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| Dumbledore's
Army |
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Review(s): 27
| Reviewer: Patricia Shea | Date: 2005-05-18 |
| Reviewid: 122318 | Chapter: 3 |
Beautifully written & fills in gaps seamlessly. I also loved
"All three boys were of proud, ancient blood, and none would permit himself to flinch or show the slightest trace of shame." Very nice. Clearly puts them all on a similar level. Also loved Dumbeldore's handling of the situation & the compassion when he said, "Mr. Lupin is not a pawn in your rivalry." It was PERFECT! Thanks for sharing this story! |
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| Reviewer: Snuffles | Date: 2005-02-23 |
| Reviewid: 114776 | Chapter: 3 |
| Yeah, I agree, what about Remus? Isn't he supposed to be really mad a Sirius or something? |
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| Reviewer: louisa | Date: 2005-02-20 |
| Reviewid: 114443 | Chapter: 3 |
| A well told version of events. I liked the focus on the 3 ancient families and their pride, and you can see the adult Snape and Sirius in the boys behaviour. |
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| Reviewer: Hypatia | Date: 2004-06-23 |
| Reviewid: 88482 | Chapter: 3 |
| Wow, I'm highly impressed! I don't think I've ever read your stuff before. I love your descriptions, Ms. Ritani, your diolouge is very good but the stuff between is even better. You should write some R/H. ^_^ |
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| Reviewer: birdsong | Date: 2004-06-03 |
| Reviewid: 85768 | Chapter: 3 |
| Great story as to what happened that night! Now I'll go to your continuation of the story. Keep up the good work! |
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| Reviewer: Kizmet | Date: 2004-02-20 |
| Reviewid: 71574 | Chapter: 3 |
You will be telling us what Remus thought, won't you?
Please?
Kizmet, who is all to involved in this story than is good for her |
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| Reviewer: Coquillage | Date: 2004-02-19 |
| Reviewid: 71423 | Chapter: 3 |
Wait, do you mean that's the end?
<composes self.>
I mean, a lovely last line. But I would like to read more of your Marauders.
I do think Dumbledore let them off a little easy. It is his way to point out to them how stupid they've been, and let them beat themselves up about it, but I might have expected a little more anger radiating from him, and a bit more of a pointed commentary. I love your line about malice - very forboding. And three black haired boys, that really stood out. Thanks for a good read. |
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| Reviewer: Helen | Date: 2004-02-17 |
| Reviewid: 71158 | Chapter: 2 |
This is very accomplished - you've definitely succeeded in writing in JKR's "voice" and the character's you develop, their dialogue, the subtle details which describe their relationships to each other are very consistent with canon. I spesh liked James's broomstick flight to the Whomping Willow. I don't normally respond to sites, or often read potterverse fan-fic, but I figured you deserved some glowingly positive comments from me as I was genuinely impressed.
Good luck with future writing ventures! |
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| Reviewer: Julie | Date: 2004-02-17 |
| Reviewid: 71077 | Chapter: 2 |
Very plausible. That they would each take their own revenge...that Sirius would expect Snape to be able to defend himself, not knowing that James took his wand...this explains a lot. In fact, I think I'm going to adopt this explanation unless canon someday contradicts it. Great job!
I'm looking forward to seeing Dumbledore's reaction. Will you show Remus's reaction too? |
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| Reviewer: Coquillage | Date: 2004-02-16 |
| Reviewid: 70902 | Chapter: 2 |
| Disappoint? I hardly think so! That was wonderfully written action, which is not easy to do. Again, your writing is descriptive, your depiction of the Marauders and their interaction with Snape very realistic. Great word choices, and at the same time an excellent economy of words. I really like your writing style! |
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| Reviewer: SweetSirius | Date: 2004-02-14 |
| Reviewid: 70668 | Chapter: 1 |
Seriana,
I really enjoyed reading this, since I'm dying to know how it all came about. Your piece is really well written, and I love how you add little pieces to their characters bit by bit, like Remus being good at fixing things. I adored Sirius' attempts to cheer up James by suggesting possible girlfriends ("He can't date them all at once." "He can try." "Boy, would I." - oh, hee!), and I also really liked how you had James react to Remus' condition - he's conceited, yes, but he is able to put this away instantly to help Remus. Remus, too, is lovely, and his outburst at the end of this chapter was beautifully realised.
It's just a lovely take on this story, and I am looking forward to the climax. Well done!
All the best
~SweetSirius~ |
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| Reviewer: Mcily Nochi | Date: 2004-02-12 |
| Reviewid: 70363 | Chapter: 1 |
| Hooray, Seri, it's up! I love the sense of tight-knit friendship that you convey among these friends. They have their petty fights, their petty revenges, but when push comes to shove, they know when one of their own is threatened and they'll protect him at all costs. I really feel for Remus, too. He's too weak to fight back for himself, or to stop his friends from doing it for him. And he's the one among them who would want to keep the whole thing from happening. |
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| Reviewer: Kizmet | Date: 2004-02-12 |
| Reviewid: 70360 | Chapter: 1 |
Dogbreath?
ROFLMHO!!!!
Great fic, wonderful start, don't you dare not finish it!
Remus, in particular, is very very well done. You're conveying his exhaustion and his fears so powerfully.
Kizmet |
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| Reviewer: Coquillage | Date: 2004-02-12 |
| Reviewid: 70235 | Chapter: 1 |
What a great read! I'm trying to sort the many reasons that make this fic so enjoyable.
I could immediately visulize everything and I love that in a fic. Your interplay between the Marauders is on-target - not overdone, just right. "Try it and die, Dogbreath" indeed. The unsettling note of worry about the outside world is nicely inserted. And let's face it, we love these guys. Excellent portrayals, I'm eager to read more. Nice work. |
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| Reviewer: miss_lily_lupin | Date: 2004-02-12 |
| Reviewid: 70228 | Chapter: 1 |
| Very well written. I love the way you portray Peter. I hardly ever see a well written older non-Death Eater Peter, but you've done is SO well! And your portrayel on Remus is very good to. I've always had a fascination with him, so I always love it when someone writes him well. Great job! You've got to continue! |
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| Reviewer: Three Sickles Short | Date: 2004-02-12 |
| Reviewid: 70207 | Chapter: 1 |
INNNNNteresting. I'm getting the feeling that you're going to have James in on the idea from the start, yes? Prior to Book V, I might have had issues with that, but now I'd say it's an open question, and I'm very keen to see how you answer it. A gripping start!
TSS |
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| Reviewer: Antonia East | Date: 2004-02-11 |
| Reviewid: 70202 | Chapter: 1 |
| Brilliant, ansolutely bloody brilliant. The tone was spot on, and the way the four of them interact was perfect- as well as extremely funny. Try it and die, Dogbreath was a fantastic line. I hope you post the next bit soon- I love this |
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| Reviewer: Rainydaie | Date: 2004-02-11 |
| Reviewid: 70200 | Chapter: 1 |
| Great so far! Good description of the Marauders: Snape's just evil enough. And poor Remus... next chapter!!! |
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