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Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 8

Reviewer: NARDate: 2005-03-17
Reviewid: 116830Chapter: 1
A cute little story, I liked it.

Reviewer: Norwegian BlueDate: 2005-03-15
Reviewid: 116652Chapter: 1
Except for a few *minor* errors, about which I really can't talk, this was pretty good. Ginny was in character, and you had a good ending. I'm assuming this is a one-shot, but it seems like it would be more part of a chapter story, but that's not a big deal. The only problem I had was that when Remus spoke, it seemed a bit choppy. I don't know how to explain it. Sort of like he wasn't a native English speaker. If it's the case that you aren't a native English speaker, my hat is off to you, because except for Remus's bits, I wouldn't have been able to tell. If you are a native English speaker, you might want to say the sentances out loud before you write them down to see if they sound right.

Reviewer: WendelinDate: 2005-03-15
Reviewid: 116645Chapter: 1
Made a mistake in my review... this is not your first story on the Quill! :s I feel like an idiot. Sorry!

Reviewer: WendelinDate: 2005-03-15
Reviewid: 116644Chapter: 1
What a great first story to put on SQ!

You have a knack for handling scenes with a lot of characters in them... that's always been my problem area, and I'm admiring the way you manage to capture the dynamic of a big-group interaction so easily. (Well, it seems effortless here, at least. No doubt, it was much harder to write.)

I'm looking forward to reading more of your work. Come back soon with a new story!

Reviewer: Reader2Date: 2005-03-15
Reviewid: 116640Chapter: 1
Nice little fic. Ginny Rox.

Reviewer: NunduDate: 2005-03-15
Reviewid: 116628Chapter: 1
Cute little story, but could stand for a bit more tweaking. A couple of problems a homonym (used 'brake' instead of 'break'), and a most common error ('loose breakfast' instead of 'lose breakfast'). Overall not a bad first time fiction. I found the present tense a bit distracting. It is very difficult to pull off properly. Also, may I recommend a space between each paragraph, rather than an indentation? It just looks nicer on the screen. Just my two knuts! :D

Reviewer: Emma W.Date: 2005-03-15
Reviewid: 116624Chapter: 1
Completely OOC.

Reviewer: FarieDate: 2005-03-15
Reviewid: 116617Chapter: 1
This was very cute! I liked them getting the elf heads off the wall, that bugged me. The end paragraph paints a really nice picture of a holiday beginning. Hope they don't work TOO hard!

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