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Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Moondance
Review(s): 104

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-08-31
Reviewid: 145113Chapter: 5
IĎve read this before, and hopefully posted. However, it really is just too good not to read a second time. Thanks for sharing.

Reviewer: marauder4everDate: 2006-02-26
Reviewid: 140302Chapter: 5
Good story!For some reason, I want to read it over again.

Reviewer: GenesseDate: 2005-08-26
Reviewid: 130967Chapter: 5
Katinka and Lilac recommended I read this story, and I'm very glad that I did. It's beautifully written without being sentimental. I particularly liked these lines:
>>1999...oh my, I believe that will be my first year without a Weasley. I'll need someone to look after.<<
and
>>But it was still a wonderful story and he didnít want to stop telling it, so he lowered his voice and told the rest of it to the swaying branches of the willow tree. And since there was no one around to correct him, he took the liberty of changing the ending.<<
Wow. Are you sure that this was your "first real foray"? :D

Reviewer: HossDate: 2005-08-22
Reviewid: 130525Chapter: 5
That was one dame good story, and I would love to see you continue with a story of Remus brinning the letter to Bridget.And her first day at Hogwarts. Now that would be fun.

Reviewer: Brian TurkDate: 2005-01-07
Reviewid: 110153Chapter: 5
I just loved how you took so many things that seemed unrelated and unremarkable and made them resolve with power at the end. This was not only sweet and insightful, but emotional and chilling. One of the best stories with a significant OC that I've read yet!

Reviewer: moonetteDate: 2004-11-13
Reviewid: 104683Chapter: 5
I just read this all at one sitting and thought it was wonderful. I loved the characterization of the little girl. I have a 6 year old girl, and Bridget seemed so real. With that and some of the sentiments by the other characters, I feel you must be a parent. I also loved Remus' characterization, and think his dialogue was so RJL. His transformation was well described too. There was only one part that didn't feel right to me in terms of Lupin, and that was when he met Bridget's father. I felt both men were too comfortable with each other too quickly. And I didn't feel Lupin would be so bold as to stand up in someone's house that he just met and go to the refrigerator and help himself to a drink. But this is such a small detail in such a wonderfully written and plotted story. Many of the lines were moving, the setting was well described and easily imagined, and other canon characters were spot on. The revelation about the mother was wonderful and surprising, and I loved the happy ending.

Reviewer: KittyDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104535Chapter: 5
This story was absolutely lovely! Enchanting and so well-written! Let me just say this - I read the first two parts before heading out for a meeting this evening, and all I could think about on the way home was getting back and reading the rest of it. Well done!

Reviewer: Chartreuse BirdDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104484Chapter: 5
Wonderful! I'd just like to say that Bridget and her father are not the only ones who dance in the moonlight... I love how you are developing these characters, though I'd like to know a bit more about Elias.

Reviewer: CatherineDate: 2004-10-20
Reviewid: 102006Chapter: 3
Hmmm...I'll be interested to see where this conversation goes with Connor.

As usual, well written, with deft dialogue.

Catherine

Reviewer: pogoDate: 2004-10-15
Reviewid: 101531Chapter: 5
What a wonderful story, I just hope you consider writing about the birthday party, I'd like to know how Mr. Logan reacts to the news that his wife really didn't desert them but instead saved them.

Reviewer: CatherineDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100557Chapter: 2
Oh my. This story unfolds with a natural story tellers ear. The pacing is perfect.

Catherine

Reviewer: KaesaDate: 2004-10-02
Reviewid: 100122Chapter: 5
This is a really neat story; poor little Bridget is a convincing six-year-old and your extra details about the magical world are very convincing. I'm glad you gave it a happy ending, though; if she'd ended up dying of the anesthetic, I'd be terribly depressed. ::grin:: I hope she has a good time at Hogwarts.

Reviewer: JetamorsDate: 2004-09-30
Reviewid: 99910Chapter: 5
What a great, well-put-together story! The best part is that it could so easily fit into canon. And I like how you've ended it also; there's no magic cure for lycanthropy, but she'll live, and that's enough.

Reviewer: CatherineDate: 2004-09-23
Reviewid: 99125Chapter: 1
What a provocative and interesting premise!

The descriptions are vivid, and Bridget is a fantastic character. Nice of you not to provide us with another love interest, but instead go an entirely different route.

The humor is also subtle. Wonderful work! I'm looking forward to reading more!

Catherine

Reviewer: KateDate: 2004-07-21
Reviewid: 93377Chapter: 5
JC...fantastic job! I've been so lax in reading stories of my friends and now I'm kicking myself for not reading this one earlier. It's brilliant! You have such a nice, easy writing style. It makes it very easy to become lost in your world. The characterizations are fantastic and I can't wait to read the companion piece.

So sorry for taking so long to read this...I can promise you it won't happen again!

Reviewer: MiriamDate: 2004-07-19
Reviewid: 93162Chapter: 5
This was charming! Remus was fully in character, and the situation could happen in the Rowlingverse. Bridget is lively, and convincing as a character.

I like this creation. Good job.

-----Miriam

Reviewer: Cheesy MonkeyDate: 2004-07-18
Reviewid: 93004Chapter: 5
I'm a horrible reviewer, so let me just say that was an excellent piece of ficcage. Perhaps I'll read more of your works. Cheers! -Cheesy

Reviewer: BrigantiaDate: 2004-06-25
Reviewid: 88734Chapter: 5
This is a wonderful story. First, because it's always a pleasure to read a story with a character named Bridget (my name); second, because she's a great character - a thoroughly believable six-year-old, and very sweet. I love the way she keeps trying to show Remus just one more thing. And third, because your Remus is spot-on the Remus we all know and love. His interaction with Bridget is terrific, full of the qualities that make him such a great teacher. And it's really great to see him have the chance to help someone who shares his condition.

I might add that while Minerva's appearance is very brief, you captured her character perfectly too, and Conor is very likeable. I hope you'll be writing more stories!

Reviewer: CatDate: 2004-04-25
Reviewid: 80092Chapter: 5
I was actuallly recommended this fic by your daughter. Or someone that said she was your daughter, I don't think she had reason to lie though. I asked for fics that involved children.

I'm so glad I came to read this! It is so wonderful! Plus I just adore happy endings! Sad stories are good but I can't help it if I like fairy tale endings. Not to mention the fact that you kept Remus in character. Which is great.

You do such a wonderful job at everything in this fic. The plot, the characters, the ending. Everything is just so perfect! It brings tears to my eyes!

-Cat

Reviewer: technetiumDate: 2004-02-10
Reviewid: 70062Chapter: 5
That was awesome! Cute, touching, well-written, great characterization . . just fantastic!

Reviewer: CarmenDate: 2004-01-18
Reviewid: 67632Chapter: 5
Wow! This is really good! I feel so sorry for Bridget! SHe's a witch though, so it'll be better! Yay! This is such a sad story,m but it's got such a happy ending you could just jump up and down! Which is what I'd do except that it'd be kinda odd....

This is a really good story! I love the title, and the plot, and the characters, and Remus was really IC, and it's so happy! But so sad! Um... I'm just gonna stay this is a GREAT story, and you should write a sequel about Bridget at Hogwarts because I think that's be really cool, and I'm just going to stop now before I repeat myself more than I already have... :P

Reviewer: CendrillonDate: 2004-01-04
Reviewid: 65872Chapter: 5
I had kept reading reviews of this story on the Review Challenge and Literary Discussion thread and I'm so glad I finally got around to reading it. This is a wonderful piece. Full of drama, mystery, and intrigue. The characters are beautifully written and drawn out and the story just sucks you in and leaves you wanting more. An incredible accomplishment. I absolutely loved the bit about Amanda's father being both a wizard and a werewolf hunter. I think the best thing about this story is that somehow all of the characters seemed real, so all of the emotions were much more intense.

I hope to see more stories of this caliber from you in the near future.

Reviewer: Jo WickaninnishDate: 2003-12-05
Reviewid: 61876Chapter: 5
I read that your story was recommended several times on the boards, so I decided to check it out... I was pleasantly surprised.

The scene with Remus telling Bridget the story of Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs was so adorable, and the note that he changed the ending... I nearly cried.

Your entire story was phenomenal. I really liked it. I'd actually like to read more about Bridget if you were ever up for writing it.

Reviewer: TapestryDate: 2003-11-24
Reviewid: 60625Chapter: 5
I just wanted to chime in and say how much I've loved this story! It was so well written. Your characters were well fleshed out and endearing. Your descriptions were simply gorgoues and painted the scene perfectly. With each chapter I found myself getting lost in the story and I wanted it to last much longer than it did. I'm sincerely hoping you'll write more about Bridget, especially about her time at school. Wonderful, wonderful job and thank you so much for sharing it!

Reviewer: ariosDate: 2003-11-19
Reviewid: 60569Chapter: 5
Terrific story! It's calling for a sequel!! (hint hint)

Reviewer: Three Sickles ShortDate: 2003-11-18
Reviewid: 60471Chapter: 5
All of us who suspected that there had to be more to our little Muggle girl than met the eye got a lovely payoff in this chapter. Poor Amanda.

I loved Remus's scene with Minerva. The two of them really work well together.

Interesting to have at least one parent refuse to send his child to Hogwarts because of Remus. I wonder how many other parents knew/cared that there was a student who was a werewolf.

This was a really sweet story, and I look forward to reading more of your work.

TSS

Reviewer: josie cDate: 2003-11-17
Reviewid: 60419Chapter: 5
*sigh* that was so sweet. I loved this story! please tell me there is a sequel to this! I look forward to more of your stories. you are a great author and keep up the good work.

Reviewer: Edd woodwardDate: 2003-11-17
Reviewid: 60416Chapter: 5
this can't be the end. Please see this story all the way through.

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2003-11-17
Reviewid: 60394Chapter: 5
Oh, Chris! This is one of my favourite stories at the Quill! I was planning to write a review after the previous chapter, but got so caught up in it that I was here before I knew it!

What can I say? Your descriptions are flawless, not a wasted word anywhere. And this beginning is simply beautiful. All of it rings true:

>>Remus had always felt that there was something very decadent about waking up slowly. It reminded him of seaside holidays he had taken as a child, when clocks were mostly ignored and the only obligations heíd had were meals and sandcastles. As he drifted up from sleep in the Logansí guestroom, he allowed himself the luxury of leisure. He stretched his whole body, listening to the pops and creaks of his knees and ankles. He blinked his eyes open and looked around the room, taking only a moment to recall where he was. He rolled on his side and contemplated going back to sleep. >>

Your words both warm ("She threw her arms around him and hugged him as hard as she could, pulling her head back to kiss him on the cheek. He pulled her close and tried to memorize the way she felt, small and soft, smelling of hay and soap.") and chill ("The sunshine was warm on his face and he enjoyed it after the coldness of Bridgetís room. He imagined her lying sedated on the metal table, with Conor standing helpless beside her as the wolf inside clawed its way out. A shiver ran through him."). We are completely at your mercy. :)

Yours is by far the richest, most credible description of Remus Lupin's character that I have seen yet. And Bridget is so real an OC, she may as well be flesh and blood.

And the mystery of her mother's background, that entire backstory, the way it all weaves together in a lovely complex knot that you've unraveled so elegantly without revealing all -- simply amazing. Please tell me there's going to be a sequel. You've swept me away and managed to take me to a new place vivid and rich and real as if I had gone there through my own front door. To me, yours is the truest kind of magic. :)

Congratulations on a beautiful story.

Axelle

Reviewer: atroposDate: 2003-11-17
Reviewid: 60393Chapter: 5
This is a lovely conclusion JiminyC. I'm so happy you found a way for Remus to help Bridget, and imagine him telling her she's a witch, and all about Hogwarts - she'll be so excited about it by the time she gets there. In a way, like birgit, I was a little bit sorry that she didn't turn out to be a Muggle so that we could see how Remus would deal with that particular issue, but your ending makes complete sense after the clues you dropped about Amanda. And that twist about Amanda's background was completely unexpected. How on earth must she have felt when she believed she had totally cut herself off from that world, and then her daughter was bitten? Her father must have been the most terrible man if Amanda's first thought was to kill him and not even try to reason with him. And your Minerva was great - very in character.

I have really enjoyed reading this story and I look forward to more of your work. Oh, and BTW thanks for the invitation. If you ever see a tallish blondish plumpish woman dancing very badly in your back garden that'll be me!

Atropos

Reviewer: SpringrainDate: 2003-11-17
Reviewid: 60370Chapter: 5
Such a cute story. I liked the idea of him just meeting another werewolf, and the twist was cool too.

Reviewer: Tamia LuneDate: 2003-11-16
Reviewid: 60212Chapter: 5
I have loved this story all along. Is there going to be a sequel with Bridget's years at Hogwarts? That would be so cool!

Reviewer: Wolf550eDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60154Chapter: 5
Wonderful story full of emotion and truly great characters. Keep up the good work!

Reviewer: SonicDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60132Chapter: 5
That was a great piece. You captured the dialogue between Bridget and Remus quite well and the ending is quite heartwarming.. :)

Was wondering though.. is there a sequel? You know, the birthday part, and perhaps five years later???

- Sonic

Reviewer: miss_lily_lupinDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60126Chapter: 5
*squeal* I love it! But I still want more! MORE STORY! I have to know what happens to her and everything!

Reviewer: MaglorDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60116Chapter: 1
I agree with the other reviewers that this final chapter was both moving and well-written, and a good tying up of loose ends. Yet I'm not 100% positive - sorry about that. I miss Bridget - in person, that is. She was in all the previous chapters, and somehow I felt a little unbalanced at the end.
Also, I wondered about the Hogwarts letter. How do they know Bridget's a witch? If she hasn't shown any signs of magic yet, how they know she won't turn out a Squib? I'd have expected Remus to see her do a bit of magic (like Harry in the Zoo in PS/SS) during his birthday visit, and to have an additional talk with Conor about it.
But this probably just means I want more, because I love this story to distraction!

Reviewer: KatinkaDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60103Chapter: 5
Now on to chapter 5... Oh, my. You had me *sobbing*, woman! :) I was wondering how you'd be able to bring "Moondance" to a satisfying, complete end in just one more chapter, but you did it wonderfully. Remus was very much in-character, guarding his secrets until he had no choice but to share them.

The descriptions of the werewolf hunters were gruesome and disturbing(who would bring a CHILD on such an expedition?!??), especially since they didn't seem to care if their prey was in active werewolf form:

>>The hunters in the picture cheered and toasted to their success, but the bruised and bloody man on the ground did not move at all. There was something horribly chilling about the presence of a completely still person in a wizard photograph.

What a revelation about Amanda...not what I was expecting, but yet it made so much sense. I tell you, this line just about did me in:

>>"Looking at this, though, you'd think she loved nothing so well as her father. She must've found something she loved more."

And then, I loved how you brought the story full-circle, tying up all the ends:

>>Minerva frowned. "I'm sorry...I thought you knew. The reason he wouldn't let Amanda come to Hogwarts was that he had somehow found out there was a werewolf attending the school."

Remus felt his skin prickle up in goosebumps. "Me."

What a beautiful, heartwarming ending. I loved this story. You do realize that you've left the door open for a continuation, don't you? ;)

~Katinka

Reviewer: KatinkaDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60102Chapter: 4
You're quick! I've been meaning all week to post my review of chapter 4, and here comes chapter 5! I'm still reeling from the brilliance of that, but I still want to add my thoughts on the previous chapter.

The bond between Remus and Bridget is so touching. We can tell it goes beyond "Oh, here's the nice man who helped me when I got lost"...Bridget is fully aware that he *knows* what's it like to be her, and she doesn't want to lose that:

>>Then she leaned forward and spoke very fast. "Or bring them by when you come to visit. Like if you come for my birthday party."

Your characterizations are so thorough that when Conor revealed the effects of Bridget's injections, I thought, "Well, of course, that's why he's evasive! Conor wouldn't do anything dodgy!"

I think this was one of the most impactful passages I've ever read in fanfiction:

>>Conor looked up at the broken window. "It didnít even slow down when it hit the window. It landed on the ground and just kept running. And all because of an eclipse, you say? The anesthesia didnít help at all. It was gone so fast I couldnít even run after it."

"Not Ďití," Remus said softly. "Her."

*sniff!*

Doggie toys for Sirius -- hee hee.

You do an excellent job in capturing that pure, unhesitating love of a child. Like others (hint, hint), I wouldn't mind seeing more of Miss Logan.

~Katinka

Reviewer: BirgitDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60094Chapter: 5
I hadn't expected this at all! This chapter is one big surprise to me. I knew something was up with the mother, but I didn't expect this.

You've nicely tied up all the loose ends in the last chapter. And I wish every person in the world could be like your Remus.

"And you'll want to tell Poppy to start watching the lunar calendar again in a few years, just to get reacquainted."
Brilliant!

I'm very happy Remus can tell Bridget about the Wolfsbane Potion now, but on the other hand, we still don't know what Remus could have done if Bridget had been a Muggle. But this end wasn't forced at all. The clues were all there, although we didn't see them, so I'm really happy with the end.

Thanks for writing such a great Remus-story!

Reviewer: reenieDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60081Chapter: 5
THANK YOU it's wonderful to see such a good portrale of Lupin and it's great to see someone taking him serously as an advocate for people with his affliction
*climbing off the soap box* seriously i love it
keep up the good work

Reviewer: Sergeant MajoretteDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60080Chapter: 5
The End?? Whaddya mean, the end? More!!
(well, it was a lovely ending, at any rate...)

Reviewer: RosebethDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60055Chapter: 5
I think this story was wonderful! The interaction between Remus and the girl is heartwarming. He is always the teacher, isn't he? Job well done.

Reviewer: DSDragonDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60053Chapter: 5
I really liked this story. Are you planning a sequel? One, hopefully, where they tell Bridget and stuff?

Reviewer: belitaDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60052Chapter: 5
What a wonderful and hopeful end to your story!!
I had my suspicions about Bridget's mum having knowledge of the wizarding world, but I never expected that!

Thank you for writing such a charming and touching story!
: D

Reviewer: shellebelleDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60051Chapter: 5
Wow. Great ending to a great story! I'd love to see Bridget go off to Hogwarts *hint, hint* but I wouldn't blame you if you didn't do a sequel. The ending was perfect as is, leaving the rest of the story to the reader's imagination.

Reviewer: DonDate: 2003-11-15
Reviewid: 60029Chapter: 5
That was completely unexpected! And perfect! I did tink she would be a witch, through her mother! But you redeemed the mother nicely. Such a better way for a mother to go. Literally protecting her cub! But I had not thought about how he would need to go to Hogwarts like Remus! Such a nice touch about delivering the letter himself!

Your Minerva is great! The way she openly disapproves of Remus' actions, but still gives him support! She might have made a good marauder!

Sorry to go on, but I will miss this story! Favorite lines:
>>There was something horribly chilling about the presence of a completely still person in a wizard photograph. << Chilling indeed!

>>He let a slow smile spread across his face. "And he told you to get the answer for me, didn't he?"

She nodded brusquely, but gave him the tiniest hint of a smile in return. "I could have slapped him."<< I think this shows they have a nice relationship from his year teaching.

>>She chuckled and rolled her eyes. "There's still a bit of scoundrel in you, Remus Lupin. Take care of yourself. And come and see us sometime." With a sizzling hiss, the flames roared a little higher and Minerva's head disappeared. << This is nice for the interplay between the two, but also for the auditory imagery you spin to end the scene.

Great job! I know we will see more from you!

Reviewer: KellieDate: 2003-11-14
Reviewid: 60016Chapter: 5
I can't believe it ended right there! I wanted to see the conversation between Connor and Remus and see their reunion. And the OC lover in me wants to see Amanda go to Hogwarts.

But at least it's a happy ending. I suspected her mum was a witch, but I NEVER suspected her mum to be the daughter of a zealot. That was a neat twist. And poetic justice too, if you will.

Great story. I wish it wasn't over. *sigh*

Reviewer: ileneDate: 2003-11-14
Reviewid: 60009Chapter: 5
WOW! This is a great ending...and I never saw it coming. Oh, I'd figured out that Amanda must have had some Wizarding background, but the twist about her being the daughter of a werewolf hunter was brilliant. The last twist of Bridget being a witch also made sense, and provided a solution to Remus's dilemma without being too easy either, as he still has to deal with the MoM bureaucracy (has plot bunny of Remus meeting Umbridge). I also liked the way you incorporated bits of canon into this chapter, such as the death of DeWhit not making headlines due to the CoS story, and McGonagall mentioning the TWT. Speaking of McGonagall, this part was SO her: "Then consider it noted in the book." She looked from side to side and dropped her voice. "Because I've already noted it." The scene where Remus looks at the picture of the werewolf hunters exulting over the dead werewolf was very creepy, especially this part: "There was something horribly chilling about the presence of a completely still person in a wizard photograph." All in all, thanks for a great story!

Reviewer: belitaDate: 2003-11-12
Reviewid: 59868Chapter: 4
Your story is more wonderful and yet heartwrenching with every chapter.
>>Remus felt a rush of frustration. Why was there magic in the world if it didn't exist to help everybody? How could it be that he had lived his whole life in a realm of limitless possibilities just to find his hands tied when he needed magic most?<<
You can really feel the frustration and the almost desperation in this passage.

Conor referring to the wolf as "it" was very haunting.
>>I see diseases and I consult medical textbooks. I'm accustomed to treatments and cures and clinical statistics. Surely someone somewhere has come up with something that can help her<<
His desire to help his daughter shows through beautifully here.

You've got me on the edge of my seat waiting to see what happens next!

Reviewer: shellebelleDate: 2003-11-11
Reviewid: 59703Chapter: 4
Oh, this is such a good story! I can't wait to find out what happens next! Remus has a very hard decision to make. I hope it turns out all right.

Reviewer: chloeDate: 2003-11-11
Reviewid: 59662Chapter: 1
nice work chris! you're a fab writer. I thoroughly enjoyed reading your work :)

- chloe

Reviewer: FernWithyDate: 2003-11-10
Reviewid: 59560Chapter: 4
I can't get over how excellent this story is. Remus is a gentleman, the real thing. But what a spot he's in... he's right that they just don't know how things will react with Muggles--who knows whether or not the potion responds to magic in a wizard?--and it would be devastating to try it and have it not work.

Aaargh. I'd think that being bitten by a werewolf would qualify a person as having knowledge of the magical world at least as much as being the parent of a Muggle-born witch! But the Ministry hasn't proven itself adept at such logic, has it?

Reviewer: AuthorByNightDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59530Chapter: 4
This was/is really, really good!

Reviewer: atroposDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59490Chapter: 4
This is a great chapter. I loved the interaction between Remus and Bridget. So far this has mostly been a story of him caring for her, but now she is back on home territory we se some really touching moments with her trying to look after him in return - bringin him chew toys for Sirius, and telling him he can come back and visit her if he is feeling down. I also liked the mental image of Conor giving Sirius a check up - LOL! I can't wait to see what Remus plans to do now. Bring on Chapter 5.

Atropos

Reviewer: 123teeheeheeDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59431Chapter: 4
Ohmigosh I loooove this story!!! It's soo original and good and just keep writing it because otherwise I will....do something!

Reviewer: BirgitDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59421Chapter: 4
An highly interesting continuation of the story. I'm not sure what Remus is planning to do. But I like this chapter, and I'm glad the mystery of the injections is solved. And Remus is very in-character again!

Reviewer: LeelaDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59420Chapter: 4
Sorry, I forgot to say how much I adored this line - "Remus had always felt that there was something very decadent about waking up slowly."
It really struck a chord with me!
I love your writing style. It's so understated, yet brilliantly descriptive and poetic at the same time.

Reviewer: LeelaDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59419Chapter: 4
I am SO enjoying this story!
So was Bridget's mum a squib? The mention of her family coming from some sort of 'cult' made me wonder.

Reviewer: GwendolynDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59416Chapter: 4
What an amazing story! I love the dance references that you use for the chapter titles. I have wondered what would happen to our favorite werewolf in the event of a lunar eclipse, and I think that your idea is brillant. I have loved reading about Bridget. She reminds me a lot of myself when I was her age--always wanting to know everything and never wanting the fun to end. She has the love of a wonderful father, who's also a fabulously written character. And I think that your Remus is very close to the real Remus. Well done! I look forward to the next chapter.

Reviewer: KellieDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59405Chapter: 4
Excellent update!

You write with the expertise of someone who has been around children:

>>He enjoyed some toast and marmalade with his coffee, during which time Bridget shared the story of a puppy that her father had miraculously cured of something she called Ďmistemper.í<<

"Mistemper!" LOL. Brilliant.

This was cute as well:

>>Remus nodded, grinning and suspecting that there would a series of these one minute distractions and he would wind up sleeping in the same guest bed another night.<<

Your matter of fact style is both detached and engaging:

>>"No, not much. This is a room that knows what itís used for. Itís not pretending to be a place to rest." But even as he said it, he wondered if he had meant it as a compliment or a condemnation. The room was clinical and sterile. Even worse, it was emotionless. It knew what it was used for, all right; the trouble was that it didnít care. His mind drifted back to his own room, miles away. "Could use some curtains, though."<<

So, tragic. Had to grasp my tissue with that one. This one as well:

>>"Iíd settle for an unreasonable option. Her mother had a Ďreasonable optioní for her. Told me about it the day she left. She said it was the only way to cure it."

Remus winced. He had heard those words before and knew what they meant. "She canít have been serious. Not about her own daughter."<<

My next door neighbor's husband left when their daughter was paralyzed. So this reaction, while horrible, is unfortunately also very real.

This part really brought on the tears though:

>>Bridget rolled her eyes at her father. "Theyíre for Sirius. Thatís his dog. For whenever he comes home to stay."<<

And I hope he comes home to stay soon. *le sigh*

Excellent installment. Wish it was longer.

Kellie

Reviewer: DonDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59384Chapter: 4
Still wonderful! I really enjoy your Remus. Very realistic to my view of canon! I like the plot mechanism of making the Wolfsbane necessary. And there is, of course, no question as to Remus's actions regarding Ministry bans and Bridget. A pox on the Ministry!
I like this line:
>> He enjoyed some toast and marmalade with his coffee, during which time Bridget shared the story of a puppy that her father had miraculously cured of something she called Ďmistemper.í <<
Well done!

Reviewer: BirgitDate: 2003-11-04
Reviewid: 58680Chapter: 3
This is really a great story. I like stories about Remus interacting with children. Remus is a great person, and you're showing that very well.

I like the piece you start with about the eclipse and the effect of it on werewolves. When Remus woke up, for a moment I was afraid he had bitten someone, but luckily that was not the case.

I'm very interested in what will happen next. It's quite clear that there's something more than meets the eye with the injections. I'm also curious about Bridget's mother.

You did an excellent job with this story, and I'm looking forward to the next chapters!

Reviewer: KellieDate: 2003-11-03
Reviewid: 58627Chapter: 3
Bah! That figures. I was really getting into it and it stops. But I read that you've already submitted Ch. 4, so I'll be looking forward to it.

Really good story. Addicting. I'm really into it. Excellent characterizations, and marked by sorrow and tragedy, which is fitting for a piece dealing with this subject.

More later...

Reviewer: KellieDate: 2003-11-03
Reviewid: 58618Chapter: 1
Racing through to catch up with the Literary Discussion. Will review properly later in the week.

TMS

Reviewer: MaglorDate: 2003-10-26
Reviewid: 57925Chapter: 3
Excellent story. Your portrayal of Remus Lupin is spot on, and little Bridget is both believable and engaging.
I've reread this several times now, and I can't get enough of it. Exquisite balance between a plot-driven and a character-driven story, and you seem to know all about the economy of language.
Looking forward to read more!

Reviewer: belitaDate: 2003-10-25
Reviewid: 57864Chapter: 3
First off, my apologies! I could have sworn that I had left you a review before this, but I was sorely mistaken! I have been following your story since it was first posted and have been enjoying every moment of it.

I love the title of this chapter! It is so sweet, and fits quite well with the Remus and Bridget dynamic.

<<He walked over and bent down to hug her goodnight, only a little surprised when he felt the wet kiss planted on his cheek. As he left her room and followed Conor downstairs, he couldn't stop himself from touching the spot on his cheek where she had kissed him>>
Awww. This was just...perfect.

I can't wait to find out more about Bridget's mum (hopefully we will!), and about the sedatives.

Fantastic story!

Reviewer: shellebelleDate: 2003-10-24
Reviewid: 57746Chapter: 3
A wonderful story with great characters. The story of Bridget's family is intriguing. I wonder where you will go with it. And yes, zealots can be very dangerous, can't they?

I can't wait for the next chapter! Great work.

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2003-10-24
Reviewid: 57724Chapter: 3
You are a wonderful writer, JC! Now I'm very curious as to what is up with those injections...

Remus is such a nice guy, isn't he?

Reviewer: KatinkaDate: 2003-10-23
Reviewid: 57567Chapter: 3
>>"And I don't think I did anything bad the whole night."

Well, if that line just doesn't break your heart. You really capture a six year-old's way of thinking. All your characters, for that matter, seem vividly real.

>>Conor stepped away from her bedside and, instead of lying back down, Bridget reached towards Remus, her eyes still only half open. He walked over and bent down to hug her goodnight, only a little surprised when he felt the wet kiss planted on his cheek. As he left her room and followed Conor downstairs, he couldn't stop himself from touching the spot on his cheek where she had kissed him.

Awwwwwwwww!

>>He tried to imagine hearing it said by his mother with the same disgust...and was quite relieved that he could not.

Thank heavens for that!

The dialogue between Conor and Remus has a wonderful pacing and flow to it. WHY is Conor being so evasive? You've piqued my interest even further. ;)

Reviewer: DonDate: 2003-10-22
Reviewid: 57449Chapter: 3
Wonderful! The characterization of Remus is right on. And I like the way you handle the werewolf details. The plot is developing well, giving us details, enough to pique our interest, but not give anything away. I am looking forward to more!

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2003-10-22
Reviewid: 57440Chapter: 3
Your writing is so compelling that even though I have pretty much sworn off reading anything -- fan or normal fiction -- for the time being, before I knew it, I'd read this chapter too!

... and I read it through without pausing because your writing is *that* compelling! Not a single word wasted! Just beautifully told and full of heart. You manage to weave in such lovely delicate emotions in the telling of your story (that, I'll say again, doesn't even feel as if it's "being told" at all) that's also Pied Pipered me into following this intriguing plot of yours!

Now... the mystery. I'm just as curious to know more about the injections. Is he giving her a sedative? Like a tranquilizer for big game? And why wouldn't he feel like he could tell that to Remus? There must be something else going on. And I'm definitely sticking around to find out!

I'm so chuffed I found this story! This is fabulous, Chris!

Axelle

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2003-10-22
Reviewid: 57438Chapter: 2
I can't stop reading this story. Your characterisation of Remus is perfect in my mind -- and the situation he finds himself in here is not only unique in fan fiction (at least, from all that I've read), but also telling in that the nurturing side of him is explored and cast in a fresh light. And the dynamic between Remus and Bridget is so *real*. Very well-conveyed through their actions.

I also really appreciated this reflection of Albus's:

<<Remus was reminded of his conversation with Albus Dumbledore when he had gone to turn in his resignation. Dumbledore had shaken his hand and assured him that he understood, then he peered over his glasses, smiled warmly and said, "Remember, Remus, one need not stand in front of a classroom of students to find oneself in the position to be a teacher.">>

The entire scene in which he tells this little girl about his parents is masterfully done! Expositive without seeming so. And Bridget is so observant; I know children exactly like that. You know, I started to select quotes and realised that I wanted to cut and paste it all here because I loved it so much. But this paragraph in particular I adored:

<<He shook his head slowly, considering and then dismissing each of the responses that sprang immediately to mind. It seemed he had an entire mental catalog of things he didnít want to say, mostly things he wished werenít true. Finally, he simply said, "Iím sorry, Bridget.">>

I marvel at how you can convey so much so smoothly. This passage tugged at my heartstrings:

<<She was in a place that his comfort couldnít reach and he had no choice but to let her stay as long as she needed. He looked up into the sparkling darkness of the sky and wondered how long he had cried at his own realization, that long night at the hospital in Germany, when the mediwizards had told him the truth about his bite. He wondered how long his parents had cried and why the three of them had never all managed to cry together.

There had been a shred of that night in every full moon since then, just as there would perhaps be a glimmer of tonight in every future full moon for Bridget.>>

All right. It's official. You control my emotions as I read this. And I just about cried by the time I got here:

<<He hesitantly put his arm around her shoulders, assuming that was what she expected him to do, and was surprised to find that her closeness made him feel strong and yet vulnerable, as though he were both giving and receiving comfort at the same time. He wondered if this was what it was like to be a parent. He felt a deep pang of sorrow for James and Lily. They had never known this.>>

and this: "And since there was no one around to correct him, he took the liberty of changing the ending."

*sniff*

And the zealots! At first I laughed, but then upon realising what she meant... ow. But what a wonderful lesson about snap conclusions and generalisations.

Brilliant.

Reviewer: A.L. de SauveterreDate: 2003-10-22
Reviewid: 57435Chapter: 1
Wow! I'm just starting this story now because... well, because I'm awake at this ungodly hour... and I've been immediately SUCKED IN! Your narrative is compelling and full of wit. And you settle us in Remus's head without us even being aware that you're there -- no mean feat.

I love your turn of phrase and your descriptions of even gloomy things is wonderfully poetic, for example:

<<But it was a room filled with deceptions. The false window, an illusion of a tangible connection to the world outside. The deadbolts and padlocks, an illusion of security against the unpredictable nature of a beast. A cushioned bed with pillows, an illusion of comfort in a chamber of pain. Finally, Remus himself, an illusion of calm in a life of disorder.>>

The transformation scene is wonderfully visual but not overly-descriptive, and the melding of imagery and his thoughts is seamless and superb.

Bridget is so endearing! And this is beautifully observed:

<<"No, not so bad, really. Mostly I'm just tired. And hungry...but I suppose that's a good thing this morning. What about you?" Her tone was nonchalant, but she glanced guiltily at him, as though afraid she had said something wrong.

He nodded solemnly. There was, after all, a grim satisfaction in the feeling of an empty stomach after a full moon. He had already felt it himself this morning. But it was sad to see that resignation on the face of someone so young.>>

Such a lovely (albeit sad) moment between them. You can see that she's grown up rather hurriedly for a six-year old because of her affliction.

<<He put on his best reassuring smile, the same one that had frequently found itself pointing in the general direction of Neville Longbottom last year. >>

Awww! I love your gentlemanly Remus -- he contrasts well with (without being disconnected from) the savage wolf.

This is a terrific line: "Remus accepted this answer with no request for explanation. Instinct was an advantage they both shared."

Your writing is filled with wonderful warm images that linger, including the very last line: "... with the afternoon sun on their backs."

Gorgeous! I'm looking forward to reading more.

Axelle

Reviewer: T a m i r a L u n eDate: 2003-10-22
Reviewid: 57403Chapter: 3
Cool! Why doesn't he tell them he's a wizard? I think the ministry'd understand!Or DUmbledore? He'd get it too! Oooh you make me want to read more soooo much!

Reviewer: Kate LynnDate: 2003-10-21
Reviewid: 57315Chapter: 3
I love how you characterize Lupin. It's very fitting with what we know, and the expansions on his character that you have make sense. I'm intrigued about Connor as well...you do OCs nicely, and the overall writing is very smooth and has perfect settings. Overall, I'm enjoying this fic immensely.

Kate Lynn

Reviewer: ivy & GracieDate: 2003-10-21
Reviewid: 57297Chapter: 3
wow; what a sweet and touching story, and so beautifully written! love the part where remus is telling bridget the bedtime story: "and since there was no one around to correct him, he took the liberty of changing the ending."

conor and little bridget are so real! we hope to read many more chapters about them. hurray for jiminy c!

Reviewer: SabreDate: 2003-10-21
Reviewid: 57286Chapter: 3
Still loving this story, but now I'm doubly interested in the injections Conor's giving Bridget! And I can't wait for Remus to tell them he's a wizard - is he going to do that? I hope so... Anyway, I'm really enjoying this, keep up the great work!

Reviewer: LeelaDate: 2003-10-21
Reviewid: 57281Chapter: 3
I am loving this story! Can't wait for the next installment. :~)

Reviewer: PaulineDate: 2003-10-21
Reviewid: 57257Chapter: 3
You also have an enviable talent for writing dialogue which flows naturally. I was drawn in to the conversation between the two men - it felt like I was siting around the table.

Bridget has been such a delight that I almost missed her this chapter. But, in her absence, I found the Logan's story fascinating. I'm looking forward to finding out more about Amanda and about those mysterious injections.

Reviewer: Three Sickles ShortDate: 2003-10-21
Reviewid: 57246Chapter: 3
Ooo. Conor did avoid the injection question, didn't he? I'm quite interested to see why.

Was Amanda a witch? I'm starting to wonder.

Still really enjoying the story, and looking forward to seeing how it all works out.

TSS

Reviewer: SamsamDate: 2003-10-17
Reviewid: 56835Chapter: 2
Wow! This story is great! I'm really interested. Keep it up!

Reviewer: jklbDate: 2003-10-15
Reviewid: 56565Chapter: 2
Somehow Remus+child(ren) always seems to be a great combination in stories. Remus is great with Bridget--which is a very good thing because I have a very bad feeling that there is a reason her daddy hasn't come looking for her yet.

Reviewer: *Gin*Date: 2003-10-03
Reviewid: 55346Chapter: 2
*Dude, keep writing this. It's very ... I dunno, very touching?! Very good!*

Reviewer: ileneDate: 2003-10-02
Reviewid: 55245Chapter: 2
Good going on the story! I like the touch about Bridget's father being a Muggle veterinarian, as well as his using the tranquilizers as a remedy for Bridget. The more serious parts, such as where Bridget says there's "no good word" for being a werewolf, and the part where Remus tries to correct her impression about witches were also good, though I wondered if Bridget was old enough to understand the word "generalization". And it is interesting what the "zealots" would be...I can understand if they were wizards, but since Muggles don't even know werewolves exist, what are Bridget and possibly her father afraid of? You raise interesting issues, and I'm looking forward to your next installment.

Reviewer: KatinkaDate: 2003-10-02
Reviewid: 55128Chapter: 2
You must be doing your job well, because just as I was thinking that Bridget HAD to know Remus was a werewolf, she said, "Youíre the only other person like me that I ever met." You have a subtle, controlled touch in addressing the angsty elements of the story, which I appreciate. :)

Bridget continues to be a darling character, full of life and spirit, despite the burden that a child her age shouldn't have to bear:

>>"I still think itís pretty. I donít have to stop thinking itís pretty, do I?" She took a step away from him, still holding his hand, and spun herself around in a circle. "Daddy and I sometimes go outside and dance in the back garden when the moon is mostly full. He says it's like laughing right in the wolfís face."<<

And this paragraph is absolutely lovely. So poignant:

>>He heard a heavy exhale and knew she had fallen asleep almost immediately. But it was still a wonderful story and he didnít want to stop telling it, so he lowered his voice and told the rest of it to the swaying branches of the willow tree. And since there was no one around to correct him, he took the liberty of changing the ending.<<

Remus just can't help being a teacher, can he? I love his gentleness and compassion with Bridget.

I look forward to more of this! :)

~Katinka

Reviewer: EurydiceDate: 2003-10-02
Reviewid: 55081Chapter: 2
I think the 2 chapters posted so far are beautifully written and I am keen to find out more about both Bridget and her father - dealing with having a werewolf for a daughter if you are a Muggle sounds like a pretty difficult job to me so I'm hoping we get to meet him before too long. I also very much like your characterisation of Remus. He comes across as compassionate, intellectually sharp and a born teacher, which is how I have always pictured him.

My favourite lines are these though <<He heard a heavy exhale and knew she had fallen asleep almost immediately. But it was still a wonderful story and he didnít want to stop telling it, so he lowered his voice and told the rest of it to the swaying branches of the willow tree. And since there was no one around to correct him, he took the liberty of changing the ending.>> Simple, but very poignant (sniff).

Reviewer: KatinkaDate: 2003-10-01
Reviewid: 54988Chapter: 1
I'm intrigued! Even in his brief appearance, Elias registers as a kind and sympathetic character, and I REALLY like Bridget. As the mum of a little girl myself, I just want to give her hugs, soup, and a dress! The poor dear! You let her Muggleness be known in a subtle, natural way. How awful to not even have a proper knowledge of what's happening to her each month.

Thanks, also, for a wonderful Remus characterization. I found this paragraph particularly poignant:

>>But it was a room filled with deceptions. The false window, an illusion of a tangible connection to the world outside. The deadbolts and padlocks, an illusion of security against the unpredictable nature of a beast. A cushioned bed with pillows, an illusion of comfort in a chamber of pain. Finally, Remus himself, an illusion of calm in a life of disorder.<<

I look forward to more!

~Katinka

Reviewer: SarahDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54945Chapter: 2
Chris! Excellent job! I am so taken with the story so far. I love your writing style and it is so easy to read. Very imaginative! Can't wait for the next chapter...

Reviewer: JiminyC to Mariann & Tamira LuneDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54910Chapter: 1
Thanks for your comments!

Just to clarify, the opening paragraph of Chapter One (from the Mediwizard's Guide) explains that a lunar eclipse can have the effect of making remedies (like the Wolfsbane Potion) ineffective, thus illustrating why both Remus & Bridget were uncontrolled for their transformations.

Thanks, though, for letting me know that bit was unclear. Appreciate the reviews!

Reviewer: LeelaDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54906Chapter: 2
Ooo, I can't wait to see where you go with this! Seriously, I'm excited. Looking forward to the next bit.

Reviewer: MariannDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54899Chapter: 1
Somehow you seem to have missed the part where Remus explains the way the wolfsbane potion works. It calms him and he keeps his human mind. So if the potion is okay he certainly wouldn't feel the bloodlust, hunger or rage you describe. Or you forgot to mention that the potion he drinks at the beginning of your story is somehow botched...

Otherwise it starts very well.

Mariann

Reviewer: SabreDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54857Chapter: 2
Oh this is wonderfull! Such a great idea, executed so well! So Bridgets dad doses her with tranqs to keep her calm - what an imaginitive solution to muggle werewolf troubles...Arthur would be amazed. This is beautifully written, and you've got Remus spot on, well done! Can't wait to read more!

Reviewer: SabreDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54855Chapter: 1
Oh, I'm loving this so far! A muggle werewolf child, so intriguing...must rush on to the next chapter!!

Reviewer: NiaDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54848Chapter: 2
Wow....another way-above-average chapter, with some real gems in it:

"He tried his best reassuring smile, randomly recalling that Sirius had once referred to it as his ĎYou-Must-Be-Mistaken-Headmasterí smile." Perfect Remus...! and

"...surprised to find that her closeness made him feel strong and yet vulnerable..." beautiful, accurate description of such a moment....and

"There had been a shred of that night in every full moon since then, just as there would perhaps be a glimmer of tonight in every future full moon for Bridget..." perceptive, profound, and poignant.

Looking forward to the next installment.

Nia

Reviewer: Three Sickles ShortDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54840Chapter: 2
A muggle werewolf--what a brilliant concept! And she's just wonderful. I like seeing Remus interacting with a younger child. He's still very much in Teacher Mode, but he does a good job of adapting to the age of his "student." I'm glad Bridget and Remus have found one another, and I'm looking forward to seeing how their adventure plays out.

Reviewer: RosebethDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54833Chapter: 2
This is wonderful. I can't wait for more, please keep posting!

Reviewer: Tamira luneDate: 2003-09-28
Reviewid: 54639Chapter: 1
Wow that was a great begining. The only thing is, JK said in the third book that the woflsbane potion allowed Lupin to keep his mind when he transformed.Keep writing!

Reviewer: NiaDate: 2003-09-26
Reviewid: 54446Chapter: 1
A really nice bit of writing! I think you've captured Remus--"Remus himself, an illusion of calm in a life of disorder." Excellent!

Please continue as soon as possible...

Reviewer: The Sergeant MajoretteDate: 2003-09-26
Reviewid: 54440Chapter: 1
Please don't abandon this story! I look forward to many chapters.

Reviewer: ileneDate: 2003-09-26
Reviewid: 54392Chapter: 1
Hmm, this is an interesting premise. I like your Remus, and I liked the way he slowly comes to the realization that Bridget's a Muggle. I am curious as to what exactly her situation is. She's a Muggle, and apparently neither her or her parents know of the wizarding world or of magical creatures, so how are her parents dealing with having their daughter be turned into a werewolf, if it's something they didn't even know actually existed until then? Has anyone from the MoM been to visit? I'm quite intrigued.

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