A/N: This was written for Phoenix Starsparkle, and is my entry in the
Unredeemed.net Draco ficathon. A warm thank you goes out to my SQ beta, shellebelle.
Why was there never anything to do around this place? He couldn’t invite any
of his friends over now, because his parents were hosting a cocktail party
later, and everyone would be getting ready. His tutor had been given the day
off, so he didn’t have any lessons to occupy his time. Draco’s mother and father
were rushing around the Manor finalizing details, so there was no one to help
him pass the time.
He felt like kicking something out of frustration. Where was a house elf when
you needed one? Off slamming its foot in a door because it had messed up again,
no doubt. Draco’s wandering eyes came to rest on a bag of Bertie Bott’s Every
Flavour Beans. His mom had given them to him when they got home from shopping
for his first year at Hogwarts, saying that they were to tide him over until the
party, which would have loads of sweets. If he caught one the house elves, he
could feed it all the horribly flavoured ones that he had been planning to feed
Draco quite liked this plan, as it gave him something entertaining to do
while he waited for all the guests to arrive. He leapt off the chair he had been
sitting in, dashed across his room, grabbed the bag of beans off the table on
which all his sweets were laying and ran out the door.
His search had been fruitless. So, Draco decided to check one last place
where an elf might be found, in the kitchens.
He opened the door and was immediately hit with a blast of steam. It was HOT!
Draco groaned inwardly, because he would now have to do his hair over again
before his mother would deem him presentable. Through some steam clouds, he was
able to make out the figure of a house elf busily stirring something with a long
He crept up behind it, making as little noise as possible. Standing directly
behind it, he took out his wand, ready to hex it if necessary. The elf continued
stirring whatever glutinous thing was in the bowl in front of it, completely
oblivious to the boy behind him. Draco began to get impatient, and cast the Leg
The house elf let out a little squeal, and toppled off the stool it had
perched itself on in order to see over the counter.
"Master scared Dobby! What would young Master like Dobby to do, sir?"
Draco held up his bag of Every Flavour Beans. "I want to you taste these.
Some of my friends said they’re a bit off, and I want to make sure."
The house elf looked at the writing on the bag, and tried to get up with his
legs still bound together. "Some of those beans will taste off, young master.
Dobby’s told that’s how they are made. Would master like Dobby to pick out the
good tasting ones?"
Draco smirked. "That won’t be necessary. I already know that they’re all
disgusting. I still want you to try them." He opened the bag and took a handful
out, about to give them to the prostrate house elf when he heard a loud crack.
The house elf had disappeared.
How dare he? Any other house elf would have stayed around and obeyed! That
elf was going to get it when he told his father! Draco threw the handful of
beans into the mixture in the bowl in front of him, and hurled the bag across
the room, causing many beans to scatter over the floor.
He was making his way out of the kitchen when another house elf came through
the door. She stopped short when she saw Draco there, and curtsied deeply.
"Blinky did not know young Master Malfoy was here. Master must excuse Blinky.
Blinky has to put the pudding in the oven."
Draco turned and watched her take the bowl he had thrown the Every Flavour
Beans into and pour the mixture into a mould and place it in the oven. If that
house elf tried to blame him, he’d just say that the annoying little elf had
stolen his sweets and he’d had to put the Leg Locker Curse on him to try to stop
him, but the elf was too determined to ruin the party. Now that sounded quite
good, if he did say so himself. With that idea in mind, he set off to make
himself flawless before the guests arrived and the fun really began.
Why did he have to be the one to entertain all the kids his age? Couldn’t
their parents do that? He hated being nice to all the girls. What fun were they?
None of them even had a broomstick!
He began brainstorming, trying to come up with something interesting they
could do, when food started to appear on the dessert table. His eyes immediately
went to the tampered pudding.
"Blech! This tastes awful! It’s like dirt and horseradish!"
"Vomit! I think I’m going to be sick!"
Draco tried his best to look concerned and sympathetic on the outside, while
he was laughing his head off on the inside. He couldn’t believe so many of them
had tried the pudding. Beside him, Pansy was trying to be as lady-like as
possible while spitting her pudding into a napkin.
"One of the house elves made it, so it should have been fine," he tried to
explain. Just then, he saw another girl heading to the table, so he turned and
tried to help Crabbe clean up (Goyle had spit his entire slice onto Crabbe’s
robes). He heard a gasp behind him, and grinned inwardly. It seemed as though
his pretending not to notice her went as planned, and she too had tasted the
A few seconds later, he felt a tap on his shoulder. Turning around, he saw a
blonde-haired girl holding her plate in one hand. "Where on Earth did you get
that recipe?" she asked.
"I didn’t get it anywhere. One of the house elves made it."
"Well, your elf is a genius! I’ve never tasted anything so delicious!" Draco
began to wonder if he had left some decent tasting ones in the bag by mistake,
until she continued. "I especially like the combination of grass and black
pepper." Well, that put his mind at rest. Hang on! Did she just say she
liked that? He was about to ask her, but she had already bounced off, her
pigtails swinging from side to side.
Draco just shook his head. That girl got Loonier every day.