|
| Dumbledore's
Army |
|
|
|
Review(s): 9
| Reviewer: dogstar | Date: 2007-10-10 |
| Reviewid: 149569 | Chapter: 1 |
| This is an excellent short story - I love the way it's structured, conveying the sweep of years through Molly's focus on her precious daughter. I don't know what it says about me that when I first read this (so long ago now!) what immediately struck home was what's missing - Molly's other children, especially Ron, only a year old when Ginny was born. Ginny really is Molly's most vulnerable point (as we saw in DH in spades), and there is something unsettling about that for me ... hmm, anyway ... for me, this story isn't purely sweet and syrupy. It makes me think sad thoughts and that's what makes it a success in my eyes and I trust you won't mind me saying this because I *know* you have a Dark Side! *cackles and applauds* |
| Report possible abuse to a moderator |
| Reviewer: KateHC2 | Date: 2007-10-01 |
| Reviewid: 149468 | Chapter: 1 |
Just lovely. I especially liked the closure, repeating- "She kisses the baby's sweet lips, and tickles her under her chin; she lays her hand on the child's tiny cheek. The baby turns her head and nuzzles insistently at Molly's palm. It's time to eat. " |
| Report possible abuse to a moderator |
| Reviewer: Songbird | Date: 2007-10-01 |
| Reviewid: 149465 | Chapter: 1 |
Oh, what a trip down memory lane! :D I remember how much I loved this when you first wrote it, it sealed the deal for you as a awesome Queen for me! This is such a lovely piece because it makes it so *obvious* what the Power The Dark Lord Has Not is, and how strong and mind-blowing that power is.
There's something wonky with your formatting though- I see these weird squiggly Os for apostrophes- you might want to fix that. Still, a lovely, lovely story, oh awesome one! |
| Report possible abuse to a moderator |
| Reviewer: Silver Phoenix | Date: 2007-10-01 |
| Reviewid: 149457 | Chapter: 1 |
This was beautiful. Very well done. It reminded me a bit of that Robert Munsch book "I Love You Forever". I was hoping there would be another little snippet between Ginny's coming of age and the Battle of Hogwarts, but it was still very well-crafted. One thing you might want to fix - the apostrophes seem to have been turned into wonky little symbols.
But more importantly, congratulations on a beautiful short story. |
| Report possible abuse to a moderator |
| Reviewer: Verin | Date: 2007-10-01 |
| Reviewid: 149454 | Chapter: 1 |
This is beautiful, and I loved how you wrote all the scenes.
Consider adding scenes of Ginny the somewhat bratty teenager. In my mind, it deepens the mother-daughter relationship by showing how it grows and develops: Oh Mummy, I'm not too young! That is so not fair! You're not going to let me in the final battle, when everyone I love is fighting? ...and then...Whoa! Bellatrix?!? Mum, you ROCK! Well, yes, Ginny dear, I guess I do rock. And you're right, I guess I will accept you've grown up now. Mostly. |
| Report possible abuse to a moderator |
|
|