The Sugar Quill
Sugar Quill Community
- S.P.E.W (SQ History)

Fan Fiction and Writing
- Ask Madam Pince
(Story Submissions)
- Floo Network (Links)

Forums

Administrative Links

Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: A Real Relationship
Review(s): 46

Reviewer: Joy-Marie DavisDate: 2008-04-03
Reviewid: 150722Chapter: 1
Hi! What a great story! I really like it. It's fab!

Reviewer: Shina LarisDate: 2007-01-10
Reviewid: 146820Chapter: 1
This is absolutely brilliant. I couldn't help but love James to death after reading this (of course, not that I didn't already love him before, but...).

Reviewer: EmerikaDate: 2006-07-02
Reviewid: 143905Chapter: 1
Hey! MY name is Jessica! Haha. Thats cool. I feel special.

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-02-28
Reviewid: 140360Chapter: 1
Excellent – My regular: Choose both.

Reviewer: HorseloverPennyDate: 2006-01-21
Reviewid: 138759Chapter: 1
“Allow me,” said Sirius, leaning close to James. “Naked Snape,” he said.


haha That was perfect!! good story.

Reviewer: TemeraireDate: 2005-11-03
Reviewid: 135666Chapter: 1
Love the Jessica "Lapin" throwaway. I suppose she'll meet an animagi named Roger?

Reviewer: KateDate: 2005-10-17
Reviewid: 134636Chapter: 1
Good God. I think you are the most awesomest person in the world. All your story things are so funny...

Reviewer: KaitlynDate: 2005-10-02
Reviewid: 133578Chapter: 1
I love your stories and your writing style. You make all your characters so real. It's increbible. And I really like how you end all your stories. You don't bother with unnessiscary details. I love how your stories are just snipbits of life and that's it. Keep writing!

Reviewer: Alya1989262Date: 2005-10-01
Reviewid: 133531Chapter: 1
Hi! Came here by way of traceria on LJ, who was pimping you on thegreatbreak.
I really like your style of writing; you have a wicked sense of humour. Catchy piece (I think I'm going to read more stories of yours).
Your Sirius sounds a bit cliched to me, however. I must say that OMFGHyper!Sirius annoys the shit out of me. Otherwise, your characterisations are pretty good.
But your style is vairy catchy ;)
~Alya~
www.livejournal.com/~alya1989262

Reviewer: Genne-veraDate: 2005-09-05
Reviewid: 131758Chapter: 1
LoL! lover the Hairy potter look thing!

Reviewer: GreenMeansGoDate: 2005-07-31
Reviewid: 128327Chapter: 1
That was adorable. "I what?" lol.

Reviewer: rarereviewerDate: 2005-06-11
Reviewid: 123741Chapter: 1
Just when I thought I couldn't love you more Jack, you go and quote HomestarRunner. *Deep sigh* But you're probably married, or gay or (my probably more accurate theory) JKR in 'web-disguise.' Well until your next brilliant turnout- thanks.

Reviewer: BrittneyDate: 2005-05-22
Reviewid: 122585Chapter: 1
I'm going to read all your fics. Really, I am. Because then I'll never stop laughing and I'll have to go to the hospital, and they'd have to being my laptop, which wouldn't work because my laptop sucks. And then I'll die laughing. So, if I die, I'm blaming you. But it's a good blame.

I must say one thing before a begin laughing again. Peter is perfect. There are few who can do a perfect Peter; in the way I think of him, at least. :)

I'm laughing again. :)

Brittney

Reviewer: Fresh_AngelBabeDate: 2005-04-17
Reviewid: 119829Chapter: 1
Brilliantly done!

Reviewer: Darker_RageDate: 2005-04-12
Reviewid: 119320Chapter: 1
HAd me in stitches, absolutely fantastic. Carefully placing the Male Mind onto paper, you've created .... this .... I do have to wonder what JK would say if she ever read your parodies though...

Reviewer: RosieDate: 2005-03-11
Reviewid: 116197Chapter: 1
Has it ever occured to you that you could be the reincarnation/pre of Douglas Adams, "Since I was born before JK Rowling died, I am presumably not her reincarnation. However, I could be the preincarnation of one of her descendants, and therefore, in that sense, I do own Harry Potter." Your stories have made me laugh like nothing else has since I read about the talking cow that wants to be eaten. I have just picked myself of the floor where I was rolling with laughter. Pure genius.

Reviewer: Angelina WeasleyDate: 2005-01-21
Reviewid: 111697Chapter: 1
Second review of this story I've written, I'd think.
Anyway.
"You what?" exclaimed Lily.
"I what?" exclaimed James.
"Potter! Evans! Out!"
Jack, you are , in fact, a beast. Usually, that's what I use to complement myself, but, y'know... Plus, Homestar is the epitime (huh?) of Beastiness. Heh.
Oh yeah! I've been meaning to ask, but I've been to busy reading your other stories. Why is it that you capitilize 'Hell'?
Oh, wait. It's because it's a Proper Noun, right?
Lobe,
Angie.
P.S- I win at life.

Reviewer: louisaDate: 2005-01-16
Reviewid: 111076Chapter: 1
As I have come to expect from you, a hugely enjoyable chuckle-fest, yay! Your murauders rock.
I see a sequel where your bunny girl gets remus, you know, Lupin, Lapin ... could get intresting at transformation time... She'd have to be like that monty python bunny to last a night of passion under the full moon with our favorite werewolf.

Reviewer: Mystic (Claire)Date: 2005-01-15
Reviewid: 110993Chapter: 1
*Could literally just die. Note, literally. Heck, everyone dies...*
Wow. Everytime I read something by you, the happiness allows me to hold off eating something sweet that my body thanks me for later. Now, not only was this hilarious, but it involved MWPP. Not only did it involove MWPP, but it was hilarious. You could write something without puctuation or any grammatical structure and I would never question you. I'm coming off oddly now, so I'll cut this review with:
“Come on, it’ll be fun!” insisted Sirius. “We’ll put little symbols and decals on his forehead. Like a lightning bolt or something, right by his hairline. I tell you, everyone will want the Hairy Potter look.”

Long live the ultimate pun.

Reviewer: Tejano CeylonDate: 2004-12-12
Reviewid: 107626Chapter: 1
Hee! There were so many little clever things, especially the Marauders scenes. I was giggling or downright laughing through most of this.

“We’ll put little symbols and decals on his forehead. Like a lightning bolt or something, right by his hairline. I tell you, everyone will want the Hairy Potter look.”

Clever!

Reviewer: Amiable DorsaiDate: 2004-12-09
Reviewid: 107384Chapter: 1
“Sirius, no. Don’t make me hit you will a rolled up newspaper.”

Snicker.

Reviewer: Pineapple QueenDate: 2004-12-08
Reviewid: 107142Chapter: 1
HomestarRunner is hilarious. And so are you, as a matter of fact. In fact, you may be one of the funniest people I've ever met in fandom.

"“I win at life,” said Sirius smugly."

I love this.

"However, I could be the preincarnation of one of her descendants, and therefore, in that sense, I do own Harry Potter. But in another, more legal sense, no, no I don’t."

And this.

"His lips began to form the words, “I want to break up,” and he spoke. “I love you,” he said.
“You what?” exclaimed Lily.
“I what?” exclaimed James."

And this. You are a truly talented writer. *fluffs up head* Yay for Lily/James fluff!

-PQ

Reviewer: TrulyDate: 2004-12-04
Reviewid: 106841Chapter: 1
oh jack. again? it's always a good day when your name is on the update list :)

james is such a cutie. awwwww he said the words. and better, he said them accidentally! awwww.

jack - i love your stories.

Reviewer: WendelinDate: 2004-12-03
Reviewid: 106777Chapter: 1
'Lily smiled. “Want to know something odd? Despite knowing full well what you’re like, and that you’re probably going to be doing something completely idiotic within the hour, I think I love you too.” '

She doesn't know the half of it, the poor girl. I have this hilarious mental video of the both of them, right after their kiss outside the library:

"Er... so. Lily. I think we should break up."

*Sputter*

"Oi, don't hex me! I was going to tell you right away in the library but I got sidetracked!"


What a piece of work, Jack. All hail.

My fav lines, for some reason, are Lupin's. "We aren't going to draw on him, you nutcase."

I don't know what's extra funny about it, but I laughed *so* hard when that came along. Then, of course, you just finished me off with the 'Hairy Potter' line.

Good going, mate.

Reviewer: TraceyDate: 2004-12-03
Reviewid: 106748Chapter: 1
A very entertaining and thoroughly enjoyable piece! Sounds like some critic's comment on a movie.

Anyway, I really liked it. And for some reason, I got a big kick out of the line: Lily smiled. “Want to know something odd? Despite knowing full well what you’re like, and that you’re probably going to be doing something completely idiotic within the hour, I think I love you too.”

Thanks!

Reviewer: Angelina WeasleyDate: 2004-12-02
Reviewid: 106704Chapter: 1
yo, Jack. I'm back.Here's a little song for you:
Guess who's back back back
Back again gain gain
Angie's back back back
Til the end (guess who's back guess who's back guess who's back ETC.)
ANYway, this story twas excelente. As always. I'm zealous. And Jealous.
AW

Reviewer: AmandaDate: 2004-12-02
Reviewid: 106697Chapter: 1
It still amazes me how you can keep me laughing and laughing with something just as simple as a sentence! You really do amaze me Jack.
Insquequo terminus,
amanda

Reviewer: SreyaDate: 2004-12-02
Reviewid: 106683Chapter: 1
*laughing* While your summary made me expect something longer, I do have to say I enjoyed this. Particularly all of the imagery you used. You certainly have a talent for interesting phrases! :~D

Reviewer: ellaDate: 2004-12-02
Reviewid: 106661Chapter: 1
Anyone who can think of the following definitely is the next Shakespeare, Einstein, whoever-they-call-a-genius:

1. “Wonder what’s wrong with him,” said Sirius. He prodded his friend in the cheek. “Let’s draw on him!” he suddenly exclaimed. “Who has a quill?”

“We aren’t going to draw on him, you mental case,” said Remus.

“Come on, it’ll be fun!” insisted Sirius. “We’ll put little symbols and decals on his forehead. Like a lightning bolt or something, right by his hairline. I tell you, everyone will want the Hairy Potter look.”


2. “Allow me,” said Sirius, leaning close to James. “Naked Snape,” he said.

“Gah!” said James. “That was uncalled for!” He shuddered, and then sneered. Then the sneering made him think of Snape, which made him shudder again.

“I win at life,” said Sirius smugly.

GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! HA-- ha.. ha.. *eherm* Heh. Therefore, I like you Jack. I think I'll go stalk you now. *continues laughing her ass off*

Reviewer: LilacDate: 2004-12-02
Reviewid: 106651Chapter: 1
"Trogdooooooooooor!"

Oh, um...sorry. Flashbacks from Homestarrunner.com. :D

This is cute and sweet, and very true to the male...ah... perspective. :D

Reviewer: stefanieDate: 2004-12-02
Reviewid: 106638Chapter: 1
super cute.

Reviewer: SueDate: 2004-12-02
Reviewid: 106612Chapter: 1
I really enjoy reading your stuff, against my better judgment. You have a great sense of humor. Your writing style is straightforward and simple. Dagnabbit. When I grow up, I want to write sort of like you.

Reviewer: Talking Purple RabbitsDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106605Chapter: 1
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

more coherant review later, hopefully, when i can breathe....

jack, you've done it again, my boy. excellent disclaimers and notes!

Reviewer: MeredithDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106584Chapter: 1
As far as I'm concerned you are the bestwriter on this site.....

You seem to understand the teenage boy inside and out. Keep writin'

Reviewer: SydneyDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106567Chapter: 1
I want to thank you for this fic. I mean it. I was completely bummed before I read it, and, right now, after laughing my head off at every other line of this lovely one-shot ("Sirius! Put the quill down!" *wipes away tears of laughter*), I feel a LOT better. I'm going to go read it again.

Reviewer: moonetteDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106541Chapter: 1
I have just discovered your work recently and am so glad I did. Harry Potter fan fiction does not always lighten one's mood, given all the angst, final battles, etc. But apparently we can always count on you to make us laugh. I had a smile the entire way through this one, and did laugh out loud 2 times - the Snape/sneering and the You what?/I what? lines. Well done! You have that quick, unexpected wit, not unlike Dave Barry, but a bit less crazy. Looking forward to more.

Reviewer: lossenrhosDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106538Chapter: 1
You had me worried there for a minute. Nice ending though. James Potter is almost as clueless as Ron.
<“I love you,” he said.

“You what?” exclaimed Lily.

“I what?” exclaimed James.>
You crack me up. Gorgeous line!

<“We’ll put little symbols and decals on his forehead. Like a lightning bolt or something, right by his hairline. I tell you, everyone will want the Hairy Potter look.”>

Indeed. Pity JKR stole your idea, huh, Sirius? *remembers Sirius is a fictional character* Er, Jack?

<“Allow me,” said Sirius, leaning close to James. “Naked Snape,” he said.>
Well, I know some people who wouldn't object.....

This is hilarious. Keep writing (and that's not a request)

Reviewer: Deborah PetersDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106536Chapter: 1
Mr Ichijouji, what you have written is pure, honest-to-Whomever fluff. Adorable and amusing, good sir. The climax was especially well-crafted.

Reviewer: GiesbrechtDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106528Chapter: 1
Wonderful, silly, fun, as usual. Love it.

Reviewer: JenniferDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106500Chapter: 1
wow. you are an incredibly witty writer. your stories all make me smile and lol. i can't believe i didn't discover your stories before now.

anyway, this one was very sweet, funny, and cute. i like the lightning bolt and "hairy potter" jokes - very prophetic, and altho some might think those jokes were cliched and overdone, i liked the foreshadowing. i loved the whole conversation about lily.. very funnny, and i can totally see the marauders saying those things. "naked snape" - brilliant! and i can't believe i would ever find an attempted break-up to be hilarious and sweet, but this one was awesome. even james can't defy fate. :)

Reviewer: GenesseDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106495Chapter: 1
NAKED SNAPE?!?!?! Jack, I might have to stop reading your stories if you're going to throw something like that in it.

Okay, I was just kidding about that.

<<"I haven’t been anyone’s boyfriend since we were six and your cousin made us play house.” Remus and Peter quietly filed that under Things to Mock James and Sirius About Later >>

Hahahaha! I was sitting at my computer laughing at that when my dad walked by and asked what was so funny. I couldn't explain. How does one explain? I just shrugged and he walked away.

Reviewer: CathyDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106480Chapter: 1
You are definitely an extremely witty person. Thanks for the laugh :)

Reviewer: Purple Eyed WeasleyDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106452Chapter: 1
That was so cute. Really well done. i liked it a lot.

Reviewer: CoquillageDate: 2004-12-01
Reviewid: 106447Chapter: 1
Jack, I just love knowing I can click on your stuff and just laugh out loud. But it's more than that. Sure it's terribly clever and witty and invents all sorts of new language and puts readers in danger of snorting something different out of their nose every time they read - but it's real. Underneath it all, it's real, and that makes it perfect.

Reviewer: StarseaDate: 2004-11-30
Reviewid: 106402Chapter: 1
I like this. It's sweet, but it's not too sickening. I like James's little moment of 'where is the life that late I led', I LOVE the interaction between the boys, and your little note about the epilogue. XD

Favourite Lines:
“Allow me,” said Sirius, leaning close to James. “Naked Snape,” he said.

“Gah!” said James. “That was uncalled for!” He shuddered, and then sneered. Then the sneering made him think of Snape, which made him shudder again.

“Padfoot, shut up,” said Remus effortlessly, as if he said it so often that the default position of his lips and tongue had moved in order to accommodate it. (Definitely shows how close they are by now.)

Remus and Peter quietly filed that under "Things to Mock James and Sirius About Later" as James continued. (*snigger snigger*)

There was a moment of silence as the three waded through James’ circular logic into the Sea of Knowing What the Hell He Was Talking About. (I've had to wade into that sea many times... *nods*)

xxx~Starsea~xxx

Reviewer: RaeDate: 2004-11-30
Reviewid: 106387Chapter: 1
Oh My GOD, I think that may have been your funniest yet. Best bit for me?

“We aren’t going to draw on him, you mental case,” said Remus.




“Come on, it’ll be fun!” insisted Sirius. “We’ll put little symbols and decals on his forehead. Like a lightning bolt or something, right by his hairline. I tell you, everyone will want the Hairy Potter look.”


I almost CHOKED.

This was a very good insight into what I've always experienced the male psyche to be like lol. Excellent

The Sugar Quill was created by Zsenya and Arabella. For questions, please send us an Owl!

-- Powered by SQ3 : Coded by David : Design by James --