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| Dumbledore's
Army |
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Review(s): 2
| Reviewer: Arnel | Date: 2003-05-17 |
| Reviewid: 32435 | Chapter: 1 |
| I like this story. It's very different from all the other last Halloween fics. Becky's POV is well done and I'm glad someone else received a gift from Lily besides Harry. |
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| Reviewer: Sicily | Date: 2003-02-22 |
| Reviewid: 21517 | Chapter: 1 |
This is really interesting. I like the way you told it, keeping your sentences choppy because it was so stressful. It was kind of unclear to me whether Becky had magic before (sounded like she did) or whether she got that from Lily; it was also unclear how a Muggle family had such a power that got passed on when someone died. The breaking of the window was well-done, but it seemed like something any wizard would do under a great deal of stress. I'm not sure, though... that could be messed up.
More than anything else, this feels like a prologue to another story. I'm left with so many questions at the end. What does Becky do with this power? How does it change her character? What's going to happen to her lifestyle? What will her parents think? Does she accept the power immediately or continue to fight it? Does she need to learn how to work it or does she already have it under control? You could go so many places with this, and I think *that*'s the interesting story here.
Your last sentence was haunting and beautiful, though, and Becky's reactions were excellent throughout. |
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