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Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Moon and Stone
Review(s): 78

Reviewer: Readre2Date: 2005-06-22
Reviewid: 124882Chapter: 13
Quite Excellent

Reviewer: remus-sirius-harryDate: 2005-05-15
Reviewid: 122138Chapter: 1
i was crying when i finished it and i've read it again about 20 times since i first read it and i cry every time i read but i kept forgetting to review the thing that got me to review was half way through the the epilouge the cd player on my comuter stopped playing and you know how you can get it to disply colors on the screen next to the song list i glanced at it and it was silver and green i started crying harder. my favorite part was the epilouge because it made it sadder but so wonderful. aslo i don't have a screenname on sugar quill but on other sites my screenname is remus-sirius-harry or sirius-remus-harry.

Reviewer: Lady NaginiDate: 2005-04-02
Reviewid: 118520Chapter: 13
This is, quite honestly, possibly the only HP fanfic that's ever made me cry. Your character development was so wonderful that I started to actually have real emotions to the characters. The corruption of good, the loss of a certain innocence...it's truly tragic, and you made your readers *feel* it. It's easy to see how the gentle Sharessa could have turned on the school with a little guidance, and in light of this story, CoS becomes even more heartbreaking. It would become the final destruction of a legacy that should have been so much more (and I can't help but think that the Malfoys are just the sort of family whom Salazar would have detested).

I like this Salazar tons better than the usual evil, perverted, self-serving Slytherin most Founder stories portray him as. Anyone who started a school with Gryffindor and Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff couldn't have been that terrible.

Reviewer: MoonrunnerDate: 2004-12-21
Reviewid: 108249Chapter: 13
WAH!!! I"m crying now. That's just so sad, but sweet in a depressing sort of way. I have few questions though: How did the Chamber end up in the pumbing? Of a girls' bathroom, none the less? How did the sorting hat get the idea of anti-muggle opinions for Slytherin? Would it be possible (I'm going off on a limb right now) to, since the Founders put their mind into the hat, to talk to the Founders, almost like with magical portrats? Anyway, great story.

Reviewer: amandaDate: 2004-11-25
Reviewid: 105960Chapter: 13
That was really amazing. I like the idea of the true story being twisted over time and it made me cry to that he's thought to be such an awful person (at least to non-Slytherins) in the HP universe.

Reviewer: cherryDate: 2004-10-20
Reviewid: 101963Chapter: 1
cool...

Reviewer: JessDate: 2004-10-08
Reviewid: 100790Chapter: 13
I loved this story!!! The last chapter made me cry, they parted in such anger! Really well written, i congratulate you both! This is the first 'fan fiction' i've read, and you've exceeded all my expectations!! Thank you so much, you've provided me with something to read until the next book comes out! Well done on such an excellent story.
P.S- you have made it difficult for me to read CoS again... how can i read that last scene in the chamber when Harry kills the Basilsik when i know shes good!! =) and now i will also have problems hating the slytherins... well, maybe not!!

Reviewer: EmberDate: 2004-09-17
Reviewid: 98467Chapter: 13
It seems incredibly appropriate that the song plaing on my playlist when I finished this story was "Hands"... only kindness matters, in the end.

Reviewer: Kate LynnDate: 2004-06-12
Reviewid: 86893Chapter: 13
Hey guys, sorry it took me this long to review. Wonderful story. It's probably the best Founders fic I've read. The characterizations felt real, and the entire thing was imaginative and engaging. Course I didn't expect it to turn out any other way. A truly enjoyable read, thanks so much for sharing it. :)

Kate

Reviewer: AdiDate: 2004-06-08
Reviewid: 86467Chapter: 13
Yay! I'm back! Did you miss me?

Wow! That was really a fantastic story. *sob* Salazar died! NOOOOOOOOOOO!

I loved Sharessa, and William was adorable. I also liked how you tied in Hogsmede and how Sharessa lived behind the statue.

Oh, it's so sad how the last contact Salazar had with any of his friends was so... angry.

Erm... yes... this review is rather fragmented, as I'm trying to review quite a few chapters at once. I think I'll just leave it at "I loved it."

Keep writing, both of you!

TTFN
Adi

Reviewer: BarbDate: 2004-06-08
Reviewid: 86466Chapter: 13
Oh! It's over! :'( But that is such a nice ending! So they didn't get into a huge fight after all! Ohhhh so sad though. You guys did an amazing job! An by the way, I did read "before the begining" , which is partly why I wanted yu guys to include something about the ceilings... but hey, can't have everything you want! But seriously, this was really good. I like how you included Hogsmead too! Nice job guys! Hope you write some more together!

Barb

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-06-08
Reviewid: 86436Chapter: 13
Fantastic ending, I adore the Hat and how the sword stayed there, and the facts that turned into legend are fantastic.

Reviewer: EmilyDate: 2004-06-08
Reviewid: 86421Chapter: 13
WoW! That was awesome!!! I can't believe it's finally finished. I just want to say how great a read this has been. You really did a fantastic job with staying on-canon and making everything you created yourself so believable and true to the nature of how we'd imagine the Founders of Hogwarts to be like.

Reviewer: JulieDate: 2004-06-08
Reviewid: 86411Chapter: 13
Wow. This is...amazing. Poor Godric; poor Helga. I never suspected *that* would happen as Salazar's body wore out.

You did a wonderful job with the Epilogue, too! Seeing how the story changed in the telling...

I think I'm babbling. Thanks for this wonderful story. Do you plan to write any more?

Reviewer: beckDate: 2004-06-08
Reviewid: 86389Chapter: 13
what a good story

Reviewer: ByrdDate: 2004-06-08
Reviewid: 86350Chapter: 12
Opps... ignore my second question, I hadn't realized you'd already answered it in your authors' notes...

Reviewer: ByrdDate: 2004-06-08
Reviewid: 86348Chapter: 13
I'm sad to see this wonderful story end, but we all knew it had to end sometime. Poor Godric, his last memory of Salazar had to be of the fight. I do like your version of the fight though, that they didn't really have a huge fight where Salazar ended up leaving. I do have a couple questions though.
How did the chamber become linked to the bathroom? and...
What happened with all the werewolves they were housing?

Reviewer: billeeDate: 2004-06-06
Reviewid: 86039Chapter: 1
this storeeeeeee iz bullshit

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-06-03
Reviewid: 85771Chapter: 11
I am so happy that Meghan is back! She is so wonderful and I'm happy she and Sally(heehehehehe...I'm still waiting fomr him to be called that by Godric.) are understanding each other much better.

I just adore how you put together the hat. Of all the Founders stories, I think this hat tale is the most accurate. I like the Pensive-idea, so now we have our own concepts of where that came from! Keep writing. This is wonderful.

I'm still looking for what is going on to those werewolves, though...

Reviewer: BarbDate: 2004-06-03
Reviewid: 85750Chapter: 11
YEY!!!!! I really like this part! Oh and you guys should have added how they made the ceiling too! That would have been nice, but hey, youčre already done writing I guess so too bad! I wish we could see more of the other werewolves, like Salazar actually going to see them or something. And the pensieve potion making the sorting hat! Simply brilliant! You guys are so funny and good! Again, waiting impatiantly for the next part! ;)

Reviewer: the silent speakerDate: 2004-06-02
Reviewid: 85682Chapter: 11
This chapter read like Salazar did all the accomplishing and all the hard working-out for the Sorting Hat and Godric just ended up with all the credit. I'm not sure I like that idea. It would be one thing for the Hat to be a joint effort -- that would be just fine -- but you really put too much of the things that needed doing into Salazar's mind to the exclusion of the others. The Hat does say "'Twas Gryffindor who found the way" after all, and it was there so it should know... :)

Reviewer: HaggarDate: 2004-06-02
Reviewid: 85644Chapter: 1
This setting is great! I like the characters as well.

Reviewer: The CorinthianDate: 2004-06-02
Reviewid: 85603Chapter: 11
Only one chapter and the epilogue left to go! Damn. This is coming together nicely. The hat and the memories were nice additions. And I really enjoyed seeing all four of the founders working together. There hasn't been much of that in this, and I think that their cooperation is forgotten in most of the founder stories. Extra points to you guys. How long did Salazar stay at the school before he left? And what's your timeline (i.e. how long has Salazar been at the school)?

Reviewer: witch@heartDate: 2004-05-26
Reviewid: 84651Chapter: 10
Sorry that I haven't been reviewing; I've been insanely busy lately. Exams... Bleah.

Anyway, I really liked this chapter. The fight was an interesting change of pace, and very believable. I could see how the the evil was affecting all of them, especially Salazar. *sniff* They can't split!

The battle scene was great. I love the way they draw strength and joy from one another to "face the perils which beset them." (Not entirely sure where I'm quoting from there, but it sounds loffly) They really do make a great team. The methods of dementor extermination you explore are very interesting, and I especially liked Rowena's explanation for why she thought cold would work. It sounded very scholarly and Rowena-ish.

Salazar's transformation was deliciously dramatic. It happened quite a bit more gradually than Prof. Lupin's in PoA (9 DAYS!!...sorry); do you have a specific explanation for that? His mad dash for the Chamber was great, as was his snap at Godric.

I cringed when Godric found him after moonset. Is he all bloody, or just horribly drained? Sharessa must've been scared, watching this happen. I can't wait to find out why it was so much worse this time. Everyone's reactions to the way Salazar's health is slowly declining are great, especially Helga.

His thoughts on the new werewolves are great foreshadowing. I love the way we're really starting to see his train of thought against people like werewolves. When you look at things through his experiences and logical fears, it makes sense. I'm intrigued by this neighbor guy; it'll be very interesting to learn more about him. I also await further exploration of the new werewolves.

The discussion between Salazar and Godric sowed interesting seeds for future dissent. This is going to be one of those tragically ironic conflicts, where one party does something so as not to hurt the other and ends up inadvertently hurting them far worse. I love the way Godric jokes around constantly, because that provides nice contrast with Salazar.

All in all, great job! I'm back on track now, so I should be reviewing more often. Thanks!

Reviewer: AutumnDate: 2004-05-26
Reviewid: 84628Chapter: 1
Loved it!

Reviewer: BarbDate: 2004-05-26
Reviewid: 84585Chapter: 10
Well, as were the last chapters this one is also really good! I really like the fact that you've brought dementors in! And it's one of the first Dark wizards that appear! I like that! I'm really eager to find out what they're going to do with those werewolves! And I just figured something out... ehhh, shouldn't basilisk be able to live only 500 years? In which case Sharessa should be the mother of Voldemort's basilisk which would explain why they have such different temperaments... but I'm not sure about that... I'll have to check in CoS to make sure... Anyway, I'm looking forward to the next one and good job girls!

barb

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-05-26
Reviewid: 84560Chapter: 10
I've been enjoying this every step of the way. The battle scene was terrific, had my eyes peeled on the screen. Hehe. The idea of an angry neighbor is very spiffy and I'm quite curious to see what will happen to all the new werewolves. Keep writing! This is turning out wonderfully.

Aerin

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-05-26
Reviewid: 84555Chapter: 8
Hee. Sharessa is delightful. So cute and cuddly--for a snake, that is. Hehe. So sad I haven't been catching up, but I'll do that now! :)

Reviewer: BarbDate: 2004-05-10
Reviewid: 81967Chapter: 9
Hey! I'm hooked now! And there's no more to read... and that makes me sad. ;P You guys write really well! I'm gonna be looking for your other stories before you post more chapters... This is why I don't like reading stories that are not posted fully! I have to wait until the next chapters are posted and then I can't sleep at night cuz I'm wondering what is going to happen!!! Well I must say I really like the way you put Salazar... I didn't like him much in the books and your story provides a very nice view of him! And the Basilisk idea was pretty good! Sad Tom screwed her up that much! I'd like to have more of the spells Rowena and Godric do... that could be quite funny! And how they injure themselves! But otherwise you guys are really good! Keep up the good work!

Reviewer: The CorinthianDate: 2004-05-09
Reviewid: 81884Chapter: 9
Back to your work after a short absence. It's coming along very nicely - in canon and everything. Lovely conversation between Godric and Helga, by the way. The balance is shifting slightly towards even. And the basilisk is great. I take it this is the same basilisk that turn up in CoS? Well, a confinement of 400 years would make anyone, even a mythical creature, slightly crazy. I'm partial to the students; I'd like to see more of them. And why doesn't Sharessa hiss like Salazar?

Reviewer: beckDate: 2004-05-06
Reviewid: 81433Chapter: 8
love the story so far and i like how you have the basilisk come around cant wait for the next chapter

Reviewer: JulieDate: 2004-04-30
Reviewid: 80718Chapter: 8
Wow! I just discovered your story and read 8 chapters in one sitting. I like it a lot. I don't often read Founders fics; I'm not sure why, really. But I looked at this one because I like Andrea's Sorting Hat, and I'm really glad I did!

You've got a unique plot here (I know, how do I know that if I don't read Founders fics? But I have read *some*, and I'm pretty sure there's nothing else like *this* out there)! I like the idea of Salazar's motives being distorted by time; I'm looking forward to your revelation of why he left Hogwarts (if he does).

You've characterized the Founders well; they seem very real to me. The idea of Salazar as a werewolf is *wonderful*. I wish there was some way Remus could know about it. I like his relationship with Helga, too.

Sharessa the basilisk, huh? I feel sorry now for the way Tom used her. Too bad Harry couldn't do something about that, other than killing her.

I like the way you're treating Parselmouths too!

I'll definitely be watching for more of this story!

Reviewer: GDDate: 2004-04-29
Reviewid: 80650Chapter: 8
OOOH the baby basilisk is so sweet - hard to imagine how she grows up to petrify and kill (Tom must have done some major brainwashing).

Reviewer: chibi_squirtDate: 2004-04-28
Reviewid: 80479Chapter: 7
Have I mentioned I love you two? Another brilliant chapter, with happy Salazar / Helga affection! *squees in happiness*

Now, down to the serious review.

In general, the dialogue was better. There's was just the one part where I really had a hard time figuring out what they were talking about, and that was in where Godric was talking to Salazar about muggle vs. magical families, and Meghan being scared.

Other than that... you're moving the plot along quickly, but perhaps too quickly. I've noticed that in a lot of fanfiction, yours included, not enough time is spent on description of surroundings and characters. In the good fanfiction, the dialogue gives enough character that you don't need so much--in fact, JKR does that for her own characters; it took four books to find out James' eye color--but the setting is both necessary and easy to skimp. I think that's mostly because when we're reading, we're coming at it from a position of ignorance, but when we're writing, we're coming at it from a position of seeing the scene in our heads. (Or maybe that's just me. I could just be weird.) Anyway, a passage that seems to be purely dull description to a writer can just slip by for a reader. I'd say 99% of fanfiction is under-imaged; try overloading it, and if there's too much, people'll tell you.

My goodness, that was wordy, wasn't it? Ah well. You know you can ignore me if you want. ^_^

~Chibi_Squirt, the insane one with the pencil.

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-04-24
Reviewid: 80019Chapter: 7
Hehehe. I love how the legend of the Chamber of Secrets is finally taking place with the basilisk and all. This is all fitting together nicely...

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-04-24
Reviewid: 80016Chapter: 6
Meghan is a smart girl. I love the developments in this chapter...Are you planning to go into the disagreements with the founders or keeping it in the earlier times with them all happy with each other?

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-04-24
Reviewid: 80009Chapter: 5
This chapter was incredibly delightful and fun to read--the beginning of Hogwarts is coming soon! And yes, I did enjoy the double marriage conversation. Hee.

Reviewer: AdiDate: 2004-04-24
Reviewid: 79967Chapter: 7
Right, so I can't leave a really long review like usual, since I'm really busy. I just wanted to say I liked it, though.

And I really did! I'm so glad we're /finally/ seeing where the Basilisk came in. That's a much better reason than ridding the school of muggleborns... Oh, I /hope/ Salazar doesn't go all psycho-muggle-hater on us. I'm starting to think he won't, though. After all, he likes Sarah too much. *grin*

Anyway, great chapter, and I'm looking forward to the next one.

TTFN!
Adi

Reviewer: The CorinthianDate: 2004-04-23
Reviewid: 79867Chapter: 7
This is great - an excellent look at the founders. I think its getting a little bit repetative in places - you only have to have the same argument once. And I'd like to see a bit more of the other characters. This is a very, very good characterization of Salazar, but the other three come off as a bit flat, especially when put next to Salazar. Other than that, this is amazing. Keep going!

Reviewer: chibi_squirtDate: 2004-04-14
Reviewid: 78640Chapter: 6
Have I mentioned I *like* Meghan? A lot? She's awesome! She has the quiet sort of bravery that I *love* reading about. The sort of courage which pulls you through when you're worried about a friend, or afraid that someone's hurting themself. *And* she's enthusiastic. She actually reminds me quite a bit of me... I may not be able to handle flashy stuff like Harry can, but I can love a friend even when they're doing something that makes me really uncomfortable. ^_^

Anyway, I love the chapter. I liked the way you handled the classroom scenes. Just the right amount of teaching covered. And the confrontation between Salazar and Meghan was masterful, although all that hisssssing made me want to hurl a rock at his head, right through the computer screne.

You know, I've had a theory-thought. Harry doesn't hiss at all, but Voldemort has a noticable hiss when he's revived, doesn't he? *can't remember, and the book isn't at hand* But I remember in CoS he didn't have a hiss--that is, not as Tom Riddle. Perhaps the more time you spend *using* Parsletongue, the more you hiss in human speech? Because as werewolf, Salazar surely wouldn't be spending much time with humans.

Anyway, great chapter, and I look forward to more. ^_^

~Chibi_Squirt, the insane one with the pencil.

Reviewer: witch@heartDate: 2004-04-12
Reviewid: 78253Chapter: 6
More fluff! ^_^ Both of my sneakers are now missing, and I am blaming you. Anyway, I loved (surprise, surprise)the fluff between Helga and Salazar at the end. She really is good for him, and he is extraordinarily sweet to him in return. Great relationship.

I missed Godric and Rowena in this chapter, but I liked Sarah and Meghan. I suppose you meant Hippocrates, talking about the Parselmouth Greek Healer? Mythology is delectable, isn't it? Meghan is a very interesting character. I like watching her sweet, enthusiastic, sunny little self overcome her predjucdices. I can't wait to see how you are going to deal with the whole parents thing.

The thing about werewolves not usually living to be old is worrisome, (for our beloved Lupin as well as for... I bet he'd hate it if I called him Saly, wouldn't he?)and I will be interested to see if it will have any bearing on the plot. Eleven+ years of lonely, healingless wandering? That's harsh. Poor...Saly. ;) Also, *snickersnort* I loved the bit about men having "moon-times." At least WE have an EXCUSE for being cranky a few days a month!

Anyway, great chapter and I can't wait for more. Thanks, and Happy Easter! (or Passover, or whatever you celebrate! :) )

Reviewer: AdiDate: 2004-04-11
Reviewid: 78161Chapter: 6
"No apologizing either."
"Yesss, well...."
"No apologizing without actually apologizing,"

Haha! I loved that!
Great chapter, as always. I was wondering if she would make the connection. I'm glad she's not so scared anymore, and I hope she'll realize that not all the things she's been taught about werewolves are true (or that /most/ things aren't true, come to that...)

Just how old are the Founders in this, anyway? I got the impression they were maybe in their thirties-fourties, but I've been known to be terrible at guessing ages. It seems Salazar is a bit older than the rest of them.

Anyway, thanks for the chapter. Looking forward to the next one!

TTFN!
Adi

Reviewer: big daveDate: 2004-04-11
Reviewid: 78147Chapter: 6
another great chapter guys well done just a question for Andrea13 does this have the same contiuity as your "thinking cap" fics ie is the Salazaar in the sorting hat the same Salazaar from this fic?

and another thing are you planning on doing any more "thinking cap" fics later on *koff* maruaders *koff*

Reviewer: chibi_squirtDate: 2004-04-10
Reviewid: 78029Chapter: 5
So that's where you went off to!

I finally found this. And I love it. I'm not as obsessive an HP fan as I used to be, but still, I had a hard time tearing myself away from this. Although I still miss your other ofunders (are we ever going to get to meet them, or were you just stringing us along...?) I find this set absolutely delightful.

Now, comments on the story....

I'm reviewing all five chapters at once here, so it's not going to be in too much depth... But to start: PK, your characters in general tend to respond to what eachother is saying in the order in which it was said. That is, Person 1 will say A then B, and Person 2 will respond to A then B. This is extremely confusing, because every time it happens, I have to go back and reread the previous paragraph to find out what you meant. (Andrea, you might do this too, but I haven't noticed it as much with your stuff.)

On the other hand, I *love* the premise. And the characterization of three out of four founders. Salazar is too hesitant for my taste, but it's still fairly well-done. I just don't like the effect you're doing a fairly good job of achieving. Does that make any sense? Ah, well, email me if it doesn't.

I'm a little disappointed that everyone is teaching... well, what they're *still* teaching in Harry's time. I was expecting a little more differentiation than that, especially from two H: AH forum-goers like you.

If it were me, I woud drag out the romance between Salazar and Helga a bit more. Not too much, but I felt like we went from "I'm *married*, Godric!" to "It's not a bad idea" fast enough for a bit of whiplash. On the other hand, I *loved* the kissing scene. This is because I am, at heart, a hopeless romantic. ^_^

Oh, and last but not... okay, it probably is least: that bit about the muggle-born parslemouth that Salazar was too quick to pass over? Justice. Pure justice. *evil grin*

Reviewer: wendelin_the_weirdDate: 2004-04-05
Reviewid: 77299Chapter: 5
You're doing such an awesome job with this fic! To be honest, I thought making Salazar a werewolf would end up being, you know, just a weird thing for the sake of being weird and original... but these charaters are real. You've been told a lot that your characterisations are awesome.. believe it! :) I loved helga bouncing, dunno why. BTW, are there going to be flying lessons? Who's going to give them?

Do you mind very much if I make a wishlist of the stuff I'd like to see explored? I want to know about Gwen a little. I'd love to see Godric and Rowena in their element when they're teaching - I don't know why but they just strike me as being the excellent-teacher type (Resmus-y). Actually, strike that... I just want to see all of them teaching. I'd love to get to know some of the students, and maybe see how the Founders deal with their first difficult parents.

Oh well. I guess I only want more of this story. Did you say it was *mostly* done?? :(

Reviewer: SonicDate: 2004-04-05
Reviewid: 77270Chapter: 5
Great chapter. :) Aw, I wished you would detail the making of Hogwarts though.

Be waiting.

Reviewer: ElshaDate: 2004-04-04
Reviewid: 77177Chapter: 5
I really enjoy this story, to the point that I'm dreading what I know will happen - the breaking of the Founders' friendship and Salazar leaving Hogwarts. People tend to dismiss Salazar all too easily as someone who was just a really nasty person, at heart. That's like the people who write Marauders fics where Peter has flashing signs saying "traitor" and barely spends any time with the other three. In both those cases, the huge tragedy was that they were such good friends, and no one would have dreamed it _could_ end that badly. Salazar is generally vilified, and I adore your Salazar. You can see the defensiveness, stubborness and fear that will eventually drive him away; but he's not evil, or horribly prejudiced. After all, the bloke must have taught Muggleborn students for years! He can't have hated them that much.

I also just enjoy the humour of this fic - there's some nice banter. Normally I'm not _so_ keen on fics with romance between the Founders (as it can be so easily misused) but it works here, especially with Godric and Rowena. They have as much friendship as romance, which is the most important thing. So, when it comes to it, do Helga and Salazar.

One question - do you envision Salazar as Moorish? I always have, because of the name, and I'm endlessly surprised at the number of times he shows up as Aryan-type. (I suppose that's 'cause of Malfoy, but I tend to see Helga or Godric with their Germanic/Saxon names as more likely to be blond. Then, though, that brings in the "dumb blonde" prejudice for Helga, which is clearly untrue.)

Reviewer: witch@heartDate: 2004-04-04
Reviewid: 77146Chapter: 5
This was a lot of fun to read. It explains a lot of stuff and enters some new and interesting conflicts. And it was... *insert Stitch voice* also cute and fluffy! ;) I LOOOOVE Salazar and Helga. They are so adorable! Really, I love the dynamics between all four of them. Godric and Rowena are hilarious; I love their senses of humor. The joking that goes on seems a lot more spontaneous and realistic than in most fics. The conflicts you are introducing are excellent food for thought; I liked hearing why Salazar is wary of Muggles. Also, seeing how different aspects of the school develope is great. And *sniffle* I can see the beginnings of the rift sprouting. I am going to sob at the schism! You have made me love these characters. Great job, and I can't wait for more. Thanks!

Reviewer: BirdheadDate: 2004-04-03
Reviewid: 77110Chapter: 5
:D That's really lovely- I'm already Meghan's greatest fan. And I like the Parselmouth too. Looking forward to seeing Salazar teaching, too!

Reviewer: AdiDate: 2004-04-03
Reviewid: 77085Chapter: 5
*squee* *is a sucker for romance...*
Yay! Hogwarts! *does the Hogwarts Dance* They've started Hogwarts! And Salazar gets to be the evil potions master! *grin* *can hardly wait*
Ooh! A parselmouth! And she's in Godric's House! *grin* /That'll/ teach Salazar to be more observant...
I like the way you deal with Salazar's prejudice against muggles and muggleborns. It's not very pronounced, and can't even really be called prejudice at this point. He seems to simply by /wary/ of them. Of course, that's got to change eventually, since he /did/ leave because of those prejudices. Or is that one of the parts of the legend that was simply exagerated?
Anyway, as you can probably tell, I really enjoyed this chapter. My only complaint is that you didn't really cover all of the preparations for the school. I was kind of looking forward to the arguments that were bound to break out before they decided on the House system, and I wanted to watch their first Sorting. Ah, well, I'm sure I'll get to see one with the founders eventually. *grin*
Can't wait for the next chapter! TTFN!

Your loyal reader,
Adi

Reviewer: KizmetDate: 2004-04-03
Reviewid: 77077Chapter: 5
Compliment indeed.

I do hope this isn't the end, for all my whining. I like your Founders and want more!

Kizmet

Reviewer: ImpIncDate: 2004-04-01
Reviewid: 76698Chapter: 4
*squeals* I love it!

And I didn't really think it was too repetitive. I think it sort of works.

And I must admit that I'm curious how one of Salazar's colors turned out to be silver. Hmmm.

Reviewer: GryffinMiraurDate: 2004-03-31
Reviewid: 76646Chapter: 4
I am so impressed with this fic. Your characterizations of the Founders are believable and I love what you've done with Salazar. You've made him sympathetic and in that sympathy, it is clearer why he may have left Hogwarts. I'm looking forward to the next chapters.

Reviewer: KizmetDate: 2004-03-30
Reviewid: 76379Chapter: 4
I think you're doing a great job... stringing me along.

I'm still here and wishing this was a finished fic instead of a work in progress.

Hurry up already.

Kizmet

Reviewer: SonicDate: 2004-03-29
Reviewid: 76188Chapter: 4
very good choice of the title. :)

Just a point though. Do you realize that all of them are amazingly, almost sickeningly nice? I just can't find any fault in them yet. I know it's still early, but I feel it will be more realistic if the characters become a more three-dimensional figure.

Aw, and I want more humour! And.. where's the antagonist? the problem? This is too goody-goody and happy for me. hehe
You see, I like angst, pain.. coupled with action. and.. ooh, Slytherin as a werewolf has endless possibilities!

Wow, you know, you are one of the few who actually respond to my comments. I'm touched. :) *tears*

Be waiting. :)

Reviewer: BjarkeDate: 2004-03-28
Reviewid: 76117Chapter: 1
Very well written story. I really liked it.

Reviewer: AdiDate: 2004-03-28
Reviewid: 76092Chapter: 4
*squees*
Helga and Salazar sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G! *laughs at her own joke* *realizes that's pathetic*
Anyway, great chapter, as always. *grin* So, next chapter they decide to create Hogwarts, right? Yay! Lots of questions will be answered! *celebrates*
I really love your characterization! Sheesh, Salazar apologizes a lot... I guess it's understandable, but seriously! *sigh*
"'If memory serves, you were snapping at Helga, not at me.'" My, Godric is tactless, isn't he? *grin*
When are Salazar's prejiduces going to come into light, and how did he get them, anyway? It doesn't have anything to do with his lycanthropy, right? Like the werewolf that bit him was a muggle and thus didn't lock himself up? </theorizing>
Anyway, great chapter! I can't wait for the next one!

TTFN!
Adi

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-03-28
Reviewid: 76050Chapter: 4
Twiddledee! Very cute chapter. Loved more of the Helga and Salazar-i-ness. I love how you stay in the past sense of dialogue yet still manage to capture the humor and sarcasm of dear ol' Salazar. So now we've got the these two together...what about Rowena and Godric? :P

Reviewer: SonicDate: 2004-03-21
Reviewid: 75373Chapter: 3
Silver in spells? woh.
And.. um.. may I say a bit of ... um.. "constructive" criticism???? I don't really deserve to, but Slytherin seems a bit too talkative. For a person who has gone through so much difficulty and for a person who has been alone for so long... I think he would keep some of the comments to himself. I dont know... it feels a bit overdone as he goes on and on about his great new friends.

The "wonderful" part with his sense of humour was great though.... really enjoyed that part. So, it's Helga/Salazar??? hehe :)

Reviewer: MeganDate: 2004-03-16
Reviewid: 74899Chapter: 3
I won't complain, like other reviewers, about the details, like "how could Salazar choose silver for his house" (you gave some clue in this episode), or "how do you reconcile your Salazar with the one obsessed with pureblood and ambition," which I'm sure you plan to explain at some point via an interesting turn of events.

I'm perfectly willing to accept your refreshing view on the past. After all, the four were friends in the beginning (according to the Sorting Hat)! So keep it up.

However, what I will complain about is something less tangible, that has to do with style. You have a lot of good things in your writing, and a very big, bad one: you are extremely repetitive. Try re-reading these 3 chapters with a critical eye, and see how many times Salazar is surprised at their kindness, how many times they dance around each other within the same conversation. It is annoying to ram your message down readers' throats. You could have cut each chapter in half and gotten the same ideas across. Plus, and I suspect related to this, your dialogue is at times confusing, b/c characters reply to something at the beginning of the other person's speech, rather than the end, and your verbosity has confused the reader by that point. Here's an example from this episode:

"Well, it's not as if we have guests," Rowena said in an amused tone that covered her uneasiness at his confusion. "I can't think it's the most comfortable room in the keep, though."

"Exccept for me. But I don't think I want to ssit at a table for a while, no matter how good Helga's sspellss are."

I honestly read it as Salazar saying that he's the only one feeling comfortable in the Great Hall, which didn't make any sense. It wasn't until I read a few more lines that I realized you were back to hammering the message that he's still unsure of his position in the household, still surprised, still confused a.s.o.

If my review makes you feel bad, I apologize. Honestly. I'd like you to know that I don't take the trouble to review this extensively unless I have strong feelings about a fanfic. And I feel that yours has great potential, if only your could cut down the repetitive verbosity.

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-03-16
Reviewid: 74855Chapter: 3
I love the humor. In the last chapter, Salazar doing cartwheels...cute! As the Helga/Salazar here is touching...although you need to write more on Gwen and Salazar's past! I am definitely hooked.

I'll be back.
Aerin :)

Reviewer: AerinDate: 2004-03-16
Reviewid: 74854Chapter: 2
I just love the founders. They're so incredible...they built Hogwarts and we know they were amazing friends..but there still is so much yet that we don't know. I love how you're taking this...and a lycanthropic Salazar is quite interesting. I'm very pleased to read on and find out what happens next.

Andrea13, I couldn't find your email, but thank you for reviewing Baby Nimbus 600. As for Peter, I was very sorry to leave him out. It really would have ruined, for me, the purpose of writing the story--just to play a little in the happy times before it all went wrong. It wasn't fair of me, and I apologized to Peter beforehand. I am going to include him in the rest of my stories, though. He's an interesting character to write. Although difficult.

Take care and keep writing, the both of you! This is fantastic work. :)

Reviewer: JessamyDate: 2004-03-14
Reviewid: 74572Chapter: 1
Wonderful and very original. I don't have anything to critisize, so just keep on writing. I'll be looking forward to the next chapter!

Reviewer: AdiDate: 2004-03-14
Reviewid: 74532Chapter: 3
*grin* Very nice, as usual. I wonder how they're going to deal with that next full moon...
Okay, a question. Is the house they live in now actually the castle that eventually becomes Hogwarts, or does a lot of revision of the place go on? I got kind of confused when they started talking about the infirmary and the Great Hall. Are these the same ones we see in canon, except much newer?
Hmmm... theory on the Chamber of Secrets. Salazar builds it, and puts a basilisk in it, for his transformations. Apparently, snakes calm him, thus the reason for the basilisk. Also, the place is big enough that he can run, a basilisk is big enough and strong enough that he can chase it instead of beating himself up, and it's well enough protected that he won't escape and hurt anyone. After all, you can only get out if you speak Parseltongue. *sigh* Well, I'll just have to wait and see, won't I? *grin*
Hmmm... is there maybe a kind of romance brewing between Helga and Salazar? I know Salazar's "married," but he isn't, really, because Gwen died. So he's actually a widower, and could marry again, if he wanted. Or is he lying about that or something?
*sigh* So many questions! I'm looking forward to reading the next chapter, and hopefully maybe getting an answer or two. *smile*

TTFN!
Adi

Reviewer: ChermainEDate: 2004-03-05
Reviewid: 73213Chapter: 1
WoW! Terrific! Can we hav more pretty pls?

Reviewer: RoseDate: 2004-03-04
Reviewid: 73137Chapter: 2
I am particularly intrigued by this story, and look forward to reading more!

Reviewer: Chocolate MuseDate: 2004-03-04
Reviewid: 73131Chapter: 2
This is such a creative idea! I mean, what's better than Salazar and werewolves, then werewolf!Salazar? I enjoyed the little comment about Salazar doing cartwheeles, it made me giggle madly.

Reviewer: GyakutennoDate: 2004-03-03
Reviewid: 72986Chapter: 1
Er... well, this Salazar seems too nice to have anything to do with the Dark Arts. He doesn't strike me as too ambitious(unless wanting a roof over your head, a warm bed, three meals a day, and a few friends is a lot to ask!), and not at all sneaky, and, going by the fact Umbridge is fond of referring to Lupin as a "half-breed" (grrr!), I don't think Werewolf!Salazar would care if you're a half-giant Muggle-born semi-Squib (think Neville)- and werewolves go without saying- so I don't get the pureblood thing. And Harry doessssn't talk like thisssss, but he'ssss a Parssselmouth. No offense, Werewolf!Salazar, for imitating you... couldn't resist! But this is such a good story, I really hope there's a logical explanation.

Reviewer: RainydaieDate: 2004-03-01
Reviewid: 72857Chapter: 2
It certianly didn't dissapoint. You talk about chapter five, above - how many chapters is this fic going to be? Very many, hopefully. The idea of silver is also intresting. Salazar does seem like the type to choose that. I also love the way you use Caduceus as a calmer for Salazar. And the first hints of a love/hate relationship between Godric and Salazar - good one.

Reviewer: KizmetDate: 2004-03-01
Reviewid: 72845Chapter: 2
I did it again. I started a WIP fic and now I have to wait for the ending.

Excellent work. Helga and Rowena are well-drawn and distinct characters. Godric's compassion and sensibility (and daring) are being nicely developed.

I really look forward to more chapters.

Kizmet

Reviewer: MysTeriDate: 2004-03-01
Reviewid: 72731Chapter: 1
You already know how much I like this. I really like the fact that you are portraying Salazar as a good person. Now it could be because I'm a bit fragile emotionally right now but you had me sniffling through lots of this with his reactions to people being kind. I also quite enjoy the teasing that goes on. I'm quite certain that the rest of the story will be just as wonderful.

P.S. Argh, now I have a Paul Harvey voice in my head telling the "Rest of the Story" about Salazar Slytherin. ;)

Reviewer: hiDate: 2004-03-01
Reviewid: 72727Chapter: 2
I really like this. Its very interesting. Keep it up.

Reviewer: SonicDate: 2004-02-29
Reviewid: 72650Chapter: 2
wow,.. very interesting.. the idea is definitely good enough for an epic story.. haha.. will be waiting...

Reviewer: AdiDate: 2004-02-29
Reviewid: 72623Chapter: 2
Excellent chapter. Oh, poor Salazar... I must say I felt a vague sort of dread when he said there was nothing for him to tear apart in the chamber, as I remember what Remus Lupin did when in that situation... Maybe blanket would be a good idea, if only because it will distract the wolf from tearing at itself.
One question. Werewolves definitely have to breathe, right? Were there any air holes in that place? Wouldn't air eventually run out?
*grin* I liked the argument. And the way it ended. I admire Helga and Rowena for their tactfulness. *I* certainly wouldn't have been...
Anyway, excellent chapter, and I'm looking forward to the next one.
TTFN!
Adi

Reviewer: SpookykatDate: 2004-02-29
Reviewid: 72568Chapter: 1
Greetings from the Fic Exchange.

I must say that I'm not usually a fan of founder-fic, mostly because the characterizations tend to be a reincarnation of Draco, Hermione, Cedric, and Harry. But you might've changed my mind.

Greetings from the fic-exchange.

I don't think I've ever seen werewolf!Salazar before. It seems odd that he's a werewolf and Hogwarts has never accommodated werewolves thereafter. However, it makes sense that Dumbledore would accommodate Remus if Hogwarts had a werewolf before.

I love the writing. It's very fast-paced and entertaining to read. The Helga/Godric/Roweena banter was great!

Can't wait for the next chapter!

~SK

Reviewer: AdiDate: 2004-02-22
Reviewid: 71882Chapter: 1
*grins* I really quite enjoy this idea. I've read your other stories and must say that I think you're very talented. I'm curious as to what Salazar's excuse to having a Chamber of Secrets is, though. And when Godric and Salazar are going to have their first argument. And when they're all going to get the idea to start Hogwarts. And why in the world Salazar would /want/ silver as one of his house colors. Ahh... well... I guess I'll just have to wait, won't I? *grin*

Keep writing! I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
TTFN
Adi

Reviewer: kitzamaeveDate: 2004-02-22
Reviewid: 71863Chapter: 1
Interesting story. I like it, but why would a werewolf choose silver and green (well the silver part anyway) for his house colours? just a thought

Reviewer: RainydaieDate: 2004-02-22
Reviewid: 71835Chapter: 1
That is an idea! Salazar, a werewolf. Brilliant. Shiningly so. I've always been fascinated by the founders - they do seem to have a remarkable resemblance to our "modern-day" main characters and their lives. You did this beautifully. I await chapter two eagerly.

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