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Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 91

Reviewer: ChocolatequeenDate: 2005-09-25
Reviewid: 133190Chapter: 8
I read the first 6 chapters of this on another website and was completely enthralled... and a little disappointed that it wasn't finished yet. ;) Then today I read another one of your stories here at SQ and somehow realized that you had in fact finished this one... went into your profile and found it, read it, and wish it hadn't ended.

There is so much that I love about this story, but I think my favorite part is Mr. Ollivander. You took someone who is really a fairly minor character and filled in the details. The result is a man who is much more layered and real than he is in the books, and yet he is still the same person--we just know more about him now. Thank you so much for sharing your delightful storytelling ability with us.

PS: I also enjoy the notes to your wife at the end of the chapters. She's a lucky woman.

Reviewer: SaraDate: 2005-08-17
Reviewid: 130199Chapter: 8
Aaran, I enjoyed your history immensely, thanks a lot! I've just started reading yesterday and couldn't let it go... especially the Stonehenge part... and many many others, I love history so well rewritten with a lot of rev/ferences and humour in it... what a pity it's over now ;-)

Reviewer: PigwidgeonDate: 2005-08-07
Reviewid: 129172Chapter: 3
Again, I love the thought and research you've put into this, it shows. You hand;e the dialogue very nicely' the people obviously aren't from our era, but you can still follow it. I wonder if Willen will turn out to be an ancestor of Ollivander's...

Reviewer: Cat FeralDate: 2005-07-20
Reviewid: 127493Chapter: 1
Well, I certainly enjoyed Chapter One. Willen kind of reminds me of Neville. He's in for a bit of a let-down, though, when he learns that olive wood from the south coast of Gaul isn't necessarily the best wand for everyone. Well, I take it he is an ancestor of the Olivander family? Wait: Ollivander -- olive wood -- Got it!

Reviewer: CornedBeeDate: 2005-07-15
Reviewid: 127203Chapter: 8
A great story with an astounding claim to "historical accuracy", and a rather unique story telling order. (I became quite confused at times, but it was wonderful because it was a story telling.)

I have one criticism, though. The one thing that really annoyed me is your use of sounds during direct speech, like "sniff" or "choke". I can't help it - it simply looks like a very cheap comic book or something.

Reviewer: C-chanDate: 2005-07-11
Reviewid: 126798Chapter: 8
I stayed up till 5 AM last night reading this. I didn't finish before I went to bed, but I tried very hard to do so.

I'm lacking in imagination at the moment, so I can't think of more creative ways to say "I really liked this story."

Also, if you ever revise this story, I'd recommend taking out a little bit of the Veela's accent. It's a bit too hard to read.

Reviewer: Reader2Date: 2005-06-10
Reviewid: 123573Chapter: 8
Quite Delightful. Thanks.

Reviewer: Geena WatersDate: 2005-06-06
Reviewid: 123407Chapter: 8
Wow. Iíve always had a bit of an interest in history. I must say though, Iíve never found ďhistoryĒ so interesting. I know youíve heard this a lot, but I have to tell you youíve done an absolutely amazing job with this. I donít generally read stories that arenít based around the more main characters, but Iím glad I read this one. It makes everything seem so real. I truly wish that all of this existed; it would just be too cool! But then again, I wouldnít know about it would I, lol. I was so happy when Willen realized that the Holly wood and phoenix feather would work for a wand. My name is Holly so you know; I always like to hear of the use of Holly wood, lol. Reading the battle scene made me so depressed because of all the people that died, but to be realistic it was needed. I truly appreciate you ability to stay realistic throughout this whole thing. There are too many fanfiction writers who donít make their stories realistic enough and I know that fanfiction is about writing what you want to write about, but in the end, itís much more satisfying to read a story like this than to read a fluffy, no plot, everyoneís happy and no one gets hurt story.

I also thoroughly enjoyed descriptiveness throughout the entire story. It was very well done. I know a lot of people who complain when an author uses to much description (Tolkien in LOTR for example), but I happen to love it. It just makes everything more vivid. Have you ever considered actually writing your own novel? I know Iím nothing of a literary expert, but I think I can identify talented writing when I see it. Since you majored in history you could write a great history novel, youíre well on your way with this one. As interesting as history is, it can also be very dull if your not careful and donít learn it the right way, although what the write way is I wouldnít knowÖmaybe it all comes down to the teacher and the textbook.

When reading your story I did sort of feel, at times, that I was reading out of a history textbook. But there were so many more times when it felt like a story. I hope Iím not repeating myself. I guess I could check to see, but Iím very tired, itís late at night, and I really should be asleep right now, but I had to write this review while the story is fresh in my mind. Iíve spent the last 5 or so days reading your whole story and let me tell you, there were times when I couldnít wait to get out of class and get access to a computer so I could continue reading. Also, as much as cliffhangers can suck, I appreciated them when I knew that all I had to do was click a button and the next chapter would be right there. Not having to wait while you finished writing the story was nice. I liked being able to read the whole thing without waiting months to see what comes next. I was just lucky that I found it now then and instead of when you were writing. Now youíre story ĎGreat Scott! Potter This is War!Ē story is still in the process (I hope), but I will wait patiently for the next installment. I have to get as much fanfiction reading in as I can from now until September because Iíll be moving in with my Grandma to attend University and she doesnít have the internet or an answering machine, lol, although weíve all been telling her to get oneÖan answering machine that is.

I apologize. Iíve been writing things you probably donít care about, but I have been trying to remember as much as I could about the story to talk about in my review. Iím getting a little better at reviewingÖwhen I try, and I only really try when I really enjoy the story. I must say, this is I think the longest review I have ever written, oh my. Oh and about thinking about this story for a long while after reading itÖI can say that Iíve dreamt about it :S. At least about Eirren, Willen, and a fishing boat out in the ocean. Now Iíve been running on very little sleep lately and I donít always remember my dreamsÖit seems that itís just the violent ones I remember. Anyway, Iím a fan of the show LOST (even though itís really not that great of a show if you were to critique itÖto be honest I just started watching it because of Dominic Monaghan and I kept watching it to find out what happens) and although I wasnít able to watch the season finale I was informed that Saywer was shot and fell into the water and the other guys on the raft were left in the water as well and my sister said something about attracting sharks. So in my dream Willen and Eirren are on the fishing boat, Eirren is in a fit of madness, falls overboard, and is eventually attacked by a shark. Instead of screaming out in agony, he (because of the madness) proceeds to laugh hysterically. Now he is almost right up against the boat when an even stranger thing happensÖ.grapes start spewing everywhereÖgreen grapes to be exact. I think the grapes came into the dream because Willen at grapes for the first time in prison with Eirren. I think they were fairly close to the shore, but Iím not entirely sure. I have no idea what it means, if it means anything. I also have nothing against Eirren, I rather like the old fellow to be quite honest. I have no idea why it was him who was attacked by the shark or why there was even a shark that far northÖbut then again it was a dream and as far as I know dreams arenít supposed to make much sense, lol.

So now that you know Iíve dreamt about some of your characters and that Iím totally insane, I think I will sign off. Iím excited about the prospect of more to come with your other story Iíve previously mentioned. I wish you well in the future and I hope you get this review, because it would be such a shame if I wasted all this time for nothing. I think the safest thing to do would be to email it to you as well as writing it on Sugar Quill. Oh I love Sugar Quill, it (and itís authors, lol) has provided me with many, many hours of entertainmen in the past and Iím sure will continue to do so in the future. Good luck with any future writings and such, have a great summer (yeah I canít wait!), and I hope you enjoyed this review, even if all it was good for was a slight chuckle. Thank you for writing such a wonderful piece!

~GW

Reviewer: Geena WatersDate: 2005-06-06
Reviewid: 123405Chapter: 8
Wow. Iíve always had a bit of an interest in history. I must say though, Iíve never found ďhistoryĒ so interesting. I know youíve heard this a lot, but I have to tell you youíve done an absolutely amazing job with this. I donít generally read stories that arenít based around the more main characters, but Iím glad I read this one. It makes everything seem so real. I truly wish that all of this existed; it would just be too cool! But then again, I wouldnít know about it would I, lol. I was so happy when Willen realized that the Holly wood and phoenix feather would work for a wand. My name is Holly so you know; I always like to hear of the use of Holly wood, lol. Reading the battle scene made me so depressed because of all the people that died, but to be realistic it was needed. I truly appreciate you ability to stay realistic throughout this whole thing. There are too many fanfiction writers who donít make their stories realistic enough and I know that fanfiction is about writing what you want to write about, but in the end, itís much more satisfying to read a story like this than to read a fluffy, no plot, everyoneís happy and no one gets hurt story.

I also thoroughly enjoyed descriptiveness throughout the entire story. It was very well done. I know a lot of people who complain when an author uses to much description (Tolkien in LOTR for example), but I happen to love it. It just makes everything more vivid. Have you ever considered actually writing your own novel? I know Iím nothing of a literary expert, but I think I can identify talented writing when I see it. Since you majored in history you could write a great history novel, youíre well on your way with this one. As interesting as history is, it can also be very dull if your not careful and donít learn it the right way, although what the write way is I wouldnít knowÖmaybe it all comes down to the teacher and the textbook.

When reading your story I did sort of feel, at times, that I was reading out of a history textbook. But there were so many more times when it felt like a story. I hope Iím not repeating myself. I guess I could check to see, but Iím very tired, itís late at night, and I really should be asleep right now, but I had to write this review while the story is fresh in my mind. Iíve spent the last 5 or so days reading your whole story and let me tell you, there were times when I couldnít wait to get out of class and get access to a computer so I could continue reading. Also, as much as cliffhangers can suck, I appreciated them when I knew that all I had to do was click a button and the next chapter would be right there. Not having to wait while you finished writing the story was nice. I liked being able to read the whole thing without waiting months to see what comes next. I was just lucky that I found it now then and instead of when you were writing. Now youíre story ĎGreat Scott! Potter This is War!Ē story is still in the process (I hope), but I will wait patiently for the next installment. I have to get as much fanfiction reading in as I can from now until September because Iíll be moving in with my Grandma to attend University and she doesnít have the internet or an answering machine, lol, although weíve all been telling her to get oneÖan answering machine that is.

I apologize. Iíve been writing things you probably donít care about, but I have been trying to remember as much as I could about the story to talk about in my review. Iím getting a little better at reviewingÖwhen I try, and I only really try when I really enjoy the story. I must say, this is I think the longest review I have ever written, oh my. Oh and about thinking about this story for a long while after reading itÖI can say that Iíve dreamt about it :S. At least about Eirren, Willen, and a fishing boat out in the ocean. Now Iíve been running on very little sleep lately and I donít always remember my dreamsÖit seems that itís just the violent ones I remember. Anyway, Iím a fan of the show LOST (even though itís really not that great of a show if you were to critique itÖto be honest I just started watching it because of Dominic Monaghan and I kept watching it to find out what happens) and although I wasnít able to watch the season finale I was informed that Saywer was shot and fell into the water and the other guys on the raft were left in the water as well and my sister said something about attracting sharks. So in my dream Willen and Eirren are on the fishing boat, Eirren is in a fit of madness, falls overboard, and is eventually attacked by a shark. Instead of screaming out in agony, he (because of the madness) proceeds to laugh hysterically. Now he is almost right up against the boat when an even stranger thing happensÖ.grapes start spewing everywhereÖgreen grapes to be exact. I think the grapes came into the dream because Willen at grapes for the first time in prison with Eirren. I think they were fairly close to the shore, but Iím not entirely sure. I have no idea what it means, if it means anything. I also have nothing against Eirren, I rather like the old fellow to be quite honest. I have no idea why it was him who was attacked by the shark or why there was even a shark that far northÖbut then again it was a dream and as far as I know dreams arenít supposed to make much sense, lol.

So now that you know Iíve dreamt about some of your characters and that Iím totally insane, I think I will sign off. Iím excited about the prospect of more to come with your other story Iíve previously mentioned. I wish you well in the future and I hope you get this review, because it would be such a shame if I wasted all this time for nothing. I think the safest thing to do would be to email it to you as well as writing it on Sugar Quill. Oh I love Sugar Quill, it (and itís authors, lol) has provided me with many, many hours of entertainmen in the past and Iím sure will continue to do so in the future. Good luck with any future writings and such, have a great summer (

Reviewer: AstridDate: 2005-05-15
Reviewid: 122100Chapter: 8
I actually finished reading this in the wee hours of the morning today but was too tired to review.

Excellent work!! I loved how Olive Hander became Ollivander. I also thought the bit about Smith never becoming a common name was clever. Good work creating Diagon Alley and the division between Muggles and witches and wizards.

Reviewer: ShandaDate: 2005-04-28
Reviewid: 120866Chapter: 8
What a wonderful story!! I love the "research" and the "factual" nature of the story. Please write more soon as I look forward to your writing.

Reviewer: CootiePatootieDate: 2005-04-25
Reviewid: 120630Chapter: 8
The Quill ate my first review, so I'll try again.
I like the way you resolved the EVIL!cliffie at the end of the last chapter. I was so glad there wasn't a child, just a child-sized pyre.
How sad for Constantia - how utterly senseless for the people. How much like today it was.
There were some things I particularly enjoyed or found poignantly true:
"What sunlight showed itself looked like it had eaten bad food that needed to come back up. The skies might have been said to look leaden, but they looked like lead with yellow ochre mixed in. The combination was impossible, but if one could produce such a concoction, it would look like the skies overhead." How do you do that? If I tried to be so descriptive, it would come out like bad hamburger. You truly have a gift, sir.
"Save the girl. Save the towne. Write of your victory soon." Unwavering faith has strengthened many a weak resolve. It is always to have someone on your side who believes in you absolutely. (In my opinion, Ron and Hermione's greatest roles in canon!)
"bigotry needs no basis in fact" this is sad but true.
Finally, one thing I didn't like:
"Gulp. You knew?" The addition of the gulp, huff, puff, sniff, etc. detracted from the fine pace of your story. Next time, leave it to the descriptions in the narrative. Please don't be offended that I say this. Your writing is so fine otherwise that this just doesn't meet the usual high quality. :)
Thanks for a great ending to a great story. Bonzer, mate! (Since I've been using my BritSlang this whole story to review, I have to use my AussieSlang now!!!! ha ha ha ha!)

Reviewer: AprilDate: 2005-04-23
Reviewid: 120376Chapter: 1
This is a very neat story! I love stories told from a different perspective, and you are narrating this one well! Wonder what Porto's agenda is, hmmm. Willem is an interesting character. I really like how you have magical ability called "The Touch" back then -- very nice detail, particulalry since this seems to be before the widespread use of wands. I certainly look forward to reading more, but the hour grows late. Another night!

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2005-04-22
Reviewid: 120344Chapter: 8
Sorry I don't have time for a decent review. This was a great read, and what I like best was the little blurbs from the future. Each one had the promise to be a great fic in themselves.

I was glad to see that the battle was horrible and that there was no celebration by the victors. Made it more real to me.

Reviewer: LieselDate: 2005-04-21
Reviewid: 120278Chapter: 8
Thank you so much! I enjoyed your story from beginning to end. Not only was it well written with strategic cliff hangers, it was a great backstory to a minor character, which I always enjoy. I look forward to reading more of your work!

Reviewer: beckDate: 2005-04-21
Reviewid: 120263Chapter: 8
WOW what a chapter it took me 4 days to read that one and what a whooper of a chapter I loved how you tied up all the loose ends and questions that one could possably have in the ending =) and i love how you had the word wand come about and the name ollivander that was great. I do hope you write more stories because i have really enjoyed this one =) once again great job well done

Reviewer: EntiDate: 2005-04-21
Reviewid: 120238Chapter: 8
This was a brilliant conclusion to a brilliant story. I actually took rather some time to read it as when I first saw you'd posted the last chapter, I started reading it only to be kicked out of the computer room at school.. And then at home internet refused to work.. But it was well worth the waiting. Everything fits, the only tiny tiny thingie is that I got all confused by the naming of everybody's children after the ones who died (which is to blame only on my state of mind, completely blown away by this great story) - there's actually a fic here somewhere on the SQ about Harry/Hermione working out in that way, I'm sort of reminded of that now. But even though a bit confusing, it was very beautiful, especially Caedric. Yes. It's over now.. I sort of expected to be sad about that but this was such a grand finale that I'm actually just very content now. And your final note (though it's none of my business, of course) is very beautiful. She must be very lucky with a man like you. Thank you for this story, and I'm looking out for the next one (I think you mentioned somewhere that you had an idea already?).

ENti

Reviewer: Elena TirielDate: 2005-04-21
Reviewid: 120232Chapter: 8
I'm so glad I discovered your story! Very interesting read. I quite enjoyed all the real history and the fictional history that you pulled together.

Nice work! (I stayed up all night reading it... couldn't put it down.)

- Barbara

Reviewer: JackDoorDate: 2005-04-20
Reviewid: 120159Chapter: 8
This will by no means be a long review, but having read all the chapters, I just wanted to say:

Fantastic, and thank you.

Reviewer: LupiniaDate: 2005-04-20
Reviewid: 120145Chapter: 8
Fantastic! Perfect!

<< "I fight for Loundon's Towne. Your husband's name shall never leave this city on the Tameas. You will spit on the grave of Porto the Druid." >>
Sometimes, while reading, you come across a sentence that strikes you, that resonates deeply in you (if you get my meaning?). Well, this one went straight to my heart. Such quiet determination and we know it will prove to be true.

The end of Chapter 8, from "Stellan took over the narrative" to "Willen's Luck" is just the perfect conclusion for the story, with this little difference of level between the events taking place inside the story and the hindsight we, readers, benefit from to appreciate the irony of them.

Very clever mix of Muggle and magical history (Stonehenge, the Romans, etc.)

The explanation of the double L in Ollivander got me in a fit of giggles.

If you remember, in my last review, I said I was eager to know how you'd make the word "wand" replace "magic stick". You really made me wait until the very end, didn't you? But it was worth the wait.

Maybe you could have added a tiny paragraph somewhere, leading the reader to think that Egorn the Potter was an ancestor of Harry's family. (I remember you made a vague allusion to it in one of the first chapters, when you said something along the lines of "You Potters have always been too brave for your own good.")

Thank you for a great reading time!

Reviewer: SusanDate: 2005-04-20
Reviewid: 120115Chapter: 8
This was just a wonderful story. It's exactly what I like from a Harry Potter fiction. An imaginative filling in of the history. A wonderous sketch of a backstory. And most importantly, a just plain fun read.

Thanks!

Reviewer: HalanDate: 2005-04-19
Reviewid: 120077Chapter: 8
There are no words to describe how fantastic this story was. I feel like Willen, in that I'm trying to discover new words that will work but come up short.

I have followed this story ever since the first chapter went up. I remember reading the first chapter and being confused as to what it was going on, but then after seeing names slightly changed, I realized how everything began to fit together. Subtle references to current characters (like the Potters) or places (like the Diagon) made me chuckle to myself (or out loud sometimes). Detailed descriptions of failures and successes in building and creating plows, bows, swords, etc made me shake my head in agreement and think "Yeah, it probably did happen somewhat like that." And everytime Willen would get into trouble because of his fantastic luck, I would plow on with excitment to see what would happen next.

As I said, words cannot describe how wonderful this story was, and I cannot describe how joyous I am to have read it. Everytime SugarQuill updated, I anxiously looked for this story to be on the list of updates, being filled with disappointment when it was not and filled with excitement when it was. Reading a chapter always took a chunk out of my day (due to the length, complexity, and scope of each chapter) but it was always an enjoyable chunk. I also rather enjoyed the Historical Notes that always appeared at the end of each chapter, as they usually answered questions that I had come across during my readings.

I could go on and on about the many things that I enjoyed throughout this story (I really could, I have a list in my head of all of the things that kept me so enthralled), but i'll stop for now. Suffice to say, I am glad to see everything resolved but I am sad to see this story end. These characters have come to life through your words, and I feel like I did upon finishing other such detailed works; sad and wishing I could read about them more.

I hope that we will hear of Willen some other time (though I feel much doubt in that hope), and I hope you will continue writing for the enjoyment of others.

Reviewer: MiaRoseDate: 2005-04-19
Reviewid: 120073Chapter: 8
Wow. What a Chapter. What a story. You are brilliant. I can't find much else to say except well done, this is a great accomplishment. Oh, and one other thing. The other day I was thinking about HP fanfiction in general, and it occured to me that many stories, such as yours, barely relate to Harry Potter's world. If you took out the parts about Harry and Mr Ollivander and maybe a couple of other references here and there to JKR's world, this could probably stand on it's own as a regular novel.

Reviewer: Red RiderDate: 2005-04-19
Reviewid: 119984Chapter: 8
Amazing, simply amazing.

Few fanfics have a sense of completion anywhere close to this tale. You have drawn all aspects together and answered all questions. The characters are all well-rounded and realistic - within the context of fantasy. This was a life lived by real people once you were done with the chronicle of their lives.

What you did with Stonehenge and Woodhenge was particularly clever and droll - Muggles today are still baffled - great!

The discussion at the burial. down to the explanation of "spitting on their grave," was so - inspired - in the context of what Willen had learned in his travels. And his final explanation to Stellan - Brilliant!

Reviewer: seamusisevilDate: 2005-04-19
Reviewid: 119968Chapter: 8
wow im so happy and so sad that i cant really describe it any other way this story is so good that i have read it at least a dozen times it will continue to be one of my favorites and i will probally re-read it many times in the future now i guess the only thing left un-answered is
1)what will your next story be about
2)when will we be able to read it
3)and most important how am i supposed wait like a good reader without whinning like a spoiled brat for it to be published

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2005-03-30
Reviewid: 118180Chapter: 7
Love your chapter sizes.

A good chapter, but I've become too used to having a fight in every one of your chapters lately. I found this one a bit boring overall and my eyes started to glaze over a bit on the explanation of the social system that Porto came from. That said I've read the chapter twice (skipping Porto on the second), enjoying each time. Hope you update soon.

Reviewer: LupiniaDate: 2005-03-30
Reviewid: 118157Chapter: 7
I find myself in quite a predicament: I said to myself that I'd review each new chapter, but your story is so good that all I have to say is: "another wonderful chapter!", which isn't a very constructive review, I'm afraid.
I said in my first review that I liked linguistics, and that I loved the way you imagined how magic-related words were created. In this chapter, I laughed out loud when I saw Eirran's smudged letter and the transformation of 'phoenix' in 'Fawkes' (so that makes Fawkes named after the Egyptian word for 'phoenix', right?)
I'm on my toes as to how you'll make the word 'wand' appear. Don't disappoint me, please!
I'm still stumped about Willen's wand's core. I suppose the most logical solution would be one of Pholx's feather, but Fawkes only gave two feathers, for Riddle and Harry. Well, I guess I just have to waitÖ
That's all, folks! (I mean 'Pholx', of courseÖ Sorry. Couldn't resist.)

Reviewer: MiaRoseDate: 2005-03-29
Reviewid: 118111Chapter: 7
Only one more left? Darn. Though I have been looking foward to the final battle, and I want to know what is happening at that end bit. My favorite line from this chapter was the "Curious, most curious." I suppose it's just an Ollivander thing. And I like that you gave Willen Dumbledore's Fawks. It suits him. Willen would have been a Gryffindor, of course.

And thanks for reccommending Ozma's stories! off to read them right now...

Reviewer: ShandaDate: 2005-03-29
Reviewid: 118066Chapter: 7
What a fantastic story! I find myself thinking about Willen and Loundon's Towne long after I am done reading. I love the way you brought in the origins of Diagon Alley and the "reference notes" at the bottom of each chapter. As a historian myself, it makes for most interesting reading.

Reviewer: beckDate: 2005-03-28
Reviewid: 117960Chapter: 7
what a great chapter it took me like 3 days to read it i cant wait to find out what happens =) and i loved it want Eirran said "he knew there would be no marital closeness tonight" LOL that was great and i loved how you described Willen when Stellan saw him on the cliffs =) great job and once again cant wait for the update =)

Reviewer: LindaDate: 2005-03-28
Reviewid: 117943Chapter: 7
Aaron,
Fabulous story. The unexpected hero, and Willen, the Olive Hand Maker~ Olivander. You have talent, and I appreciate reading this well researched and thought out story. Many people can relate to Willen's luck, and it is thematic to a universal law, better known as Murphy's.
I really do enjoy this story, and I look forward to your next update.
A question that I have is, did Ninato and Nerta teach Willen how to set up disillustionment charms, and the Diagonal wall that Porto put a terminating charm on what I assume is to become Diagon alley. And a Last Question, who has died?
Thanks for taking the time to read this terribly put together review.
Linda

Reviewer: FalkDate: 2005-03-27
Reviewid: 117829Chapter: 3
I really like your story! I did something I don't do much (with the exception of Birgit's stories) I put up my away messages and told everyone who called me to let me read this story I was in the process of and if I had time when I was finished I'd get back to them. (I hope you take that in the form of a compliment.)

Reviewer: EntiDate: 2005-03-26
Reviewid: 117764Chapter: 7
This was so very good.. as always I might add.. Very alive and I love all the discoveries along the road.. But now it's almost over? I know I could keep reading more and more of Willen's discoveries and how the town goes on after he's back..

Reviewer: SarahDate: 2005-03-26
Reviewid: 117759Chapter: 7
BAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! who's on the pyre!?????? noooooo!!!!!!!!!!

Reviewer: seamusisevilDate: 2005-03-26
Reviewid: 117750Chapter: 7
WOW!!!!!!!!!!
this chapter was so good i cant describe how good it is
bu... wha... ma... na... goo... <- me speachless and that dont happen very often :)
t.g.d. is your other story (the granger defence)as for the surprise in someones past you inadvertantly cleared that up my bad
damn i hate being wrong about things like that
i am looking foward to the next chapter with both joy and saddness in that there is more to this story but only that one chapter hopefully if there is enough pressure put on you by the other readers of this story who enjoy it as much as i have you will consider a follow up to it
until then you will always have at least one faithful reader out way out there

Reviewer: CootiePatootieDate: 2005-03-26
Reviewid: 117749Chapter: 7
1) I really enjoyed how Willen discovered/created/intuited the way to split the wood and insert the wand cores. I am a sometime woodworker, and my hubby is a fairly serious woodworker, and to read this passage was a treat.
2) Love Pholx (Fawkes). Soooo glad he has stayed with Willen. The healing of the lazy eye was a surprise and a treat! ( I guess treat is my word o' the day)
3) So glad Willen got a message to Constantia - she is a great character, and to see her reassured is nice
4) All eyes were on the three pyre platforms.

Two were the size for adults.

One was just the right size to say a sad farewell to a child.

WHAT????? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

this is an evil cliffie by the way!!!

I have really enjoyed this latest update on what has quickly become on of my favorite favorite stories in HP fanficdom. You have a very engaging style of writing. When I'm reading I am not interrupted by poor grammar or literary/temporal inconsistencies. Your style flows so nicely. Once again, I am struck by the believability of Willen's story. I am, like you, full of curiosity. I love the thrill you get when you connect one fact to another, or you connect a word to its origins, or when you understand a reference to an obscure source. You definately put enough in your work to satisfy those of us who are like that, but your work is so good that it has much wider appeal (and hopefully will inspire more people to become curious!)

Loved "teknologie"!

Loved "Curious, most curious"!

but especially loved "...These are marvelous days to be alive. What could possible be left to invent?"

"A husband that pays attention to what he's doing."

"What, my dear?"

"Nothing, dear. Have you tried it?"

"What?" Eirran had hardly taken his eyes or apparently his mind from his new power concentrator.

"Have you tried it to see if it is indeed more powerful? What is the spell you two usually cast to test different things?"

Concentrating on his wife's question, Eirran had lowered the new combined and internalized unicorn hair carved olive stick to his side with it pointed out and away from him. Subconsciously he remembered Willen accidentally setting him on fire one afternoon in the dungeon, but he did not remember the lesson completely.

"What spell? Oh, do you mean the Incendio spell?"

The end of the couple's bedding pallet caught on fire and it took several clay pots of bathing water to put it out. Pholx's song was barely able to give Eirran courage and calm Glanis from violence.

Eirran knew there would be no marital closeness tonight."

I laughed and laughed. My husband was not so amused. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Reviewer: p0tterfanDate: 2005-03-24
Reviewid: 117567Chapter: 1
Well, this isn't related to the first chapter, but I just realized you're the author of The Greatest Wizard Who Ever Lived. Now that was quite the humorous story :) You're definitely on my authors to watch list now :)

Actually, now that I'm on the first chapter page again, I now remember what got me really interested in the story. I think it was the way you got the origin of words into the story. Esp. Loundon/having a potter, plus who can resist a hero with a streak of freaky luck?

Reviewer: p0tterfanDate: 2005-03-24
Reviewid: 117566Chapter: 6
What a great story. I can honestly say that I've never read (perhaps because of my aversion to reading ofc-character stories) a potterverse story not comprising of any of the main characters.

This has got to be one of the most interesting and enjoyable stories on sugar quill. Its lucky I stumbled upon the story. I find it hard to find stories on the quill because of the interface of finding/archiving stories. The searches always brings up a variety of stories, that I might not have a particular affinity to. Usually I read the snapshot summary and decide to read the story or not. Your summary was interesting enough to pique my curiosity and I've loved reading all the chapters. I should probably go and review each chapter individuall, but being the lazy bum I am I'm just reviewing at this stage, only because I couldn't stop reading once I had started reading your story.

Sincerely looking forward to the next two chapters of your story. I must mention one more thing, and that is the length of your chapters. One thing that annoys me is short chapters. (<1000 words) Your story is on the complete other spectrum, and reading each chapter seems so substantial.

Anyhow, enough of the gushing I believe. Keep up the good work. I'll have to read any other stories you have on here as well, or elsewhere if not on the quill!

Reviewer: beckDate: 2005-03-07
Reviewid: 115789Chapter: 6
what a amazing chapter it took me all weekend and all of today to find time to read it. it was very good and im dyeing to find out how willen survies and to find out it the scarlet bird is fawkes or another pheonix =)

Reviewer: LupiniaDate: 2005-03-07
Reviewid: 115765Chapter: 6
Madame Lupinia here, reporting from the Dťpartement d'Etudes sur les Dťbuts et l'Antique Pratique des Arts Magiques en Gaule, French branch of the International Institute of Research on the Development of Witchcraft and Wizardry Arts.
> I would like to congratulate and thank Mr St Vines for the thoroughness of his research regarding the ancient use of magic in his story relating the founding of the famous wandmaking shop Ollivander's. The French wizarding community really appreciates the credit Mr St Vines gave our ancestors for the small part they played in helping Willen to discover wand-focused magic as we use it today.
> Public information: the topic of our next monthly meeting will be: "Willen's Luck, Curse or Blessing?"

Jokes aside, I really enjoy reading this story, and even though it IS true that the jumping back and forth can be a little confusing at times, a second reading clears it easily.

Very good introduction of owl post.

I keep wondering what Willen's wand's right wood/core combination will be. Holly and dragon heartstring?

Although Mr Present-Day Ollivander was a Slytherin, I have a feeling Willen would have been a Gryffindor. He has all the foolishness and recklessness required.

I have a question regarding chapters 5-6: why did you choose to use the Spanish word aceituna for olive? Of course, I understand that you needed a non-English word, but why Spanish? I have to say that apart from Gaulish, I am a loss to finding a better-suited language. (I didn't ask after chapter 5 so as not to spoil the fun for non-Spanish-speaking readers)

Now, I don't mean to disrupt your writing process but as you seem to near the end of your story, I wondered if you knew about the Redhen Publications site, where the webmaster (can't find his name) wrote a series of essays on the Potterverse. In particular, he wrote one on the history of magic (http://www.redhen-publications.com/HistoryofMagic.html) and another one on wandmaking that you might find of interest (and in complement to the one about wandmaking, there's an good editorial on http://www.mugglenet.com/editorials/thenorthtower/nt26.shtml.)

Reviewer: MiaRoseDate: 2005-03-07
Reviewid: 115738Chapter: 6
Hello Again! I was away this weekend and so was not able to read this until today. I hope the next chapter is coming soon, because I desperately want to know what happened to Willen!

I thought it was very interesting that you chose to put Mr. Ollivander in Slytherin, and I am personally glad you did. The Slytherins in the books are all very stereotype Slytherins, and it's nice that someone Harry respects turn out to be Slytherin. I thought the bit about "Smith" being such an uncommen name was very cute. And poor Willen! Walking in groves of Olive trees the whole time! : ) I suppose it's just Willen's luck though.

Just out of curiosity, how long are you planning on making this story? And too bad about Mr. Weasley. Oh well.

Reviewer: CootiePatootieDate: 2005-03-04
Reviewid: 115529Chapter: 6
Okay, so the heartstrings were known to the Slayers. Good. And he got some dragonhide out of it too. Excellent.
Whew. I am glad he chose the high road - several times over. He is a good fellow, isn't he? :-)
I love the idea of the docks to match the Daigon (and I did like the way you began Diagon Alley, I just didn't think to comment on it.)
Constantia ROCKS!!! :)
So much good about this chapter...is this our Fawkes, or another Phoenix? Love the owl. I can just imagine even our post owls being a bit, um, impatient with us humans. (Like "I KNOW that, goober!) and you captured that brilliantly with Beemy. Obviously the owls are very intelligent - and to have it discovered so soon by those Magickal folk is just right.
I like the way he comes up with new "spells" - it always seems to be very realistic.
Anyway, another grand update. I'm chuffed!

(there's another Britishism for you, and another personal favorite!!)

Reviewer: seamusisevilDate: 2005-03-04
Reviewid: 115431Chapter: 6
if i had to sum up this chapter in one word it would have to be
WHEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
cause it was one wild fun action filled ride
it's great to see that you took my advise and hogtied that muse
am i mistaken in thinking that there might be a surprise in store
for us readers about someones past that you have hinted about
if so yippee keep up the good work and please think about continueing your story t.g.d.

Reviewer: PatriciaDate: 2005-03-04
Reviewid: 115414Chapter: 6
This is a very enjoyable and well rounded story in all of its elements. I am enjoying it immensely!

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2005-03-04
Reviewid: 115403Chapter: 6
"Foolish heroics are all mine," Willen thought.
-Go Willen! I like that he actually uses his brain and am quite happy that you've added a bit of brawn to him.

Most compared Constantia and Lindern to big sisters and little brothers. Some thought the two looked like owner and pet puppy.
-Made me laugh

And Willen heard none of it.
-Willen's Luck, aka no horrible pain no gain. While not a sadist at heart, I am amused how Willen must suffer so much (but gets so much in return.) I wasn't too impressed with this character at first, but now find myself checking for updates to this story everyday.

Reviewer: Emma W.Date: 2005-03-04
Reviewid: 115385Chapter: 6
im guessing the bird was a phoenix. Does he heal Willen?

Reviewer: Steven AugartDate: 2005-03-02
Reviewid: 115287Chapter: 5
It's interesting to learn the backstory of Mr. Olivander's relationship with other residents of Diagon Alley.

I like how the story alternates between Loundon's Towne and Gaul. I'm enjoying learning about bowmaking and cooperage.

Reviewer: CootiePatootieDate: 2005-02-23
Reviewid: 114740Chapter: 5
Another brilliant update. I DO so enjoy this story. I found it very interesting that Willen was able to collect not only a hank of unicorn hair, but also Veela hair for his "sticks." Since we've seen only one Veela hair wand in canon, I cannot assume that it is a common wand core, but for Willen to have it is very interesting. Of course, I fully expect him to have some Dragon heartstring soon. (But how will he know??? Oh the agony of suspense...)
Oh that filet mignon sounds delightful...must go snack now...
cheers!

Reviewer: beckDate: 2005-02-22
Reviewid: 114669Chapter: 5
love this story and i liked the ending of this chapter cant wait to find out what willen will do with this angry dragon =)

Reviewer: LupiniaDate: 2005-02-22
Reviewid: 114632Chapter: 5
Aaran St Vines, ever since I first read your story some weeks ago, I thought it reminded me of another book I had read, but I couldn't remember which one. Just last night I finally found what it was.
In my very humble opinion, your writing style is a mix of Tolkien's "Unfinished Tales" and Kipling's "Just So Stories" (in particular "How The First Letter Was Written" and "How The Alphabet Was Made").
I hope you don't feel slighted, being compared with such "poor" (ahem) competition.
I can't wait to see your next chapter! Oh, and please send my best to Charlie, will you?

Reviewer: MiaRoseDate: 2005-02-21
Reviewid: 114520Chapter: 5
First, I would like to say that I loved your Author's Historical notes. Do you know how I could get in touch with the Assistant Dragon Master? ; )

This is another well written and fun to read chapter. You really are a wonderful storyteller, I love reading about your characters. I've always been a history fan, but I never really looked into this area until I read this. Keep up the good work!

Reviewer: KateRadDate: 2005-02-21
Reviewid: 114512Chapter: 5
I've just started reading your story today, and already I've read through all five of your wonderfully thought provoking chapters. I'll ruin my eyes if I continue at this pace. You have a very unique writing style. I don't believe I've ever read anything that jumps around so much. At times it is a little confusing, but I think it keeps the story more suspenseful from bit to bit. Also, as a dancer and lover of music, I must ask, have you seen the musical Wicked? Or read the book? The line "No good deed goes unpunished" has jumped out at me several times, and only a few moments passed before I recognized it from the soundtrack. If you have, I complement you on your taste, it is a VERY good musical. Idina Menzel is amazing, the voice range she's got... unheard of. You're doing a wonderful job, keep writing!

Reviewer: AllieDate: 2005-02-19
Reviewid: 114353Chapter: 5
I usually don't read stories about peripheral characters, but I absolutely love this one.

Reviewer: JenSnufflesDate: 2005-02-19
Reviewid: 114352Chapter: 5
This is an absoutly fabulous story, it might as well be a fairy tale of sorts because I can just imagine grandmothers telling it to their grandchildren before they fall asleep. Keep up the wonderful writting, I will be waiting anxiously for the next chapter!!!

Reviewer: seamusisevilDate: 2005-02-19
Reviewid: 114337Chapter: 5
dragons ,swords ,and spies oh my
this was a really good chapter full of action,invention,discoveries and willens luck
you rock
ps ive added you to my author alert list on phoenixsong.net where you have good company on it although few in numbers as only two are on it including you but both are very talented

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2005-02-19
Reviewid: 114311Chapter: 5
I like this fic more and more with every chapter. My only worry is that the townpeople seem more than able to take care of Porto Inc and will have everything well in hand before Willen gets back. It looks to me that he better fly one of those dragons back or he will be too late to play the hero. Besides, Stellan seems nasty enough to get rid of just about anybody who could be a bother - Porto has to sleep sometime.

Excellent story. I really enjoyed the bow making process.

Reviewer: LieselDate: 2005-02-19
Reviewid: 114308Chapter: 5
Your story is absolutally amazing! I love the creativity, and I'm waiting at the edge of my seat for the next installment!

Reviewer: Date: 2005-02-09
Reviewid: 113284Chapter: 4
I am delighted with your story. As the reviewer Fran wrote, "it makes a refreshing change to the Harry/Hermione/Ginny fluff I've been reading."

I like your idea of having historical notes for your magical universe, followed by historical notes for our universe :).

Reviewer: CootiePatootieDate: 2005-02-09
Reviewid: 113230Chapter: 4
Wow oh wow oh wow. I really enjoyed this installment. I liked the interaction between Harry and Mr. Ollivander - Harry treats him respectfully but is beginning to feel a bit of kinship with him, I think - and Mr. Ollivander treats Harry with respect and not just like a "kid."
Once again, I am struck by how REAL this all seems. I can just believe that Willen is on his quest and we are hearing the true story as it happens.
Some random notes:
*love the Veela. How funny. (especially not understanding one word out of three!!)
*have come to the conclusion that Willen is a little bit like Harry, having a destiny and having to make the choices to follow that destiny
*do let us know how Harry enjoyed his meal...won't you? (after all, I was very hungry after that description!!!
*enjoyed the author/historical notes at the end. Keep those!!
I am currently enjoying two stories by you - one here and one on PhoenixSong. I am impressed that the two different divisions of HP fanfic (the military angle and the history angle) are from one very talented author!!
Keep writing. Can't wait for more!!

Reviewer: LupiniaDate: 2005-02-07
Reviewid: 113173Chapter: 4
Really great story! I love this kind of fictions where we learn the beginning of the "mythology" of a story. The Touch, the Druids, the wands, the developing difference between Dark Arts and common magic... it's so interesting! I really liked when you had Eirran say to Willen that he shouldn't try to find a Latin equivalent to the Avada Kedavra spell.

I'm not really a history buff, but I like linguistics. Reading how the Latin spells were constructed and how magic-related vocabulary (like "spell", "cast", etc.) appeared is just delightful!

Since Willen is now in France (sorry, in Gaul), and seeing the directions Eirran gave him, it seems he's going to pass near the place where I live. So if he's tired on his way, he's welcome to take a little rest there... There is a town called Cahors which already existed during the Celtic times. Actually, the inhabitants of Cahors are called "Cadurciens"; this word derives from the name of the Celtic tribe that lived in the area: the Cadurques or Cadurci. If you want to locate it on a map, this town is situated some 100-km north from Toulouse and 200-km east from Bordeaux. Cahors is famous for its wine (though I doubt it is known in the US), but I'm not sure if the vineyards existed as early as the 4th century BC. Anyway, it is a beautiful region and I just wanted Willen to know that I hope he'll come and say a quick "hello"... Best wishes for the rest of his trip!

P.S.: if you ever need some English-French translation, I'll be pleased to help you.

Reviewer: MiaRoseDate: 2005-02-04
Reviewid: 112986Chapter: 4
Hi Again! I was so glad when I saw youu on the updates list. This is another great chapter. I esspecially enjoyed the way you had Willin name some of the things we hear about in the HP universe, and even just in life, such as "spells." The invention of the plow was a very good idea, and shows how much you have researched for this story. You are very skilled at weaving together history and fantasy to create a wonderful story.

And congratulations on becoming a Professor! I'm glad I could help!

Reviewer: NaazjuDate: 2005-02-04
Reviewid: 112981Chapter: 4
The story seemed a bit more 'jumpy' to me...with reflections and different time periods showing up. By chance have you read Beauty by Robin McKinley? This chapter is written in a very similar style.
The only thing I can say I'm truly upset about is that this was not the end of the story (although, secretly, I'm glad to hear there will be at least two more chapters to look forward to).
I think the historical notes at the end of the chapter are a great idea. I often wonder what is true and what is fiction in the stories I read, so I am grateful and glad you are choosing to share both with us.
Well written, keep up the good work, and please post soon!

Reviewer: joew111Date: 2005-02-04
Reviewid: 112969Chapter: 2
Excellent story. Well written and compelling.

Reviewer: EntiDate: 2005-02-04
Reviewid: 112961Chapter: 4
Ow... it's not finished yet... :(
I really enjoyed reading the story so far, the characters are very alive and I like all the history, too!
Em.. I don't know if I've got anything to say to improve it.. Maybe while waiting for the next chapter I'll read it again and see if I find something ;)
I really like Ollivander, too (in the books already), and the scenes here are really good. In your first chapter Harry comes to the conclusion that he is actually quite nice, which I discovered a long time ago too ;)
Well.. I'll leave you to write then.. ;)

(ps: sorry for all the smilies.. I seem to remember you mentioned not liking them..)

Reviewer: FranDate: 2005-01-25
Reviewid: 112041Chapter: 3
Just discovered you've updated, thanks, it makes a refreshing change to the Harry/Hermione/Ginny fluff I've been reading. I had to do a reality check when I'd finished, for a moment it seemed like I was reading a real history book. I love the way you blend fact and fiction and fictional fact, like Celtiberians being from Iberia/Spain and what I assume is the origin of Diagon Alley. Just one thing confuses me though; if they had no written language and the new one is 'latin' what are the ancient runes that they study at Hogwarts? I also like the Willen/Porto and Harry/Voldemorte hint. Speedy with the next update please!

Reviewer: MiaRoseDate: 2005-01-17
Reviewid: 111211Chapter: 3
I am really enjoying this story, I have actually wondered about Ollivander's past also- I am a history fan myself, and I noticed how early the founding date for Ollivander's is. You are doing a really wonderful job with this, and fully deserve to be on the Proffessor's shelf IMO.

I hope you are a regular updater.I don't like long waits for stories : ).

Reviewer: catakitDate: 2005-01-17
Reviewid: 111184Chapter: 3
applause
applauseapplas
applauseapplause
applause applause
applause applause
applause applause
applause appluase
applauseapplause
applause

PS, very bad pun.

Reviewer: CootiePatootieDate: 2005-01-16
Reviewid: 111113Chapter: 3
What a great story. I just found it and read all three chapters in a go. You have a great storytelling gift.
I am glad you are omitting the inventory. My sanity would not survive!!
The historical aspect of this story is amazing. You have made me feel as though I am truly listening to an accurate recounting of historical events.
Thanks, and keep writing!!

Reviewer: NunduDate: 2005-01-16
Reviewid: 111051Chapter: 2
Ah yes, a history major. I have found those who love history make the best story tellers. This is a riveting tale that I am throughly enjoying.

Reviewer: seamusisevilDate: 2005-01-16
Reviewid: 111037Chapter: 3
well another wonderful chapter and i will try to take your advice on patience but no promices there so please hurry with the next chapter before i explode with anticpitation

Reviewer: NataliaDate: 2005-01-06
Reviewid: 109989Chapter: 2
I am glad I stumbled across your stories. I was captivated almost from the beginning of chapter 1 and really enjoyed learning your side of how wizard history came about. I also love your incorporation of 'old language' into your stories ('three moons time" and others...) I can't wait for your next chapter.

Reviewer: Aaran St VinesDate: 2005-01-06
Reviewid: 109957Chapter: 1
Birgit's observation about whether the Unforgivable Curses were around in the Fourth Century BC is logical. It will not be explained out until Chapters Three and Four "how" and "why" the Unforgivable Curses were there at his time. Battling the type of magic that would produce the Unforgivable Curses is a major theme of this tale.

Thanks, Birgit, for this observation and the others. I do hope to improve my writing skills with fanfic and your comments will help.

To others, if you have not read Birgit's work I recommend it highly.

Reviewer: BirgitDate: 2005-01-06
Reviewid: 109943Chapter: 1
I promised you to read and review this a very long time ago. I'm sorry for being so terribly late. I'm also sorry to say that history tales usually don't interest me much and this one is no exception. That has nothing to do with your writing skills, because the story is well-written enough. It's just that I don't like this genre.

However, I promised you a review for the first chapter, so here we go. I'm amazed by the amount of research you must have done to write this. You did a really good job on setting this in an ancient world. I'm just not too sure that the Unforgivable Curses already existed in that time -- I would have expected the magic to be different, less perfectioned, maybe -- but there's nothing in canon against it; it's just my silly opinion.

I also like the setting of this story. I love Harry being *so* bored with doing homework that he's willing to do dull work for Ollivander instead. Luckily for him, Ollivander is a good story-teller. :-)

I think that the start of the chapter might have flowed slightly better if you had made everything happen at that moment instead of using a lot of "had"'s to describe things that had already happened, but it's not really important. Besides, your own writing voice seems suited very much for story-telling rather than making the story happen right now. If that makes any sense to you. Perhaps you're really good at writing action scenes as well, but in this chapter you show that other quality.

My favourite line:

>>There was only so much homework he could force himself to do by himself before school even started.<<

So typical Harry!

Reviewer: catakitDate: 2004-12-23
Reviewid: 108328Chapter: 2
I like it, I really do, I've just been spoiled for a great part of my reading with stories that have already been finished, so now here I am under forced rationing. If you can manage to do so by your own free will, you have more self control than me.

Reviewer: CattailDate: 2004-12-22
Reviewid: 108315Chapter: 2
I find this story absorbing and fun. I like the historical aspect of it and discoving how magical "technology" was discovered and fine tuned. Willen is endearing and likeable, you really want to root for him and find out what is going to happen next. Willen's luck is sometimes a little hard to keep up with but it is a theme that becomes easy to follow the more I read. I am already ansty to find out the entire history of this community and how the magical and non magical communities finally separated! You have a lot of writing to do!

thanks for adding to this wonderful world of fan fiction!

Reviewer: Mrs's_Norris's_MouseDate: 2004-12-20
Reviewid: 108199Chapter: 2
I plan to continue to read your stories as they appear, thank you.

Reviewer: SarahDate: 2004-12-17
Reviewid: 107972Chapter: 1
This is a fabulous piece. I caught myself watching TV and getting bored, and this was the first thing to roll into my mind, that rarely happens with fanfic. Good job! Keep it up, I really enjoy this time era in real history, so this is a nice treat.

Reviewer: seamusisevilDate: 2004-12-17
Reviewid: 107963Chapter: 2
wow another great chapter keep-em coming cant wait foe next up-date

Reviewer: PenelopeAntwerpDate: 2004-12-16
Reviewid: 107934Chapter: 2
I really like this story. I seem to be attracted by wizarding history - not necessarily recent either. Great ideas. Keep it up.

-penny

Reviewer: PlancksDate: 2004-12-16
Reviewid: 107932Chapter: 2
wow! great story! the coolest thing though is the "Touch" thing. it sounds so... perfect. so...hum... you know... how stg that really must be. I dunno...
and the idea of the wand being an object to concentrate and "direct" the "touch" is also very nice! and poeple with theirs own types of "touch"... gosh! itīs so rpg!

Reviewer: PatriciaDate: 2004-12-16
Reviewid: 107882Chapter: 2
I am so very much enjoying this tale! And I agree with you about Ozma's stories.
:)

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2004-12-15
Reviewid: 107829Chapter: 2
I like your Willen's Luck. I found this chapter much more enjoyable than the previous as you were able to get Willen on his way.

Stellan hoped he could still make his theft and get away with it.
-What a nice guy. Hope you can get him back in the story.

Reviewer: well wisherDate: 2004-11-22
Reviewid: 105568Chapter: 1
i really enjoyed this! not only was the material completely new but i love the way you write. am i right in guessing u wld be older than many sugar quillers - your style is just very mature, and i love the way the underdog/ orphan theme comes full cirlce. please update it soon.

Reviewer: dillyDate: 2004-11-22
Reviewid: 105567Chapter: 1
arrrgghhhh........u have to update. pretty please?? i love this story, i can hardly wait for the rest. keep writing, please!

Reviewer: JenDate: 2004-11-18
Reviewid: 105153Chapter: 1
Oh, what an original idea! I really like this story. You're grammar is very good and the plot is already very catching. It's not your typical Potter read and I like that. I can't wait to catch an update so I know what happens to Willen!

Reviewer: Mrs's_Norris's_MouseDate: 2004-11-15
Reviewid: 104884Chapter: 1
Well done a good start and I like to see variety in our subject.

Reviewer: beckDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104579Chapter: 1
wonderful story cant wait for your update i would love to find out what happens to willen =)

Reviewer: McGonagll's CatDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104546Chapter: 1
This is fun! There seem a few anachronisms, but I really enjoyed reading it. More soon please.

Reviewer: seamusisevilDate: 2004-11-12
Reviewid: 104538Chapter: 1
wow!!!! what a really good story im hooked already please update soon

Reviewer: Norwegian BlueDate: 2004-11-11
Reviewid: 104342Chapter: 1
Very interesting story. Not one that a lot of people would see the potential in. Ollivanders would have had an interesting past, but many people would not pay attention to that. Anyway, very good, has a lot of potential. And I'm glad you didn't have Ollivander keep up with the inventory the whole time. Or else I would have walked off, and I wouldn't have read this.

Reviewer: IncognitoDate: 2004-11-11
Reviewid: 104279Chapter: 1
this is a good start at an explaination. I think you should have Harry interupt Mr. Olivander occasionally though, make it seem more like he's telling the story, not like we are reading it. After he started talking it seemed as though you kind of forgot about Harry. Keep it up.

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