The Sugar Quill
Sugar Quill Community
- S.P.E.W (SQ History)

Fan Fiction and Writing
- Ask Madam Pince
(Story Submissions)
- Floo Network (Links)


Administrative Links

Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 58

Reviewer: birdsongDate: 2006-07-23
Reviewid: 144368Chapter: 8
Thank you for finishing your story! The ending has so much possibility! Good luck with you future writings! I'm looking forward to reading your first novel.

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-07-21
Reviewid: 144324Chapter: 8
I loved it – but it is no where near finished.
Good luck in your efforts to get published.
You know, it would be easy to divorce Eshu from Hogwarts.
Perhaps a lonelier journey?

Reviewer: shiikiDate: 2006-07-21
Reviewid: 144318Chapter: 8
Thank you for the lovely story, Tapestry. I'm sorry that it's ended, because I really would love to read more about Kit. But you've ended it on a good note, with the mystery of Eshu's daughter solved, and Serena finding something of a place. You've done a great job on this all the way!

Reviewer: tapestryDate: 2006-07-20
Reviewid: 144311Chapter: 1
Swell wrote:
"May I ask why you are so sure that this will be the last one, or rather that you will not be writing any more?"

Well, it's not for a lack of love for HP or my characters, I can tell you. There really is a lot more to Kit's story. Reams! But my free time is serverely limited these days - my daughter is a special needs child and her care takes most of my non-work hours. Combine that with too many interests and an ambition to write and publish original fiction and there just isn't time for fanfic anymore.

Kit, a different incarnation of her at least, will be starring in my first original novel. I've been puttering around with it for a while but I think it has promise and I hope one day you'll be able to read about Kit's adventures in her own world and outside the realm of Harry Potter. Now if I can just get past chapter 3, LOL.

Thank you for the lovely compliments and for reading Eshu - it really means a lot to me that there are people out there that enjoy the story so much and have loved Kit as much as I have.

Reviewer: swellDate: 2006-07-20
Reviewid: 144304Chapter: 8
Oh my. Ive been checking this every day. These stories have such possibilities. May I ask why you are so sure that this will be the last one, or rather that you will not be writing any more? Those of us who like these stories 'off the beaten track' will miss you.

Reviewer: AaragogDate: 2006-07-20
Reviewid: 144286Chapter: 8
Glad you've seen it through to the end, and resisted whatever temptation there may have been to transform Kit into a Mary Sue.

Though I'm left wondering what it is about dementors that provokes hunger in Changleings, instead of fear.

Reviewer: swellDate: 2006-05-16
Reviewid: 142847Chapter: 7
This is such a good concept. I had been checking it regularly, and cheered at the latest installment, but now updates are not available it seems.

Please dont abandon this fic, its too good to leave just because the HP universe has moved on.

Reviewer: AdagioDate: 2006-03-27
Reviewid: 141378Chapter: 7

I'm just wondering if you plan to continue with this story. I've enjoyed it and Eshu's Daughter before and would like to read more.

Reviewer: AdagioDate: 2006-03-06
Reviewid: 140621Chapter: 7
I've really enjoyed the two Eshu stories thus far. You've created some interesting characters - not to mention a very interesting story. Hopefully we'll see an update soon. Please keep writing.

Reviewer: ArimalkaDate: 2006-02-05
Reviewid: 139396Chapter: 7
My goodness! This was an extremely interesting chapter. It's so weird that Serena and Kit have somehow...switched roles? I dunno. Like now, Serena is offering her friendship to Kit.

Reviewer: shiikiDate: 2006-02-05
Reviewid: 139362Chapter: 7
You've set up this story so nicely that it doesn't seem weird to have Kit turn out to be a strange creature... well done! I liked her reaction when she found well as Serena's loyalty to her (Kit's friendly overtures have paid off, haven't they!)
And this line: 'We may not find ourselves heaped in glory and excitement, but our house is the sap that holds this school together.' How very Hufflepuff!

Reviewer: revolvingstaircaseDate: 2006-01-19
Reviewid: 138727Chapter: 6
I never read this before. I like it. Most times people write American characters and they're stupid and you wrote this and its really good. I like how you made Kit sometimes do stupid stuff because she's like everyone and has problems and is confused. And I like the way you wrote the other people in the story and her friends and you really write the professors good, too. I hope you keep writing this.

Reviewer: birdsongDate: 2006-01-15
Reviewid: 138544Chapter: 6
Welcome back! You did a good job in describing Kit's transformation and how everything was much larger to her afterwards. I especially enjoyed the closet scene and how you described Kit's emotions, especially when she fell over the buckets. Keep up the good work!

Reviewer: Diana WeiDate: 2005-10-31
Reviewid: 135533Chapter: 5
As much as I wished I could have come by here more often, but the stories I have been reading here are lagging, one of which that hadn't
been updated in nearly ten months. And the criticizement and embarressment that I had recieved nearly 18 months ago when I was finally accepted as an author but was dropped due to circumstances has led me further to not come by here as often as I used before that time.

Nevertheless, don't let my despitement of this place get to you or be discouraged from coming here because I am merely just stopping by to check on updates for continuing stories to entertain myself. It is probably due to the stress that is I usually get when I try to make a deadline for acceptance here. I find that I would never fit in here as an author as I would as a reader.

However, my purpose for coming to review is not that. I would like to say, Tapestry, your new update, and I know it's over a month or two old, is wonderful as ever before. I just wished I had came by earlier to read it.

Reviewer: june luttrellDate: 2005-10-08
Reviewid: 133997Chapter: 5
please hurry with the next chapter. I love the personality of your work.

Reviewer: JayDate: 2005-09-07
Reviewid: 131920Chapter: 5
I like this (and the prequil) your styal has certain similaritys to JKR's while still being different enough that it doesnt seem like an immitation.
i hope you continue to write kit's stpry through the years.
Thanks for writting,

Reviewer: Morag CamshronDate: 2005-08-31
Reviewid: 131437Chapter: 5
Oh my, this sentence just made me laugh and laugh: "“Don’t be silly, of course not. I’m just saying for a maniac, Sirius Black has got to work on his delivery."

I really enjoyed this chapter, Tapestry, and look forward to reading the rest of your story.

- Morag Camshron

Reviewer: birdsongDate: 2005-08-27
Reviewid: 130997Chapter: 5
Great to have you back! Have really enjoyed your story. Am waiting for more insight to Kit's first encounter with a Dementor. Kit's eyes had changed; she felt like attacking the Dementor. Will there be other transformations?
You've done a good job tying your story to Rowling's, especially the ending where it's a full moon and she hears the wolf howl. Keep up the good work!

Reviewer: Jose ArbeladaDate: 2005-08-27
Reviewid: 130994Chapter: 1
I don't actually review unless the writer has done something so bad that I think that he/she should quit. Your stories do not fall into that catagory. I enjoy your stories about Kit. I can only hope that you will write about Kit untill she finishes Hogwarts and either finds a careeer or starts a family.


Reviewer: AstridDate: 2005-08-27
Reviewid: 130992Chapter: 5
in the distance a wolf howled and Kit began to whistle. Everyone was singing tonight.

Love the dramatic irony.

This is excellent. I can't wait to read more. Good work!

Reviewer: AragogDate: 2005-08-26
Reviewid: 130917Chapter: 5
Glad to see you back.

Reviewer: birdsongDate: 2005-04-29
Reviewid: 120934Chapter: 4
I really enjoy your story, especially how you've developed your main character Kit and her powers. Please post again soon! It's been too long and I really want to see how your story progresses!

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2005-04-11
Reviewid: 119206Chapter: 4
[snicker-snaps] Great invention!

[The wind howled and screamed like a bad-tempered ghoul.] Great magical expression!

I really liked your version of the match from Hufflepuff's POV and I adored how you wrote Cedric. It almost seems as if you took it word for word from the book. Great chapter and I'm looking forward to more!

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2005-03-11
Reviewid: 116183Chapter: 3
I really like the relationship between Bearach and Kit. I also like the rhythm and tone of Bearach's speech. He definitely sounds mysterious and wise and just a bit maddening at the same time.

[There’s a squirrel outside my room that bugs me every morning because he wants to play. A jay in the backyard that insists on gossiping about how the robins are nicking all his food and stealing his wife’s nesting materials. Last week I had to listen to Flobberworms moaning about their oh so interesting lives.]

I really like how you've added a twist to an extraordinary gift. Instead of hearing all these wise, profound and useful things from animals, Kit hears a bunch of gossip and idle chit-chat. Very funny and very inventive!

“Ahhhh nasty, nasty tree man! Crawl faster Lewis, crawl faster! Ohhhh no, it got Ralph. The tree ate Ralph.” Hahahaha!!!!! I just love the juxtaposition of normal names with the wood lice!

Bearach and Serren definitely sound like a couple of siblings. Serren reminds me of Percy.

Reviewer: louisaDate: 2005-03-01
Reviewid: 115253Chapter: 3
Sounds pretty good so far, I loved the last one and look forward to more!

Reviewer: wokka42Date: 2005-02-27
Reviewid: 115070Chapter: 4
Sigh, how lovely. Tapestry, I'm sorry I haven't reviewed before, but I've been following your Eshu series for a long time now, and I think it's maybe the most imaginative OC-based series around. Kit is a delightful character to follow - a perfect Hufflepuff, with some very Gryffindorian bravery and stubbornness! I love her tomboyish pluck, and her willingness to stand up for her friends. And Puck is absolutely wonderful! He's one of the most memorable characters I've run into in fanfiction, and I love his grouchy, prickly (ha!) nature. And of course, how you keep dribbling out these tantalizing clues to Kit's true self... Altogether, well done! You have a wonderful sense of imagination, and a good knack for solid and serviceable writing as well. Keep those chapters coming! You've got an eager fan here lapping them up as they come!

Reviewer: Aura Black ChanDate: 2005-02-26
Reviewid: 114963Chapter: 4
Whoopie!!!! Hufflepuff wins! I never really gave any thought to what the rest of Diggory's house had thought about his catching the snitch like that. Obviously they would be jubulant even if he wasn't! Who could blame them for that! Will Kit run into Sirius while he's going around as Padfoot? It would be an interesting meeting if they did. How could he not be curious about a girl who could talk to animals? Certainly he couldn't tell her who he really was, since it would put her in danger, but maybe he like someone to talk to besides Crookshanks? Or maybe SHE helped him learn how to talk to him! I love this story!

Reviewer: dalfDate: 2005-02-26
Reviewid: 114959Chapter: 4
A good chapter. I do whish it was a bit longer and moved the story forward a bit more. Not a whole lot here that we don't already know from PoA.

I do have one question though. Do all animals automatically understnad human speach, or is there somethign about proximity to Kit that enables them to do so. This stems form the fact that Puck always understands what is beign said around them and I woudl rather think that Kit enables him to do this and he would not be able to not in her presance than the idea that all knarl understand english, or can learn it at anyrate.

Reviewer: KelleyDate: 2005-02-25
Reviewid: 114929Chapter: 4
Brilliant. I'm so glad you're writing this again. I had hoped that Kit might hear what the dementors were saying, but I guess she was too far away.

Reviewer: morat123Date: 2005-02-16
Reviewid: 114052Chapter: 3
I am very impressed by all the loose threads you have wound into the story about Kit and can only hope that you will keep on writing and tie them all up. I have become very caught up in your story and only wish that there were more about Kit I could read now, so please keep on writing!

Reviewer: JK AshavahDate: 2005-02-13
Reviewid: 113825Chapter: 2
Puck remains hilarious.

A nice look at the lessons from the point-of-view of a different year or of a different House. I love your characterisation of the Flobberworms as incredibly boring and always gossiping about something. It suits them.




Reviewer: JK AshavahDate: 2005-02-02
Reviewid: 112716Chapter: 1
Ch. 1:
Thought I'd read this so I know what I'm up to in Workshop. I love Kit's faux-pas whens he wakes up ... all too realistic, unfortunately! I also love her dialogue with Puck. He's great. I love the fragmented speech you give him. It works really well.

I still love the characters. Ellie and Spencer are awesome, and Kit is just ... Kit. She's fantastic. Spunky, special, but human. And funny, too! I love the bit about the man-eating rabbit!

Good puberty stuff, too. Not a nice time of life. Poor Ellie!

Interesting twist ont eh Dementor situation. I can't wait to see what's going on there, with Kit's eyes!

Good stuff. :-) I'm really enjoying this.



Reviewer: DianaDate: 2005-01-18
Reviewid: 111327Chapter: 3
Nice...Update more soon!

Reviewer: birdsongDate: 2005-01-16
Reviewid: 111029Chapter: 3
I have enjoyed your stories. I think you're doing a great job of developing Kit's character ( I can't wait to see what she can be!), the relationships aamong her friends, and her pet knarl (what is his secret?) Keep up the good work! Post again soon!

Reviewer: The Dan (BOW DOWN, MORTALS)Date: 2005-01-04
Reviewid: 109741Chapter: 1
I can't figure out why this story is getting such little attention. Just keep sticking with cannon and you'll do fine. BUT you should definitely write much more.
Consider yourself spared for now, entertainment is good.

Reviewer: TalkazeDate: 2004-11-14
Reviewid: 104845Chapter: 2
'Bout time it was updated! :D
Why did Puck glow? Knarls aren't dark objects! They're cute!
Please update again soon; I like reading a LOT!

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104581Chapter: 2
[both hands over her head like a small, ineffectual umbrella.] Great description. And don't we all do that even though we know it doesn't work!

[Predictably, Serena melted into the crowd and disappeared without a backward glance, but Ellie clung to the back of Kit’s robes and Verity was busy elbowing and shoving other students aside to keep up with the two of them.] I love how you showcase each girl's personality through her reactions in the crowd. Great technique.

[The warm light of the hall splashed over the Hufflepuff table, seeming to linger and highlight each smiling face. There were few smiles at the Slytherin table and their laughter had a nasty, sharp edge to it.] Hehehe. That reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Homer looks at all these other wonderful families bathed in soft light and then he looks at his family and the light framing them is fire and they all have horns.

[The Monster Book huddled behind her shoe and shuddered. Puck glared down at the book and snapped playfully. The Monster Book let out a howl and scrambled away, diving into Kit’s bag.] Oh, that's hilarious! I love the idea of Puck taking on the Monster Book. He's rapidly becoming my favior fanfiction pet.

[Puck tried to take his finger off. “He’s a cute little fella.”] Hehehe!!! That is such a perfect Hagrid response!

[“You know Ruth’s not making as much mucus as she use to. But will the old girl admit it? No, insists she’s young as a grub.”] Oh, I love that idea! That flobberworms are a bunch of nonstop talkers. So funny! That was an unexpected treat!

Wow! I really liked the change you made to the DADA lesson. This was really cool and it showcased Lupin a lot better. I also loved the image of a glowing blue Puck. I'm hoping he's dangerous--not touched by dark magic!

Great chapter! Looking forward to learning more about the hawk and how Kit and the Dementors will interact. I'm also looking forward to learning more about the 3rd year Hufflepuffs and Kit's interactions with them.

Reviewer: Norwegian BlueDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104555Chapter: 2
So is Puck considered a dark creature and that's why he turned blue? If so, that would be interesting. Maybe someone would do that accidentally to Remus...

Reviewer: AstridDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104503Chapter: 2
Ooh, does that mean Puck was touched by something dark?

Reviewer: AragogDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104496Chapter: 2
For the life of my I can't figure out why this or your previous story hasn't gotten more attention.

You write clear prose, your characters are well drawn, and you have stayed within the Potter fictional universe while plausibly adding to it.

Reviewer: SreyaDate: 2004-11-11
Reviewid: 104444Chapter: 2
Unfortunately, I'm exhausted, so the most creative thing I can think of to say is "Good job!"

Liked the chapter, wondering why Puck glowed blue if the charm is supposed to reveal dark magic, and looking forward to Chapter 3!

Reviewer: CatherineDate: 2004-11-11
Reviewid: 104426Chapter: 2
Still loving the interplay with the characters, and enjoyed finally getting to read this (stupid yahoo!)

Great work, Jenn.


Reviewer: ChrisDate: 2004-10-18
Reviewid: 101743Chapter: 1
Gosh, it sure is great to be reunited with Kit and her friends!! So glad the sequel is underway!

You've certainly started this with a bang, too. So many questions raised in this chapter - this fic is going to be a real page turner, isn't it?

I love the way you write Kit's character. You give her so much personality that it seems we're right there with her and each new discovery about her comes as such a pleasant surprise.

Looking forward to reading more!

Reviewer: HannahDate: 2004-10-17
Reviewid: 101687Chapter: 1
Please please PLEASE add more soon!

Reviewer: birdsongDate: 2004-10-14
Reviewid: 101388Chapter: 1
Glad you're back! You did a great job of tying cat like characteristics to the ending about her eyes. Specifically, being able to see better in the dark, wanting to rip and tear, and waiting to spring. It all tied together in your ending. Great job! Keep it up! And write again soon!

Reviewer: Aura Black ChanDate: 2004-10-10
Reviewid: 100976Chapter: 1
Just wanted to leave a review here! This is still one of the best fics I've read! You give your characters enough room for development without making them seem out of place in the Harry Potter world. Please update this soon!

Reviewer: Aura Black ChanDate: 2004-10-10
Reviewid: 100975Chapter: 1
Just wanted to leave a review here! This is still one of the best fics I've read! Will Lupin pop in to check on them?

Reviewer: JenDate: 2004-10-08
Reviewid: 100833Chapter: 1
Hi! So glad to see this storyline coming alive again! I have enjoyed Eshu's Daughter so much, and am very happy to see the sequal!

Reviewer: Erica WinberryDate: 2004-10-07
Reviewid: 100704Chapter: 1
You know, I was just thinking the other day, "I wonder when we'll get to see the sequel to Eshu's Daughter?" <laugh>

I'm very glad to see Kit, Puck and the rest back, and I can't wait to see what you have in store for them in Kit's second year. As always, the story and characters have sucked me in, and I can't wait to read the next installment. I missed my favorite OC's!

Reviewer: CaseyDate: 2004-10-07
Reviewid: 100642Chapter: 1
I demand chapter 2! Okay, I don't exactly demand it, but I do wait not so patiently like everyone else. I love the story so far and I can't wait to see where you take it. I like seeing a main character in Hufflepuff too, we dont get enough of them. It seems to be the forgotten house sometimes.

Good story, keep it up. :)

Reviewer: CornedBeeDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100596Chapter: 1
Great start into the second part. Harry could have used Kit's assistance :)

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100590Chapter: 1
[Puck got to his feet and made a show of turning so his prickly little butt faced Kit] Oh, I'm so happy you're writing the sequel to Eshu! I absolutely adore Puck! He's got such an attitude!

[waving as though being attacked by a swarm of bees] Great description!

I love how you set the scene in Flourish and Blotts. You really capture the hustle and bustle of the magical world. I also like the growing antagonism between Spencer and Ellie, just like real brothers and sisters!

[Ellie's face turned the bright red of a cherry. "mmmmbra, " she muttered.] Awww, I love how you deal with puberty! JKR doesn't get into details too much and it's sweet and refreshing to see teenagers mortified beyond belief over something like a bra instead of morphing into slutty sex gods.

[bubble bounce. It was rather like playing marbles five feet off the ground, only the bubbles had the added benefit of exploding with a loud pop and a shower of sparks when they hit in mid-air. Points were given based on the size of the explosion and the violence of the attack.] Ooooh! This sounds really cool! Very inventive and original!

Oooh, the scene with the Dementor was chilling. I like the twist of Kit wanting to attack the Dementor in an animalistic type way and the change in her eyes. I'm also curious to know more about Serena's past to know why she reacted so badly to the Dementor and why she is so unpleasant and antisocial.

Great chapter! I hope chapter 2 is up soon! PoA is my favorite book and I always love seeing another POV. I'm especially eager to see how Kit and Buckbeak interact. Great story!

Reviewer: CatherineDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100556Chapter: 1
VERY nice to see Kit and her friends back in action. It's like revisiting old friends!


Reviewer: AragogDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100538Chapter: 1
Props to you. I've become such a curmudgeon anymore that I'll only give a writer half a page to convince me they're worth reading. Your characters are believable, your grammar isn't horrible, and your prose is tight, so I'll keep reading. That, and I like your take on what goes on in Hufflepuff house. And I want to find out why Kit's response to dementors is so predatory.

Glad to see you back.

Reviewer: DalfDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100537Chapter: 1

Well worth the wait! I know I sent you some emails when you were writing the first one but .... a really good start to a new one!

I must say I have a weakness for non-mary-sue OC fics and Eshu's Daughter is one of the best. This one looks like it will follow in that tradition.

Puck is intresting now that he talks more. And I wonder what just happened with teh dementor! Will Remus reconize her for what she is?

Reviewer: SreyaDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100518Chapter: 1
HOORAY! Kit's back! *dances around*

Cat's eyes, huh? Sounds like Kit's going to continue surprising herself in this story -- and her friends!

Reviewer: ClothoDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100507Chapter: 1
Ooooh, and we're off to an exciting start! I cannot wait to learn what all of Kit's powers are, I've been dying to ever since you started her story. Keep up the good work!

Reviewer: Alabaster BlackDate: 2004-10-06
Reviewid: 100506Chapter: 1
Oh, I'm so happy you've started a sequel! I really like this so far.......Serena is an interesting character and I hope you continue to develop her further. I'm glad Kit and Ellie have stayed friends with Verity, too! Puck is awesome as always......and I can't wait to meet the centaur keep writing, PLEASE! Update soon! (I'm your first review!!)

The Sugar Quill was created by Zsenya and Arabella. For questions, please send us an Owl!

-- Powered by SQ3 : Coded by David : Design by James --