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Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 11

Reviewer: outofthecupboardDate: 2006-03-15
Reviewid: 140969Chapter: 1
This story makes me think about the years Peter Pettigrew spent playing a servant-like and flattering role to the other three Marauders. In this story, as in the books, Peter is accepted as a friend, such as when he whistfully mentions the end of their time at Hogwarts and Sirius tells him his home is open to him any time, and at the same time he is ridiculed, and by his downtrodden, passive personality he allows himself to be picked on. He prepared wine to serve his friends and volunteered to fit the vinyls back in their sleeves, but his firends criticized him. Perhaps there was a build up of comments from his friends and simmering feelings of revenge that drove Peter Pettigrew to side with Voldemort, or perhaps there is some other pathology going on that I don't recognize. I wonder what motivates him to stay friends with them for so long, and what do the Marauders keep him around for? They are at times bullying, although they trust him with their secrets, since he seems benign and admires them. Lily's eyes reproach James's taunts of him, like Hermione protecting Kreacher, who also betrayed them. I like the story, especially the opening when they slink in the dark in war time. Lupin watches Lily and James with "envy and curiosity," while the picture of baby Tonks giggles above him on the mantle. Everyone's fates are hanging over them this New Years Eve, some pleasant, others deadly, waiting in the future. And for all Lupin's wisdom, no apphrension or realistic insight can prepare him for how painful it will be when his group of friends, so happy and hopeful in this snapshot, will be tossed and torn in the "dark tide." What is "Il Fluff?"

Reviewer: moonetteDate: 2006-03-15
Reviewid: 140950Chapter: 1
Oh Helen I just love The Marauders. And I even more love one shots that completely immerse the reader in that world. You have such a way with description. I felt like I was there with them. And each character's personality shines through. Sirius practically jumps off the page. I also love reading your British accent. It makes things all the more genuine. And you have a wonderfully sharp sense of humor. Some of my favorite parts:

"Finally, James stopped before a small, two-storey cottage which fronted directly onto the street. Loud rock music could be heard coming from within. Pink Floyd, Remus thought. Or maybe The Hobgoblins. James rapped a rhythm on the door with his wand. There followed a thunderous thumping noise as someone hurtled excitedly to the door, and then a series of clicks and clunks as the bolts were unfastened, and Sirius Black flung the door wide with a whoop of joy."

Sirius has such an excitement and love of life. It's devastatingly sad. Remus is so thoughtful and quiet next to this force of nature.

"“Prongs! Moony!” he cried, seizing his friends’ arms and pulling them into the narrow hallway. “And Lily, too! Come in, come in! Leave your brooms here,” he said, indicating a broom-rack by the door."

These are the kinds of little details that make your story so real to the reader.

"Remus noted with a little dismay that Peter was wearing an apron over his robes; sometimes he made it too easy for Sirius."

LOL - that's your sharp wit. This story reminds me why people love the Harry Potter series so much. Such well drawn characterization. And the ending is heartbreaking, knowing what we know. Great job!

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-03-14
Reviewid: 140915Chapter: 1
Quite Nice

Reviewer: ReesieDate: 2006-03-11
Reviewid: 140810Chapter: 1
I loved this snapshot of the marauders - it is wonderful to feel that holiday glow and read about their happiness sharing it with each other (Peter - grrrr). Characterization was awesome. My favorite part was bring baby Tonks into the storyline:
"It was a picture of a pretty, dark-haired witch holding a bonny-looking baby with a headful of pale blonde curls. The baby was smiling and waving its chubby little hands at the camera, but every now and then it screwed up its little face and the pale curls turned a shocking shade of pink."
I loved this as well as seeing that soft paternal side of Sirius which we get to see a little of later with Harry.

Reviewer: dogstarDate: 2006-03-11
Reviewid: 140807Chapter: 1
I really enjoyed this. I got a shiver of foreboding when Sirius talked about joining Dumbledore and casually included Peter without bothering to ask him directly. I also thought it was very interesting how Remus feels uneasy about James and Sirius's casual ridicule of Peter but doesn't speak up for him against them. I found it very convincing the way you subtly indicate the minute 'cracks' in the various relationships - the slight tensions and resentments, that foreshadow how things turned out as they did. Brilliant characterisations.

I loved this bit too; "he could understand why his friend had chosen to live here: London Muggles were famously incurious." So true!

Reviewer: Genne-veraDate: 2006-03-11
Reviewid: 140803Chapter: 1
wow, this was really good, I rate E (in hogwarts ratings). you should continue. you have knack for a good one. ok, sorry, that didnt even make any sence to me... oh great there i go again

Reviewer: madame enDate: 2006-03-11
Reviewid: 140796Chapter: 1
Really nice fic- I'm glad you posted it and didn't hold onto it until next year. Everyone was nicely in character (what we know of them) and the story flowed really well. Great job.

Reviewer: Author by NightDate: 2006-03-11
Reviewid: 140790Chapter: 1
Oh, I love this! I'm so glad you posted it. :)

Reviewer: Madaline FabrayDate: 2006-03-10
Reviewid: 140781Chapter: 1
Very powerful piece, especially since we know what happens. It's so light in one sense -- things are beginning to happen, but much of it is still on the horizon. The characters are great -- especially Remus and Sirius. Poor Pettigrew -- I get the feeling at this point he hasn't been lost yet.

Reviewer: SeasprayDate: 2006-03-10
Reviewid: 140779Chapter: 1
I really liked this - very marauderish. The end made me shiver. Dark times ahead, indeed...

I really liked your characterisation of Remus. I loved how you captured his longing for a girlfriend and his slight jealousy over L/J, without making out like Remus was in love with Lily (a theory that bugs me no end). It was very true to the guy we meet in the books, but also to a eighteen year old guy with somne very serious obstacles in his path. I loved the introduction of baby!Tonks and Sirius going all gooey over her was just hilarious. I found your Peter interesting... he seemed quite unsure of himself with his friends. I liked how you showed him as having abilities and not being a total waste of space, as he is in some fics - being a good cook, and organising Sirius records. But at the same time there was something just a little creepy about the guy.
<“Did you have a good Christmas?” Remus asked Peter, dropping into the seat next to him on the sofa.

“Yes, yes, lovely, thank you. Just – just me and mother,” Peter mumbled, sipping at his wine.>

*Is reminded of Norman Bates* *shudders*.

Basically I think you captured everyone very well - hyperactive, and rather tactless Sirius, far sighted, lonely Remus, insecure Peter, smitten James and a very realistic teenage Lily. Good job!

Reviewer: ValaDate: 2006-03-10
Reviewid: 140768Chapter: 1
You know what I thought about this, but I'm going to say it here, too. Everyone was spot on and this seriously made my Christmas. James and Lily "already having a good New Year" had me rolling on the floor. I love how fun and sad this is at the same time. Thank you so much!

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