia and Vernon, SO inconvenienced! *Grrrr* I hope someone gives them 'a talk' about proper parenting someday! Oooo, maybe Harry's cure involves extracting body parts from blood kin?? Probably not, but I can hope! And let Severus brew the necessary potion out of said parts! (And give the leftovers to the Sphinx, I'm bloodthirsty tonight, heh!)

Oh dear, Harry is still connected to the Greyling, who is about to recieve the 'thanks' of Voldemort. Not Good! Is Albus aware of the problem? Poor young man is too nice to want to gloat over his attacker's downfall.

Great work you guys!! Thanks for this latest chapter!

Reviewer: PortiaDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25265Chapter: 7
<<"I am sorry, My Lord!" whimpered the Grey Woman. "I hungered so… I needed his magic to sustain me!"

The slitted nostrils flared slightly. "You will not have that worry any longer," he said coldly. "I have a new spell that I've been working on…" >>
Creepy. And a perfect ending to the chapter.

<<"The boy's magic is mine! I will devour his essence and your upstart dark lord can have what remains!">>
Upstart. LOL. As if Voldemort were a cheeky toddler who got too big for his britches.

And my love for the Sphinx is official now. She's awesome--and a Gryffindor ;). I especially like her friendship with Dumbledore--typical of the crazy old man, and it's a nice explanation of his sympathy with Hagrid! You both are doing a great job with this.

Reviewer: JestanaDate: 2003-03-26
Reviewid: 25256Chapter: 7
Bravo! Another wonderful chapter! I never thought about which House Stan could have been in. At the beginning of the story, the Sphinx reflects that Tom would not want to anger her 'patron' (I'm not sure of the exact quote). Would that be Dumbledore? Bravo again!

Reviewer: PiperDate: 2003-03-24
Reviewid: 25042Chapter: 6
Filch is very good at answering questions. I really need to go back and read your other Filch fics. Sounds like you've got an interesting characterization of him.

The sphinx's sad look is very curious... you've got me thinking now. Good chapter! Can't wait for the next one.

What I meant by “woobie” is someone who is sweet and adorable whom I want to hug because he’s so cute, even though he would probably just squirm and try to get away. :-)

Reviewer: JestanaDate: 2003-03-23
Reviewid: 25007Chapter: 6
I'm gone for a week and you post two chapters! Gah! Both were great! I especially like the thought that the Sphinx could be the same one from the Triwizard Tournament. Of course Nagini would claim Harry! She would be greatly rewarded for bringing Harry to Voldemort. I like the idea that Harry would do what he could to assure Filch's safety, as well as that of Mrs. Norris. I really liked Filch's reply to the Harpy's last question. Bravo!

Reviewer: JessanndiDate: 2003-03-21
Reviewid: 24790Chapter: 1
Another cliffhanger! you really are enjoying yourselves here.
Loving the twists in the plot; knowing Niagi's name and Filtch realising that he can say he has taken on Aunt Petunia's challenge.

Poor Harry- Wandless magic, it was all a lot easier when he was young and it was his emotions that caused the magic, before he went to Hogwarts. I'ts been 'taught' out of him.

I can see the differences in style of writing coming out in this story, so I promise, Jelsemium to check out your individual work here at the Quill.

Reviewer: Mary AnneDate: 2003-03-21
Reviewid: 24752Chapter: 6
*"Yesss, Squibsss have always had their usess…" the snake-woman remarked. "Either whole, or in piecesss." Her eyes glittered.*

YIKES!! Poor Filch, what bad memories that line would stir. A real nail-biter of a chapter, and I loved a seemingly trivial detail--Filch making Harry say "Professor Snape" instead of just "Snape"--turned out to be important after all, in showing how Filch could make Harry behave. That's the true Rowling spirit, making those small details count.

Re: C.S. Lewis--the essay to which I referred before, "Screwtape Proposes a Toast," is not in the *Screwtape Letters* but was written later; it's in another book of his essays, *The World's Last Night.* Do read the *Letters* too, if you haven't. Or get the audiobook and listen to *Screwtape Letters* read by John Cleese, which is a real treat!

Speaking of Cleese, I was having some Python moments in this chapter, thinking that Harry might be cast into the Gorge of Eternal Peril if he couldn't answer correctly. "Blue--no, yellow! AIEEEEE!" *Smirk*

A fine chapter, and I can hardly wait for the next. But Nagini, a woman?! Yargh! And what will the others do now that she's blurted out her master's name?

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24725Chapter: 6
Your banshee description is fantastic! I love the amorphous quality of her, with her legs and hair being indistinguishable.
"serpentine lower half swayed sinuously." nice writing! love the alliteration! Hmm, Naigina as half-woman...has Voldie been feeling a little "lonely" lately? ;)

"obscene comments by the Harpy, much of which he only vaguely comprehended anyway." Very funny! A little bit of smart-alec Harry, but still sweetly clueless.

Hehehehe--love Mrs. Norris! She's such a good pet for Filtch; you can truly see the loving bond between the two. Reminds me a bit of this neighbor I have and his cat.

"Nagini let out a hiss to rival the Hogwarts Express." Again, great imagery! You guys have really put a unique spin on describing timeless situations, scenes and movements.

What a fantastically plotted (almost) ending! Make Harry behave! Oh, the sphynx just put the Devourer in her place and it was so great to see Filtch get some due for keeping Harry in line. The utter honesty and simplicity is brilliant! Brilliant!! Wow! Wow! Wow! This feels very much like a classic fairy tale...if you changed the trademark stuff of Harry Potter and Argus Filtch, you could submit this for publication in SF/fantasy journals and magazines. This is an amazing story that barely needs the HP thread to anchor us. This reminds me of Saki and Ronald Dahl short-stories (only with a much happier ending...well, we'll see about Voldemort).

Looking forward to seeing how Naigine tries to make a claim on Harry.

Reviewer: StephanieDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24686Chapter: 6
Ohhhhh I hope Harry or Filch have a smart idea to get out of this :P

Reviewer: SzandaraDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24685Chapter: 6
Woo! It sounds to me as if the protective magic that kept Harry safe when he was with his relatives has been transferred to Filch! If I'm right, the implications of this are pretty serious. Will the magical "shield" that protected Harry with the Dursleys be something Filch can feel (as opposed to the muggles, who didn't know it existed), and will he somehow be able to use it against Voldy? Voldy thinks he is just a powerless squib--he may be in for a surprise! And then, of course, Harry will now have to spend his summers at the castle with Filch instead of at Privet Drive. Probably an improvement, at least Filch will treat him fairly and has some respect for him. Or am I reading too much into this? Can't wait for the next chapter!

Reviewer: kazzaDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24681Chapter: 6
I wonder if Nagini will get her wish or if the other 'judges' will have something to say about it.

Reviewer: kazzaDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24680Chapter: 5
Grey Woman - note to self, do not try to feed a Parselmouth to a snake.
Another excellent chapter. Thanks for posting it

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24677Chapter: 6
I have two chapters to catch up on, it seems.

Last chapter:

Oh, what a wonderful place to be! Sounds like a sewer. Dude, there are some scary things living down there. I think I would prefer the alligators of urban legend over those creatures!

OK, so Voldy's pet snake is this Naga creature. (I'm assuming a Naga is a snake-like people-eater.) If the Gross Things of the Sewer don't like Voldy, why do they not have a problem with Voldy's pet? Or do they not know?

This chapter:

Tasks.... interesting. The Grey Freak should be hoarse by now-- she has been shrieking for a very long time. As for the other creatures: The Harpy seems neutral, the Sphinx seems to favor Filch, kitty, and Harry... probably because of the incident in the maze, the banshee doesn't seem to really care, and Nagini seems... hungry?

Ah... now she's let it slip who her boss is. I wonder how the other monsters will react?

Until next chapter,

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: pogoniaDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24672Chapter: 6
Great story so far - those cliffhangers have my stomach tied up in knots. Loved the layers of meaning and strategy in the questions and the answers. Yes, I think the Sphinx gave Harry and Filch a softball question. Perhaps her motives were related to the terrible events of the Triwizard Tournament but I think she did it out of disdain for the Grey Woman's stupidity and lack of self-discipline, and respect for the wizards' intelligence and courage.

Looking forward to the next instalment!

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24667Chapter: 6
Yay, they won! Boo, Nagini wants to take them away to Voldy-poo! How are they going to get out of this bind? Sounds like the Sphynx had a soft-spot of sorts for Harry, remembering him from the third task. You gals sure know your magical creatures, that's for sure!

Reviewer: Murasaki99Date: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24658Chapter: 6
'The less recognizable ones might be under your bed. I&#8217;d be careful next time I vacuumed if I were you.' - you know, as a kid, I *knew* this was true! LOL

Oh the three tasks were great! Interesting that the Sphinx has some bad feelings about the Triwizard Tournament. She may not be 'safe' but she has her own honor code, yes?

I rather thought Nagini might try to horn in on the prey once the Greyling had been judged lacking in her case. Talk about a double-jeopardy trial!

"And could you make him behave?" and the answer for the Greyling is... no! Hee-hee! And Harry says Argus does make him behave - high praise!! Too bad Argus is way to upset to notice much.

Loved Mrs. Norris intimidating the Greyling by slashing at her ankles! Yay!! (Does the Sphinx have any fellow-feeling for her, considering they are both magical felines?)

Well, I am glad the Grey Stalker is unique... there are plenty of other unpleasent hags in celtic legend, though. Mostly child-drowning lake dwellers. Ick.

Bottom feeding monsters, eh? I don't think I want to meet too many of the top-feeders if the Harp and Nagini et. al. are examples! Yikes! Not unless I have my Nazgul and Elf for escorts! :-)

Great story folks, thank you! I needed something today and this filled the bill. Now to upload my new chapter!

Reviewer: RichardDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24657Chapter: 6
Who says diplomacy can't work?

Part of me kept waiting for Filch to say that he was Hogwart's caretaker - and there for all things Hogwartian were entrusted to his care.

I liked Nagini's 'Rumplestiltskin' bit - although you should have had Filch tell her her name was b*&$h before Harry answered!

I like the way your describe the forms of these assorted nasties - especially the naga. Meanwhile, my descent into fanfiction madness increases - my first thought was - Voldemort's naga? Wait, she was turned inside out by a powerful wizard...oh wait...I wrote that!

Looking forward to more.

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24654Chapter: 6
This was a very exciting chapter. So now we've got Greyling down...Nagini and Voldemort to go! (What a cliffhanger!)

The trial was great. Who would have thought that Filch would fulfill the requirements of being Harry's champion just because he nags the Boy Who Lived to wipe his feet and stay in bed? (I'm sure the Grey Woman & Co. were expecting Harry to give really profound evidence instead of mundane examples. I know I was! Maybe I'm part Harpy...LOL) I can't wait to see how Harry and Filch get out of Voldie's claim!

I don't think I've ever said that I like the POV switches. Filch is great, but it was refreshing to get other peoples' perspectives in a "Squib" fic. I also like the way they refer to Filch as "Broken Wizard." Very KEWL!

Reviewer: KarieDate: 2003-03-20
Reviewid: 24647Chapter: 6
I can't believe it! I was wonderful. You obviously put so much thought and inspiration into it. I really liked the "tasks" (: Argus and Harry both did a great job of thinking on their feet. And the judges were brilliant--but it's not over yet...To quote Willie Wonka, "The suspense is killing me--I hope it lasts!"

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24360Chapter: 5
I've been called worse," I said, shrugging. "Did you tell your aunt that I'm a Squib? How did she know?"
-I liked that Filch wouldn't realize Petunia's real reason.

"When someone is trying to save your life, it's considered good manners to allow yourself to be saved," Potter said, dryly

The boy had risen to his feet. "Voldemort!" he said.
-Sheesh, Gryffs!

Harry's stomach gave a lurch as he recognized the voice as Voldemort's pet snake, Nagini.
-Oh, good twist!

Reviewer: KarieDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24358Chapter: 5
Great twist! Taking them to court indeed. And Harry yelling 'Voldemort' until they promised not to eat Filch and Mrs. Norris was hilarious (: The way the critters talked reminded me a lot of a cross between Gollum and a house elf. The Predators' Court is a great idea, and I can't wait to see the arguments (:

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24329Chapter: 5
"She'll kill both of us now," I choked, dragging my eyes open. "Listen, boy, when someone is trying to save your life it's considered good manners to allow yourself to be saved! You're just as bad as your godfather!" -- Classic Filch!

If I'd expected the boy to be insulted then I was to be sadly disappointed. Potter looked honored by the comparison. His expression was visible in the grey sickly light that shone down all around us.--Classic Harry!

"When someone is trying to save your life, it's considered good manners to allow yourself to be saved," Potter said, dryly.--Touche! (pretend that accent thingy is on the e)

Interesting that Nagini was those yellow-eyed things know that Nagini and VOLDEMORT are in cahoots? I guess I'll find out in the next chapter...

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24324Chapter: 5
*huggles Harry, Filch and Mrs. Norris* I'm glad Filch got to know a bit more about Harry, and how The Boy Who Lived didn't/doesn't have an easy life with his Muggle relations! (What a time, though, for Filch to think about Snape...ah, well, when you think your life is about to end, I guess all sorts of things come to mind!)

It was very astute of Harry to exploit their guards' fear of Voldemort's name. Unfortunately, he did happen to call Nagini to him! Can't wait to find out what happens next!

Reviewer: PiperxDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24312Chapter: 5
"glowing eyes'" and "things that whispered and hissed while they slithered and flopped nastily against the stone floor" were the only descriptions we got for the creatures in the dark but it was more than sufficient to make them incredibly creepy. Your limited choice of words effectively forces the reader to use their imagination, which can be much more frightening.

I love the whole idea of a Council of Predators. It's very JKRish. It's fits very well into the Harry Potter world.

Also loved Harry using Filch's own words against him. Clever boy.

So, will there be some dissention between Nagini and the Gray Stalker as to what to do with the boy? Can't wait to read the rest!


Reviewer: Murasaki99Date: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24308Chapter: 5
"She'll kill both of us now," I choked, dragging my eyes open. "Listen, boy, when someone is trying to save your life it's considered good manners to allow yourself to be saved! You're just as bad as your godfather!" -- Heh-heh, poor Argus! All he's doing is encouraging Harry! Oh well, it was a nice try on his part to give the boy a little 'common sense'. :-)

Things that whispered and hissed while they slithered and flopped nastily against the stone floor. -- Oh, ICK!! This sounds like the escapees from Mordor and Thangorodrim! EEeeeyuck! This is NOT a good situation.

Oops after all that, to have Nagini show up! Oh dear, things are not looking up at all!

Lovely writing in the scene with Argus finding out about Harry's 'home life' and understanding how miserable his youth has been. Very nicely done - just perfect.

I do hope the screwdriver comes in handy! (Made of Gondolin steel, perhaps? :-D )

Reviewer: PiperDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24307Chapter: 4
Hehe. Of course it was never really a question if Harry would come back to save Filch. He's Harry. That's what he does. (The woobie :) )

I really love this. It has all my favorite aspects of a fan fiction: original story which doesn't focus on romance, interesting original characters (who aren't even human!), fleshing out sideline characters like Filch, good characterization of Harry and you even manage to make the Dursleys more interesting. I agree that out of all the Dursleys, Dudley is the one who has the best shot at redemption. A shot in the dark perhaps, but he's not as set in his ways as Petunia and Vernon. I would love to see a redeemed Dudley by the end of the series.

This is a new favorite fic for me. :)


Reviewer: PiperDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24305Chapter: 4
Hehe. Of course it was never really a question if Harry would come back to save Filch. He's Harry. That's what he does. (The woobie :) )

I really love this. It has all my favorite aspects of a fan fiction: original story which doesn't focus on romance, interesting original characters (who aren't even human!), fleshing out sideline characters like Filch, good characterization of Harry and you even manage to make the Dursleys more interesting. I agree that out of all the Dursleys, Dudley is the one who has the best shot at redemption. A shot in the dark perhaps, but he's not as set in his ways as Petunia and Vernon. I would love to see a redeemed Dudley by the end of the series.

This is a new favorite fic for me. :)


Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24300Chapter: 5
[when someone is trying to save your life it's considered good manners to allow yourself to be saved!..."*Professor* Snape] Ha! Even when he's in a dungeon, half-beaten Filtch can still hand out discipline! He's great!

[Outside the circle of grey light that surrounded Potter and me there was an expanse of darkness. The darkness was filled with glowing eyes. Dreadful things were moving beyond the light. Things that whispered and hissed while they slithered and flopped nastily against the stone floor] OMG!! That is sooo creepy! I got the chills reading that! I have a very clear mental image of this place from just those few lines. There's something incredibly primal and ancient inthat description...sort of like being lost in the woods.

Oh, the bonding between Filtch and Harry wa so sweet and sad. Filtch understands why Harry does such a good job at his detentions and his comparison between his situation and Harry's is heartbreaking!

Oooh, love the way Harry shouts Voldemort's name to get the Preditor Council to back off! This cliffhanger is too interesting! Can't wait to see how Harry and Naigini interact!!!! This is such an awesome story!!!

Reviewer: Sweeney AgonistesDate: 2003-03-17
Reviewid: 24266Chapter: 5
The creatures surrounding the tattered trio are really, really creepy -- and it makes me wonder what kind of guardians for something like the Grey Stalker would back away from Voldemort's name. Curiouser and curiouser.

And the bar joke atmosphere of the prologue isn't so funny any more.

And yes...last chapter I wanted to hug Harry and feed him soup, but now I want to hug Filch and feed him soup. His realization made me all teary. Lovely Filch -- and lovely writing, both of you.

Reviewer: RichardDate: 2003-03-16
Reviewid: 24263Chapter: 1
I have enjoyed the entire Squib... series - Jelsemium - you are doing an excellent job, really complementing Ozma's impressive work.

This is an intriguing story - Filch outside the walls of Hogwarts is slightly unsettling- I am sure he feels the same way - since he is as much a part of the castle as the moving staircases or the ceiling of the great hall.

Great premise for a story - I can'rtt wait to see how they get out of this one!

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-03-16
Reviewid: 24229Chapter: 4
That Gryffindor Harry...always so bloody noble and brave. No, more like he does the right thing no matter what. Gotta love him for it, too! You two are doing a wonderful job! I'm on pins and needles waiting for the next chapter!

Reviewer: Mary AnneDate: 2003-03-16
Reviewid: 24136Chapter: 4
Oooooo, that gruesome Gray Woman! *shiver* I was getting lots of C.S. Lewis impressions off of this installment, and let me say right away that there's certainly nothing wrong with that. *grin* But the Gray Lady telling Harry to fight because a brave spirit gives a meal a "lovely flavour" put me in mind of "Screwtape Proposes a Toast," in which the senior devil talks about the bland flavour of souls who committed only little paltry sins, in comparsion to "a Farinata, a Hitler, a Henry VIII," how they "put up a delicious resistance to being devoured." And that such a meal "warmed your innards when you'd got it down." Bleah! And her saying that Harry was her rightful prey put me in mind of the White Witch.

But mind you, I'm not staying you *stole* anything, because this chapter really has a flavour (if we can call it that--*chuckle*) all its own. I love the atmosphere of comedy and tension you've created around your predators. This certainly is a fine collaboration!

Reviewer: Murasaki99Date: 2003-03-15
Reviewid: 24121Chapter: 4
And another scream for this latest cliffhanger! I think I'll cease feeling so guilty about mine... (wicked grin). Now *both* Filch and Potter are in deep you-know-what! Is there a wizarding version of 911?

The Greyling is one of those nasty beings where you wonder why she hasn't yet been hunted down and slain - although maybe she's one of the last (or only?) of her kind?

Hooray for Argus and Mrs. Norris to the rescue! (Well, mostly... but Argus *should* have remembered that Gryffindors wouldn't abandon their friends!) Are both of them going to need a rescue? How far away are Dumbledore or Snape? And wouldn't Snape be cheerful about rescuing Harry, he'd just blame it on the 'Potter Effect' wouldn't he?

Sorry I'm late reviewing this - I came home last night with the intent to sit down and read at my leisure and then my half-grown kitten Greymalkin decided to jump on the counter and find a paring knife the hard way, putting a nice gash in his hind leg. Off to the vet emergency clinic! He's now home today sulking with an elizabethan collar and I'm a bit poorer, but oh well. Familiars, what are you going to do? :-)

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2003-03-15
Reviewid: 24044Chapter: 4
[The stench of old, hungry magic was everywhere in here. It had soaked into the walls, the floor, the air. The light that was able to penetrate this chamber was grey and sickly.] Great imagery. I love your descriptions of how Argus "feels" magic is its own entity and life force, that it can be old, new, powerful and weak.

[I'm not anything of yours! Especially not your dinner!"] Ha! I love Harry when his spirit shows, like in PoA and GoF. He's got this incredibly sense of spirit and you've conveyed that nicely.

[Gryffindors! I thought in despair, as the blackness took me.] Aw, it's such a shame Filtch underestimates himself so much. He really comes through when you need him and he's got a great sense f humor about things. I really love your Filtch stories; there's always so much adventure in them. Looking forward to the next chapter!!

Reviewer: kazzaDate: 2003-03-14
Reviewid: 23973Chapter: 4
~~Gryffindors! I thought in despair, as the blackness took me. ~~
So how miffed with Godric's door be if his friend gets attacked?
I wonder how face the castle's magic can reach...

It was interesting that the Grey Woman called Harry the same thing that Filch calls Mrs Norris. Will Mrs Norris refuse to abandon Filch?

Lovely ideas in this story and well composed too.

Reviewer: LizBeeDate: 2003-03-14
Reviewid: 23965Chapter: 4
All right, that's just nasty. I'm supposed to simply walk away and wait for the next update?

As always, Harry is fantastic. "I am not your dinner!" *cheers Harry* And I like Filch more and more with every story.

Reviewer: The Good Doctor MonacoDate: 2003-03-14
Reviewid: 23923Chapter: 4
One little sentence from Petunia was all the catalyst needed for Filch and Harry to break that spell. Harry's life was just saved because of Filch's bravery and quick thinking, but also because Petunia unwittingly said "the magic words."

But SHE doesn't have to know that! *evil grin*

Of course, you may have already written it out that she does find out. If that's the case, then I'm afraid I sound quite stupid right now, lol.

Uh-oh.... now the Grey Freak is strangling Filch. Though it seems Harry has stayed to help.

OK, if it was me, I would have shouted a curse or somethnig at the Grey Freak instead of "Let him go!" Wait-- does he have his wand? I can't remember.

"Gryffindors!" -- LOL!

Whoa! Cliffhanger!! Dude, I'm not going to be able to come to the Quill until next Wednesday, so I'm going to be waiting in suspense for almost a week! (Patience, Good Doctor, patience.)

Until next update (or when I come back),

~Dr. Monaco~

Reviewer: JestanaDate: 2003-03-14
Reviewid: 23901Chapter: 4
Wonderful! Short, but good. I like how Filch tries to twist the ancient laws to help Harry. Especially since he's a great believer in rules. I'm not surprised that Harry came to Filch's rescue. Just like him. *rolls eyes* ;-)

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