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Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Le Mouton Blanc
Review(s): 46

Reviewer: MarcellaDate: 2005-09-15
Reviewid: 132586Chapter: 1
Congrads on a very well written story!
I feel ssssooooo bad for Andromeda and Narcissa. Especially Narcissa, seeing how awful her life ends up!

Reviewer: Reader2Date: 2005-03-21
Reviewid: 117333Chapter: 1
*

Reviewer: GyakutennoDate: 2004-11-01
Reviewid: 103124Chapter: 1
It's kind of... kind of disturbing, Sirius and Bellatrix in the same house, just little kids, playing! And when they're older... Bellatrix kills him! she's always been a bad egg, I guess. And her parents punished Andromeda for NOT being bad! Anyway, poor ol' Andromeda!

Reviewer: Weasel KingDate: 2004-06-09
Reviewid: 86487Chapter: 1
DID U RITE ANOTHER ONE????? YOU MUST! THIS IS soooooo gOOD! i'LL JYST HAVE TO MAKE SUM PICS 4 IT!!!

~wEASEL kING

Reviewer: CornedBeeDate: 2004-05-18
Reviewid: 83337Chapter: 1
Great. Just great. Would you consider continuing this as a series?

Reviewer: Emerald GreeneDate: 2004-01-21
Reviewid: 67852Chapter: 1
Good story, but, UGH! I have never hated anyone so much in a story than that little brat Bellatrix! Even Umbridge isn't competition for her! good writing style though...

Reviewer: RowenaDate: 2004-01-04
Reviewid: 65708Chapter: 1
I really liked this story. It was well written, and it was somewhat realistic (in the HP sense, I mean). Does it continue to when they're at school? I'd love to read another like it! :)

Reviewer: Snape's Pretty PrincessDate: 2003-10-30
Reviewid: 58338Chapter: 1
Once again "The Morning Starr" you've done it. Given us a little glimpse into the dysfunctional minds of those facinating neurotic pure-bloods. Perhapse it's all the inbreading? Maybe they are just a freak of nature. But don't we love to hate them.

Reviewer: EmilyDate: 2003-10-22
Reviewid: 57477Chapter: 1
Very good, but that's it? No fair. :(

Reviewer: WeaverDate: 2003-10-15
Reviewid: 56548Chapter: 1
Left to right. Left to right. Sorry. One day I'll learn to tell which is which, I swear.
>.<

Reviewer: WeaverDate: 2003-10-15
Reviewid: 56547Chapter: 1
I really, really liked this - oh, the adorableness of baby!Sirius! - but I couldn't help being jarred constantly by your timelines and age issues.

Particularly that Bellatrix is the *oldest* Black sister and Narcissa the youngest, but also a few other little things that I had to stop and think about. Mainly, though, the age of the sisters - it is actually canon that Bellatrix is the oldest, looking at the Black family tapestry. Andromeda is in the middle, Narcissa to the right, Bellatrix to the left - family trees are drawn right to left, oldest to youngest.

Apart from that, of course, it was brilliant. Bellatrix as the terrible child - perfect characterisation. I can't imagine her being any other sort of child! Just fantastic.

Reviewer: IceDate: 2003-10-02
Reviewid: 55213Chapter: 1
wow...that was really interesting. narcissa the human...who woulda thunk it?

Reviewer: BirgitDate: 2003-09-23
Reviewid: 54095Chapter: 1
Brilliant! I like your view of the Black family very much. I can just picture little Bellatrix sitting with the heavy genealogy book.
You described the events in the bookshop perfectly. I thought the Black family would get into a fight with Robin, but instead Robin was unnoticed, while Ted Tonks wasn't... Luckily he wasn't physically hurt, but he must have been hurt by Bellatrix in another way.
I wonder though why Narcissa ends up marrying a Death Eater. In this story, she seemed to be more like Andromeda than like Bellatrix.

Reviewer: LizDate: 2003-09-21
Reviewid: 53863Chapter: 1
Wow. Great fic! Loved the Sirius getting dressed up part! : )

The characterazations of all three sisters where amazing. Bellatrix was the one that I loved the most. Her screaming about the Mudblood touching her... so in character.

Please write more Black stuff!

Reviewer: SpartinaDate: 2003-09-17
Reviewid: 53148Chapter: 1
You've given us a fascinating look into the Black family dynamic here! I especially liked the apparent normality of them all--nobody's bathing in the blood of unbaptized infants here, nobody's obviously a Dark wizard--even as you set forth the signs that all is not well, and certainly not normal, with the Blacks. Vera as observer, and Narcissa in the role of mediator and placater, were particularly good--so was the glimpse of little Sirius being dressed up like a large doll and enjoying it. So were the contradictions in Aurora's behavior--kind to Vera, the outsider, but allowing Capella to lecture Andromeda and openly treating Andromeda as the "unsatisfactory" sister. While Capella is clearly a nasty piece of work, Aurora--outwardly a pleasanter person--is not much better.

When I first read this story, Bellatrix's character seemed a little over-the-top--stamping on the Dumbledore doll, howling that "it'll take fifty scouring charms to get the filth off my hand." But at a second reading, the way you've portrayed this scary child is a real accomplishment: sly, rageful, malicious, able to produce tears and appear pitiful whenever it suits her, quick to divine what will bring her the approval of her parents, creepy in her obsessive (almost ritualistic) recitation of the wizard genealogies, revelling in her own ability to frighten her oldest sister. It's a plausible picture of a very young sociopath, already pursuing an uncanny fate in the midst of a family that either encourages her or tries to placate her. The one false note I find in this portrayal is that Andromeda should ever have left her wand, Regulus, and Bellatrix in the same room--since she's the only member of the family who understands how dangerous Bellatrix is. But this is a very small quibble to make about a very well-drawn family portrait.

Reviewer: Talking Purple RabbitsDate: 2003-09-16
Reviewid: 52901Chapter: 1
::cries:: Poor Andromeda!

Excellently done, you know. A perfect blend of canon and good writing to make an excellent fic.

Poor Ted, poor Robin, and poor Andromeda. What a miserable life she must have had growing up.

again, it was excellent.

ta,
~TPR

Reviewer: RussaDate: 2003-09-16
Reviewid: 52887Chapter: 1
Well, of all the vicious little cats... Bellatrix is awful!
Wonderful story, positively spiffing!
Keep up the good writing!

Reviewer: B. NonymousDate: 2003-09-15
Reviewid: 52861Chapter: 1
I read this thanks to Audrey's drawing.

Wasn't Ted Tonks a Muggle, not a Muggle-born wizard? Apart from that small nit, this was an excellent portrait into the three Black sisters! I especially like how much of a brat little Bella was.

Reviewer: BreenDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52609Chapter: 1
Wow... I don't usually comment. But that was really good. I never thought of Andromeda as being the oldest and Bellatrix as the youngest. But it fits really well. I also liked how Narcissa was pretty neutral.. like not horribly evil like Bellatrix. Good Job! :)

Reviewer: MinoukatzeDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52558Chapter: 1
Oh, I love the finished version of this! What a great character study- I love seeing the backgrounds of characters before they become heroes or villains. It makes me want to read more about them.

Reviewer: ZoeSmithDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52529Chapter: 1
Oh my God!!! Kellie this is brilliant. This story is so very very well written. You really make me feel things for all the characters. They're very vivid. I loved the scene between Andromeda and Ted, untill Bellatrix apeared. She is scary. Even from such a young age.
I loved Narcissa and Vera's friendship. I was trully looking forward to read about their trip to Diagon Alley.
And of course Sirius!!!! Oh boy!!! That was beyond words. I'll never get that image out of my head!! He was adorable. More than adorable. Perfect.
Thank you for that beautiful story. I loved it! :-)
Kisses, Zoe

Reviewer: Tamira LuneDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52433Chapter: 1
OOOH they're properly dreadful! Keep it up, will this story have a sequel? I think that would be cool!

Reviewer: JessicaDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52407Chapter: 1
Sorry, reviewing again. Did I mention how AUTHENTIC your characterizations are? I feel so sad for Andromeda, evil little Bellatrix...I hate evil little girls who play innocent when they aren't! Bad! You have rekindled my hate for Bellatrix. They dig a big hole and bury her alive and then pour hot lava over it! *has some issues* Maybe then she won't grow up to kill poor Sirius!

But yeah, I really like how you give each of the sisters their personality. Poor Narcissa, stuck in the middle. I wonder what happens that will make her join evil Lucius and the dark side when her older sister is good?! *hint* WRITE MORE!

Reviewer: JessicaDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52402Chapter: 1
That was really AWESOME! One of the most intriguing families in my opinion in Potterverse are the Blacks because there was obvious conflict within it but not very much is said! This is a great take on the three sisters' lives when they were children! I've always wondered about them since they all turned out to be so different, so I really enjoyed reading this. I hope you write more about Andromeda, Narcissa, and Bellatrix because I will DEFINITELY read them!

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52353Chapter: 1
Yay, it's up! Congratulations, Kellie -- congrats on this and all your great reviews!

Reviewer: Kellie reply to Margaret B. and CelticQueenFanDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52328Chapter: 1
Margaret: page 50 of the American Version has Tonks saying "my dad's Muggle-born and he's a right old slob." Later when looking at the tapestry, Sirius says that Andromeda was blasted for marrying Muggle-born Ted Tonks.

CelticQueenFan- That's actually Arthus and Billius (the one that saw the Grim), and not Bill and Charlie. Billius has the glasses.

To everyone else... thank you so much for the kind reviews! I'm so glad you like the story!

Reviewer: YolandaDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52324Chapter: 1
This is quite a chilling story. You did a great job with your characterizations. Bellatrix's behavior reminded me of children in Nazi Germany. They had been so indoctrinated that they weuld turn their parents into the authorities. Bellatrix would certainly do well in that kind of organization--and we know she will. The scene with Ted was pretty chilling.

Reviewer: SennaDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52315Chapter: 1
Excellent! This is a fantastic piece about the Black sisters! I loved hating Bellatrix, and I really like the way you've portrayed Narcissa as not pure evil. Well done!

:)
Senna

Reviewer: celticQueenfanDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52309Chapter: 1
I liked it!But I thought Lucius was alot older then Bill and charlie. But other then that its very good.

Reviewer: Silver PatronusDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52303Chapter: 1
Bellatrix should be stuffed into a tiny box and shipped off to a desert island to rot, the horrible little child.

Brilliant fic Kellstarr, as per usual. ;) I like Vera a lot, and how you used her character to give the reader insight into how bizarre the Black family really is.

CrossDressingIckle!Sirius. *dies*

Well done, with really good flow and continuity. Keep it up! :)

Reviewer: Margaret B.Date: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52300Chapter: 1
Great job- I love Andromeda, she is so cool! One tiny nitpick though- wasn't Ted tonks a muggle, not a muggleborn? Anyway, great job though!
~Meg

Reviewer: LeaDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52276Chapter: 1
Kellie.. your Bellatrix.. very good. She scares the heck out of me. I look forward to more Black Sister stories?

Reviewer: AshDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52269Chapter: 1
Wow, Kellie! This story is amazing. :) I don't think I've ever been more disturbed by such a little girl than I was by Bellatrix. The other two sisters had wonderful characterizations as well...they were ambiguous (even Andromeda doesn't show any great LOVE for Muggle-borns), but there were clear indications of what they'd turn out to be.

Capella Black--the hair dyed black so much that it looked purple---eek. Looks like she'd let herself go by the time Sirius ran away. Suitably evil, evil, woman.

Bellatrix's parting words...wow, the little brat. Once again, very very disturbed by this girl.

LOVELY job! *hugs* Many many congratulations on getting this fic up. :)

Reviewer: canis lupusDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52267Chapter: 1
nice...poor Andromeda! bellatrix is...uh, extremely annoying. nice to teach her a lesson...i have little siblings, and they can be tough, but they're not THAT bratty! hehehe...oh, and i like Narcissa here! she's a NICE narcissa! :) what happened to make her mrs. malfoy?

Reviewer: NaeDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52264Chapter: 1
<3, All the sisters are wonderfully built up, especially Bellatrix.
*tries to strangle fictional character*

Reviewer: ReemsDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52244Chapter: 1
It's up! *bounce*

And it's bloody brilliant. I knew it would be. :p I love how you portrayed all three sisters - although Bellatrix does terrify me. ;) Narcissa's great, as is Andromeda - and SIRIUS!!! *squee* So cute.

I do feel sorry for poor Vera, though. :p And one last thing -

"Number Thirty-Three"

*cough*

Nice. ^_^

Reviewer: JyriDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52240Chapter: 1
Aaand she's up! Congratulations, Kellie. You've worked so hard for this. *hugs*

Sirius: I've told you in no uncertain fangirlish squeeing terms that he's adorable. He should keep up that habit, for a certain someone. ;)

Bellatrix: I adore your depiction of her. She's so cute, in an 'Oh, God, I'm glad I'm not a mum' type way. She seems to have taken her parents' beliefs and turned them into a fixation, and that's fascinating to read.

Everyone here is written beautifully, slotting neatly into what we see in canon but expanding their character (Narcissa's a great example of this).

It's a great family piece, and gongrats again on getting it posted! :)

Reviewer: ileneDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52226Chapter: 1
I echoing the comments about your portrayal of Andromeda and Bellatrix, but let me add some about Narcissa. It's nice that you portray her as a pretty normal girl for her age, when so many people make her into a two-dimensional "ice queen" from the start. Though that does make me wonder a bit about your "bad seed" depiction of Bellatrix. Was she just born evil? Sure, you depict the Black sisters' parents as committed to the "Toujours Pur" doctrine, but not in the fanatic way Bellatrix is. Her reciting of the family geneology reminded me of how some autistic children get obssesed with things like the calendar, and can automatically figure out, when given a date, exactly what day of the week it fell on. I liked the Ted Tonks and Lucius Malfoy cameos, too.

Reviewer: StargazerDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52220Chapter: 1
Wow, Kellie that was incredible. I loved the way you have portrayed all three of the Black sisters. Bellatrix is absolutely chilling especially for a child. I really liked Andromeda's personality and the part with Sirius was hysterical. Great job sweetie and congrats on becoming a SQ author!

Reviewer: SonicDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52214Chapter: 1
Talk about one nut of a sister... Woh...
Bellatrix was just disturbing.. Good job! :)

- Sonic

Reviewer: AudreyDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52213Chapter: 1
I'm torn between having delightful visions of ickle!Sirius dancing through my head (complete with oversized clothes and- ..ooh boy, I think a sketch bunny just bit me. Darn. ;P), and being scared silly by Bellatrix, who frankly just made me go 0_o. She is really *weird*.

In short, my dear- you bloody ROX. :D

Reviewer: TapestryDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52205Chapter: 1
I really enjoyed this insight into what the black children might have been like as children. Bella was seriously chilling. And I had to grin at Sirius in his oversize robes, that was too funny. Poor Andromeda, it can't have been easy growing up in a family like that! Great work and thanks for sharing it :) Congrats again on getting onto the Quill!

Reviewer: ChrisDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52195Chapter: 1
Great characterizations! All of the interactions between the sisters felt very real in this story. A really good glimpse at the beginning of what many of these characters grew up to be. Great job!

Reviewer: ChloéDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52191Chapter: 1
WOW ...just ... WOW !
Are you planning a sequel ? cause I WILL definitelly read it! No, actually you have to write more !

Reviewer: scm0516Date: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52168Chapter: 1
Wow, this story is awesome. I love when people write about the Black sisters. You have to write more, you have captured them very well. Good job, keep up the work.

Reviewer: shellebelleDate: 2003-09-13
Reviewid: 52153Chapter: 1
Well, you know I love this fic. I love the exchanges between the sisters and of course, your ickle!Sirius is absolutely adorable. Bellatrix is incredibly chilling but also very real.

Congratulations on becoming a Quill author!

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