The Sugar Quill
Sugar Quill Community
- S.P.E.W (SQ History)

Fan Fiction and Writing
- Ask Madam Pince
(Story Submissions)
- Floo Network (Links)

Forums

Administrative Links

Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 115

Reviewer: RainbowDate: 2005-10-11
Reviewid: 134289Chapter: 14
This is random, but . . . is Lola Neder related to Peter Neder?

Reviewer: CelinaDate: 2005-09-22
Reviewid: 133029Chapter: 15
Wonderful. Amazing. You've got me practically as hooked on this as the real J.K. Rowling books!!

I definitely think you should be trying to write stuff of your own, which you could publish, though. That is, if you're not doing that already. You're just too good!

Thanks for sharing such an enjoyable story. :)

Reviewer: DanielleDate: 2005-03-16
Reviewid: 116762Chapter: 1
Hi, I think your story is very good, and from the 103 stories I have read so far, I will place yours second to the After The End one. This is a very well written story, and I love storys about James and Sirius. Well Done :D

Reviewer: AdrienneDate: 2004-12-29
Reviewid: 109091Chapter: 15
Just thought of something else I wanted to say, two things: I like that Remus isn't a baby. His attitude in the morning, how he tells people to shut up and stuff... awesome. In some other fics he's just so GENTLE, which is nice, but this seems more legit for an eleven year old. Something that I don't like but forgot about because most of this story is so good: Snape being a sleeze bag? Hitting on a girl?? At eleven??? I always thought of Snape as being kind of introverted, hence the heavy sarcasm and bad attitude to keep people from getting too close, etc. etc. Just a thought. However, this is your story, so if you want to make Snape a slimeball... I'll still hate you for it. But I'll also deftly ignore it and enjoy your characterization of Remus and Peter, so I suppose I can tolerate it.

Reviewer: AdrienneDate: 2004-12-29
Reviewid: 109090Chapter: 15
Ha ha, so wonderful! Let's see, the snowball fight was very good. I've never been in one, but that seemed like what it would be like, good spontaneity. What else... there were a lot of genuinely funny pieces of dialouge in here, not that I can remember any to quote at you, sorry. Although I thought at times it was too advanced for eleven year olds, and that maybe some of them were too interested in the opposite sex. They're only eleven, doesn't that stuff kick in more around late twelve/early thirteen? Still, quite funny. I like Peter recognizing that it's a lot easier to say you would sacrifice yourself for someone else than to actually do it, very appropriate given what happens later in the story. I like Remus. I think the way he handles his crush is the most realistic out of the others in terms of dealing with girls, very sweet and slightly confused, not overly hormonal like Sirius. Although it almost seems as though Sirius is repeating things he's heard older people/kids say and trying to show how suave he is that way. This was really so good, that spider attack was surprising, suspenseful, but not out of place. Sorry I'm rambling. I really like your writing, easy to read, varied sentence structure, excellent word choice. Thank you! Now on to year two!

Reviewer: rhiDate: 2004-11-05
Reviewid: 103567Chapter: 1
very well written. keep up the good work

Reviewer: CineDate: 2004-11-02
Reviewid: 103317Chapter: 15
Really nice story! :D I love the way you write, and you do manage to catch personalites pretty nicely ^_^ I still hate Peter for what he's going to do in 10 years, though. *shudders*

Reviewer: Geena WatersDate: 2004-11-01
Reviewid: 103179Chapter: 3
Nice work. Great job on the prank and that first little run in with Lily and James, lol. Once a Marauder always a Marauder....with the exception of Peter turned evil Pettigrew. Great job.

*Geena

Reviewer: Geena WatersDate: 2004-11-01
Reviewid: 103168Chapter: 1
This is great! I can't wait to read more but that will have to wait, unfortunately, because I have work to do, lol.

*Geena

Reviewer: ChristineDate: 2004-10-27
Reviewid: 102650Chapter: 15
I love the concept of this story, I've always wanted to hear more about the marauders! My only complaint is that they seem to know extremely advanced magic for their age. For instance, they learn cheering charms (not learned until third year in HP) and Sirius already knows the summoning charm, which in the books isn't taught until fourth year. Other than that, it's a great story, especially the relationship between the first year guys and girls (hilarious!)

Reviewer: giant squidDate: 2004-10-02
Reviewid: 100216Chapter: 1
i love this story i hope you write another one. THIS STORY ROX MY SOX!!!!!!

Reviewer: areeba kamalDate: 2004-08-23
Reviewid: 98349Chapter: 15
hi,i am areeba and im a major hp fan. i dont really give comments or replies but your fic was so good that i had to. please do write more. cause i just love it, seriously. takecare! Bye.

Reviewer: WandOfRosalindDate: 2004-08-21
Reviewid: 98115Chapter: 5
Erm...I thought CoMC was only for third years and above?

Reviewer: natrahDate: 2004-08-18
Reviewid: 97799Chapter: 15
hey i like it when you wrote bout how peter was sorted!
Overall, BRILLIANT!!

Reviewer: kDate: 2004-08-11
Reviewid: 96687Chapter: 4
Me and my friends love this athors stories!!Please write more!!!

sencerly yours
frog2

Reviewer: Lumos P. NoxDate: 2004-08-05
Reviewid: 95963Chapter: 12
Your writing is so KEWL! I cant wait for you to continue writing. I was wondering when James is going to get his invisibility cloak? And when James is going to become seeker? When will they find out about Remus? I also wanted to tell you not to forget about the mirror that Sirius gives Harry in the 5th book he says that he and James used it during detentions maybe it can be a chistmas gift or something? I dont know, all I can say is that I cant wait! This is keeping me ocupied while i wait for the 6th book to come out. I just wanted to tell you to continue writing because you have a lot of people hanging on your every word ;)
Lumos P. Nox

Reviewer: GenesseDate: 2004-08-04
Reviewid: 95826Chapter: 1
You're story is great! I love the MWPP era and ickle first years are great! I love the part about Sirius being afraid of cows, and the Lunatic Lily Laugh! And I see that you're already started on year two. I have a great need to see more Sirius.

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-08-04
Reviewid: 95672Chapter: 15
May I first say congratulations for finishing your story! You did a great job with imagining the personalities and the types of adventures which belong to these boys.

There were several things I liked in this chapter: all the foreshadowing--Sirius and the stick--the Voldy talk--Peter's grappling with courage.

You ended much like JKR: you have closure--but also hints of things to come. "little rat" but it is still "bright sunshine."

Reviewer: Purple Eyed WeasleyDate: 2004-08-04
Reviewid: 95636Chapter: 15
Yeeeeaaaaa! So good! Now, onto the sequel!

Reviewer: TabithaDate: 2004-08-03
Reviewid: 95523Chapter: 15
are you gonna go on with the rest of the hogwarts yrs? i hope so. I have had mucho fun reading this. PLEASE! continue with the stories. please....

Reviewer: Avada KedavraDate: 2004-08-03
Reviewid: 95499Chapter: 15
HEEEEEEELLO!!!!! they MUST find out about Wolfie!!!! DONT FORGET THE WOLF!!! i think Remus is the coolest Maurauder, then Sirius, then James the Peter-the-Bastard! :-)

Avada Kedavra

Reviewer: KateDate: 2004-08-03
Reviewid: 95374Chapter: 15
I LOVE IT! Are you gonna make a sequal? Cause You really should!

Reviewer: ChristinaDate: 2004-08-02
Reviewid: 95349Chapter: 1
i hope that you are considering writing year 2 !!!i am hooked on this story!!!

Reviewer: Avada KedavraDate: 2004-08-02
Reviewid: 95345Chapter: 14
ironic, how my name, and your story come togehter, aint it? anyway, cant WAIT til chapter 15 is in, been following this one since chapter 10! luvin it! this 1 is one of my FAVS!

Avada Kedavra

Reviewer: Avada KedavraDate: 2004-07-31
Reviewid: 94958Chapter: 14
when are they going to figure Remus out??!! i LOVE this, keep it going PLEASE!!!!!!

Avada Kedavra

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-31
Reviewid: 94921Chapter: 14
Oh, the plot thickens. It's not just about school and fun is it? Putting in the Malfoy and Black connections also added to the sinister dimensions of this chapter.

I liked the grousing after exams--just like Ron!

Reviewer: TabithaDate: 2004-07-31
Reviewid: 94896Chapter: 14
I absolutely love this story. I look for updates all the time. I can't wait to see what else happens. keep it up!

Reviewer: 13 and UnderDate: 2004-07-31
Reviewid: 94824Chapter: 13
i love this, Remus and Melissa, HA HAAA!!! i love it all! keep writing, i LOVE this one!

13 and Under

Reviewer: potterloverDate: 2004-07-30
Reviewid: 94788Chapter: 13
is there more coming? please please..very good story..i've never liked prequels before but this one was actually interesting..

Reviewer: Purple Eyed WeasleyDate: 2004-07-30
Reviewid: 94736Chapter: 13
Oh, please keep on going. Post really really soon, this is soooo good.
That made me wanna crack up out loud or punch James when he thought about Remus being a werewolf. I thought he was gonna figure it out, and then he pulled a typical Potter and thought about Quidditch. Ah well. Next chapter, right? Anyway, please post soon.

Reviewer: HaylieDate: 2004-07-29
Reviewid: 94657Chapter: 1
Chapter 1:
Fairly nice, i do admire quite a bit of it....but it follows rather closely to the lines of Harry and Ron's first year, doesnt it?

Example:
<The hat barely touched her head before it screamed out, “Slytherin!”> Just like Draco, correct?

<If you’re sure, better be… “Gryffindor!”> Also what the sorting hat said to Harry?

And one more thing- judging from what we know of Sirius' mom, isnt it rather unlikely she'd call him "Siri-wiri-poo"?

I'm not saying i dont like the story, not at all (i loved the sorting hat song)...i just thought i'd point these things out.

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-29
Reviewid: 94620Chapter: 13
Some great lines which make this story uniquely yours.
<"Honestly? On your mother’s wands?"

"Should both of them be hexed until they croak like frogs," Peter said solemnly. >
<upcoming O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s that the Astronomy Tower was rather neglected these days.> And it's spring--how unfair!
<Remus decided right then and there that he could stare at her smiling sleepily forever> owww--sweet

I really liked James's stream of consciousness in the astronomy tower and how he skirted the truth about Remus. I almost expected him to look out on the grounds and see him transform into a werewolf.
Only four weeks to go with year one--I wonder what you have planned for these boys (and girls)? Can't wait to read it!

Reviewer: EmmaDate: 2004-07-29
Reviewid: 94511Chapter: 1
I've only had time to read the 1st chapter, but so far the story seems exellent, The characters are portrayed perfectly.

Reviewer: Charlotte CampbellDate: 2004-07-27
Reviewid: 94122Chapter: 12
I think that your whole story was great but you need to pay attention to grammer. Of course I am not that good at grammer myself but still.... I think you should really write more chapters and would be a wondrful writer if you were professional.

Reviewer: hannaliceDate: 2004-07-26
Reviewid: 94051Chapter: 12
This has to one of the best Mauraders stories I've ever come across. The bit with Mrs. Norris was just great, and I was holding my sides with the "Lunatic Lilly Laugh" Too funny. This is how I'd want those four to be!

Reviewer: ivy & GracieDate: 2004-07-26
Reviewid: 94021Chapter: 12
Aha! Lily and James are going to be serving detentions together in the Great Hall! Can't wait to see how you get around a hall full of remedial first-years....

Some great exclamations:
"Son of a sea dragon..."
"Great Merlin's trousers..."

We've never been fans of MWPP stories before, but your story is winning us over!

Reviewer: SandraDate: 2004-07-23
Reviewid: 93738Chapter: 12
Getting good, so what's happening next. Please updat soon. And I can't believe James lost a few toes. HA, HA, HA that's rich.

Reviewer: ~Pheonix~I know I spelled that wrongDate: 2004-07-23
Reviewid: 93704Chapter: 10
i've read the whole thing a million times, but this is my favorite chapter because of Remus:

"Pete!" James yelled.

"Mushve mishishd oo," Sirius said with a mouthful of toothpaste.

"Huh?" Pete replied, making a face.

"We missed you!" James translated for him.

"Would you shut up!" Remus roared from his bed. The three chuckled.

"No," Peter yelled back at him. A second later Remus’s head was poking out of the foot of his bed.

"Peter?"

"No, Peeves. Of course it’s Peter," James yelped and Sirius ran back to the bathroom to spit out his toothpaste.

Remus, still looking dazed from sleep, mumbled, "Hey Pete. Glad you’re back. Shut up." And crawled back under the covers.

"Nice to know some things will never change." Peter grinned.

Mainly the part with : Glad your back. Shut up. : from Remus. GO LUPIN!!!! lol

~Pheonix~I know I spelled that wrong

Reviewer: ~Pheonix~I know I spelled that wrongDate: 2004-07-22
Reviewid: 93592Chapter: 12
come on, next chapter please!!!!! thats great, its nice to know SOMEBODY actually updates here! YAY!! cant wait til the next chapter!

~Pheonix~I know I spelled that wrong

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-22
Reviewid: 93551Chapter: 12
That's so cool that Lily was good at transfiguration as well as the boys. It makes you wonder if she was also an unregistered animagus. McGonagall was just as she should be. I also liked how the boys discovered the tunnel to Honeydukes and kept thinking they were headed to Azkaban. I also liked your exclamations: son of a sea dragon, Great Merlin's trousers, etc . . .

And of course the cat is mad about "the hair thing." :)

Reviewer: readerDate: 2004-07-20
Reviewid: 93355Chapter: 11
Write more? PLEASE!!

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-19
Reviewid: 93101Chapter: 11
Lily and James's powers of invention for pranks (and therefore *your* powers of invention) are amazing in their scale and scope. It makes sense that Lily would be that good at magic and that James would overcome his laziness to try to keep up with her. Good practice for both of them. I like how Remus is your voice of reason in all of the craziness--admonishing Sirius for growing up too quickly, for instance. And yet another fun chapter title!

Reviewer: KathrynDate: 2004-07-19
Reviewid: 93099Chapter: 11
That was SO funny! I can't wait to read more if you do any more! You are as good as or if not more 1 of the best writes to write a finfic that i've ever seen! Some of you'r ideas are so amazing and funny it made it even better then the amazing story it already is!
PLEASE keep writing!

Reviewer: ChristinaDate: 2004-07-19
Reviewid: 93041Chapter: 11
Oh my goodness you are a fantastic writing you are J.k Rowling good (believe me that is a GREAT accomplishment)I think you should publish this somehow!!! I thank you for writing this story
~christina~:)

Reviewer: PheonixDate: 2004-07-18
Reviewid: 92944Chapter: 11
omg, that is so funny!!! i was busting out myself.! i love, cant wait til u add more (if u do, and i sure hope u do!!! its AWSOME!!!)

Reviewer: Cheesy MonkeyDate: 2004-07-17
Reviewid: 92818Chapter: 10
Squee! I really like this so far and I hope you post a new chapter soon. I might end up just toddling over to FFN and reading the non-betaed version. Anywho, keep up the excellent work! Cheers! -Cheesy

Reviewer: ivy & GracieDate: 2004-07-17
Reviewid: 92767Chapter: 3
and the Marauders are born! Great explanation. It's late at night, and the best we can do is offer some random comments:

*Frank and Rebecca *are* twins!
*Lily wears reading glasses: huzzah for girls in glasses!
*Remus thinks Melissa is "easy on the eyes:" That wouldn't be like any other Melissa we know, would it? **eye Jo's e-mail address** ;0)

Our favorite line:
<<Remus smiled. He was once again struck by this concept of friendship.>> Followed by the description of their various handwritings; such different boys, yet such a great team!

And you almost make us want to like Peter....

Reviewer: ivy & GracieDate: 2004-07-16
Reviewid: 92742Chapter: 1
we've just started this fic, but what a treat! It's nice to get things from Peter's POV and to realize he's just a little insecure boy at the beginning....But then the Sorting Hat (nice song, BTW) gives us some insight into his character:
<<There’s quite a bit of cunning in here, oh my yes. Slytherin would be just the place to put that to use. What’s this? You don’t want to be a Slytherin?>>

This line is particularly heartbreaking (after Sirius mentions that Hufflepuffs are loyal):

<<“I’m going to be a Hufflepuff,” Peter said and pressed his balled up hands to his cheeks, resting his elbows on his knees. “I know it.”>>

We like seeing some familiar names: We're banking on Alice Smith hooking up with Frank Longbottom. And what's this? Is Frank a twin? **spot twins from a mile away**

Some favorite lines:
<<"The Forbidden Forest is, of course, forbidden.” As soon as the word forbidden had exited his lips James and Sirius exchanged very excited looks>> and

<<Sirius and James exchanged another look and Peter knew that if there was any way to run a house into a negative amount of points, the two of them were going to find it.>>

Now we can't wait to see how they'll meet the fourth Marauder: On to the rest of the story!

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-16
Reviewid: 92721Chapter: 10
Oh, nice title--very sweet without being cloying. I also liked Remus in this chapter too--thinking about Alice's privacy. The last line sums up what it is to have some normalcy after high drama. Very nice. I feel like I know "your boys." now.

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-16
Reviewid: 92718Chapter: 9
So we had two pranks--intentional and unintentional. A bald Mrs. Norris makes me think of Dr. Evil--very fitting for the marauders. I really like your Remus--for example, just the calm way he accepted Sirius's "relationship" with "“You miss a few weeks of school…” He shook his head but didn’t manage to hide his grin. “Well, which girl has officially lost her mind? Or were you brewing insanity potions this past week?”

Wonderful characterization.

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-16
Reviewid: 92704Chapter: 8
The apology and making up with Remus and Sirius was well done. Nicely understated. I like that James is the clueless one about girls. So often he's the suave hero. There prank should be fun. It's great to see boys as boys in fan fic.

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-16
Reviewid: 92696Chapter: 7
I liked the password. And this line especially:

"Friendship and love can do wonders always. They can even impossible odds. He never forgot those words."

Blood is such a re-curring image in the series (and now that we know the title of book six, more important than ever.) I see you picked up on that in your story.

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-07-16
Reviewid: 92693Chapter: 6
Just getting caught up. You really had the tension cranked during the attack and afterwards. The boys's concern and fear were realistic and touching.

The aftermath with the Gryffindor boys and girls was well done- people do veer from sad to silly at moments like these.

Reviewer: Ted HortonDate: 2004-07-03
Reviewid: 90323Chapter: 9
Amazing. I've been skimming over the whole site, and this story really sticks out. In a good way. I can't wait for the next installment, and I hope there are many more.

Reviewer: SandraDate: 2004-06-14
Reviewid: 87060Chapter: 9
I must say, this story is bloody brilliant and down right funny. I love how you have potrayed the main characters. I just love the marauders. Please continue to update, I'll be checking in :).

Reviewer: SandraDate: 2004-06-14
Reviewid: 87012Chapter: 1
I salute you in saying, that this is a very good written story. And to plese continue writting. It is very interesting and makes me want to continue reading to find out what happens.

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-06-09
Reviewid: 86564Chapter: 4
I'm enjoying your story--thought I'd review another chapter. I'm enjoying your characterization of Peter:
"<Peter never ceased to surprise him. It was almost like he didn’t know when to lie and when to tell the truth and his mind often mixed up the signals">

Lily sounds like Hermione here! Lol.
<"You say that like it’s a bad thing,” Lily said">

And you have some cute one-liners like this one:
<"So I hexed the hormones right out of him">

Reviewer: JoDate: 2004-06-05
Reviewid: 86027Chapter: 9
Wow - what an epic. I've just spent about 2 hours reading this from start to finish, i was hooked. Brilliant, really, really good. Anymore chapters coming up?

Reviewer: catsmeatDate: 2004-05-21
Reviewid: 83864Chapter: 1
An interesting start. You seem to have made a fair stab at portraying
the three. Thought there are a lot of Americanisms in the chapter, which
are offputting after a while.

You made Wormtail a Muggleborn... I can see how that might work, but pulling it
off convincingly, in the light of subsequent history will be quite a trick.

Reviewer: St. MargaretsDate: 2004-05-21
Reviewid: 83760Chapter: 3
Well I've gotten to chapter three, Jo. You really have the dopey eleven year old boy vibe down. And I really like all the small details about each character--like their handwriting, how they keep their things in order (or not), if they are a morning person (or not). Very well thought out.

I always get sad when I read these Marauders stories or James and Lily stories because I know what happens to them. It kind of adds something extra. I'll keep reading and reviewing as I work my way through your story.

Reviewer: NestDate: 2004-05-19
Reviewid: 83446Chapter: 9
Ahh!!! What happened to your chapter!? Please fix it soon, I'm looking foward to reading this chapter (but I don't have that much time right now, otherwise I would actually attempt to read it like this).

Reviewer: M&M loverDate: 2004-05-11
Reviewid: 82140Chapter: 8
I loved your story! Please write a sequel!!*falls on her knees* PLEASE!!!!!

Reviewer: BrigantiaDate: 2004-05-09
Reviewid: 81825Chapter: 8
I really like this story! The character development is great, and the pacing is excellent. The Griffindor Five's guide to boys is a perfect example - funny, believable, and setting the stage for further action while telling a lot about the characters. Very well done. I just wish it were finished so I wouldn't have to wait for the next chapter!

Reviewer: Phoenix BlackDate: 2004-02-23
Reviewid: 72057Chapter: 8
Ooh! More! More!! More!!! ... okay... that doesn't sound quite right.

Reviewer: DogstarfanDate: 2004-02-21
Reviewid: 71636Chapter: 1
WOW! I love your story, and I can't wait to read more!!!!!! You made my three favorite characters exactly like I imagine them (Sirius, Remus and Jamsey-boy) and they sound so real! They sound like my best friends and I talking at school. I especially love the detail on Sirius, how he doesn't seem like the observant type, but he knows everything that's going on with his best friends... and how he finds a way to help Peter! I love it, I love it, I love it.... write more soon, please? :D

Reviewer: JulieDate: 2004-02-17
Reviewid: 71080Chapter: 8
Yay, another chapter! And Remus is awake! :)

Sorry I can't do a detailed review today. Great chapter as usual; I love watching Sirius "analyzing" the girls. Keep up the great work!

Reviewer: miss_lily_lupinDate: 2004-02-16
Reviewid: 71059Chapter: 8
Haha! Sirius is now a Seer. How interesting!

“Jamesy boy,” Sirius said. “I worry about you sometimes.”

As do I. As do I. *laughs* I loved the ending of this chapter. Very original. The conversation is priceless! And Remus woke up! YES! I'm so happy! I was getting so worried there... Now Pete needs to wake up and pronto!

Reviewer: kitzamaeveDate: 2004-02-16
Reviewid: 71003Chapter: 1
hmm. nice story. I think its a bit odd portraying Peter as a muggleborn.. I mean how does that set with Voldie-poo and crew? anyhow. nice story nonetheless

Reviewer: kerryDate: 2004-02-16
Reviewid: 70998Chapter: 1
This story is BRILLIANT!!! i love it. i wish we knew more about James and his crew from JKR but this was great.

Reviewer: MaryannDate: 2004-02-15
Reviewid: 70879Chapter: 8
I really love this story, it's very, very good. So far, I don't see Lily hating James as much as she seems to in their 5th year... When and how is that going to happen, I wonder? Update soon, please! :-)

Reviewer: white rose raindropsDate: 2004-02-08
Reviewid: 69893Chapter: 7
OMG! I LOVED IT! Ack! What is going to happen! Poor Petey! Poor Remmy! They're the coolest! *hugs*

Great Job. I loved the flow of the whole story, though I did begin to wonder when that bet was going to come into place. PERFECT IDEA! You did a really good job with this chapter. Keep up the good work (and SOON)!

Reviewer: PadfootsAngelDate: 2004-02-05
Reviewid: 69625Chapter: 7
I LOVE IT,I LOVE IT,I LOVE IT I`m BEGGING u *getting down on my knees* PLEASE,PLEASE,PLEASE write more I`m an addicte of ur writting
PadfootsAngel

Reviewer: JulieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69430Chapter: 4
I just realized I never reviewed the first four chapters. Since I was just thinking I should reread them to remind me of the background, I took this opportunity...

I like the way all first years get scared by stories of how they’re Sorted. Fighting a troll is OBVIOUSLY what they’d do to 11-year-olds to see which House they should be in, after all. Great pull from canon.

And Remus sleeping on the train! *BAG*

“Well, I was told to take requests, should anyone actually ask, that’s quite a rare occurrence though…” Now, THAT’S really interesting. I would expect that many of the students would go into the Sorting with some kind of request, or at least an idea of where they’d like to be. Nice parallels with Harry.

You do details so well! I like the first morning scene – determining who’s a morning person. I can SO see James and Sirius jumping on Remus and being warned off by a growl. But he would, of course, apologize later.

“Remus and Peter looked at one another. It seemed to them that they’d suddenly reached a point… to get up and follow the other two, mocking Sirius’s girl crazy attitude or to sit there and finish their breakfast. Remus gave Peter a quick smile and grabbed both their book bags. “Can’t exactly let those two lunatics loose on their own, can we?” he said and handed Peter his bag.” And here’s the moment – just that easily, the Marauders are born. Yay!

ROFL at the room with the ducks. Is that the Room of Requirement? Not exactly what they need at the moment, but VERY funny!

“Sirius stepped forward and the other two stepped back, knowing that when it came to charming disgruntled adults, the job was best left to Sirius. The same way the other two had known to step back and follow Peter, who had an uncanny sense of direction.” Everyone has a strength. I just love it.

“I mean we all know we wouldn’t if it was important, but nothing important has ever come up before… so maybe we don’t know. Does that make any sense?” Surprisingly good insight from James. Great!

I like how you’ve made Peter the sensible one. “I usually feel that when I don’t know from the start, it’s best not to know at all,” I’m interested to see how the Acromantula thing will affect him.

Remus’s revelation of friendship over the piles of notes is perfect. Very Remus-y.

Lily reminds me a little of Hermione…only not. If that makes any sense. I mean, she seems a little obsessive over things, but I really doubt Hermione would throw a book at anyone. More like 3rd-year Hermione than 1st. But different too. Arrgh, I'm not expressing this properly. I like your Lily.

*BAG* at Remus’s reaction to Little Women. I can just see him reading it, and being extremely confused. Especially at 11.

“Peter never ceased to surprise him. It was almost like he didn’t know when to lie and when to tell the truth and his mind often mixed up the signals.” Hmmm. That’s interesting. Good description!

“That’s what friends do.”
“Cover attackers in tentacles and make them dance the tarantella?”
“Exactly.” Woo-hoo! Wonderful Mauraders moment.

Great snowball fight…love the visit to the Astronomy tower to study! I’m glad they’re at least capable of all getting along.

In case you can’t tell yet, I really like this story! You have so many details, I just love the way you're characterizing all the first-year Gryffindors. Keep up the great work!

Reviewer: JulieDate: 2004-02-04
Reviewid: 69427Chapter: 7
(Just caught up on chapters 5-7)
Honestly, I love this story. You’ve given each of the Marauders a distinct personality; Remus and Lily describe everyone really well too! I have to thank you especially for developing Peter so well. Too many people try to leave him out.

I like the way the whole group of Gryffindor first-years can get along when they want to.

It’s interesting how you’ve given Remus parents that don’t much care for him. "Treating him as the family pet" indeed. And what’s up with Lily’s parents?

“…Peter fighting the urge to bash his skull against the wall the whole way.” ROFL! Their interactions are great!

I love the way they all pull together after the Acromantula attack. I’ll have to agree with James, though – WHAT was their professor thinking? He seems a little too much like Hagrid for the students’ good. That girls’ talk scene is priceless!

I think I’m glad to know Peter’s going to be OK. (I really like your Peter). It’s great that James and Sirius got to visit him! Interesting that the mediwizards are concerned about Muggle blood; I somehow hadn't pictured magical ability being that tied to the physical body. I’d think that after the transfusion, when Peter’s body is making his own blood again, he could recover. (But I know very little about blood, and less about how it carries magic *G*, so I could be way off.)

Are you planning to do the Marauders' entire time at Hogwarts? I'd be really interested to see how you develop these boys from where they are now to the scene we get in the Pensieve, and the Prank, and beyond. But I bet that's a LOT of work!

Thanks for this wonderful story! I'll be looking forward to seeing you on the update list.

Reviewer: fawkes101Date: 2004-01-26
Reviewid: 68476Chapter: 7
Wow! That's a brilliant chapter. I love how Sirius and James donate blood. Love the idea! Hope you update soon!

Reviewer: UnknownDate: 2004-01-19
Reviewid: 67721Chapter: 6
Great, very very well written! You should seriously continue. Overall great character use. Kind of a shame we don't get to see what eventually happens to Peter and Remus.

Reviewer: JellyDingyStar or Lady EowynDate: 2004-01-18
Reviewid: 67648Chapter: 2
Full moon?

Reviewer: stephanieDate: 2004-01-17
Reviewid: 67549Chapter: 1
note to 'lil moony'... you are very observant... i would never have noticed that care of magical creatures doesnt happen till third year.... now a note to author: its still a really good story and i cant wait to read more!!!...

Reviewer: stefDate: 2004-01-17
Reviewid: 67547Chapter: 6
this is actually quite a good story... you bring out the personas of each person through in a clear manor and im absolutely on titters waiting to see what happens to peter and remus... i do know in the end they'll be alright but its still worrying...please keep writing more soon... its quite good
:D

Reviewer: DonDate: 2004-01-03
Reviewid: 65624Chapter: 5
AAUUGGHHH!! A cliffhanger! I am rarely surprised by a cliffhanger. It is a testament to how well you write that I was caught completely unawares here! Your characterizations are amazing! Among the best I have seen. Especially since OotP! You have great backstories developing for so many characters. I am truly looking forward to seeing how they grow and interact. Favorite lines:
>>Sirius is terrified, and I do mean terrified, of cows. He even tries to avoid milk. <<
>>“Oh yeah? Head Boy, 1904?” Melissa quipped.

“Reginald Darkfeld,” Sirius and Rebecca answered at the same time, and then looked at each other, surprised.<<

I also like the crush Remus has for Melissa. It makes him seem sweeter.

Just fabulous work!!

Reviewer: shaziaDate: 2004-01-03
Reviewid: 65610Chapter: 5
is the story finished? anyway its a good story

Reviewer: COOLCATCUTEDate: 2004-01-02
Reviewid: 65576Chapter: 5
WRITE WRITE WRITE MORE MORE NOW!
I love the storys but it is not
finished so you must finish if you don't
i will hunt you down.
*****~kkrules~*****

Reviewer: NorthstarDate: 2003-12-30
Reviewid: 65233Chapter: 5
More, More, More!!!!

Reviewer: KizmetDate: 2003-12-30
Reviewid: 65196Chapter: 5
Now, see, I started reading this because you had lots of chapters and I thought it was done because I hate reading WIP. I get nasty when I don't get the whole story and I threaten the authors and then Filch comes along and he puts me in detention and I end up scrubbing trophies...

Great fic. Please hurry up and finish it before I have to clean a bathroom, too.

Reviewer: sdjklsajDate: 2003-12-30
Reviewid: 65188Chapter: 5
ACK!!!! Write mooooooooooreeeee!!!!!!!!! Pleeeease!!!!
I beg of you!!!!!

Reviewer: Lil' MoonyDate: 2003-12-30
Reviewid: 65176Chapter: 5
Yay! Another chapter! I love how you kind of hinted on things and got things going that happened later on. But, Care of Magical Creatures shouldn't happen until third year, I believe. Good, though!

Reviewer: RebeccaDate: 2003-12-17
Reviewid: 63674Chapter: 4
very, very good. please write more! end of the first year, and the 2nd year, etc! you are talented!

Reviewer: Yumnah MohamiedDate: 2003-12-14
Reviewid: 63228Chapter: 4
I really liked this sory about the maurarders but i really can not wait for the next few chapters, so could you pleeeeeeeeeeeeease tell me as soon as you have written them.

Reviewer: Llewella d'ambreDate: 2003-12-14
Reviewid: 63207Chapter: 4
Wow! This was very, very good. All four chapters were very nicely done. The characterizations were spot-on matches... it was so nice to see Peter built up to be a real person, and to see the interaction between all the characters. Keep on updating, this is a great story!

Reviewer: Lil' MoonyDate: 2003-12-13
Reviewid: 63118Chapter: 4
Yay! I love maurauder stories!!!! :)

Reviewer: DonDate: 2003-12-12
Reviewid: 63069Chapter: 2
Great start! I read chapters one and two, and I wanted to leave a review before going on to the rest. I like the characterizations. It's good to see Peter with some skills and a real personality. It's a nice touch that they all depend on each other for different things.

And the story is good, too. I like the start of the need for a map. You've a nice touch for detail, too. Like this bit:
>>&#8220;What is this?&#8221; he asked almost indignantly. &#8220;I&#8217;m looking for a classroom and I find a room with a small pond and six ducks walking around. Why is there a room like this??&#8221; He made a disgruntled noise and slammed the door shut. <<
Great work!!

Reviewer: LGJadeDate: 2003-12-11
Reviewid: 62962Chapter: 4
I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO glad! I have finally found someone here who believes in writing LOOOOOOOOOOOOOng stories!!!

Reviewer: Margaret B.Date: 2003-12-11
Reviewid: 62958Chapter: 4
Wonderful job developing the characters- I particuarly like Remus- and thanks also for NOT making Peter a complete prat- most marauder fics make him into such a git- and he wasn't, until he went over to the dark side!!! Lily is really cool too!!!
Siriusly,
Margaret

Reviewer: DaisyDate: 2003-12-11
Reviewid: 62904Chapter: 4
I adore this story. Its completely canon. I have read some stuff about the Marauders that is very, very ooc.
I can't wait for the next chapters.

Reviewer: redfiendDate: 2003-11-18
Reviewid: 60514Chapter: 3
Write more. Please?

Reviewer: SarahDate: 2003-11-13
Reviewid: 59893Chapter: 3
Hurry up write another chapter!!!! You know you might ant to consider going all the way to their seventh year. I think it would really be funny to see what pranks you cook up!!

Reviewer: CassDate: 2003-11-11
Reviewid: 59755Chapter: 3
CUTENESS ALERT!!!!!!!!!!! That was HILARIOUS!!!!!!
Hurry up nd write more.

Reviewer: Fawkes101Date: 2003-11-11
Reviewid: 59716Chapter: 3
A new chapter! Yeah! This was a really interesting chapter. I liked how you made James take lots of notes.... it's a different side of him. Hope you update soon.

Reviewer: Kate LynnDate: 2003-11-11
Reviewid: 59651Chapter: 3
"That smell...it followed me..."

LOL. This was a great chapter. Really fun, and I love the bonding and dynamic among MWPP. Their characters are developing nicely and distinctly, and the pace is excellent. Great job, thanks again! 8-)


Kate Lynn

Reviewer: Delleve MiststoneDate: 2003-11-05
Reviewid: 59010Chapter: 2
The second chapter was even better than the first! I hope you keep writing this story until the end of the school year . . . and maybe beyond?

The Sugar Quill was created by Zsenya and Arabella. For questions, please send us an Owl!

-- Powered by SQ3 : Coded by David : Design by James --