The Sugar Quill
Author: Sammy Weasley  Story: Enchanted Chairs  Chapter: Default
The distribution of this story is for personal use only. Any other form of distribution is prohibited without the consent of the author.

“Will you act your name for once, Sirius

Set in their seventh year, the Marauders have decided that their Defense Against the Dark Arts Class needs a little improving.


“Will you act your name for once, Sirius?” asked James Potter as they slipped quietly down the hall to the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom.

“How can I do that when we are about to act on the wonderful plan we have hatched?” Sirius Black replied with a small grin on his face that the others could not see but knew was there.

“Maybe so that we don’t get caught before we get there, or else the plan will not be hatched and we will all have detention,” came James’s reply as they rounded the last corner.

“Oh Prongs, you worry too much. We made the map for a reason and Moony will always let us know when there is someone coming. Besides, this mission has a good purpose anyway. We need some mixing in the class,” Sirius said in an annoying all-knowing way.

“Well, be happy James. We did make it here without detection; now let’s set to work on charming those chairs,” Remus Lupin spoke for the first time since they had left the Gryffindor common room.

James, Sirius, and Remus were seventh-year Gryffindors at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Remus was a Prefect but that did not stop him from enjoying a night of mischief with his two best friends. There was usually a forth along, but Peter Pettigrew was sick in the infirmary and therefore was not able to help. The plan was simple; they were going to enchant the chairs so that they would only accept one person.

The three of them had taken the class list and split it into three parts. Each had their own name, and coincidently the girl that he was either with, fighting with, or waiting to get with. In fact Remus recalled the conversation in the common room earlier.


‘Moony, why don’t you take Fae so then the two of you can sit together? Then Padfoot can take Aidan, since that is the one class they never sit together in. I will take Lily since she is the only one left of the three Marauder’s women.’

‘Sounds great Prongs, you always have things worked out,’ Sirius replied.

‘Our women?’ Remus asked ‘since when were they called OUR women?’

‘Cause you great prat, the Marauders all need to have the perfect woman to come home to.’


Neither Remus nor Sirius had thought much into who got which woman, the reasons were explainable, and both had forgotten that James and Lily had had a big row a few days ago. Remus had been both glad and scared that he had gotten Fae. She was really nice to him, and good friends with Lily. Plus she had been outraged over the fact that werewolves were allowed so little freedom by the Ministry, when they had discussed them in Defense Against the Dark Arts third year and again about two weeks ago.

Sirius, humming a little tune, started the spell by enchanting all of the chairs to reject people when sat in. This was the easiest way to do it. They would then change the spell so that it would accept only one person. Before they left, James would set the trigger so that it would be activated by Sirius’s voice and specific words. Once he was done, he announced, “Let the fun begin,” standing at the front of the room with his arms flung wide and his trademark smile on his lips.

Slowly, they set to altering the spell that Sirius had set. To make a little conversation, Remus asked Sirius where he was sitting.

“Not in his usual spot that is for sure. I already claimed that,” James said before Sirius had even opened his mouth.

“No, I was thinking in Lily’s usual, right in front of the class. Should unnerve Professor Elvy, especially after all of us go flying around the classroom.”

“Padfoot, you unnerve her by just being in class, or saying hello to her in the hallway,” James said with a laugh and a smile. “What about you Moony, where are you planning to place you and your little love fairy?”

Remus went red in the face. 'I was thinking in the middle,' he replied softly, turning away from his friends.

“On the edge of the middle section, right Moony?” teased Sirius from his spot at the front of the classroom. “With you on the inside of course, so that she can’t fly away from you.”

“Ha, ha, ha, very funny Padfoot,” Remus replied.

“You could always put her between you and Maria Hanson, then she would at least talk to you,” James added, with a small smile curling his lips.

After about half an hour of working the three Marauders found that they had charmed all of the chairs. Tired from all of the work, Sirius accidentally sat in his usual seat, looking relieved that it was done. About a second later Sirius was flying through the air. With wonderful success Sirius had tested the chairs. He landed about a third of the way up the classroom, smack on his butt. It took a few minutes for James and Remus to stop laughing, and for Sirius to stop rubbing his posterior.

“Well, since we know that it works, we should set the trigger and then go get some sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a long day,” James announced.

“Right then, what is my key phrase to get these buggers activated?” Sirius asked, while kicking the nearest chair.

“Should be something that will not alert the rest of the class,” Remus commented as he sat on the floor, not wanting repeat Sirius’s wonderful flight.

“What about something that has to do with Quidditch practice? Since we do have it on Saturday anyway,” James said, leaning against the door, looking a little tired.

“I’ll complain about the time, lets see, how about the fact that it was moved up an hour. Only Fae will know when practice will actually be. And all she will do is think that you are crazy and want to make sure we beat Slytherin again for the seventh year in a row,” Sirius said, still standing where he had landed.

“That is a good idea, so you are complaining that I want a special beater practice at seven o’clock sharp before regular practice at eight when the rest get on to the field, even though our match is a month and a half away,” James replied from his position by the door.

“Sounds like a good plan to me, might even get bonus points from Lily for finally stepping up and ‘whipping’ the Beaters into shape,” Remus added with a small smile.

“All right then, ready with the spell there, Prongs?” Sirius asked.

“Ready when you are, my dear Padfoot,” came the reply from the doorway, even though all they saw was a floating wand. James had pulled on his invisibility cloak so that he could set it from outside. Remus quickly left the room to slip under the cloak as well once James had gotten to the point of the spell that would then let Sirius know to say his line.

Sirius, still standing in the middle of the room, waited and watched as James moved his wand. Not being able to hear James’s words, Sirius waited for Remus to slip out of sight.

“I can’t believe you are calling a Beater practice at seven sharp, that is way too early for me. I need my beauty sleep you know,” Sirius said in a loud voice that filled the room.

After a few more wand waves Sirius heard, “Great, that was perfect. Now just remember what you said and then tomorrow will be great.”


The trio left the classroom, with no one in the castle any the wiser about what had just taken place. Slowly they crept back down the hall, having to stop once for Peeves who was bouncing around the hall before the Fat Lady. After muttering the password, they slipped into the common room, removed the cloak and went to bed, all feeling relieved that the hard part of the mission was over and the fun part was waiting for the following day when the Gryffindorers had Defense in the afternoon.


Lily was walking with Fae as they headed to Defense class the next afternoon. Fae was trying to comfort Lily about the bad Potions class that they had just had, and the rude comments from Severus Snape. Aidan found it funny that Sirius had defended Lily since James was in a small pickle with Tony Smith and hadn’t heard what had been said.

“Don’t worry about it Lil, we know that you are a great Head Girl and next year when we are out of here, Snape won’t come anywhere near you.”

“Besides, Professor Donovan is always favoring the Slytherins, so Sirius just took you’re detention for you. Since you didn’t curse him and Sirius did, in a way,” Aidan.

“I guess your right. Can’t really expect my excuse of a boyfriend to defend me. Since he was with poor Tony, trying valiantly to not let his frustration show and keep the potion from going completely bad,” Lily admitted. Secretly to herself she had felt more sorry for James then she knew she should, but somehow James didn’t know that Tony had caught Peter’s cold and therefore would spoil the potion. She had been happy to see that Tony made a wise decision to go to the infirmary and not up to Defense class.

From behind them, at the other end of the hall, they could hear Sirius and James talking very loudly.

“I don’t care, I want you and Clancy there at seven on the dot. No excuses, Sirius,” James said in a voice of annoyance.

“But I have detention tonight. Do you want the Bludger to be beating me into a bloody pulp since I can’t keep my eyes open?” Sirius whined sounding like a whinny seven-year-old rather then a seventh-year at Hogwarts.

“Once you are in the air you will wake up just fine, Sirius, you always do.”

“I can’t believe you are doing this. I can’t believe you are calling a beater practice at seven, sharp that is way too early for me. I need my beauty sleep you know,” Sirius, said his loudest voice. This should have cued the girls that something was up.

Fae just laughed a little, “Beauty sleep? Since when did Sirius worry about sleep?”

“One never knows with him, that is one of the joys of dating him,” Aidan replied with a smile on her face. Everyone knew that she was just as proud to call Sirius her boyfriend, as Lily was to call James hers.

As the class shuffled into the room, Lily headed up to the front of the class where she always sat. Fae had called out to tease Sirius about the seven o’clock practice and Aidan stayed with her to find out all about the detention.

Lily sat in her usual seat, and about a second later she went flying through the air. Being as light as she was, she went much farther than Sirius had the night before, almost all the way to the back of the classroom. Her scream had alerted the class and James with reflex from Quidditch caught her before she landed.

Sirius, not really wanting to talk about either the practice or the detention, sat in his usual seat right after Lily did. He promptly sailed through the air, heading for the same spot that he had landed in the night before.

“Merlin’s beard, what was that all about Lily?” James asked a slightly shocked Lily, who was still in his arms.

“I don’t know. Probably some stupid stunt to get people injured, done by the Slytherins,” she replied softly, enjoying the feeling of protectiveness that James’s arms gave her.

Aidan, however, was not comforting her poor boyfriend who was silently cursing under his breath. Instead she was laughing so hard that she had to sit down. Unfortunately for her it was the seat intended for Tony, and she was promptly tossed into the air. Fortunately for her, Remus was in the way of her going very far. Knocking into him with the force of a Bludger, causing a domino affect. Fae had been right behind him and was caught up in the blow. All three of them went down. Fae was able to catch herself; being the Seeker she also had good reflexes from Quidditch. The rest of the class was very wary of any seat they tried to sit in. It took a full fifteen minutes to get everyone seated in the correct spot. Professor Elvy didn’t even sit down, knowing that it would probably be hazardous to her health.

While everyone else in the class was picking themselves off the floor and trying another seat, James was comforting Lily, who was very shaken having flown through the classroom. Making a mental note, James told himself to ask Sirius how strong he had done the ejection charm. James had placed Lily in the proper seat and crouched down next to her.

“Are you all right? You didn’t hit anything in the air did you?” James asked worriedly, knowing that she and Sirius had come very close in the air.

“No, I think I am fine. I didn’t hit anything except for you. Which is probably softer then my landing on the floor would have been,” she replied with a small smile on her lips.

After that James proceeded to apologies for the row earlier in the week. Lily forgave him and then asked if he was really calling a Beater practice at seven. “Sirius will probably end up getting hurt. His detention is scrubbing the Great Hall’s floors and tables. With Filch watching over him, it will take most of the night.”

“No I probably will not, I didn’t realize that his detention was earned defending my lovely lady’s honor,” James replied with his winning smile spreading over his lips.

“All right I think everyone has found a seat that likes them. Mr. Potter, would you please find one for yourself. There are three left,” Professor Elvy, said breaking apart the couple.

Standing up James replied, “Certainly, I will seat myself”.

He then proceeded to sit in the chair meant for Tony, and got expelled into Bryher Cameron. Apologizing to both the class for adding to the time that was wasted on trying to find a seat, and to Bryher for nearly sending her onto the floor again, he tried the one on Lily’s left side and got thrown into the wall. He then tried the seat to the right of Lily, looked up at Professor Elvy, and said that he was settled.


After class everyone was very willing to get out. Sirius had continued to disrupt class, but managed to avoid detention. All he had done was fluster Elvy by complimenting her, and doing a little flirting. Aidan added to it, by glaring at Elvy and tried to distract Sirius, which just distracted Elvy even more.

Remus spent the first part of class apologizing to Fae for knocking her over.

“ Remus, I didn’t get hurt, honestly. Will you stop, please? I have had worse on the Quidditch field,” Fae could be heard saying about halfway through class.

Remus changed the subject, and soon realized that he had been a fool for not talking to Fae before. By the end of class he had agreed to help her with Defense and Arithmancy homework.

Lily made full recovery and had enjoyed class by leaning against James and letting him take the few notes that were needed. It felt good to have made up with him.

The three Marauders decided with the exception of the force of ejection, the mission to mix up the class had been a success, and the Marauders’ women were none the wiser as to why it was done.


This is an outtake from A Friendly Visit, when James, Sirius and Remus were discussing some of their pranks. J. K. Rowlings created James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, Lily, Quidditch and Hogwarts. I created Fae, Adrian, Clancy, Tony Smith, Maria Hanson, Professor Donovan and Professor Elvy.


Thanks to Silver Phoenix, who is great in dealing with my little comma problem.

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