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| Dumbledore's
Army |
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Review(s): 3
| Reviewer: jay | Date: 2005-06-06 |
| Reviewid: 123400 | Chapter: 1 |
hey great sory, sorry to criticise but near the middle of the story you wote t instead of to. great story thanks for writting. Jay |
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| Reviewer: Tapestry | Date: 2003-09-03 |
| Reviewid: 50443 | Chapter: 1 |
| I enjoyed reading this story, you have some good back and forth dialogue between the trio. A few things puzzeled me however, why didn't Harry use his hankerchief if he's been sneezing for four hours? Why didn't Hermione do her bluebelle flames charm, she's very good at it and uses it all the time. Those were areas I'd like to see the story address. Also, I think Ron was just slightly out of character, he felt like basically the comic relief in this piece and I think he's a much stronger and more essential part of the trio than that. That said this is entirely your story and you are free to picture the three of them however you like :) I think this story has a lot of potential and you've done a good job with it. |
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| Reviewer: SilverMoon | Date: 2003-09-01 |
| Reviewid: 50034 | Chapter: 1 |
Very original story! I loved the pepsi can portkeys! ^^ lol And you did Ron's character perfectly! I love the spiders! Keep up the good work! It's a great story!
-SilverAries |
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