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| Dumbledore's
Army |
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Review(s): 50
| Reviewer: amy | Date: 2005-09-29 |
| Reviewid: 133432 | Chapter: 1 |
| i think that your story was great but it would of been better if it was a bit more longer. |
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| Reviewer: ChildOfScorpio | Date: 2005-05-05 |
| Reviewid: 121466 | Chapter: 1 |
| That just about made my day, along with One Week - I loved the way you handled their awkwardness especially - and it was so original as well - I've never heard anything quite like this! |
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| Reviewer: Angharad | Date: 2004-09-22 |
| Reviewid: 99040 | Chapter: 1 |
| Wow *sighs* that was fantastic, it was so...poignant, and...beautiful. I loved it, you have a great writing style and I am so happy I happened upon this fic! |
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| Reviewer: Christina | Date: 2004-08-02 |
| Reviewid: 95347 | Chapter: 1 |
| wow, this story was great!! i loved all the emotion you put in for hermione! i expecially liked part 1 where hermione is the "volcano" and rons trying to excape it! that was pretty clever! keep writing!thanks! |
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| Reviewer: Genesse | Date: 2004-07-18 |
| Reviewid: 92950 | Chapter: 1 |
Wow, that was really beautiful. I've said it before, that I think you write in the present tense so fantastically that I don't think I'd be able to tolerate any other person's attempt at it. I would like to formally encourage you to write more
"I knew you'd like that one." Oh, Ronniekins! |
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| Reviewer: Genesse | Date: 2004-07-18 |
| Reviewid: 92949 | Chapter: 1 |
Wow, that was really beautiful. I've said it before, that I think you write in the first person so fantastically that I don't think I'd be able to tolerate any other person's attempt at it. I would like to formally encourage you to write more
"I knew you'd like that one." Oh, Ronniekins! |
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| Reviewer: Neil | Date: 2004-07-07 |
| Reviewid: 91153 | Chapter: 1 |
Your style intrigues me. I'm not sure that I would choose to write as a third person narrator for so intimate a subject. However, since it makes the players less personal, the situation becomes the whole focus of the story- an interesting effect. I'm looking forward the completion of 'One Week.'
Neil |
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| Reviewer: Seaspray | Date: 2004-07-06 |
| Reviewid: 90944 | Chapter: 1 |
| Aww.... lovely. Summer and winter. You capture everything beautifull and with a marvellous economy of words. It's so... tender and innocent and... Ron and Hermoine. Perfect. |
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| Reviewer: Heleen. | Date: 2004-07-05 |
| Reviewid: 90754 | Chapter: 1 |
| Honestly, I thought my heart would jump out of my chest while reading this story. Just...brilliant! I mean it, I nearly broke down in tears when Ron said "You". Really, hat's off! |
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| Reviewer: Pline | Date: 2004-07-03 |
| Reviewid: 90383 | Chapter: 1 |
| I know you probably made this story a while ago but I decided to review anyway. This story was so sweet. You ended it perfectly and the whole concept was great. ^_^ |
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| Reviewer: sweetie | Date: 2004-06-27 |
| Reviewid: 89129 | Chapter: 1 |
GREAT JOB! very touching! your writing is SO GOOD. i thrive on R/H fluff, and you did it so well! great job!
luv sweetie |
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| Reviewer: scoutwillow | Date: 2004-06-27 |
| Reviewid: 89104 | Chapter: 1 |
| i really liked it, I thought it was wonderfully writen and a great, it was jest great! p.s. I didn't steal your name, I came up with it long before i found this site, one question though, did you get it from "TO Kill A Mocking Bird"? well that's all, Can't wait to read your other stories!!! |
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| Reviewer: Maryann | Date: 2004-06-27 |
| Reviewid: 89077 | Chapter: 1 |
| Wow, that story just made my birthday! That was one of the few actually believable R/H fics that I've ever read, and it made me cry. Thank you! :-D |
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| Reviewer: Aimee | Date: 2004-06-27 |
| Reviewid: 89067 | Chapter: 1 |
| What a sweet story, I really enjoyed reading it! It's so simple that it's perfect R/H. :o) |
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| Reviewer: erika | Date: 2004-06-26 |
| Reviewid: 89014 | Chapter: 1 |
| aww...that was so cute. Short and Sweet..nicee =) Love the ideas about the snow coming from the moon. Interesting. Heh - Keep up with the great work =) |
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| Reviewer: Sam | Date: 2004-06-26 |
| Reviewid: 88983 | Chapter: 1 |
| I really, really like your description of summer and the exciting sense that something is just waiting to happen. I stopped and read over it again and again. I've felt that too. Those paragraphs were just great. |
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| Reviewer: miaka mouse | Date: 2004-06-26 |
| Reviewid: 88930 | Chapter: 1 |
| aghhh!! ur too good at this you know?? i keep pausing line after line, wanting to memorize the way you've expressed a certain image or sentiment... because it's so perfect and beautiful and wow... keep sharing your wonderful writing with us please!! |
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| Reviewer: ivy & Gracie | Date: 2004-06-25 |
| Reviewid: 88764 | Chapter: 1 |
This is a lovely, unusual piece. Although it's not the way we usually see Ron or Hermione it doesn't seem OOC because most of the "action" is going on inside their individual heads. When they do open their mouths, you make them say things that mostly sound Ron-like and Hermione-like.
The use of the present tense works well to give it a breathless, what's-going-to-happen-next flavor; just what Ron & Hermione are probably thinking. Your tenses flip-flopped back & forth a little in Part I though, and added a bit of a jarring note; you want to be careful to be consistent throughout.
You have such a fluid, poetic voice; we look forward to reading more from you! |
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| Reviewer: ShinaLaris | Date: 2004-06-25 |
| Reviewid: 88732 | Chapter: 1 |
That's beautiful. I just love the way you described the word love. But I think it'd be more effective if it were in the same POV throughout a part. Anyways, I love reading it!
~Shina Laris |
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| Reviewer: WeasleyJunkie | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88686 | Chapter: 1 |
| That was so simple and so beautiful. Thank you for writing it, and for bringing a smile to my face as well. |
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| Reviewer: Sharon | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88632 | Chapter: 1 |
This story makes me happy.
I love the way both characters have moments where they suddenly and unexpectedly want the other one to know something. Hermione wants Ron to know she's capable of more than just science, etc. Ron wants Hermione to know he thinks she's kind and lovely. Hermione wants Ron to know how she feels. I like how they don't really ponder these things too much... they're just gut feelings they have that surprise them. |
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| Reviewer: Sehila | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88626 | Chapter: 1 |
| Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. |
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| Reviewer: Frankie Beeblebrox | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88619 | Chapter: 1 |
| How utterly, completely beautiful. I love the flow of your stories, your amazing descriptions lovingly painting the picture before the reader. . . this is fabulous. The whole cycle of the story is just brilliant, and. . . I can't think of enough adjectives to do this justice. Beautiful, beautiful work. |
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| Reviewer: moo | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88594 | Chapter: 1 |
awww, that as pretty sweet. you kinda have the same writing style as me, except you can actually manage to keep the characters in, uh, character. that sounded really akward, which should give you an idea about my writing :)
anyway, i liked this a lot. keep writing! |
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| Reviewer: Azyne | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88545 | Chapter: 1 |
*wails*
YOU WRITE SO BEAUTIFULLY! (pardon the pun lol)
That was gorgeous. I just don't get how you could write so poetically. I admire you! |
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| Reviewer: Linnet | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88544 | Chapter: 1 |
Again, this is beautiful! Poetic language, and I like your style of using "she is dizzy" and "he is grinning" instead of "Hermione was dizzy" and "Ron was grinning"-it really enhances the tone of the story.
-PQ |
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| Reviewer: Ella | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88541 | Chapter: 1 |
Wow.... I, well, *loved* it. Heh. I love your writing style, it's wonderful to read R/Hr fluff that's written so well it becomes more than just fluff and something really important and wonderful.
~Ella |
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| Reviewer: Maggie | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88536 | Chapter: 1 |
| I have a deep and serious love for this story. Honestly. It's beautifully written, with a wonderful narrative voice from Hermione. It's wonderfully discriptive. I'd also like to say, I like your Ron a great deal, as he's both confused and scared. You show both characters vulnerability very well. WRITE MORE!! |
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| Reviewer: story645 | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88523 | Chapter: 1 |
| Aww, very sweet and fluffy. I love the volcano references. I thought that they were funny. I also liked Ron's general fear of getting burned by Hermione. I kind of thought that the encounter should have been more awkward, with Ron stumbling out the word you, but I guess it depends on how old they are at that point. |
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| Reviewer: Eliza M. | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88518 | Chapter: 1 |
"She is dizzy, and puts her forehead against his shoulder to rest, and he plays with her fingers, and in the end, the only description that really matters is this one.
And it’s beautiful."
Yeah it is *dabs eyes*. You've got a way with words,this story was brilliant, truly brilliant, |
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| Reviewer: Dina C. | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88517 | Chapter: 1 |
| I love your sense of Ron and Hermione. It's so benevolent. By that I mean: you get that they sometimes bicker, but it's not mean-spirited, and mostly, they are kind toward one another. Too many fanfics go overboard on the arguing and fighting, I think. Your light, playful touch is beautiful. And this particular story has a sweet poetry and simple spirit that I really enjoyed. Thanks, Scout! |
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| Reviewer: Chocolate Frog Card | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88513 | Chapter: 1 |
That was really great! It was different and I enjoyed it a lot. You kept them in character and your descriptions were good.
You made it sentimental without it being sappy. Good job! |
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| Reviewer: Rogue13 | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88511 | Chapter: 1 |
| Short Simple Sweet, three simple words to describe it all. Please continue to write more! |
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| Reviewer: Estie | Date: 2004-06-24 |
| Reviewid: 88498 | Chapter: 1 |
| Simply beautiful. I love how poetic everything is...it's so unlike J.K.'s most prose-like prose. Very refreshing. |
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