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Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Revelation I:II
Review(s): 7

Reviewer: WhimsyDate: 2006-10-26
Reviewid: 145938Chapter: 1
Fascinating! If Professor Binns' history lessons were like this, I think more students would pay attention. There were so many wonderful little references here, both historical and mythological, and the names and words you chose helped create a feeling of authenticity to it all. Earendel in particular was an interesting choice, given the presence of the elves. ;-) But it wasn't just the names, it was the style of writing, too - an older style (e.g. "a dark look that could have rent iron", "for it is an odd thing that an elf such as he could not immediately see through the disguises of wizards"), almost Tolkien-esque in places. (I've just realised - that's what the glade reminded me of, in Revelations 1: Fangorn forest.) But little details like Earendel learning at Lindisfarne, the veil room being an old Roman amphitheatre, and the Old Icelandic insults also help a great deal to make it feel more like we're reading from a piece of yellowing parchment, painstakingly scribed by some long-dead monk, rather than on a computer monitor.

The elves themselves are an intriguing addition. I liked the mention of the Lord Oberon, the Faerie King, and the way they had all left our shores long ago (by our reckoning, if not theirs); Egill himself/itself was good too, a mixture of defiance and disdain for the wizards holding him and nameless fear at what lay behind the veil. (Although I wasn't sure if they're immortal in your tale or not, because he says, "the one who comes for us all".) It was obvious Egill was only afraid of that and not of the wizards themselves; makes me wonder if they could have continued to hold him prisoner if he/it really wanted to escape.

That said, I am a bit confused about one thing - why was the elf a prisoner at all? Why were Njall's men waiting by the veil in the first place? I like that Egill and the other elf were searching for those who had tarried too long in our lands, but Earendel seemed to treat him with respect even if Njall didn't, so it doesn't seem as if wizards and elves are enemies.

I also think perhaps it could do with a little more to ground it firmly in the HP universe; the mentions of the various Founders was clever, and I liked the cameo appearance by Hufflepuff's Patronus (so that's where Dumbledore got the idea from!), but apart from the veil itself, we didn't really see anything we could immediately recognise. Not that it detracts from the story, it's just that it feels a bit more isolated in a way.

The veil itself, of course, was very spooky. And it makes more sense now that I've read the first Revelations, so I know who the pale figure really is and why he had a garland of grass. There are so many amazing little details in this story, like Egill saying " was as though the fimbulvetr had descended upon my very soul..." - I had to look it up, but it fits perfectly! A long winter before the end indeed. And I loved how Earendel was trying to convince himself that the Norseman's superstition and the elf's myth were just that, and yet all the while he instinctively knew what the veil was, and it was only at the end that his fears were proven correct. It really helped build up the sinister atmosphere to the story.

I definitely hope you write more of these Revelation pieces. They're so chilling, but in a good way. :-)

Reviewer: Norwegian BlueDate: 2006-10-25
Reviewid: 145917Chapter: 1
That will teach me to read your stuff after dark. You'd think I'd have learned by now. The description of Death, both to Earendel and when Earendel sees him, is enough to cause nightmares if you think about it too much. I'm still not sure about the elves, but I think I may have to reread to fully get the effect.

Reviewer: AryaDate: 2006-10-24
Reviewid: 145916Chapter: 1
I liked this, though it was a bit hard to follow at first (I blame the music that was playing). I like the way that you tied in bits of history while writing a very good fanfic. Also, I loved how, instead of having Earendel describe the young man, he remembers how the elf described him. It was very effective.

What year is this set? Is it Pre-Hogwarts? The mentions of Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff slightly confused me...are they the forefathers of Godric, Rowena, and Helga? Also, I'd love to know what happened to the elves...these seem like Tolkien elves (though the descriptions are a bit vague). Where did they go? Why? I hadn't really thought about there being other types of elves, but I suppose it's possible.

Great fic!

Reviewer: Reader 2Date: 2006-10-24
Reviewid: 145904Chapter: 1
Seriously Wicked. Thanks

Reviewer: AnyaDate: 2006-10-24
Reviewid: 145901Chapter: 1
*mmmmm Hiiiistory Fiiiic* Girl you know I love me some history fic! And theres old languages, and mingling of "muggle" history and magical history! If I tried to name each little part I liked I'd end up repeating the whole thing! I do wish you'd write more History fics, it's brilliant stuff and I'm incredibly envious that you're so good with this history and language!

Reviewer: Ada KensingtonDate: 2006-10-24
Reviewid: 145895Chapter: 1
HlBr: Oh no! Birgit was right. I should have made it more clear. The elves in my story are the High-Elves, the ones who feature in Norse mythology and the ones Tolkien nicked and used for his (though I think Norse elves are much more arrogant and sinister than Tolkien paints them - more like angels than earthly creatures). Different species. They left England and the spheres of this world long ago - in time for people to remember it, but well before written record. (Think of 'A Midsummer Night's Dream' and other stories of the faerie folk). The memory of the High Elves survived in oral tradition, in other words, but there was no concrete information about them. Much like witches and wizards. ;)

I was saying I think Jo called house-elves that for a reason - to draw a distinction between the little gnome/imp like creatures that fetch people's tea and do their washing, and the elves (or high-elves) of more enduring mythologies. In this short, Egill the elf, is a high-elf, not a house-elf. =)

Reviewer: HlBrDate: 2006-10-24
Reviewid: 145889Chapter: 1
Wow, and I mean, Wow!

Amazingly weird, but good. Perhaps one needs too much background information to understand it fully, and in consequence enjoy it, but very nice indeed.

Now I'm very curious about how the proud elves come to be house elves, are you going to put it in another story?


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