Official Minutes of the Sugar Quill
Professorsí Second Summit
(Minutes taken by Moey - with some
additions by Zsenya)
American women walked into the pub, in their typical American Muggle clothing. The
other patrons looked on in distaste.
"Tsk, Americans. Can't even be
bothered to wear their robes in public."
"And look at that one on the left. She has something written on her
shirt. Star Wars. What in bloody hell is that?"
The newcomers made their way to the bar. The cute redheaded bartender
immediately left the patron he was attending to come and assist them.
"Hel - lo, ladies. Name's Fred." Each freckle on his face smiled.
"What can I get you?" At that instant another, identical man appeared
at his side.
"Now Fred, don't go boggarting all the
customers." His smile was in every way as charming as his twin's.
"Good evening, lovely ladies. I'm George. My brother and I are the owners
of this fine establishment and we are forever at your service." The
American foursome couldn't help but laugh as Fred and George took a deep, bow
behind the bar.
"Well, said one of the ladies. What do you recommend?"
Fred and George exchanged a sidelong, mischievous grin. "Well, " said the one named Fred, "we have plenty of
drinks to suit your mood."
said Arabella, leaning on the counter, "Do you have anything that catches
"Hmmm," said Fred, happy to be able to give assistance, "the
only thing that might catch fire is this Everclear,
or the Bacardi 151."
"Ooooh! Everclear!" said Arabella
enthusiastically, "What's that?"
"No!" screamed Zsenya, overhearing the conversation, "NO JUNGLE
JUICE. We are OUT of college for heaven's sake."
"Oh, okay," said Arabella slowly, looking at Zsenya in confusion.
Then, addressing Fred again, she said, "What about Peppermint Schnapps?
Will that catch fire?"
"It just might," replied Fred. "But be careful NOT to try to put
it out with your fingers. Be sure to have a mug nearby to extinguish the flame.
How about we start you off on a Butterbeer, and you can look at our menu."
George tapped his wand on the bar and four parchments appeared before them.
"Thanks, that will work," another of the ladies replied.
As George (or was it Fred?) poured the Butterbeers,
Fred began to chat them up. "I'm sorry ladies," he said as he handed
them their drinks, "I don't think we caught your names."
The women looked at one another and one of them started, "Well, I'm Arabella, this is Zsenya, B, and Elanor. We're on a weekend
trip from America."
"Ah, what a fortuitous circumstance for us that you chose our quaint
little town of Hogsmeade," George
"It's a famous town," Zsenya began. "We're always hearing things
about it in the states, so we thought we'd pop over for a weekend."
"We don't have anything like it in the states. We tend to blend in with
the Muggles," Elanor added. "We don't have any separate Wizarding
B was looking around anxiously. "Do you think Moey got our owl in time? I
hope she makes it. She's going to be hot if she thinks we forgot about
her." B was always so thoughtful.
"She'll be here," said Zsenya reassuringly. "She wouldn't want
to miss this. Ooh look, I think I'm going to try this drink. It says, 'The R/H,
passionately red, strong, with definite kick and bite.' That's the one I
want," she said looking up at Fred (or was it George?)
"Make that two!" Arabella chimed in. "That one sounds absolutely
"Two R/H's coming right up," the redheaded
bartender called over to his twin. "Now how about you two?" he asked
directing his attention to B and Elanor.
"I'm thinking that the H/H might be good," said a misguided Elanor.
"What do you think B? Doesn't it sound sweet?"
"That might be your point of view. I'm thinking that it looks rather
dull." B wisely replied. "I'm with Arabella and Zsenya. I'm going R/H
all the way."
George had handed them three R/H's while Elanor was
still deciding. "Let me have a taste," she asked. Taking a sip she
exclaimed, "Wow! That was excellent! Bartender make
me an R/H - and keep 'em coming!" She slapped
her hand on the bar with finality. "Hey what do these letters mean
anyway?" she asked as a twin placed the drink in front of her.
"Long story. Very long story," was his only
After several R/H's a piece (and a few H/G's thrown in as well), the ladies
were becoming more and more toasted. Fred and George seemed to be having a
lovely time with the ladies and many of their regular customers were forced to
go behind the bar to serve themselves. Elanor and
Zsenya were having giggle fits as George and Fred turned their attentions
specifically to them.
love a woman who isn't afraid to express herself with face paint," said
"Teeheeteeheeteehee," giggled Elanor.
Arabella were still wondering about Moey when suddenly three young wizards
entered the bar.
Two were tall with the same flaming red hair and freckles as Fred and George.
The other had a mop of dark hair and emerald green eyes. The dark-haired man
and one of the redheads were all sweaty. The two sweaty ones were holding
broomsticks and wearing Quidditch robes.
called out. "What took you so long? We thought you'd have been around
"Well you know this one and his strategies," the dark-haired one
replied. "I could have caught the Snitch hours ago, but we had to go
according to his plan." He was obviously mocking the redhead.
"Please, you didn't even see the Snitch until the last five minutes of the
game," the redhead retorted. "Don't let all those screaming women
give you an even bigger head!"
"So boys, how about giving us some Butterbeers,"
the other redhead asked. "Our boys here played a spectacular game. And I
did wonders cheering them on."
"Get them yourselves," replied Fred. "Can't you see that we're
busy?" He nodded toward the group of women they were sitting with.
"Aren't you going to introduce us?" Arabella asked the twins. She was
eyeing the dark-haired one. She turned to Zsenya and whispered, "I like
him. Look at his eyes, he's so, so -alive!"
George looked up from his conversation with Zsenya and sounding rather put out
said, "Zsenya, Elanor, Arabella, B, meet our dear brothers Ron (he was
pointing to the sweaty redhead), Bill, and Harry."
Fred added, "Ron and Harry play for the Chudley
Cannons. Bill's teaching over at Hogwarts after an exciting stint in Egypt."
Arabella asked, "Um, I don't know about you Harry but I'd check to see if
you really are a brother to the rest."
"Don't let the hair and lack of skin pigmentation fool you. I'm 100% Weasley,"
Harry smiled as he went to sit next to Arabella. "We're just One Big Happy
Ron added, "Once you're accepted into the Weasley clan, there's no turning
back. Your in for life."
"So another win, eh?" George looked slyly at
"Ah yes," Fred replied winking at George, "I think this calls
for a round of Gred and Forge's!" There were
shouts of, "Woohoo!" from the rest of the
men as the slapped their hands on the bar.
"What's a Gred and Forge?" B asked Bill who
had come to sit next to her.
"Best not to ask, love," he said smiling at her with twinkling eyes.
"Let's just say, it's a bit like the twins. It looks innocent but looks
can be deceiving. By the way, I love your shirt. Star Wars is a favorite Muggle
movie of mine."
They were suddenly distracted by a pop, while at the same moment, Elanor
shouted, "I want a grape!"
"Ehem, hello!" called the newly arrived
figure from near the door.
"Moey!" the ladies shouted.
"What took you so long?" asked Zsenya.
"We've been waiting," said B.
"B was beginning to worry," Arabella threw in.
"Teeheeheeheehee," Elanor added.
"Oh, I can see that," she said sarcastically. Then smiling she surveying the party. "Now don't just sit there
gaping. Introduce me to your handsome friends. And don't forget to get me a
Introductions were repeated and Moey then said, "So what should I have to
"AIGHHGGHGH!" screamed Elanor, who had suddenly stopped giggling. A
dart had flown past her head so closely that the wind rustled her hair.
said B. looking sheepish. "I was aiming for the dartboard," she
explained, pointing at the wall about ten feet in the opposite direction from
where Elanor was standing.
a drink!" said Moey with a sigh. She felt a bit left out.
Sweaty Ron jumped
behind the bar and said, "I was just about to have the 'Alternate Gred and Forge' myself. Should I make
"Sounds like a plan."
"Two alternate G&F's with Butterbeer
chasers coming right up!"
you're from America too? What do you
do?' Ron asked Moey, looking all cute and sweaty.
"I do a lot of freelance writing. Also a little detective work on the
side," she replied, staring at his fabulous freckles.
"Wow, that sounds so interesting," he replied adorably. "I'd
love to hear all about it."
"And I'd love to hear about Quidditch," she was completely taken by
his grin and the beautiful red hair. "It's my favorite sport. I've been
known to play a good game too."
"Well we'll just have to talk Quidditch over dinner." Her heart
skipped a beat at his invitation. "Harry and I need to get cleaned up but
we can meet you all back here."
"Oh don't go to too much trouble on account of us." She really liked
him like this. He could stay unshowered forever.
"Yeah, really it isn't. Plus I clean up pretty good." She decided she
could live with him clean.
He poured the drinks, which to Moey's surprise were flaming. Arabella turned her head and said, "I want one
on his Firebolt and sailed over the counter to make
one for her. He handed a drink to Arabella, who giggled and asked, "Is
this real fire?"
had a chance to answer, Arabella stuck her hand in the bluebell flame that was
shooting out of the glass. "Ouch!" she
screamed, and flung the drink in the air so that the contents showered over the
bar and onto the floor.
an eyebrow and held up his own glass to Moey. "So here's to the start of
what I know will be a beautiful friendship!"
"Cheers!' she replied blushing furiously. She just knew it would be.
Just then, a
loud noise startled everyone in the bar. An unusual group of people appeared in
the doorway. Zsenya screamed and Elanor clapped her hand over her mouth in
surprise. A tall, slender man with tortoiseshell glasses strode over to where
Zsenya was sitting with George. He had a guitar hanging from a strap around his
neck. Random wires were hanging from it and some sort of pedal was dragging
along on the floor behind him. A set of large headphones were looped around his
neck. "You're coming home now! What the hell are you doing? I told you
that you weren't allowed to go to Hogsbarth with
those freaky friends of yours! I was just in the middle of practicing and now
I've lost my train of thought!"
not freaks!" screeched Zsenya, reaching for Elanor's
T-shirt. Another man, who had the glazed expression of one who worked nights
and spent many hours in front of a computer role-playing
was attempting to carry her out of the bar. "No!" screamed Elanor,
pounding his back with her fists, "you're evil! You took away my Microsoft
Word! I'm only coming home if you promise to fix my computer!"
man walked up to Moey and said, "What? You didn't think that I'd notice
that you were gone? Or know where you were headed? You left AOL Instant
Messenger running! For a geographer, you ain't too
bright. You left your stupid Heiny doll behind."
He held up an unattractive piece of merchandise depicting a young girl with
extremely big feet and bell-bottomed jeans. Moey shrugged, and remained seated
next to sweaty Ron. "Honestly," she replied, tossing her head, "It's Hermione, not Heiny.
You are such a Muggle."
asked sweaty Ron, looking suddenly quite frightened. He moved away from Moey a
few inches and looked around frantically. "Where?
said a pleasant girl with blonde curls and a pretty face, "I - I'm so glad
I found you! I've been thinking, and, well, maybe I could join in the party?
at Arabella questioningly, "Is that your girlfriend?" he asked,
quickly set him straight, "No! That's my roommate. I'm single."
She gave him a dazzling smile.
spoke up, "I'm wondering if that Sirius guy that you were telling me about
will turn up later." She was interrupted when a tall, handsome wizard
approached the crowd, "I'm Sirius's brother. Do you want a drink?"
everyone was arguing and talking and Fred and George passed around another
batch of Alternate G&H's. Bill was just about to
lean forward and kiss B when Kablam! - another loud noise startled them all. Even more surprising
was that moments later, an extremely large Muggle vehicle with Kentucky plates drove through
the wall of the bar. "Hey sis!" said a strong, young man, addressing
B, and climbing out of the device, something square clutched in his hands.
"We were supposed to switch cars, remember? Oh! And here's your laptop.
I'm sorry that I've deprived you of it for so long."
"Our bar! Our bar!" moaned the twins, trying to
figure out a way to magically move the vehicle and repair the hole in the wall.
The atmosphere in the bar was suddenly grim. Slyly, Elanor reached into her
pocket and threw something in the middle of the room. It exploded, and within
seconds, everyone was laughing so hard that they thought their sides would
brilliant!" exclaimed Fred, giving Elanor a large hug. "What was
that?" he managed to get out, before he fell on the floor in hysterics.
invention," gasped Elanor, "Giggle Grenade!"
And they all
laughed happily well into the night.