Disclaimer: This story is based on characters
and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including
but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books,
and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark
infringement is intended. The song lyrics are owned by Five for Fighting
and their record company.
Author's Note: This songfic is written to Five for Fighting's
"Superman (It's Not Easy)". Just a short angsty fic I wrote when I was
listening to the song. Enjoy!
It's Not Easy
I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
I’m just out to find
The better part of me
He looked up, blinking in the hot sun and pushed his flaming red hair
away from his face. His forehead was damp from the humid weather, but
he was used to it by now. He had been kneeling near a sick young animal
armed with his wand and various healing potions. He now sat back on
his heels and watched as the creature took flight. It was beautiful.
Golden-red scales glinted in the sun, and he felt an odd sense of desolate
seclusion.
I’m more than a bird...I’m more than a plane
More than some pretty face beside a train
It’s not easy to be me
He stood up slowly, watching the dragon fly farther and farther away.
Flight had always fascinated him. That was one of the reasons he loved
dragons so much. The stunning and dangerous animals were graceful fliers,
and magnificent to watch in motion against the clear blue backdrop of
sky. He had loved to fly once. But now...now he only flew on the rare
occasion that he visited his family. He could have flown and been rich
from it. He could have shown the world just what it means to play Quidditch.
He could have been great, flying through the air...
He hadn't wanted that. And he didn't want it now. He had been legend
in his school. Everyone knew him, admired his talent, he always had
a pretty girlfriend...but for what? Flying? He could do more than fly.
No one was interested in that though. He had dated plenty of times,
but it never lasted. Nothing lasts. You can't fly forever.
Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I’ll never see
The dragon was still visible, barely, in the distance. A tiny splash
of crimson against the horizon. Was that the way he was back then? With
his red hair and scarlet Quidditch robes, he too was nothing more than
a rapidly departing speck, distant from all who stood solidly on the
earth. He crossed his arms, his brown eyes fixed dejectedly on the dragon.
A ghost of a frown tugged on his nearly impassive face. Overwhelming
loneliness crept over him as he stood with his hand over his eyes, shielding
them from the sun. He scolded himself for his depressed spirit. It was
my own choice, he reminded himself, to give up Quidditch and work out
in the middle of nowhere. He felt a fleeting doubt. Maybe he shouldn't
have turned down that offer to play for England...
It may sound absurd...but don’t be naive
Even Heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed...but won’t you concede
Even Heroes have the right to dream
He sighed. He didn't want fame. That was all Quidditch was good for.
But then what did he want?
His mind wandered to his family and he knew. They all had it. He didn't.
His parents had each other. Bill had Fleur, a pretty girl who was quite
talented in charms. Percy had Penny, his perfect match. Fred had Angelina,
George had Katie...two girls that could match their exuberance. Ron
had Hermione, a clever witch whom Ron had finally worked up the nerve
to ask on a date. Even his little sister had her first boyfriend, Ron's
best friend Harry, the famous Boy Who Lived. They all had someone and
they were all happy.
He had no one. And was miserable.
It’s not easy to be me
He pounded his fist against the palm of his other hand in frustration.
He could have had his pick from plenty of girls. But he wanted someone
that was there for him. Not because of his flying talent. Not
because of his popularity. For him. However, just for him there was
no one.
Up, up and away...away from me
It’s all right...You can all sleep sound tonight
I’m not crazy...or anything...
The dragon had reduced to a mere speck, and still he watched. He recalled
the summer after his graduation from school. Everyone expected him to
go play for England, become the next famous name. It came as an utter
shock to everyone when he came here instead. To an area of seclusion
to research his favorite animals. He had been annoyed at their shock.
He had always been good with magical creatures; flying wasn't the only
thing he did well. They had given him strange looks, and he knew they
were silently wondering why he was doing this. He had left quickly.
Packed his bags and left.
I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
Men weren’t meant to ride
With clouds between their knees
He longed to fly again as he watched the speck that was the dragon.
He longed for the wind rushing around him, the exhilaration of the height,
the vast, unconfined space...
He shook himself. No. Flying was for children. It was silly to long
for something like flying. It wasn't meant to be.
I’m only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me
He had to squint to see the dragon at all now. He tried to ignore the
nagging desire for flight. There was nothing up there for him. He wouldn't
be able to find what he was looking for up there. No point in wasting
time in the sky.
His heart and spirit were truly up there, amongst the blue expanse.
He couldn't see that. He didn't know that. And so he stayed with his
feet planted firmly on the solid surface of the earth
It’s not easy to be me.
The dragon disappeared completely from view. Charlie gazed in the direction
it had gone for a moment longer before turning and walking away.