The Sugar Quill
Sugar Quill Community
- S.P.E.W (SQ History)

Fan Fiction and Writing
- Ask Madam Pince
(Story Submissions)
- Floo Network (Links)

Forums

Administrative Links

Dumbledore's Army
Reviews for: Battle Scars
Review(s): 20

Reviewer: rhoswenbudDate: 2008-05-11
Reviewid: 150843Chapter: 1
That was really sweet... I, like most of your other reviewers just loved the interaction between George and Bill. It seemed so natural and so right, it made me really feel for them both, and made me think about how they were all going to cope after the war, and after Fred's tragic death...
I loved the way that though we don't really see much of Bill's brotherly character in canon, you seem to have captured a personality that is believable and wonderfully touching.
I too loved the line about Harry :
“I can’t ask Harry,” said George, shaking his head sadly. “That kid feels responsible for everyone and everything. I swear, if you farted next to him, he’d say ‘pardon me’.”
Although I did find it funny, I also thought it was quite sad, I mean, George really understands Harry, and the burden he carries. He sees the way that all the way through his life, Harry has had to apologise for existing, and now, since discovering he was a wizard, and most especially since the beginning of the war, he is/feels personally responsible for people's deaths. He understands that they are fighting for him, and in that short line in your story, we are lucky enough to have a glimpse of his desperate feeling of responsibility. And what's more, we see it through George, who has just lost an ear for him.

I thought it was poignant and very accurate. Thanks for writing, this was wonderful, and really tugged at the heartstrings,

x rhoswen

Reviewer: RiadhriDate: 2008-03-31
Reviewid: 150704Chapter: 1
You know what I just realized. My Grandpa calls me and my cousin Fred and George when we visit. That just made me really sad remembering that Fred dies.
~Riadhri

Reviewer: RiadhriDate: 2008-03-31
Reviewid: 150703Chapter: 1
Oh That's way cute. I love the Celestina Warbeck jab. It was hilarious.
~Riadhri

Reviewer: silverfeatherDate: 2008-01-26
Reviewid: 150467Chapter: 1
Aaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwww!! That was really sweet. I felt really bad when Fred (or George, sorry can't remember) died. I kept wishing that he stayed alive. This was a good story by the way.

Reviewer: imeldaDate: 2008-01-11
Reviewid: 150384Chapter: 1
That was so lovely, especially in its simplicity. The way you have them dealing with their own "disfigurements" is really moving, and an aspect not many of us think of. What I love most is the way you subtly make us ache for Fred's death. You never approach the maudlin--never talk about Fred's future or his kids or his own romance. It's very much about George. But when Fred advises George to wait until after the war, when he talks about George's future family...it reinforces the fact that only George can have such a future. Like I said, you avoid the maudlin, you make us ache for Fred in a subtle way.

I just loved it. And the Bill-George interaction was so natural.

Reviewer: Vega BlackDate: 2008-01-11
Reviewid: 150378Chapter: 1
The family interactions are very sweet and real. This reminded me of when my sisters and I would visit my parents at Christmas and would sit and whisper til 3 AM in the kitchen. because someone was asleep on the couch. This would go on till my Dad came down to check on the sounds -- same scolding and everything.

I love stories with real and recognizable family interactions. Bill is such an older brother. You hit the right tone for him to take with Fred and George. You gave the twins nice differentiated personalities. They sometimes are too interchangeable. Molly was right out of the books.

I liked your dialogue which sounded unforced and natural. I'm trying to grasp how that is done, so thanks.

I liked how you dealt with the issues around disfigurement. The Weasleys have two sons with battle scars. They lost a lot in the war. Poor Fred and George.

Reviewer: Gred And FeorgeDate: 2007-11-27
Reviewid: 150024Chapter: 1
Bill crouched down in front of the armchair and took George’s face in his hands. He turned him so that the light from the fire hit the side where George had lost his ear. “Mum did a good job,” he said, appraisingly.

George shrugged. “I guess so,” he said. “There wasn’t much she could do for it.”

I'm not sure why but this made me cry. It is so very beautiful because I love all the Wealeys so very much that I feel like one of them sometimes.

Reviewer: whizbeeDate: 2007-11-15
Reviewid: 149935Chapter: 1
I should have reviewed earlier, but I just read it again--I really love this story. It's so realistic and sweet. And I know I should probably talk about how Fred's comment about being godfather to the sproglets is bittersweet and whatnot but honestly, it was this line that absolutely killed me: "I swear, if you farted next to him, he’d say ‘pardon me’." That is too funny, and spot on.

Reviewer: Gred And FeorgeDate: 2007-11-13
Reviewid: 149911Chapter: 1
You really know how to twist the knife, don't you? My family who where in the house had no idea why I was sobbing and on my way to using a whole box of tissues. I almost had to lock myself in the bathroom like I did when I read the 7th book when Fred died :( I didn't think it could get any worse until I read the one I think is called "Worth Fighting For." (I'm not really sure but you know I mean and I'm too lazy to check) When I read that storie I really did lose it...It's all just too painfull!!!!!!!

Well I really did like the storie; it was beautifully writen and the interaction between the brothers was very good. I like seeing Fred, George, and Bill as men who find love, are a family, fight the war, and are still afraid of there mother. Amazing! Please write more post-war stories...maby about Ron and Hermoine or George (I feels odd saying George without saying "Fred and" before it) and his life or Ginny and Harry? I don't really know-your the amazing one,I'm just the one who reads the stuff and says "wow" Thank you, I really needed that good fanfic witch might as well have been in the book...Wow

Reviewer: stnky605Date: 2007-11-12
Reviewid: 149906Chapter: 1
Nice story. Great interaction between the Weasleys.

Ending is a bit bittersweet, given what happens.

Reviewer: Gred And FeorgeDate: 2007-11-12
Reviewid: 149892Chapter: 1
That is to sad!!! It brought tears to my eyes...Why did Fred have to die? I love Fred!!!

Reviewer: Lorelei LynnDate: 2007-11-03
Reviewid: 149810Chapter: 1
I loved the brotherly interactions in this story. But that last line was so sad! Good job.

Reviewer: Violet AzureDate: 2007-10-25
Reviewid: 149720Chapter: 1
[“Brother, you’re twenty-seven years old. Are you telling me that Mum still scares you?” asked George.

“Mum doesn’t scare me,” countered Bill. “She terrifies me.” Both of the brothers chortled quietly.]

Ha! And people say Molly couldn't take down Bellatrix. She's clearly the scariest witch in the entire series. And a Chastity Charm is pretty funny!

Fred's girlfriends are funny--poor Fred! I'm glad you show him living life to the fullest before he dies later in the book (sniff)

[“Oh,” said George, wrinkling his nose, “And here we envied you because you never had to wear hand-me-downs. I forgot about you having to do nappies.” At that moment, Fred rolled over again, knocking his blanket to the floor.]

That was a cute brother bonding moment. And the girls with the twin thing-naughty funniness!

[“Took me ages just to pluck up the courage to look in the mirror.”]

Oh, poor Bill. He really handled the whole Greyback incident well and Fleur just shined throughout the whole thing.

[“You know, Mum’s going to hate it.”

George smiled brightly. “That’s an added bonus.”]

Ha! I love how the Weasley children know just how much grief to give their mother.

[“That kid feels responsible for everyone and everything. I swear, if you farted next to him, he’d say ‘pardon me’.”]

Bwah ha ha ha! I think this one is one for the "favorite quotes" thread. Seriously, that is so funny! Now all I can picture is Harry and Voldemort having a fart-off contest like Terrence and Philip from "South Park"

[I think Mum and Dad actually conceived you two to one of her songs. Which one was it again? Ah yes, “When Two Wands Ignite.”]

That's disturbing and hilarious.

[Next, you can name me godfather to all of the sproglets who will all be named after me, of course: Fred, Fredrika, Freddy, Fredrique, Fredrick, Fredette, Fredigard….”]

OMG- that's so sad. But sweet. I love how you show the twins expressing their love for each other in their own way. And I do hope Fred names one of his children Fredette.

I love this fic. There's something so cozy and comforting about the Weasley brothers talking together like men. I love how there's an equal mix of teasing and seriousness-they sound like a real family.

Reviewer: HelenHDate: 2007-10-24
Reviewid: 149711Chapter: 1
This was so beautiful, heartwarming, funny and, at the right moments and with a light touch, poignant.
My favourite lines:Fred had reached the third step when he muttered, “Last one to the room gets the lumpy bed.” Immediately there was a scuffling on the stairs as they tried to beat each other to Bill’s room.
*snigger* Boys!
Lovely work, Poppy. A very enjoyable fic.
Now, to follow, a long chaptered-fic telling the story of George's romance with Iris post-kicking-Voldie's-arse, and losing Fred, of course, *sniff*. Say you'll write it, do!
Thank you!
Helen x

Reviewer: birdsongDate: 2007-10-24
Reviewid: 149709Chapter: 1
Ah, this was so touching! I can imagine the dialogue among the brothers, complete with the pillow flinging. I think this is exactly how it would have gone. Good job!

Reviewer: citysnidgetDate: 2007-10-23
Reviewid: 149705Chapter: 1
you cruel, cruel person, talking about a future with Fred.

this was really good.

Reviewer: GufaDate: 2007-10-23
Reviewid: 149698Chapter: 1
A really nice bit of sibling interaction. And that last line...so painful.

Reviewer: SongbirdDate: 2007-10-23
Reviewid: 149697Chapter: 1
It's amazing how every twin story you read these days is all light-hearted and awesome and then the last couple of lines make you feel like someone just put your heart in a blender.

Damn you, JKR.

Anyway, this WAS lovely- I particularly enjoyed the interaction between Bill and George, it felt very Weasleyish and right to me. Best line: "Bill watched him pluck at a frayed thread on the armchair. He was strongly reminded of the five-year-old who used to beg to sleep in his bed because ‘Fred had had a nightmare’."

Amazing.

Reviewer: ArnelDate: 2007-10-23
Reviewid: 149695Chapter: 1
I love the ease with which George and Bill are able to converse about difficult topics. It shows how close they are and how much they care about each other. You've done a wonderful job with this story. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Reviewer: B. NonymousDate: 2007-10-23
Reviewid: 149694Chapter: 1
Oh my... both Nonymous twins came down this evening, one telling me that the other was having bad dreams, because the one not speaking was too afraid. Your bit about George telling that Fred was having a nightmare just hit me in the gut and reminded me of that. And "Uncle Fred, spoiling them senseless," was an awful knife to twist at the end.

Great piece!

The Sugar Quill was created by Zsenya and Arabella. For questions, please send us an Owl!

-- Powered by SQ3 : Coded by David : Design by James --