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Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Chainsmoking Harry
Review(s): 137

Reviewer: Heart and SolDate: 2008-10-13
Reviewid: 151158Chapter: 1
Now, here's the thing. There are occasions where I'll say in a review that a story made me laugh. Usually, I mean I only thought it was funny, as in the simple act of thinking "oh, that's kinda funny," and if I thought it was very, very funny, I might have even smiled a bit. The kind of smile where only the corners of your mouth move a fraction of an inch. This story--truth, here!--had me laughing out loud. Well done.

Reviewer: luckylib14Date: 2006-09-11
Reviewid: 145293Chapter: 1
WOW. lmfao. I don't think I've ever laughed so hard while reading a fanfic. HILARIOUS.

Reviewer: FirewhiskeyBombDate: 2006-08-10
Reviewid: 144733Chapter: 1
Sheer awesome.
Thank you. I'm so sick of seeing fics with the trio hooking up left and right... they're 15. I never got laid at 15. Heck I'm 19 and I barely ever get laid.
Um, yeah. So excellent. Chain-smoking Harry, Charlie with a penchant for billywigs... so good. perfect.

Reviewer: dobbinDate: 2006-03-04
Reviewid: 140516Chapter: 1
Oh, I wish you would keep on writing...but nothing since 2002!

Reviewer: hannah_88Date: 2005-12-19
Reviewid: 137389Chapter: 1
you're a bit mad, aren't you? anyway it was good fun!

Ginny: [giggles, blushes, giggles] I like butterbeer

Reviewer: MarjDate: 2005-11-01
Reviewid: 135592Chapter: 1
Love. It. "I like paper" may be the funniest line ever.

Reviewer: AdamDate: 2005-08-16
Reviewid: 130095Chapter: 1

Reviewer: MargaretDate: 2005-07-31
Reviewid: 128357Chapter: 1
This is a very funny story. Is it pre-Half-Blood Prince? Because the Lavender thing has actually become cannon. Love the way you poke fun at some of the fanfiction cliches.And I liked the bit about them being underage.

Reviewer: SerenaDate: 2005-07-24
Reviewid: 127728Chapter: 1
someone posted a link to this at HPFF, and its great! Very funny, i loved it!

Reviewer: not importantDate: 2005-07-23
Reviewid: 127694Chapter: 1
omg that was like one of the funniest things ive ever read. keep up the good work!!!!

Reviewer: anonymousDate: 2005-07-07
Reviewid: 126368Chapter: 1
oh my... i laughed so hard while reading. the part i really liked was hermione magically changing her appearance- i hate how other authors seem to think that she can't find a relationship until she dresses like a cloned tart.

Reviewer: ReesesPiecesDate: 2005-06-24
Reviewid: 125001Chapter: 1
Weird. That was weird.


Reviewer: KatieDate: 2005-05-29
Reviewid: 122967Chapter: 1
Never canon, but hilariously funny! I was laughing the whole way! Of course there are things in there with major problems, but it's all fake so it's ok. Like how Harry's gay then he wants to have sex with Ginny. . . but like I said it's fake and light and funny and amazing.

Reviewer: Reader2Date: 2005-04-25
Reviewid: 120623Chapter: 1
Parody - yes. Humor - yes. Funnt - no. Eh!

Reviewer: Jamie-louise squiresDate: 2005-04-22
Reviewid: 120354Chapter: 1
best commical storie on e-net so far like the idea of harry being a smoker and kind of gay and the way you were talking to the readers and the characters i hope to read more of these fantastic stories keep um cumin

Reviewer: BlankDate: 2005-01-29
Reviewid: 112333Chapter: 1
LoL, that was good! It definetly put a BIG smile on my face. More sooon, please!

Reviewer: wee meeDate: 2005-01-14
Reviewid: 110820Chapter: 1
ok, this was funny and all, but you know what? i like paper too. and just because ginny likes paper doesn't make her stupid. i'm not stupid. i'm smart. and i deserve respect.

Reviewer: MadoldmrsfiggDate: 2005-01-05
Reviewid: 109865Chapter: 1
"Harry: Ginny's Ron's little sister, I couldn't... Ron really has nice broad shoulders, don't you think? Hermione's a lucky girl. Sometimes I -"

BWHAHAHA! Oh, hilARious. Can't blame the kid though, Ron is irrisistable. ;D

Perfect parody - clever how you turn the H/H, Ron-hate and stupiduseless!Ginny arguments around. Aaah, this is why i love the Quill so much. Thanks!

Reviewer: SaeasDate: 2004-10-08
Reviewid: 100787Chapter: 1
Hehe, that was so funny! I especially liked 'Do you like my hair? I straightened it with my personalized hair conditioner, because as we all know, curly hair is unattractive. Over the summer I also grew 6", developed a sudden passion for the Muggle group Backstreet Boys, and started dressing like a tramp [spins to model micro-mini and low cut belly shirt]. What do you think?' Honestly, when will people learn? ;-)

Reviewer: eleanorDate: 2004-09-27
Reviewid: 99466Chapter: 1
this "story" is bloody brilliant! I have tears in my eyes even now!

Reviewer: janeDate: 2004-08-24
Reviewid: 98401Chapter: 1
Brilliant! Simply Brilliant. Iíve read some truly awful stories lately, so reading this piece had my husband wondering if I had completely lost it from laughing so much. Chain-smoking Harry indeed!

Reviewer: Jo WickaninnishDate: 2004-08-14
Reviewid: 97167Chapter: 1
Oh my goodness, I'd read lots of comments about your story over the months I've been at the Quill, but I just hadn't gotten around to it. This is a fantastic parody. Mildly disturbing, but really quite entertaining.

I particularly liked:
Harry: [bites lip] Gosh, I don't know, I've never thought of Ginny like that before. [turns to Ginny] You do know that Voldemort is after me, and that I could by brutally murdered at any moment, right?

Ginny: [giggles, blushes] I like paper.

And especiall:
"Got that, those of you who blew right by the "please read another story if you're too young" warning? And while I'm at it - if you're underage, for the love of God, please stop sending us smut to beta! We can only take so much!"

-From one beta to another- God bless you! :0)

Keep up the good work, I can't wait to read more of your stories.

Reviewer: Geena WatersDate: 2004-08-05
Reviewid: 95961Chapter: 1
That was crazy...that's all I have to say, crazy, lol.


Reviewer: LisaDate: 2004-08-01
Reviewid: 95098Chapter: 1
Wait a second while I scream hysterically with laughter. . . Okay. For some reason, I now find the thought of Harry chainsmoking really, really funny. It's all your fault!! Oh, well. This story was wonderfu- [pauses]. Harry, is that your hand on Ron's ass?

My mind is permanantly scarred.

Reviewer: 13 and UnderDate: 2004-07-31
Reviewid: 94833Chapter: 1
oh my god thats so funny. i liked Ginny espeshally!

Ginny: [giggles, blushes] I like paper.

that is probably my favorite part!!! i love this, its so weird and funny!

13 and Under

Reviewer: ChristineDate: 2004-07-22
Reviewid: 93491Chapter: 1
ROFLMAO! I love it!

Reviewer: FORUM GHOSTDate: 2004-07-20
Reviewid: 93345Chapter: 1

Reviewer: PazaDate: 2004-07-11
Reviewid: 91806Chapter: 1
Awesome, I laughed for hours... I liked what you did with Harry and Ginny most! Keep it up...

Reviewer: Luna LovegoodDate: 2004-07-03
Reviewid: 90316Chapter: 1

Reviewer: sanggaDate: 2004-06-28
Reviewid: 89245Chapter: 1
oh, bloody hell, i'm sure you've heard it reams of times, but this is absolutely *classic* - classy classic too, some parodies just don't seem to have enough bite to 'em. certainly not a problem here, and your grossly inappropriate rampage through canon had me Rolling On Floor etc etc. was hoping to catch a glimpse of malfoy shaking out his peroxide locks and harry eyeing him off, but maybe next time. lovely jaunt - i had a ball! thanks for the read, and keep up the great writing!

Reviewer: Raven CDate: 2004-06-23
Reviewid: 88371Chapter: 1
hey, I thought this was UN-canon! but Ginny's still stupid, Harry's a pimp, and Bill and Charlie are hot! whassup with that?
just joking. couldn't stop laughing actually. which probably explains the librarians glares...

Raven C

Reviewer: zee lumosnoxDate: 2004-05-30
Reviewid: 85225Chapter: 1
b, you are totally awful. and I LOVE IT! this is the story i always some to when i need a laugh. i am always in hysterics...

"theres just something about leather loinclothes...."


Reviewer: jstur83@aol.comDate: 2004-05-02
Reviewid: 81019Chapter: 1
that was so funny i almost wet myself thank you for pointing out almost every stupid thing that can happen in fan fic but you forgot to have neville crying his eyes out over loseing ginny/hermione/harry/lavender as a potential girlfriend

Reviewer: Avada my wonderful ass!Date: 2004-05-01
Reviewid: 80934Chapter: 1
love love love!
but what is wrong with harry/draco? So it could never happen and it's unrealistic but-
shutting up.

Reviewer: NeoEpiphanyDate: 2004-04-18
Reviewid: 79281Chapter: 1
I just want to say that I stumbled across this story, and I laughed so hard reading it that I choked on my macaroni and cheese, and had to self-administer the heimlich. (I'm not joking.) The sheer hilarity of this story caused a near-death experience.
THAT is quality humor.

Reviewer: Lara GaeaDate: 2004-03-10
Reviewid: 73874Chapter: 1
LMAO!!! OMG, I have loved all your stories, but this one is the best, pure and simple. :) You're one funny, clever, sick writer! Never stop.

Reviewer: StefanieDate: 2004-03-09
Reviewid: 73796Chapter: 1
wow that was hilarious!

Reviewer: EricaDate: 2004-03-07
Reviewid: 73469Chapter: 1
Um...Wow. Quite amusing. Lol...I love the thing about the billywigs...

Reviewer: CornedBeeDate: 2004-03-04
Reviewid: 73159Chapter: 1
Words elude me...

Reviewer: betsyDate: 2004-02-24
Reviewid: 72139Chapter: 1
Hey i loved this story, and i have a story that would attract the same kind of attention but completely different, my friends read it and i was wondering if you could edit it and help me to submit it. Thanks, betsy

Reviewer: Dark SaiyanDate: 2004-02-20
Reviewid: 71481Chapter: 1
Absolutely hilerious, made absolutely no sence and was still funny. brilliant.

Reviewer: NARDate: 2004-02-09
Reviewid: 70000Chapter: 1
Now this is "something completely different" from any stories I've read here. Great!

Reviewer: DillybeanDate: 2004-02-08
Reviewid: 69876Chapter: 1

Reviewer: Ginny LopezDate: 2004-01-30
Reviewid: 68964Chapter: 1
"Harry: [bites lip] Gosh, I don't know, I've never thought of Ginny like that before. [turns to Ginny] You do know that Voldemort is after me, and that I could by brutally murdered at any moment, right?

Ginny: [giggles, blushes] I like paper."
LMAO! This is also my FAV part cuz I was reading it and thinking "Who listens to those anywayz??"
But no sex in my story at your age. [turns to readers]. Got that, those of you who blew right by the "please read another story if you're too young" warning?
Keep writing, B!

Reviewer: FrankieDate: 2004-01-28
Reviewid: 68771Chapter: 1
"I like Paper."

Pretty darn spiffy. I laughed my socks off. Unless that was Ginny. . .

Reviewer: betty cDate: 2004-01-24
Reviewid: 68296Chapter: 1
how this is soooooooo cool! My mate Rach egan told me about it & shes right this is sooooooooooo cool! (am i repeating myself??) Bye!!!!!!

Reviewer: betzieDate: 2004-01-19
Reviewid: 67679Chapter: 1

Reviewer: DanielaDate: 2004-01-10
Reviewid: 66459Chapter: 1
Ron: [reaches for Hermione's hands and leans in for a kiss] Hermione, you're wonderf - [pauses]. Harry, is that your hand on my ass?

CLASSIC!!!!!!! I WAS IN HYSTERICS WHEN I READ THIS PART!!! IT IS HILARIOUS! CLASSIC! LUV IT! AND DARN GOOD! LOL. You got it sooo right! lol. Some ppl goooosh! ruin teh characters, like Hemrione! FAB-U-LOUS!!!!

Reviewer: MarinaDate: 2004-01-01
Reviewid: 65429Chapter: 1
hey. omg. that is wickedly funny. my friend loves it (i think shes turned into ginny from ur story.) lol. oh well. great story.

Reviewer: RachDate: 2003-12-31
Reviewid: 65333Chapter: 1
That was so funny! You have to write more! OMG, I'm, like, in stitches over here! My cat got scared by all the laughing!
Oh well, I'm off to write depressing fics and before I scare you more than I did the cat...
Dudette called Rach.

Reviewer: DanielaDate: 2003-12-29
Reviewid: 65051Chapter: 1
and OMG! I thought that this was hilarious! So many Fan Fic writers do these things!! It was quite hysterical! Me and my friend are lik e"we wanna write one!!" this was truly enjoyable! and i just might read it again sometime, just for a good laugh! i luved it! it's hysterical and marvelous! keep it up!

Reviewer: CalixaDate: 2003-12-24
Reviewid: 64703Chapter: 1
Harry: [bites lip] Gosh, I don't know, I've never thought of Ginny like that before. [turns to Ginny] You do know that Voldemort is after me, and that I could by brutally murdered at any moment, right?
Ginny: [giggles, blushes] I like paper.
Harry: [a glow spreads over his face] Ginny! Baby! Come'on, let's find an empty broom closet and I'll show you How Deep is My Love.
You know, I keep reading that bit and I never get tired of it!

Reviewer: celestina blackDate: 2003-12-21
Reviewid: 64267Chapter: 1
Harry: [bites lip] Gosh, I don't know, I've never thought of Ginny like that before. [turns to Ginny] You do know that Voldemort is after me, and that I could by brutally murdered at any moment, right?

Ginny: [giggles, blushes] I like paper.
aaahhhh loveit.

Reviewer: SuzyDate: 2003-12-19
Reviewid: 63997Chapter: 1
Very Very, fuuny!! I laughed my head off all the way through. "they figure I'm going to be pretty messed up by the 7th year, so I figure a crush on my best friend fits well with the idea." H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S, I was almost in tears!

Reviewer: Dobby rox my soxDate: 2003-11-26
Reviewid: 60863Chapter: 1
that is a very funny fan fic,
except it is very scary in places.
nice point about the
Harry/Lavender bit. it
is totally true!

Reviewer: BrytniDate: 2003-11-09
Reviewid: 59519Chapter: 1
Very funny!
"I like paper." I love your take on Ginny! lol!
This is the best parody I've ever read! Hilarious!

Reviewer: AdamDate: 2003-11-08
Reviewid: 59270Chapter: 1
ok, that was just messed up. (i mean that in a good way) incredibly funny, messed up, but incredibly funny

Reviewer: Anaisa127Date: 2003-11-05
Reviewid: 58915Chapter: 1
What can I say? I laughed through the whole thing. Very entertaining.

Reviewer: JennyfromtheBurrowDate: 2003-10-16
Reviewid: 56609Chapter: 1
"You do know that Voldemort is after me, and that I could by brutally murdered at any moment, right?"
That is the hardest I've laughed out loud since George hinted at inviting Pig to the ball!
- Jenny

Reviewer: SerenaDate: 2003-10-11
Reviewid: 56276Chapter: 1
I have never laughed so hard...this is such a perfect story...I can't even begin! Very true, all of it. So funny...

Reviewer: DanielleDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54950Chapter: 1
I like this. (< Ginny needs a brain!)

Reviewer: DanielleDate: 2003-09-30
Reviewid: 54948Chapter: 1
Ummm Yeah Lovely Though

Reviewer: VertexDate: 2003-09-27
Reviewid: 54543Chapter: 1
Hey, I just realised something. As a Mary Sue character in this story you have to end up with Snape, it's always Snape! You are supposed to be the only one who understands him and can love him even if he is a greasy old git, you are the one to make him forgive himself for his horrible past (if you are 20+ that is) it's practically a law.

Mary Sue(20+) = Marry Snape!


Reviewer: VertexDate: 2003-09-27
Reviewid: 54542Chapter: 1

You really got them all! Well perhaps you missed a few "Snape is a wonderful dad freaks" but that's all!

Good luck with Bill and Charlie, just don't let them get hold of your quill! Who knows what I might be reading next then!

Reviewer: StarseaDate: 2003-09-26
Reviewid: 54451Chapter: 1
This really made me smile... I love the whole thing about Charlie and Bill being in dragon loincloths and this reminding Harry of Draco... *lol* At least you didn't have HIM in here too. Though I would love to see your take on that pairing... Bye for now.


Reviewer: Teresina DragonwagonDate: 2003-09-21
Reviewid: 53876Chapter: 1
This absolutely cracked me up. I do believe I've read it before, but honestly it doesn't matter because it's so hilarious. I especially like Ginny for some bizarre reason. Yay for you!

Reviewer: DaniDate: 2003-09-21
Reviewid: 53773Chapter: 1
LMAO! HYSTERICAL! its better the 2nd time around! lol

Reviewer: krazigurlDate: 2003-09-14
Reviewid: 52574Chapter: 1
...........ok, this one just scares me a little, but it is well written. I can't even imagine this happening! *shivers*

Reviewer: Paige Knorr (The Muggle Hermione)Date: 2003-09-05
Reviewid: 50805Chapter: 1
B Bennet,
Just a little add on.. I somehow do those a lot.. Don't make fun of paper. It's office supplies. I love office supplies. That's in fact the only kind of shopping I do... woah...

Paige Knorr

Reviewer: Paige Knorr (The Muggle Hermione)Date: 2003-09-05
Reviewid: 50804Chapter: 1
B Bennet,
I'm not sure if this is my first time reviewing it... I really don't know. I'm tired and my dog's barking in his sleep. Freaky. I'm a freak. I'll stop now. VERY FUNNY STORY! I loved it! Got to go but I LOVED IT!

Paige Knorr

Reviewer: QuillDate: 2003-09-03
Reviewid: 50462Chapter: 1
Oh my God! That was hysterical! I've never read anything so funny for months!

Reviewer: ShaeDate: 2003-08-29
Reviewid: 49259Chapter: 1
I just want to say that your story absolutely killed me. i hope draco was waiting in leather trousers at the three broomsticks. that was the funniest thing i've read all day (and all yesterday for that matter)

Reviewer: MalinDate: 2003-08-26
Reviewid: 48793Chapter: 1
That was a great parody! Totally loved it!

Reviewer: BoredDate: 2003-08-25
Reviewid: 48605Chapter: 1
haha very funny fan fic

Reviewer: Forgotten MarauderDate: 2003-08-22
Reviewid: 48201Chapter: 1
Ginny: [giggles, blushes] I like paper.
OMG you have killed me with laugter!!! That line is CLASSIC!!!(And after reading OotP, it only makes me laugh harder!) God and then there's Harry feeling everyone, him hitting on Lavender, who rejected him...The Weasley boys in loincloths *woof whistle* heehee

Reviewer: Celestina BlackDate: 2003-08-18
Reviewid: 47743Chapter: 1
oh, and...
"i like paper"

Reviewer: Celestina BlackDate: 2003-08-18
Reviewid: 47742Chapter: 1
oh, wait, not done

Reviewer: hydraspitDate: 2003-08-17
Reviewid: 47458Chapter: 1
*falls over laughing* this is great, really great.

Reviewer: AngelfeatherDate: 2003-08-11
Reviewid: 46642Chapter: 1
That was tongue-in-cheek genius. I couldn't help it, I burst into uncontrollable laughter (and laugh every time I think about it) when Ginny said, "I like paper." :)

Reviewer: mariaDate: 2003-08-05
Reviewid: 45613Chapter: 1

<Ginnny: I like paper"
thats sooo funny!

Reviewer: maryDate: 2003-08-04
Reviewid: 45373Chapter: 1
how dare you think of harry as a smomker or a sex maniac at 15!

Reviewer: dragontacDate: 2003-08-03
Reviewid: 45217Chapter: 1
lol. harry's a crack pot. hahahaa. "i like paper" lol. the next best thing would have been "i talk to rocks" or "can your eye give me back my sissors?" lol.

Reviewer: BrandyDate: 2003-08-01
Reviewid: 44938Chapter: 1
This story is HILARIOUS!

Reviewer: Accio_SnapeDate: 2003-07-21
Reviewid: 43239Chapter: 1
My face hurts from one point I was laughing too hard to breathe. That was freakin' hilarious.

Reviewer: ziskDate: 2003-07-16
Reviewid: 42365Chapter: 1
*sigh* You're story got me booted from the library because I was laughing so much . ..

What you did with Ginny is just hilarious, especially now that OOtp is out :)

Reviewer: RoseDate: 2003-07-16
Reviewid: 42344Chapter: 1
Goodness, this is funny! I just about wet my pants when Ginny declared her love of paper. Absolutely priceless.

Reviewer: Madame LupinDate: 2003-07-14
Reviewid: 41888Chapter: 1
LOL! That was too funny.

Ginny: [giggles, blushes] I like paper

haha, noyce. I certainly hope you are ashamed of yourself for putting those poor characters through that ;)

After OotP, I needed a humorous fic. Thanks!

Reviewer: DidiDate: 2003-07-14
Reviewid: 41886Chapter: 1
That was FUNNY! "I like paper" THAT was AWESOME! Really funny!

Reviewer: Anna MDate: 2003-07-13
Reviewid: 41719Chapter: 1
This is, always has been, and always will be one of my favourite Harry Potter fics. Ever. I love it! Wonderful!

Reviewer: lineDate: 2003-07-09
Reviewid: 40999Chapter: 1
odd... really odd...

great idea

and it was really funny...
but odd....
and unusual

Reviewer: daveDate: 2003-07-07
Reviewid: 40512Chapter: 1
this is wierd but i gotta ask who is B?

Reviewer: JulesDate: 2003-07-04
Reviewid: 40094Chapter: 1
LMAO... I was just thrown into your story by a friend, who threatened me unless I read it. I'm so glad I did; I haven't laughed so much in donkeys. XD

Absoloutely hysterical though; I loved the Ron/Lavender bit especially. And Ginny blushing/giggling/blushing/giggling.. absoloutely hysterical.

Love it!! *hands over a crate of cookies, and apologises for her incoherency*

-Jules. xxx

Reviewer: ClareDate: 2003-06-28
Reviewid: 38774Chapter: 1
This story was hilarious. I love it!!!

Reviewer: KaeDate: 2003-06-13
Reviewid: 36536Chapter: 1
That was so funny.

Reviewer: julianDate: 2003-06-08
Reviewid: 35923Chapter: 1
it was sweet!very sweet infact but i wish harry and hermione will be very close!

Reviewer: irisDate: 2003-06-07
Reviewid: 35808Chapter: 1
very funny, a bit weird, but hey we all have weird moments...yeah...

Reviewer: Newbia the ElfDate: 2003-05-21
Reviewid: 32985Chapter: 1
LOL!This is hilarious.

Reviewer: ElaineDate: 2003-05-07
Reviewid: 31092Chapter: 1
I love it! You're so creative!!

Reviewer: L. MorningstarDate: 2003-05-05
Reviewid: 30828Chapter: 1
*dies laughing* This is -far- too funny. Harry with all the KBTT is so hilarious. I love how you captured all the horrid cliches in the Harry Potter fanfiction world, from PerfectHair!/Slut!Hermione, to Touchy!Harry, to UselessEvil!Ron. . . all that. It's fantastic.

Your cameo (or, Appearance Halfway Through) was very amusing, too. ‹

Reviewer: AquillaDate: 2003-04-17
Reviewid: 28291Chapter: 1
Laughed so hard I almost wet myself.

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