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Dumbledore's Army
Review(s): 67

Reviewer: MagikCatDate: 2007-01-22
Reviewid: 146957Chapter: 1
Hey. I reviewed ages ago, but I have an announcement. You inspired to write a 'fairy tale' of my own. It's a Jimmy Peakes/Natalie McDonald story based on 'Rapunzel'. I just finished the prologue, and I'm very proud of it. But I wanted to thank you for providing such a wonderful, enjoyable story. And while it's no where as good as yours, I'll hope you read it when I post it. I'll let you know.

Reviewer: slytherinatheartDate: 2006-09-27
Reviewid: 145508Chapter: 4
Yay! such a fabulous story deserves much praise, and TahDah, here am I. The personification of Theodore and Luna rocks and I am glad I read this story.

Reviewer: luckylib14Date: 2006-09-04
Reviewid: 145175Chapter: 4
Who knew I would become a Theodore/Luna shipper?! :D Well, I am now.

Amazing, amazing take on the frog prince story. I love your way of turning something we've all heard many times before into something completely original (while still following the basis of the real story). I love love loveeddddddd this. Absolutely heartwarming.

Reviewer: NARDate: 2006-08-24
Reviewid: 144995Chapter: 4
I've been neglecting SugarQuill lately, but when I returned, I found a really nice surprise, an other wonderful story.

Reviewer: PotioncatDate: 2006-08-17
Reviewid: 144842Chapter: 4
I really enjoyed this story. I couldn't believe you were sending Theodore away from Hogwarts, but I see now it had to be.

Reviewer: Zia MontroseDate: 2006-07-15
Reviewid: 144165Chapter: 3
Ah, the softening of Theo. He's thinking of giving that golden ball back, he backs down in an argument, he's hopeful of a girl flirting with him, he cares what she thought of his kiss, and most significantly: what makes Luna happy makes him happy... not just getting what he wants anymore. I liked his ruminations in his bed- so personal and hopeful.

Once again, I love your details. I love how you've taken the animals in "Fantastic Beasts" and imagined them to be tempted by blankets and oven cleaner. The way Luna studies all subjects at once is part of my fanon world now.

Your tapestry and lunar room were beautiful and I like the comparison of Theo to a marron. That was the implication, right?

I liked the kiss gone wrong: "Her response was instantaneous. She froze." Very Luna (and in the spirit of the innocent animal) and it ups the stakes for them.

"The Avalon Anarchists- With the merest whisper they have the power to lighten the blackest heart." Yes, Luna is one of them.

And a clever tie in to the Frog Prince that he needed a kiss from a fair maiden to complete his hair transformation.

Reviewer: Rob Grey 03Date: 2006-07-08
Reviewid: 144039Chapter: 4
This was a beautiful piece. Very well-written, and Luna was marvellously... Luna-esque. Your portrayal of Theodore Nott is brilliant - he's not his father. I think you may just have hit on something there.
The feel of the whole thing reminded me of the BT song Satellite - the song goes with it very well.
Favourite line: "Why had what he wanted always been as far away as the moon?"
I might start shipping Theodore/Luna now.
Overall, a wonderful story with plenty of beautiful moments. "It's been a good trip... Good trip." - BT, Satellite
Well done. In short - you handled this excellently.

Reviewer: buckbeakbabieDate: 2006-07-06
Reviewid: 143997Chapter: 4
Oh, wow, wow, wow. A few weeks absence and I have this to come back to. How I missed fluff.

I loved the scene with Theodore and Ginny. That was one of my favorite parts. Your Ginny is always perfect.

Sigh. I'm a big pile of goo. Loved it.

Reviewer: moonetteDate: 2006-07-05
Reviewid: 143978Chapter: 4
Oh, I loved this, St. Margarets. Theodore had a nice calmness about him in this chapter. The whole chapter felt unhurried and calm and peaceful. Theodore is really beginning to settle down. Luna has helped him begin to find his center. He's beginning to see that he can shape himself into something other than a shadow of his father's legacy, and that he has worth. I love how you describe their ineraction with each other. Understated, not overly passionate, but deeply caring. This was a beautiful journey for the two of them, and I loved watching Theo change and grow. So? Will there be a sequel?

Reviewer: dogstarDate: 2006-07-04
Reviewid: 143956Chapter: 4
I really love the intelligent way you negotiate your characters through this moral maze called life. Hmm - you really *are* a Ravenclaw :)

I wasn't sure about Theodore at first but by the end of the story I was convinced, it's very interesting to read a story about a Slytherin/Son of a Death Eater who chooses NOT to follow that path.

I know it was necessary for the story but I thought it was very harsh to make him leave Hogwarts before his education was completed, really just because of *who* he was, not what he was. But then again, with Dumbledore gone, who can say how standards might slip?

I really loved the atmosphere throughout this story - recognisably Hogwarts (the crescent room is a lovely invention) but a melancholy, grey and gloomy Hogwarts. Decidedly emptier without Dumbledore and our favourite Gryffindors.

Harry on the Isle of Drear without I sense a non-Fluffy tale crying out to be told?

A beautiful story *wipes tear*

Reviewer: Zia MontroseDate: 2006-07-02
Reviewid: 143885Chapter: 2
I love this! I'm still intrigued by the complex emotions that Theo is struggling with- trying to unwrap the resentful exterior to let truer emotions out.

~His flimsy hopes ripped into a thousand pieces.~

~That's not the way to repay evil- you don't stop evil with something more evil.

No, you stop it with something more evil.~

and the whole bit:
~Merlin help the sensible Slytherin...(references to different houses)...No wander Salazar had left the place~

Theo's anger at Luna's indifference only to find out she is mad at her mum for dying is complicated and poignant.

And the symbols, from the golden ball to the meat and all the others I miss make this rich.

But most importantly, it is an enticing story and I must know how it pans out!

Reviewer: JaneDate: 2006-07-02
Reviewid: 143876Chapter: 4
The Frog Prince was one of less favourite stories because the version I had of the story portrayed the princess as the most selfish, obnoxious brat. Instead of being obnoxious, Luna is sort of drifty and batty, which is nicer. I am glad that Theodore didn't turn into a "Gary Stu" Slytherin. I like the romancy character of your stories - just right for a fairy tale. I'm reading some of Dennis McKeirnan's fairytale stories at the moment. I enjoy the fairytale revisited thing!

Reviewer: zia montroseDate: 2006-07-01
Reviewid: 143867Chapter: 1
You are a master storyteller! I just finished Part One and this story moves along at a great pace. You introduce Theodore's thoughts to the reader just in time and in the right measure without bogging down the dialogue. And you DO succeed in make the reader sympathetic of him. Now, I'm curious about Luna. I love the imagery, especially of the cold night and waxing moon when they go to feed the thestrels. I also like how you play with quirky Luna stuff - Fathom fungus, snorkacks, mooncalves - and use it was common ground between them. I'm intrigued.

Reviewer: Mary A. WeasleyDate: 2006-06-29
Reviewid: 143812Chapter: 4
Okay, God, I love your Theodore and Luna characterizations, spot on, but I had a bit of a problem with Slughorn. True, he plays favorites to the extreme, but doesn't evidence suggest that he merely doesn't may much attention to those who aren't his favorites, not that he's horrible to them? Aside from that, of course, I died of love. I liked the ending with the CRAZY SYMBOLISM JUMPING OUT AT YA. It was just so, so sweet and I enjoyed every moment of it. I eagerly await your next fic!

Reviewer: Mary A. WeasleyDate: 2006-06-29
Reviewid: 143808Chapter: 3
Oh my gosh, the light and the leaving symbolism. It killed me with its splendor. Also, I think it's very hard to get the right balance of awkwardness. It's very easy to overdo, which you did not do. Ah, such perfection in awkwardness. So wonderful.

Reviewer: SeasprayDate: 2006-06-28
Reviewid: 143798Chapter: 4
Aww, this is just wonderful. As you probably know. I *love* your characterisation of Luna. You captured how utterly she lives in another world but also how logical she is within the rules of that world - she's not crazy, she just marches to a different drum beat. And she's so sweet, yet as Theodore notices, she tends to freeze/dissociate when people are mean to her (I was totally on Theo's side on the 'crows' incident. They *deserve* to have their stuff stolen). I loved the image of her throwing and catching the ball at the beginning, with Theo watching, half jealous, half fascinated. It was so perfectly Luna-like - it captures her strength and vulnerability so well.

Your Theodore totally won my heart. I loved his snarkiness and cynicism, his *nerve* and also his loneliness and need for goodness and love in his life. I *loved* the Slughorn interview - you captured Slughorn's nasty side so well, I felt so bad for poor Theo ( who so *is* talented! It takes a special kind of guy to fall in love with Luna, not to mention to win her love in return). You made me feel like these two characters needed each other - Theodore needed simple faith and love and goodness and simplicity. Luna needed someone a bit canny and worldly wise, but who appreciates how awesome she really is *sigh*. Really lovely. I won't beg for a sequel, because I know that's annoying, but well, it *would* be nice *bats eyelashes*.

Seriously, this is just such a lovely read - sweet and funny and life affirming as all your stuff is. *hankers after more St Margaret's fic*

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2006-06-26
Reviewid: 143711Chapter: 4
Sorry again about the very short review, but all I can say after the beautiful second half of this story lovey ^_^

Reviewer: moonetteDate: 2006-06-26
Reviewid: 143709Chapter: 3
""My grandfather used to send me out to hunt for Tebo," he said, mopping up the last of the gravy with his bun.

"But they're invisible."

"And they live in Africa," he acknowledged with a twisted smile. "Although I didn't know that at the time. Granddad thought it was a good joke." Theodore remembered now how pathetically hopeful he used to be as a boy – always looking for that invisible prize in the back garden."

Poor Theodore. He seems more human in this chapter - less selfish. I love how you've gradually done this. And Luna is wonderful here - I love the revelations about her life and family. And I love how those revelations, or even the most simple of her observations about anything, spur him on to self-examination. Great stuff, St. Margarets.

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2006-06-26
Reviewid: 143706Chapter: 2
Me still likey!

I'm really enjoying your depictions of Luna and Theodore here. I think Luna's very in-character, very patient and fey but with lots of depth, and it's great to read about a Slytherin other than Draco Malfoy. I loved how he got back at Luna's nasty roommates, even though Luna herself didn't, and his encounters with Ginny and the house-elves, who were delightful in this chapter as well.

Reviewer: Ara KaneDate: 2006-06-26
Reviewid: 143703Chapter: 1 likey!!!

Now, having said that, I was hoping to be able to say something about how glad I am that I decided to read this fic considering that I've fallen behind on my fic reading and don't really read many Luna stories even though I find her extremely fascinating, but I've been struggling to find the words because all I can think about, really, is to move on to the next chapter of your wonderful story :-p So I hope you don't mind if the meat of this review is "me likey," LOL.

Reviewer: Angelina WeasleyDate: 2006-06-25
Reviewid: 143700Chapter: 4
Aw, I liked this. I was waiting to review until the end, so here I am.

I loved how you showed the progression of Luna and Theodore's friendship- and eventually love- over the weeks/months. I also liked how you let the Rules drop away until they were happy just spending time with each other. Great story line, too.

As always, I'll congratulate you on your writing style, which captivates me everytime I read something of yours.


Reviewer: StarseaDate: 2006-06-25
Reviewid: 143693Chapter: 3
I think this is my favourite chapter. Theodore's Slytherin cunning is off-set by Luna's complete lack of reaction. You also make clear the physical nature of his longing for her without reducing it to mere lust. Their conversations were a lot of fun to read. My favourite part was the equation of Theodore with the marron, hounded by dogs that shouldn't even be used as hounds. Of course, the fact that they are Border Collies is another nod to him being shut out and alone.

Favourite Lines

""Okay." There was a hint of pink in her cheeks. "What do you want to do?"

Pull you in a dark corner and see if your mouth tastes as good as it looks and then maybe . . ." - poor Theodore, at the mercy of his hormones.

One typo: "even if by wild chance longer hair made him was as handsome as Blaise or Harry", the 'was' needs to be deleted. ^^


Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-06-25
Reviewid: 143687Chapter: 4
A surprisingly wonderful read. Thanks.

Reviewer: birdsongDate: 2006-06-25
Reviewid: 143683Chapter: 4
I just read all four parts and loved this story! Amazing how it could be a great story without Harry, Ron, or Hermione. I liked how you had Ginny confront Theo; how they both acknowledged that Luna didn't argue. And how you described Ginny. I also liked the way you developed Theo and Luna's characters, the conversations, explaning the hidden meanings in what Luna said. Once you understood that, she wasn't "loony". Again, great!

Reviewer: Hpgirl42095Date: 2006-06-25
Reviewid: 143679Chapter: 4
SEQUEL! I wanna see how Luna and Theo turn out... *pout* please? LOL. N e ways, great story

Reviewer: Eudora HawkinsDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143650Chapter: 4
I had every intention of leaving a review for each chapter, but I got to the end of chapter 2 and couldn't stop reading. I loved how Theodore's plan for vengence backfires and how he struggles to understand Luna's side of things. I loved, loved, loved his blurted apology in the next chapter. And the ending...*sigh* Wonderful!

This "one-shot" was so well done. Dialogue and imagery (loved the Avalonian Anarchists, the marron, and the lunar chapel) all first rate. I am just amazed at your characterizations. Your characters have so much depth. And I could see Theodore growing and changing with each chapter. A truly magical fairy tale!

Reviewer: glitterfairyxoxoDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143643Chapter: 4
Oh, my! I can't believe Theodore left! And oh, the whole thing was so sweet. I love this ship to pieces now. And Luna was just adorable! When she said she wanted to go with Theodore... cutest thing ever. And when Nott responded with the "Daddy would lose his mind if his underage daughter left school to play house with the son of a Death Eater." AHAHA! I'm sure Daddy Lovegood would go loony.
Soooo... ARE you going to make a sequel, because you're right: It is screaming out sequel. Maybe something written about their future or something?
Anyways, I loved it. You're such a talented writer. Keep up the amazing work!

Reviewer: J ForiasDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143640Chapter: 4
My goodness, you certainly have a talent for imagery. It would take me days to work through the depths of this story. I feel rather like a boat on top of an ocean, rather awed by the depth and quite happy to enjoy the results of it!

I'm not sure I agreed with Slughorn's portrayal, however. Theodore has been described as a clever loner and I would have expected Slughorn to spot Theodore's potential. However, I suppose the point of the Frog Prince is that everyone else sees a frog! So I'm sure it makes sense within the story.

But I'm curious now. Was Theodore's father (as representative of the Death Eaters in general) the last person Luna got angry at, or did I mistake something for a narrative hook which actually wasn't. Interesting.

And oh dear, I have probably said this in every review, but the Theodore/Luna banter is just fantastic. "Banter" isn't quite the right word, because Luna is so wonderfully unintentional about it.

--"I would be dreadful at playing house," she said solemnly. "I can't cook."

He ran his hand through his hair in frustration, and then was side-tracked by the fact that he had hair at all. That made him laugh at first and then sigh in resignation. "No, I reckon you can't cook."

"I always get distracted," she said equably. Then she brightened. "But I can make beds."

Luna in a bed . . . He swallowed. Bad idea. A very bad idea.--
*cracks up* Quite wonderful. And:

--She rushed to put her arms around his waist. "You'll be such a frog prince."

He laughed. "I'd rather be known for my frog kissing – but if you say so . . . "

"I do." She was adorably serious.

"So you can see why I can't let any Avalonian Anarchists into my kingdom." He touched the tip of her nose.

Like any good anarchist, she ignored her own no-kissing-in-public rule.--
And I know I'm quite useless. I'm sure you of all people know what you wrote! But I had to highligh how absolutely brilliant these bits of writing are. They fill the reader with a wonderfully warm sense of contentment.

Thank you for writing such a wonderful story about love and fulfilment. Strangely, I must be one of the few who doesn't hear the cry "sequel". There is a brilliant sense of completeness here. And the fact that they are seperated as the story ends is quite a hopeful message for me (with a girlfriend heading off to Syria for a year). Love isn't about the happy ending and the living together ever after. Love is a self-contained story in and of itself. That's the true victory!

Reviewer: J ForiasDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143639Chapter: 3
What is with women and long hair? And then one grows it and they change their mind! Well, I suppose in my case it doesn't so much grow long as grow out...

Oh dear. Is this review supposed to be about the story? Yikes!

I fiercely adore this story. I love Luna's innocence and I love the logic of her mind. Most of all, I love the respect that Theodore is learning to have for her logic. He's willing to follow it through and hold it high in his own heart. Of course, part of the reason for that is a surprising similarity in the way they think: "even invisible things leave footprints". The hunting analogy is very clever, because it allows them to be opposite and yet the same.

There's obviously some lunar/solar symbology going on, too, with the chapels, but I think that one's going over my head. *grins* The sun would be odd symbology for Theodore, on the face of things, anyway.

On a different note, I thoroughly enjoyed this line: --Was she flirting? He hoped so.-- Especially with the build up to it. The Luna/Theodore dynamic is quite wonderful.

Excellent chapter.

Reviewer: Ardie BeaDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143633Chapter: 4
Lovely, St. Margarets. Typically sharp writing and a very canon Luna in a very novel situation.

Reviewer: TDUDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143632Chapter: 4
I hadn't thought about Theodore not (Nott) being a deatheater - lovely idea. Your own private AU is working just fine! You really are an excellent shipwright - they may be small and experimental ships but they are definitely sound and sea-worthy!

Thanks, TDU

Reviewer: CornedBeeDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143630Chapter: 4
Why a one-shot? The more the merrier, and that is especially true for your stories.

Now for HBP from Ginny's PoV, right? :) Pretty please?

Reviewer: citysnidgetDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143621Chapter: 4
What I really love about this story is it brings a whole new side, not only to Slytherin, but to the sons of Death Eaters. I love how Theodore chooses his own way, chooses to help Harry. And I know that Luna is one of the hardest characters to write, and you wrote her very well and in character. You never would think it, but they're very compatible in this story.

This last chapter...I was sobbing all through the second half. You really did a wonderful job, and I agree with you that it should end unresolved.

Reviewer: TarsieSDate: 2006-06-23
Reviewid: 143620Chapter: 4
Oh, Well done! I especially like the symbolism of the painting!


You made me sniff back a tear at the end. Thank you.


Reviewer: moonetteDate: 2006-06-22
Reviewid: 143589Chapter: 2
Ooh, Theodore becomes more complex in this chapter. I love the glimmers of humanity that become more clear as the chapter progresses. Love the bits of angst, too. Not too much, but enough to make me sympathize. He's very intriguing as you've written him. I want to know more. Luna is Luna - wide-eyed, innocent, so sweet. Love her. Their interplay, and Theo's with Ginny, is first rate. Love your dialogue. And though I won't comment specifically on your symbolism (A major weak area for me) I am enjoying trying to see what I can identify in this one. Another stellar chapter!

Reviewer: Jim McGuffinDate: 2006-06-21
Reviewid: 143581Chapter: 3
Happy Summer Solstice day -- or "Ballentine," as (IIRC) you call it back in your Roger/Lisa fic.

I remember last year how you made fun of me for writing a fluff scene in the most overused of all places, the Astronomy Tower. So where do you set your Theo/Luna fluff scene? In the Astronomy Tower, of course.

Hmmm, so Theo is starting to have feelings for Luna, but apparently she doesn't feel the same way about him. Then again, it's very hard to read her emotions.

He tries to win Luna by growing his hair. A hair charm that needs "a kiss from a fair maiden"? Sort of reminds me of the Patronus kiss back in "Magic Within/Without."

The three days are over, but what's next for Theo. I wonder how much trouble he's in with Slughorn. (I assume he's the new Head of Slytherin since Snape's gone? This confirms that this is in a HBP universe.) I'll find out once you post the next chapter -- I can't wait!

Oh, and BTW, I tried looking up your LJ for "Ron the Builder." I found all these side stories, including one fluffy R/Hr scene when two Hufflepuffs had a wedding, but not "Ron the Builder" itself. Oh well!

Reviewer: dogstarDate: 2006-06-21
Reviewid: 143580Chapter: 2
I like Theodore a lot - he's a sympathetic character without sugar-coating his rougher side. Luna's statements about Mooncalves and Crumple-Horned Snorkacks were very in character. I also enjoyed how you showed the pack-mentality of her horrible roommates, who were convincingly teenage bitchy *shudder*.

I hope we find out that Theodore is wrong and that Luna actually couldn't care less about being seen with a Slytherin or what her tormentors think about her. Although she's isolated at Hogwarts, I see her as self-sufficient and not interested in being friends with people for the sake of company - but I suspect that's because I *want* to admire her for it and it could well be wish-fuilfillment on my part! It's certainly not a fault with how you've drawn her character - you've captured her independent spirit and gentleness beautifully.

I'm captivated by the romance and looking forward to seeing how Theodore changes.

Reviewer: AnyaDate: 2006-06-21
Reviewid: 143571Chapter: 3
"Okay – maybe I do." He shrugged in amusement. "But I certainly don't get over things - I get even." At her frown, he added reluctantly, "All right, maybe I don't always have to have revenge."

"I still don't know why some people stay angry and some don't."

"I don't know." He squirmed under her intense stare. "Maybe in your father's case he was just surprised at first – you know - that she killed his garden. And then once he saw her side of it, he saw it wasn't such a big deal."

That was a brilliant exchange! :D I love that Luna's intensity is shown here as just her simply not being able to comprehend things most of us just take for granted, but she's able to understand things beyond belief for most of us. She's brilliant like that, and you're wonderful for writing her that way! But we definetly see her hardcore Ravenclaw side in the library! No flaky hippie she! Luna knows her facts when she does her homework! Thank you for making her Ravenclaw brilliance shine through and showing us WHY she's there.

I am DYING to know why she wants to see Theo's hair longer. But poor Theo, springing on Luna and not getting "kissed back" *crosses fingers* here's hoping for the next chapter though! I love the tapestry detail, and the secret astronomy tower room *sigh*

Reviewer: AnyaDate: 2006-06-21
Reviewid: 143570Chapter: 2
*giggles* Those Slytherins sure love to look on the sly while the ladies are other wise occupied don't they? Poor teenage hormone riddled Theo! And lovely Luna finally getting her Mummy's hair charm to work on her (awww! That must have been wonderfuly comforting too!) Poor Luna, in just one telling phrase "Mummy didn't teach me alot of things before she died" we get a good feel for how she was lonely even with her Papa!

"And I can't even get you to care enough to argue with me. Because if you argued with me, maybe I could see your point, and maybe I could say I was sorry." The cold thing grew and pressed on his chest, causing his eyes to water. <-But this is brilliant charachterisation with Theo! I like how he keeps going, and going and going and going even though he's just stepped in it a thousand times! *aaaahhh* Charachterisation is a wonderful thing and you do it SO well and with such elegance!

Reviewer: TDUDate: 2006-06-21
Reviewid: 143566Chapter: 3
You really are the Queen of Fluff! My favourite lines were:

"I thought maybe you wanted to go on a Tebo hunt," she said solemnly.

Was she flirting? He hoped so.

How could you possibly tell with Luna?

I'm still not really over Charlie but in a parallel (fictional) universe, maybe . . .

Thanks, TDU

Reviewer: Eudora HawkinsDate: 2006-06-21
Reviewid: 143564Chapter: 1
Oh, St. Margarets, this is wonderful. Your stories always have such depth. So many layers. I really like how you've characterized Theodore -- rough around the edges, a bit smarmy, very Slytherin, but still vulnerable. I loved how Luna catches him off guard and gets him to reveal things about himself. Nicely done!
I'm looking forward to reading the other chapters.

Reviewer: TarsieSDate: 2006-06-20
Reviewid: 143543Chapter: 3
Yep, right around her finger. He is caught like fly paper.


Reviewer: Mary A. WeasleyDate: 2006-06-20
Reviewid: 143542Chapter: 1
it's always a really exciting moment when i find you've written something new. it's glorious. it's a really great luna impression and i like your take on theodore nott. i can feel so much symbolism brewing...

Reviewer: Jim McGuffinDate: 2006-06-17
Reviewid: 143493Chapter: 2
As I've promised, St. Maggie, I'm this fic as well, your own parody of a famous fairy-tae set in the HP world.

And so you return to the unique Theodore/Luna ship. I assume that this fic is in the Wallpaper/"Red Is the Heart" universe, since this is where you first introduce Theo/Luna, but then again, that universe would be pre-HBP.

We don't know much about Theo in canon, only that he's in Slytherin, his father's a Death Eater, and he can see the Thestrals. It's interesting, therefore, how you've written a Thestral scene, where Theo reveals that his mother, like Luna's, is dead. As different as they may be, they have at least this in common.

In this chapter, of course you find a way once again to slip in a reference to your favorite ship, as Ginny appears and Theo comments on how she's dating Harry.

As you point out in this chapter, inter-House relationships are always challenging, more or less. Theo's vindictiveness against Luna's roommates would be, in short, the Slytherin thing to do, and Ravenclaws like Luna cannot understand why he would do such a thing. The appearance of the house-elves Dobby and Winky is entertaining. LOL!

On the fluff scale, I'm not quite sure where this belongs. Sure, you focus on your two main characters, but so far there has been more arguing and clashing of the Houses than fluff. I'll have to read more until a fluff score can be given.

Overall, great as always, and I look forward to reading more. (Oh, and if I have time, I might check out your LJ and read "Ron the Builder," but I'm not a member of LJ and so I won't be able to comment directly.)

Reviewer: StarseaDate: 2006-06-17
Reviewid: 143468Chapter: 2
This is a great second chapter: it expands upon their relationship without losing the humour and imagery of the first. Theodore's encounter with Ginny was particularly interesting, since we see her from an outside perspective and he acknowledges that she's attractive. I liked how he earned her respect with his deviousness. It was even better given that Theodore, the cool Slytherin, is the one to lose his temper later. And the way he equates the pure, incorruptible gold with Luna - symbolic fluff or what? :D

Favourite Line: "He was obviously out of practice with being in the moment." - once again, you really capture the Slytherin mindset. All that planning doesn't leave a lot of time for life.

One mistake: "He was as exposed as a Mooncalf dancing at the full moon, except he had no fellow Mooncalves surrounding him to offer coverage from prey." I think you meant 'predators'? ^^

Looking forward to the next chapter,


Reviewer: Shina LarisDate: 2006-06-15
Reviewid: 143450Chapter: 2
I'm so glad that you've updated! This chapter is even better than the last one, and you have really explored Theodore's and Luna's characters here. I love how both of them are slowly changing because of their interactions with the other. And the last analogy about imps... It's just wonderful. I'm very much looking forward to the next chapter. =)

Reviewer: glitterfairyxoxoDate: 2006-06-15
Reviewid: 143441Chapter: 2
Well, that was a quick up-date! I'm glad, though. Waiting sucks. LOL.
Anyways, I read this the other day, but didn't have the time to comment, so I'm doing it now. :) This chapter was really great. I like how you put Ginny in this one! She's the greatest. I like how you made her Ginny-like. I hate when people don't portray her right, but you've got it down. I applaud you! LOL.
Hmm. I also like how you made Nott like any other teen boy, looking at Luna when she was doing that charm. That scene was really cute. Oh, and Dobby! He's quite silly. I love that little elf.
Anyways, great and amazing chapter. Loved it all. Up-date again soon!
aka Glitterfairyxoxo

Reviewer: MagikCatDate: 2006-06-14
Reviewid: 143432Chapter: 2
Very fluffy! You're one of my favorite authors and was so excited when I read this! That fairy tale thread seems interesting, and would like to take a look at it. Any chance you could tell where it is -- I can't seem to find it. Thanks!

Reviewer: TarsieSDate: 2006-06-14
Reviewid: 143430Chapter: 2
Ah, this is soooo good!Luna will bring him around. Can't wait for the next installment.

Reviewer: RosezellDate: 2006-06-14
Reviewid: 143428Chapter: 2
Your stories are always lovely, of course, but you've really outdone yourself with this one. Just wonderful.

Reviewer: StarseaDate: 2006-06-14
Reviewid: 143427Chapter: 1
What I noticed most in this chapter is the use of colour and how vivid things are for Theodore, even though he pretends to be blasé about everything. I loved Luna's musings on the world, on names and mothers. I love the way she touched a pain inside him that no one had ever addressed and soothed him. You've drawn some very interesting parallels between them without losing the humour - or the sexual tension!

Favourite Line:

"He gaped at her. "That's the whole point of life. What do you think ambition and intellect are for if you can't do what you want?"" - the Slytherin life philosophy in a nutshell. And Theodore's complete shock at finding someone who doesn't care about those things was brilliant.


Reviewer: J ForiasDate: 2006-06-13
Reviewid: 143422Chapter: 2
--All he needed to complete his morning was a herd of Hufflepuffs ready to swoop down on him for a group hug.--
I laughed out loud at that. The tone was wonderful.

I also thought the narrative hook of "who was the last person Luna got angry at" was well-placed. My guess would be her mother, although I'm sure there are plenty of other possibilities.

The fluff was fun and mischievous, as it should be! Poor old Nott. I suspect their dynamic will make for some very enjoyable romance! You have definitely chosen the pairing well.

The Ginny appearance was well written and I think she and Nott could have a fun sort of dynamic, too. I find myself wondering whether you intend to expand the story into an action-adventure dealing with some of the events that will occur in Book 7 (e.g. the resolution of the war) or whether the plot will be mostly confined Theodore's and Luna's romance.

But yes, thanks for another chapter. I eagerly await more!

Reviewer: J ForiasDate: 2006-06-13
Reviewid: 143421Chapter: 1
I really like this story. It has a very gritty, real feel to it, thanks to the presence of Theodore, which is nicely balanced by Luna's innocent, insightful simplicity. There's a wonderful sense that the characters have been thoroughly mapped out and have a great deal of depth to them.

I liked Luna's insight into names and the idea that everything is as simple as what it is named as, which is perfectly contrasted to Theodore's world of deceit and subterfuge where nothing can be trusted to be what it appears, just as Luna's philosophy of "ask" and "recieve", trust and hope are contrasted to Theodore's tangle of anger, revenge and counter-revenge.

I also think you have achieved a great deal by making Theodore rather mean, but likeable at the same time. Theodore is using Luna to get information about Potter and he says some very cruel things. Yet you seem to make it apparent that a lot of this is more about habity and the role that he has been stuck in by those around him, as well as a healthy serving of pride.

I thoroughly enjoyed this chapter. I haven't read "The Frog Prince" so I guess I'll be surprised by the plot. I also hope to see some Ginny appearances in it (fan that I am)!

Reviewer: VerinDate: 2006-06-13
Reviewid: 143408Chapter: 2
This is terrific! I loved this line:

"All he needed to complete his morning was a herd of Hufflepuffs ready to swoop down on him for a group hug."

Luna is very nicely in character. So is Ginny. I was hoping she would appear at some point!
A pity that after two heroic showdowns against Death Eaters, Luna's roommates still treat her so horribly.

Reviewer: TDUDate: 2006-06-13
Reviewid: 143394Chapter: 2
Well, the room mates deserved it even if it didn't work out that well for Luna. I think Ginny will come round to Theodore; she's a very fair person both in your stories and JKR's world. Actually, I'm coming round to Theodore! So all the other Slytherins (7th year boys at any rate)have left, not just Draco? Thanks for another wonderful chapter.

Reviewer: glitterfairyxoxoDate: 2006-06-12
Reviewid: 143381Chapter: 1
You're the most amazing author on this site! I love your writing style and plotlines. And the ships you write; they make perfect sense!
Very good job so far! Up-date soon!

Reviewer: hermiaDate: 2006-06-12
Reviewid: 143380Chapter: 1
Oh, I am SO glad you've started another story! Theodore is always a fascinating person to peer into, too.

Reviewer: PotioncatDate: 2006-06-12
Reviewid: 143379Chapter: 1
What a lovely story. Both of the characters are so well developed. Luna is in character, yet seems a bit different through Nott's eyes than Harry's. Your Nott is very interesting.

Reviewer: Pineapple QueenDate: 2006-06-12
Reviewid: 143378Chapter: 1
"They stopped laughing, but his words didn't wipe the smirks from their faces. "Try it, Nott," Glasses said. "We're smarter than you."

"Maybe," he said with a matching smirk. "But I'm meaner.""

Best. Line. Ever.

And I love this. Will there be a continuation?

Reviewer: Shina LarisDate: 2006-06-11
Reviewid: 143367Chapter: 1
You have an unbelieveable ability to make any pairing appears wonderful. I love this story very much, and I especially love Theodore and Luna's interactions. =)

Reviewer: CornedBeeDate: 2006-06-11
Reviewid: 143366Chapter: 1
Can I just sigh happily at having a new story from you?

Reviewer: moonetteDate: 2006-06-11
Reviewid: 143363Chapter: 1
Wow. This is a very well written beginning to an intriguing story. It is going to be so much more than a simple fairy tale. I LOVE how you've written Theodore. (you know how I love angst in leading men, LOL) He is so real and complex and has a lot of "stuff" to work through, and I can't wait to see Luna's role in this, though I can see already that she is opening his eyes. This story drew me in immediately, and I took a mini vacation while I read it. Thanks so much! Looking very forward to your updates.

Reviewer: Forgotten CatDate: 2006-06-11
Reviewid: 143362Chapter: 1
This is great! I can't wait to see where you go with it.

Reviewer: AaragogDate: 2006-06-11
Reviewid: 143357Chapter: 1
This has got to be one of the most improbable pairings I've ever heard of (discounting blatant and/or off the wall distortions of canon like Harry/Snape, Harry/Draco, Hermione/Draco etc). And yet, so far you've made me believe it.

It helps that JK Rowling hasn't provided a lot of detail about Theodore Nott. Gives you room to maneuver.

Reviewer: PygmyPuffDate: 2006-06-11
Reviewid: 143349Chapter: 1
Ooh. Very unexpected and interesting. The "frog prince" conceit (I mean that not in the sense of conceited but as an extended metaphor) is a nice framework for introducing this relationship. I like the complexity you've given Nott. And Luna's extremely in-character, I would have to say. Are we going to get to see any other canon characters? My only quibble is that I can't see the house-elves letting the food quality sink.

Oh dear, I better end this review before I have to go join SPEW or something... ;)

Reviewer: TarsieSDate: 2006-06-10
Reviewid: 143345Chapter: 1
St Margaret, I love your stories! I am glad to see Luna and Theodore together again. Can't wait for the second part.

I also hope you are going to continue the Red is the Heart series.

Reviewer: TDUDate: 2006-06-10
Reviewid: 143337Chapter: 1
I really wasn't sure about this pairing - which was entirely your fault as you had convinced me that Luna and Charlie would be perfect together! However, I think that Luna will just have to live in two separate planes of existence so I can imagine her with either of them. That was lovely - and rather sad. I'm so glad Theodore's getting revenge on her room mates for her!

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