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Review(s): 11
| Reviewer: lucyjuce_27 | Date: 2006-08-30 |
| Reviewid: 145080 | Chapter: 1 |
| I love this chapter! It's been written really well, fitting in with what JK says but having the bystanders aswell. Well done, are you planning on doing another chapter? 8/10 Lucy x |
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| Reviewer: liposcelis | Date: 2006-02-22 |
| Reviewid: 140158 | Chapter: 1 |
| Nice job with the alternate PoV- I think the details you've added about Lily and her friends are right on target. |
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| Reviewer: Reader 2 | Date: 2006-02-18 |
| Reviewid: 139996 | Chapter: 1 |
| I am not sure if I posted for this already. However, it is good enough that there is no harm in posting twice. |
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| Reviewer: mary ellis | Date: 2006-02-04 |
| Reviewid: 139315 | Chapter: 1 |
This is well-written and I like that you give Lly's friends names that are mostly in canon. And their witty banter is satisfying, not the usual giggly stuff of Marauder tales. And you only have one of them drooling over Sirius. And I like the comments of on-lookers at the end.
You have all the dialog from the book right too. But that's a bit of a problem for me. Even though this is from Lily's POV rather than Harry's, I don't get much more information from it than I did from the book. We all know that Lily despises James from the dialog itself. I think her thoughts need to reveal something new about her for this piece to rise above the usual ho-hum Marauder rehashes. |
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| Reviewer: amelia | Date: 2006-02-04 |
| Reviewid: 139301 | Chapter: 1 |
| a really lovely story from Lilys point of view! i liked it; please, write somemore soon! |
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| Reviewer: tta | Date: 2006-02-03 |
| Reviewid: 139268 | Chapter: 1 |
Very nice! I especially liked the ending!
I would have liked to see maybe a bit more of Lily's thoughts and a little varation, because it was rather one-on-one with canon. This story is from Lily's point of view, not Harry's from Snape's memory.
Still, I really liked it and I'd love to read more L/J work by you. |
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| Reviewer: Aldawen | Date: 2006-02-02 |
| Reviewid: 139226 | Chapter: 1 |
| I really love your interpretation of my favorite HP chapter from Lily's point of view. Your use of previously mentioned characters as most of Lily's friends is lovely; it makes the story seem more in line with canon. Good work! |
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| Reviewer: Zia Montrose | Date: 2006-02-02 |
| Reviewid: 139220 | Chapter: 1 |
| One of my favorite HP passages... I like what you interspersed here. Will you follow it up with more? I am hoping JK satisfies my curiosity for how Lily fell for James. In the meantime, I search my own mind and others' (plausible) fanfiction for ideas. For my part, I'm inclined to think he was always inherently good, but with lots of teenage immaturities to shed. I appreciated your clever dialogue that agrees with my own mental picture of Lily: "You were staring at him like he had all the answers to the paper written on the back of his head!" I think you could do justice to an original theme of this nature. Will you write more? |
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| Reviewer: AmandaB | Date: 2006-02-01 |
| Reviewid: 139193 | Chapter: 1 |
| I've always liked that scene, because it probably is not the only time that Black, Potter and Snape got into a unprovoked duel, and goes far to explain the hatred between them. But I like Lily's response, even if Snape is very rude to her. I wonder what changed her mind about James? Did he mature because of the prank in 6th year? |
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