The Sugar Quill
Sugar Quill Community
- S.P.E.W (SQ History)

Fan Fiction and Writing
- Ask Madam Pince
(Story Submissions)
- Floo Network (Links)

Forums

Administrative Links

Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 16

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-08-18
Reviewid: 144863Chapter: 4
I'm sure you must be aware of those minor error - nmaes, sports, etc.
My question is: Where is the next installment. Or is this already abandoned?

Reviewer: Sapphire NoirDate: 2006-05-30
Reviewid: 143127Chapter: 4
I read your first two chapters at Christmas and then forgot the title so I couldn't go back and check when you posted new chapters. I was delighted to find you again as I have enjoyed your work so much.To reiterate what others have said it is very canonish, a blessing in these betwixt JKR book times, and I particularly like the way you move about the magical world. I must disagree with you about Snape though, to me it was clear that the argument that he had with Dumbledore on the edge of the Forbidden forest was Dumbledore insisting he kill him to protect Draco from becomming a murderer, as their purpose as teachers is to protect the students, and once Draco kills his soul is lost, this way he has a chance of redemption. Anyway, looking forward to the next chapter with anticipation, please put me out of my misery.

Reviewer: GliffyDate: 2006-05-15
Reviewid: 142830Chapter: 4
Okay, so I just reviewed after chapter 2 but, I couldn't help myself, I really liket this story. It goes into detail, but the plot and character interaction is bogged down by it.
Sorry to repeat but I must say Bravo!

Reviewer: GliffyDate: 2006-05-15
Reviewid: 142822Chapter: 2
I'm not usually a big fan of horcrux hunt fics but I really like this one.
The alternate PoVs make it different, a nice change.
I applaude your work, Dark Princess, Bravo!

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-05-15
Reviewid: 142817Chapter: 4
I think I'll keep reading if you keep writing. Fair enough?

Reviewer: osnoflaDate: 2006-02-13
Reviewid: 139808Chapter: 3
I'm really enjoying this one a lot, I like the way you think and write, perhaps a little dark that chapter about Azkaban, but I'm sure that's the path JKR will most likely follow on book VII.
Keep the chapters coming.

Reviewer: DalfDate: 2006-01-17
Reviewid: 138638Chapter: 3
You have Dudley wrestling when he actually boxes, and I think you might have ment Roger Davies not Sean Davis for the Hogwarts student.

Otherwise a good chapter.

Reviewer: FordPrefectDate: 2006-01-15
Reviewid: 138554Chapter: 3
This is very surprisingly canon-like. Not so much in content but in writing style. I am looking forward to the next installment.

Reviewer: AminDate: 2006-01-14
Reviewid: 138520Chapter: 3
There is only one way to describe your chapters "supercalafrigalisticexpealadocious" i dont knw how to spell it lol...this is brilliant. A great piece of work that must have taken you awhile to perfect in such a brilliant way. Description is very good and story line is great. When i read this its nearly the same as reading chapters from JK Rowlings book. The style and structure is good. Some of the things they say needs working on. More realism in the words needs adding.

CONCLUSION:
A great piece of work that i think no once can mock in anyway.

Reviewer: BirgitDate: 2006-01-14
Reviewid: 138511Chapter: 3
Nice chapter. Especially the Dursleys were spot-on. And Harry seems the end-of-HBP Harry as well. I'm not surprised that he's dreaming of dead Ginnys, though I feel sorry for him. Everything about this story has a very canonish feel. Good job!

Reviewer: BirgitDate: 2006-01-14
Reviewid: 138510Chapter: 2
Another great chapter. Once again, everyone is quite in character, including Bellatrix, whom you wrote just as twisted as she really is. Poor Aurors. Are any of them going to get out of there alive? I suppose not.

You write very well, with lots of description, but there's one thing I think you can improve: write actions more chronologically. You tend to say a lot of things in advance, like "On the first day of July, the darkness would strike. It would strike hard, and it would win." That's not a bad thing; it makes the story more fascinating and the readers are more inclined to read on to find out what happened. But I think you do it a little too often.

A similar things, on a somewhat smaller scale: "Blackness crept upon her vision, but she did not slip into unconsciousness before she felt Lucius backhand her again, this time even harder than before." It's fine to write a sentence like that: it makes sure that the reader isn't going to be bored. He can (and does) translate it in his own mind to "Lucius backhands her -- then she slips into unconsciousness". Unfortunately, there's more coming after this sentence before she finally becomes unconscious. It's confusing that this paragraph is so un-chronologically.

I hope that makes sense to you. Anyway, interesting story, and I'm looking forward to reading about what will happen next.

Reviewer: BirgitDate: 2006-01-14
Reviewid: 138509Chapter: 1
This is pretty good! Your summary is a bit long-winded, which may be why you haven't got very many reviews yet, but the story itself is well-written and very interesting. So far, all characters seem to be in-character -- if you believe in evil!Snape, of course.

I'm off to read the next chapter.

Reviewer: MrRobertsIIIDate: 2005-12-13
Reviewid: 137110Chapter: 2
Good start. I could just picture Lucius after a year in Az. Having one four aurors made sense I thought you developed them very well in a very short amount of time. Looks like your are taking the Evil!Snape route, though I hope you surprise us.

Reviewer: dalfDate: 2005-12-13
Reviewid: 137106Chapter: 2
I really like the narative style of this. Not sure why Voldemort did not just kill all the guards at Azkaban though. Intresting.

Reviewer: DalfDate: 2005-12-13
Reviewid: 137105Chapter: 1
Though I am 99% (make that 95 ... no 70 ... ok 52%) sure that in cannon we will find that Snape is not evil. I *AM* a confirmed Snape hater and so this fic brings me much delight in the "it might not be how it pans out eventually but it does seem plausable" department.

Well written the internal workings of their minds and all. The forthcomming Ginny Kidnapping needs to be handeled with care. Kidnappings are too easy a plot device and are frequently used in place of real plot devlopment, which would be a shame.

Reviewer: rhibreDate: 2005-11-28
Reviewid: 136403Chapter: 1
This is a very good start. I like it being from Snapes EVIL PoV.

The Sugar Quill was created by Zsenya and Arabella. For questions, please send us an Owl!

-- Powered by SQ3 : Coded by David : Design by James --