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The Secret Diary of Hermione Granger

~Year Two~

Based on "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

by J.K. Rowling

Disclaimer: Not even a little bit mine. Except for Gwen – who actually belongs to herself.

Thanks to Zsenya, for making me put up this fic,

And to Honeychurch, for helping me to know Gwen better.

 

 

HQoW

July 20

Hello, Guinevere! Have you been having a nice vacation at Miss Vauclain’s?

It’s been marvelous! I think I’ve told the story of the Sorcerer’s Stone a hundred times. Per day.

Soon there will be more stories, I promise you. School can’t start quickly enough for me! I’ve had a very nice rest, I suppose, but enough already. I ran into some people from my old school the other day, Gwen. Susie Raviski- you know- the mean one who used to tease me?

Yes, I remember. You grew her teeth.

Yes. Well I saw her in the park with her whole gang. I was walking down to the bridge, on my way home, when she sort of came out of nowhere with her friends and said, "Where’ve you been all year, Mangy Granger?" Everybody laughed, but for once my feelings weren’t hurt at all. I had my wand in my pocket.

Hermione! You didn’t do magic outside of school?

Just listen. Very calmly, I said, "I’ve been at Hogwarts." Susie didn’t know what that meant, of course. She burst into giggles and said, "Hogwarts! What’s that, where they send all the pigs?" Which set everybody off laughing again, snorting like swine. She held up her hand for them to stop and said, "Anyhow, I heard you’re a witch, some funny witch, and your whole family’s in some kind of cult. My mum’s always said your mum’s a strange one- too nervous."

I had hold of my wand very, very tight, and my mind was screaming all kinds of curses- I could just see Susie growing mushrooms in her ears, or having her nose fall off, or blistering with a body full of boils. But I made myself picture Professor McGonagall, that time when she gave me detention, and I knew I wanted to avoid that at all costs. So I said nothing.

"Cat got your tongue, Granger?" said Susie, "Or did you have to sacrifice it to your cult?"

"Yeah, let’s see your tongue, Granger."

"Open wide and show us those big teeth."

"Come on, Mangy, tell us about your freaky family!"

What horrible little monsters!

Aren’t they, though.

Did you curse them? Say you did!

What, and let that crew get me expelled? Never. I just.... scared them a bit. I took out my wand and pointed it right at Susie’s face. Suddenly, the laughter stopped.

"What’s that?" she said, trying to sound indifferent. But I knew she must be remembering her teeth. "A twig you picked up? Oh, I’m scared."

"Yeah, it’s a twig," I said. "Just a bit of twig, really." And then I did my wrist-flick. Sparks shot out the tip of my wand, and they all jumped back a step.

Are you allowed to do that?

Oh, sparks aren’t anything. Every time I practice my wrist-flick, I get sparks. It shows that a wand’s in good working order- that’s what Mr. Ollivander at the wand shop told me.

Anyway, I shot a few sparks and they jumped. Susie paled, and I had to laugh a little.

"What do you have," said one of her friends, "a sparkler?" Susie looked a bit relieved at that. "Oh, that’s really thick, Hermione, trying to bother us with a stupid sparkler."

"D’you see any matches?" I said. "How am I lighting the sparkler, Susie?" She didn’t have an answer. All of them were backing away, step by slow step. "Better run if you like your teeth the way they are," I said, and flicked my wrist hard. A burst of bright sparks flew up, and they positively bolted! I just stood there laughing—imagine any student at Hogwarts running away from a bunch of little sparks!

I’m glad you got them- but Hermione, now won’t they really think you’re a witch?

Who cares? Nobody would ever believe them. And it was worth it... oh, wasn’t it worth it! I wish Harry and Ron could’ve seen it! Harry and Ron.

How are they?

As if I know. I’ve written them twice each. Harry didn’t write back at all, and I’m rather worried about him as he’s living with those dreadful people. I got one letter back from Ron, and I know about as much about him as I did before. Want me to copy it?

I do.

"Dear Hermione,

Got your letter. You sound busy. What, are you studying? You better not be. I’ve been playing Quidditch and doing chores and stuff. Did you get a letter from Harry yet, because I didn’t. Hope those gits aren’t torturing him. Ginny’s worried- she’s going on about it right now- I think she fancies him. What an idiot.

Everybody here says hello.

Bye,

Ron"

Well really. Doesn’t he have anything to say?

Apparently not.

I just wrote back and told him not to bother Ginny- she can fancy whomever she likes and it’s none of his business. I hope he’s not teasing her. Ginny’s going to be a first year, and I don’t really know her yet, but I probably will. Every other Weasley has been in Gryffindor. Oh, Gryffindor! How will I ever make it all the way to September?

At least Ron sent a Chocolate Frog with that short note of a letter. I told him last time I wrote that my parents won’t let me have any sugar because they’re dentists, so I haven’t had a single sweet all summer. I guess he thinks that’s bad. I think I’m going to go eat it.

‘Bye!

 

HQoW

July 23

Just got an owl back from Ron. Can you believe this:

"Dear Hermione,

Right, that’s it. Still no letter from Harry and so Fred and George are going to help me bust him out. I’d tell you how we’re going to do it, but you’d just have a fit. Don’t worry. I’ll write you when I’ve got him.

See you,

Ron"

And here is the letter I am sending back:

"Dear Ron (and Harry, if you’re there)

I hope everything went all right and that Harry is okay and that you didn’t do anything illegal to get him out, Ron, because that would get Harry into trouble, too. I’ve been really worried, and if Harry is all right, will you please let me know at once, but perhaps it would be better if you used a different owl, because I think another delivery might finish your one off.

I’m very busy with schoolwork, of course, and we’re going to London next Wednesday to buy my new books. Why don’t we meet in Diagon Alley?

Let me know what’s happening as soon as you can.

Love from,

Hermione."

Oh, I hope they’ll write me soon. I hope Harry’s okay! I hope they can come to Diagon Alley. We got our book list from school, and there are several Defense Against the Dark Arts ones. I hope that means that it will be a real class this time because we’ve got an entire year to make up for. All the books are written by Gilderoy Lockhart, whom I’ve never heard of, but he must be really amazing if he knows so much about the Dark Arts.

I got something else from school, too, Gwen. It’s a Certificate of Special Achievement, for my marks last year! Professor McGonagall sent a note along with it saying she’s sorry I didn’t get it earlier, but it had to be signed at the Ministry of Magic—by the head of the Department of Witching and Wizarding Education, and the Minister of Magic himself, Cornelius Fudge! Mum and Dad had it framed. They are really the best!

That’s wonderful.

Thanks. It’s something to live up to though, isn’t it! I can’t wait to get my schoolbooks and start studying. I really need to prepare!

Speaking of your books, when you’re in Diagon Alley, you should come and visit me at Miss Vauclain’s!

I can do that?

Yes- there’s a large book of blank parchment at the counter in back- you can just write, "Hi, Gwen," and someone will come fetch me.

Really? Do I need my password?

No, no, anybody can write in that book. Will you come?

Of course! That’s so fascinating! Oh, so many reasons to be excited- my books, Diagon Alley, visiting you, and I hope seeing Harry and Ron! I’ll bet time goes really, really slowly until next Wednesday. It always does when I have anything fun to anticipate.

Oh, there’s Mum calling. It’s lunch. See you!

 

HQoW

July 26

Harry’s okay, and they’re all going to meet me in Diagon Alley. Here’s how I know:

"Dear Hermione,

See, I knew you’d throw a fit and you don’t even know what we’ve done. And you’re not going to know either. We’ve got Harry, so quit harping. Quit studying too- how can you be- we’re on vacation! Seriously.

Mum says we can all go to Diagon Alley on Wednesday. How about we meet at Gringotts, since we all have to go there first anyway?

See you there,

Ron"

"Dear Hermione,

Sorry I couldn’t send you any letters. My uncle wouldn’t let me let Hedwig out of her cage all summer. If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t get any of your letters either, because a house-elf named Dobby was stopping my mail. It was a bad summer, and I’m really glad to be staying at Ron’s now, because it’s much better than my house. Hope your summer was great.

See you next week,

Harry"

A house-elf named Dobby was stopping his mail. You know, Gwen, that sort of thing just doesn’t surprise me anymore. After a year at Hogwarts, the fact that there’s something called a house-elf, and it goes ‘round stopping people’s mail, just sounds like a perfectly normal part of life.

In any case, I’m glad Harry’s with Ron, although I don’t like the sound of whatever they did to get him out. And the way Ron talks about studying, you’d think it’s some kind of ancient torture. I’m sure the only reason those two are even excited to go to Diagon Alley is to get ice cream at Fortescue’s.

Oh, and you don’t like Fortescue’s?

That’s not what I—oh, never mind, Gwen. I’ll see you at Miss Vauclain’s on Wednesday, okay? I’ll pop in before we go over to Gringotts.

I can’t wait!

* * *

{ACTUAL EXCERPTS FROM THE DIARY HEADQUARTERS AT THE ENCHANTED STATIONERS IN DIAGON ALLEY, LONDON, JULY 29^th}

 

Hello, it’s Hermione Granger. Is Gwen in there, please?

Allo! Hermione, we ‘av ‘eard so much of you! Iz it all true, what Guinevere ‘az told us about ze Sorcerer’s Stone?

Er- yes. Are you a diary?

Mais oui, ma cherie, I am Marguerite! It iz so nice to meet with you, but I suppose you are wanting to speak wiz Gwen?

Could you find her?

For you? But of course! You are famous here wiz us, you know. We just adore your stories! Un moment, s’il tu plait, and I will ‘av your Gwen.

Thanks!

Did I hear someone say Hermione?

Yes, I’m Hermione.

Hanini! How good you are. You must know how we die for Quidditch- Guinevere has told you?

She certainly has. More than once.

Well, if she’s bad, I’m worse. You will keep us informed of the Quidditch this term, won’t you?

I promise.

You are a peach, hanini, do you know that?

Excuse me, Cassie—HERMIONE!!!!!

Gwen! Who was that? What’s a ‘hanini’?

That was Cassiopeia- she’s Maltese- ‘hanini’ is her way of calling you dear, dear.

That’s so nice! How interesting to meet all your friends, Gwen. They all seem to know me.

Yes, they think you’re just splendid for keeping us entertained all summer, and everybody’s just dying to say hello. Here’s Esmeralda, my friend I’ve told you of!

Oh, good.

Sweet girl! How wonderful to finally meet you after all the raving I’ve heard from Guinevere. She speaks so highly of you- I hear that you’re top of your class?

Oh, it’s nothing. Yes, I am.

And you’re here to get your schoolbooks, I imagine? How lovely to be going to school!

I agree! I just can’t wait to go over and get all my new school things- there’s nothing I like better than all new notebooks and quills and books and folders—

Is this the Miss Granger who tells such tales of sport and alchemy?

Well! I’m Hermione Granger, if that’s what you mean.

Welcome a thousand times, Miss Granger. I am Argo, and I would like to affirm that we, all of us, are in your eternal debt. You weave your world around us, and it is the warming tapestry that comforts our cold hours.

Um...... okay.

My heartfelt and humble thanks to you, as you journey forth in life. Perhaps you will share your thoughts with us another time, though I would never presume to ask such a favor. Farewell, fair witch.

What?

Don’t mind Argo, Hermione. He’s over-dramatic and mildly depressed.

Okay. Gwen, this is so much fun and everything, and I hate to go, but I did promise to meet Harry and Ron at noon, and it’s ten ‘til. I’ve got to run over to Gringotts.

Well I’m just so glad you made it. They’ll be talking about you all week. Run along to your friends, and let me know how things turn out!

I will! Goodbye, Gwen--- Goodbye, everyone!

 

HQoW

August 1

Sorry I didn’t write right away, Gwen, but ever since we got my books, I’ve been-

Studying? Somehow I thought you might be.

Yes, well there’s so much to read- we’ve got seven Defense Against the Dark Arts books, and they’re all written by Gilderoy Lockhart, and we even met him at Flourish and Blotts, and he’s going to be our teacher at Hogwarts, and Gwen, he looks like he should be a film star, I mean, honestly, I’ve never seen anybody up close who looked like that, and I’m going to be looking at him all year long, so how will I ever stand it!? I have to memorize every word of his books.

All seven?

I know, it’s hard, but I think I can do it for Professor Lockhart.

I see. And how are Ron and Harry?

They’re fine. Look, in "Gadding with Ghouls" Professor Lockhart says he managed to rid a haunted castle of a poltergeist that had been plaguing it for over a thousand years! It’s about time we had a real Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher—I bet he’ll get rid of Peeves if we tell him to—d’you suppose I ought to wear my lavender sweater on the first day of his class? In "A Year with the Yeti" he says his favorite color is lilac, but I haven’t got anything really lilac.

I imagine your school robe will cover it up in any case.

No, not entirely, it fastens in front but nips open at the top and then parts under the clasp.

Well then, by all means, wear the lavender.

Yes, I think I will. We haven’t gone shopping for my school clothes yet, except my robes of course, so maybe Mum will let me get something lilac. I got some purple ink and a new quill for that class already. I’d wish it were September, but I need every minute left in this vacation to commit these textbooks to memory.

And your other classes?

Oh. Well, there’s second year level of everything I was taking before, plus an extra class in place of Flying, which you don’t have to take after first year. My new class is called Elementary Spellish, which is the study of Wizarding terminology, you know, Latin derivatives and magical dialects and witching slang. Isn’t that fascinating? It’s only twice a week—Professor McGonagall wants me to ease in to extra work, to make sure I can really handle it before I try to add any more. I’m sure I’ll be fine—my marks last year are proof of that!

I have to tell you, Gwen, it was so nice to be in the wizarding world again. I feel like I’m starving for magic. Diagon Alley was just wonderful, and getting to say hello to you at your headquarters was such a treat. How are all your friends?

They’re just fine. We all enjoyed it, too. But aren’t you going to tell me about your friends, Hermione dear?

Yes, but I have to do it later. I already feel really guilty about writing for this long when I haven’t even touched "Break With A Banshee" and I’ve only barely skimmed "Travels With Trolls". Lockhart is clearly serious about our education, and I mean to rise to the occasion. Talk to you soon.

 

HQoW

August 12

Well, I’ve done it. I’ve read them all. My head feels heavy. Gwen—Gilderoy Lockhart has done so much. Why on earth is he stopping such an unbelievable career to come teach us at Hogwarts?

Unbelievable, yes, that’s true.

So many people will suffer without his help. But I am glad he’ll be helping us, instead. Is that awful?

No, it’s normal.

I still haven’t told you about Diagon Alley, have I? Now that I’ve finished all Lockhart’s books, all I can think about is how nice it was to see everyone again. I didn’t realize how much it would feel like a family reunion, what with Harry and Ron and Percy, Fred and George, my parents, Ron’s parents, his little sister Ginny, and even Hagrid! We were all in a bunch on the top of the steps at Gringotts, finally back together, and I just wanted to smile ‘til my head fell off.

Ron’s dad was really fascinated with my Muggle mum and dad, and he towed them off to buy them a drink so he could quiz them about what our life is like. They’re still talking about it. That was their first chance to really sit down and talk with an adult from the wizarding world, and they thought Mr. Weasley was just as fascinating as he thought they were.

Harry bought Ron and me ice creams at Fortescue’s, and then we window shopped for all the things we want to buy when we’re rich. Ron wants a racing broom, newest model, Nimbus 2001. Harry wants exactly the same thing. They’re so original. I saw a set of scales I’d die for- it’s called a Prioritizer. You write two tasks on slips of paper and place them in the scales, and it tells you which is truly the most important to do first. I need that thing. It would really help me to schedule properly during exams. But it was far too expensive to even think about.

After that, we met up with my parents and all the Weasleys at Flourish and Blotts to get our books—which is where we met Professor Lockhart. I’ve never seen robes like his, they were so blue, and they matched his eyes exactly, and he has blond, wavy hair, and the most perfect teeth I have ever seen. I wish I had teeth like that. He’s won Witch Weekly’s Most-Charming-Smile Award five times! He was doing a book signing, and when he saw Harry, he grabbed him up to the front and presented him with a complimentary stack of all the textbooks! The news people were all taking pictures- I mean, Gilderoy Lockhart and Harry Potter, that’s a double celebrity. Harry didn’t look too pleased- I saw him dump all his books over in Ginny Weasley’s cauldron. (Really, Gwen, I thought it was really sweet of Professor Lockhart to give Harry all those books. But I guess it was also nice of Harry to give the books to Ginny, since Mrs. Weasley has to buy five sets.)

That’s when everything started to go downhill, though, because Malfoy came over to us. If there is one thing I didn’t miss about the magical world, it’s Malfoy. He hasn’t made any improvements over the summer. If anything, he’s worse. Started taunting Harry right off about all the press attention he’d gotten with Professor Lockhart, gibing at him with "Famous Harry Potter" and all that.

Ginny Weasley jumped right to Harry’s defense—Ron and I would have done it, but we were fighting our way over to him through the crowd. I watched her, and she looked livid, which was interesting considering she didn’t say one word or draw one speck of attention toward herself the whole day. But she had no trouble standing up to Malfoy! "Leave him alone, he didn’t want all that," she said. I was impressed. Malfoy was not. "Potter, you’ve got yourself a girlfriend," he said, as if a girlfriend were the most absolutely revolting thing he could think of. Ha. He should be so lucky. I noticed that Ginny turned really red when he said it, though, so I think Ron might be right—she does like Harry. It’s her business, of course, but I definitely hope she’s in Gryffindor so I can find a way to ask her. Anybody who can’t stand Malfoy is all right by me.

Malfoy. He said to Ron, "Surprised to see you in a shop, Weasley. I suppose your parents will go hungry for a month to pay for all those." Harry and I both had to grab Ron by the back of the jacket to hold him off, because Mr. Weasley was coming over with my parents, and I didn’t need them to see us fighting! If they hadn’t been coming over, though, I might have let Ron at him. Malfoy deserves.... but I don’t approve of violence. Anyway, my parents got an eye full of fighting a moment later.

Mr. Malfoy came up to us. He’s just as nasty as his son, and treats Mr. Weasley in the same way that Draco treats Ron. He was getting down on him for being poor, and grabbed up one of the second-hand books Mr. Weasley was buying for Ginny and started to make fun of it. Beastly.

Then Mr. Malfoy looked over at my parents, and at me, and I mean, he looked at us like we were just the filthiest trash you’ve ever seen. Nobody’s ever looked at me like that, not even Susie—not even Snape. He sneered and said, "The company you keep, Weasley.... and I thought your family could sink no lower"—which is when Mr. Weasley knocked him into a bookshelf. They brawled so hard I thought they’d destroy the store- our whole section was demolished- Mrs. Weasley was hollering at her husband to stop it- Ron and all the boys were cheering him on- my parents looked petrified- and THANKFULLY Hagrid came in and pulled them off one another. It all ended with Mr. Malfoy tossing Ginny’s book back in her cauldron and saying, "It’s the best your father can give you."

Ron says Mr. Malfoy hates his dad because Mr. Weasley is the head of the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts office, and so he’s always after Mr. Malfoy for having illegally enchanted possessions. Malfoy thinks since he’s rich, he should be allowed to have whatever he likes, and he resents Mr. Weasley for trying to tell him otherwise.

But I wonder why Mr. Malfoy has such an obvious grudge against me and my family? We’ve got nothing to do with him. I suppose he’s just all-around horrible—no wonder his son is such an idiot. Honestly, two grown men fighting in a shop—not that I blame Mr. Weasley one bit, but my parents simply don’t know what to make of it, and they keep throwing questions at me. Violence- is it encouraged in wizarding? Is there fighting all over at Hogwarts? Do children put curses on each other? Do teachers use magical punishments? Do I feel quite safe? I told them that there isn’t much fighting, and that if there were any cursing going on, I'd be all right as I’m very well versed in counter-curses. And I told them that teachers certainly do not use magical punishments. I didn’t tell them about the punishments Filch always threatens, because they were terrified enough. Oh, dear. I wonder what they’d do if they knew about the Sorcerer’s Stone?

They don’t know?

Are you kidding me? Trolls, poisons, three-headed dogs and plants that try to choke you? They’d never let me come back to Hogwarts again. But you know, Gwen, I really don’t think the wizarding world is any worse than the Muggle one. Anywhere you go, you can find rotten people who want to pick a fight. Just look at Susie Raviski.

Oh yes, how is dear old Susie?

I wouldn’t know. She won’t come near me. Hah! At least I’ve managed to defeat one of my enemies. Sooner or later, we’ll find a way to shut Malfoy up, too. But fighting is certainly not the answer, so I’m going to have to find some kind of mature alternative. Maybe I could charm myself to be selectively deaf to everything he says.

Ooooh, Charms. I have to go. I still have to get through all my non-Lockhart textbooks. See you later, Gwen.

 

 

HQoW

August 28

I leave for Hogwarts next Tuesday! Mum let me get a lilac colored sweater, and I’m going to wear it to our first Defense Against the Dark Arts class, and I can’t wait to start learning all the techniques he talks about in his books. I hope I learned enough to keep up!

And what are you going to wear to Transfiguration?

Oh, I hadn’t really thought about it. Mmmmm, Gwen, Mum’s just brought me some Brambleberry Tea she bought in Diagon Alley at Mrs. Weasley’s suggestion. It’s heavenly. It’s actually supposed to be self-brewing, and you’re supposed to use a Boiling charm, but it works quite nicely on a regular stove. Mum got all types of things on this trip. She bought the "Big Book of Magical Dentistry"- she wants to see what it’s all about. I keep begging her to let me get my teeth shrunk, but she’s highly skeptical about medicinal magic. She also got a Lister for the kitchen, which tells you the second you run out of something, and she got some jam from the Forbidden Fruit Company—all their products increase your brain capacity, and we’ve been putting it on our toast every morning. I don’t know if Mum’s supposed to eat magic stuff, but as she hasn’t sprouted any extra parts yet, I suppose it’s all right.

I’ve got all my inks and quills and parchment and books..... ahhhhh. I love the smell of new school things. It always makes me so excited, all the fresh pages, the idea of how much I can learn! I just love putting things away in my head. I can never understand people who don’t like school. Also, I’m still getting my magical books of the month from my subscription last Christmas. August is "Spelling From the Heart- Stores of Love Charms Gone Perfectly Right and Desperately Wrong". It’s helping me entertain myself in these last few days before school starts. I’m actually reading right now about a girl who slipped a Devotion Draught to one of her professors! But that’s one that turned out Desperately Wrong, because you can’t use a Devotion Draught until you’re a fully fledged witch, and if you try it before that, it just charms the other person into a heightened awareness of your feelings for them. How embarrassing! But it’s her fault- she mustn’t have read the spell properly and thoroughly. I’ll bet I could find a workable love charm. If I wanted. But I don’t.

Just four days, Gwen. Four days and I’ll be back on the Hogwarts Express and I’ll be able to point my wand and do whatever I like! (within reason.) I’m itching, just itching, to do magic. Summer was far too long.

 

HQoW

September 1

Well I’m miffed. Harry and Ron aren’t on this train. No, I’m not miffed, I’m worried. Why aren’t they on this train? Fred and George are here- I saw Percy- and Ginny’s right next to me writing in her diary. Where is Ron Weasley if all his siblings are here? And where is Harry? They’d better not be doing anything bad.

I think Ginny’s diary is enchanted too, Gwen. She keeps stopping her writing and waiting and nodding, sometimes giggling, just like I do with you.

You giggle?

Sometimes, when you’re funny. There, she just giggled again and murmured something. It has to be enchanted. I want to ask her if she likes Harry, but that’s really none of my business. It’s just that this is such a perfect opportunity, with them not here.... but I’ll hold back. I don’t want to make her nervous. I mean, I hardly know her, so it would be rude.

Don’t ask her, Hermione, think how you would feel.

You’re right. All right.

I cannot believe them! Why on earth aren’t they on this train? Our first day back and I was so looking forward to a good long talk.... I hope they’re okay, wherever they are.

Well why don’t you ask Ginny about that?

Oh, right. Good thinking, Gwen. ‘Bye.

 

HQoW

September 2

It’s not funny. They’re both lucky they haven’t been kicked out of Hogwarts for good, but the way everyone’s behaving, you’d think that coming to school in a flying car and crashing it into a Whomping Willow is some kind of marvelous joke. It’s ridiculous. They said they couldn’t get through the barrier for platform nine and three quarters, but why didn’t they just send an owl? Think about it. You know it’s a bad beginning when the first words I hear from Harry are "Well, we haven’t been expelled," and the first from Ron are, "Skip the lecture."

Fine, I’ll skip the lecture. I won’t mention that you could have been killed, you’ve damaged school property, you could have lost a thousand House Points for Gryffindor, you might’ve ruined your father’s reputation at the Ministry of Magic, and you’ve terrified your little sister not to mention me! Rude, thoughtless, foolish. Percy’s the only one who doesn’t seem to think it’s a cool way to make an entrance, but as he’s a prefect who abides by the rules and gets good marks, Ron and Harry don’t care what he thinks. I wonder if I’ll be made a prefect? I hope so. Then I can give all the lectures I want and nobody can tell me to "skip" anything.

Most of all, though, they missed the First Day Feast and the Sorting. They weren’t there to see Ginny get sorted, and I think she’s a little disappointed. It was adorable- the hat slid all the way down her head, and then gave a little hop and piped "Gryffindor!" and the rest of her brothers cheered her wildly. So did I. She’s a shy girl, but I think I’ll like her- we had a sort of chat on the train and she said she knew who I was because she’d heard about me over the summer, how I’m top of the class and all about the Sorcerer’s Stone and everything. I’m surprised Ron told her about that- but then wizarding families probably aren’t as shocked by that sort of thing as my mum and dad would be.

Didn’t you say she has an enchanted diary?

I think so, yes. I mean, at one point she stared down at the page just reading for five whole minutes, and then gave a little sigh and said "Oh, Tom," and started writing furiously. If it’s not enchanted, then she needs to have her head checked.

Tom?

I think that’s what she said. Oooh, I need sleep. Tomorrow we start class, and I want to be really rested for Defense Against the Dark Arts.

Go on and get your beauty sleep.

‘Night!

 

HQoW

September 3

Hi, Guinevere! I love school!

I got thirty points for Gryffindor in one day- twenty for knowing about Mandrakes in Herbology. They’re used to restore people who’ve been transfigured or cursed, and we were repotting them all morning while wearing earmuffs, because their cries can kill. It was marvelous! Oh, how wonderful to back at Hogwarts with things like Mandrakes to work on! Then we had Transfiguration and we all had to practice turning beetles into buttons, just to get ourselves back in shape. I made a perfect set of coat buttons—good thing I kept up on my studies and practiced my wrist-flick all summer, because everybody else seemed to be having a rough time. Especially Ron, but then that’s his fault, isn’t it? His wand snapped when he flew that car into the Whomping Willow, and a wand won’t work properly if it’s there’s just Spellotape holding it together—oh, and did I mention he got a Howler this morning in the post?

Those are rather embarrassing, aren’t they?

His own fault. His mother lectured him right there in the Great Hall, in the loudest voice I’ve ever heard. She said everything that I wanted to say to him the other day, and for once he and Harry seemed to realize the seriousness of what they’d done. Sometimes you just have to go about it the loud way when you’re dealing with those two-- and anyway I don’t care if Ron was embarrassed because at lunchtime he grabbed my schedule and saw that I’ve drawn decorations all around my Defense Against the Dark Arts classes, and he didn’t care one single second if I was embarrassed. He yelled "Why have you outlined all Lockhart’s lessons in little hearts?" and it was loud enough for the whole Gryffindor table to hear. I noticed Ginny give me a sympathetic glance. I’ll bet she really knows what it’s like to be tortured what with six brothers. Poor girl.

Anyway Gwen, we had Defense Against the Dark Arts this afternoon, and Professor Lockhart was wearing turquoise. He has the nicest dress sense of any wizard I’ve ever seen. He gave us a pop quiz and I got full marks and he said, "Where is Miss Hermione Granger?" I raised my hand and he said I was "Excellent!" and told me to take ten more points to Gryffindor—and I swear I saw him wink at the color of my sweater! All that, and then he let out a cage full of Cornish Pixies for us to try and catch. A real hands-on lesson! They wreaked havoc in the room, but I know Professor Lockhart was just testing our capabilities. Ron and Harry, on the other hand, seem to think he has no idea what he’s doing—they think he’s made up all those things he talks about in his books. But Dumbledore would never let him be our teacher if he didn’t have merit, so I say they’re just jealous because he’s such a clever wizard. I’ve got to go and start the assignment he’s given us- "Compare the conquests of Gilderoy Lockhart to those of Ulysses in a five paragraph essay". That’s going to take far more than five paragraphs, and I mean to do it thoroughly. Talk to you soon!

 

HQoW

September 12

Quidditch will definitely be interesting this term, Gwen.

Oooh, really? Why?

Malfoy is the new Slytherin Seeker. His rich father bought the whole team new Nimbus Two Thousand and Ones, so now he gets to be on the team. They’ve kicked off the rivalry already—Ron and I were down watching Gryffindor practice this morning when the Slytherins came and tried to take over the field so they could show off. Malfoy said something really nasty of course, about our team’s broomsticks being so old they ought to be raffled off to a museum, so I said, "At least no one in Gryffindor had to buy their way in. They got in on pure talent."

Good for you!

Except then Malfoy called me a "filthy little Mudblood."

He did WHAT? Never mind, don’t repeat it. I heard you. How dare he call you that—oh, wouldn’t I like to teach that brat a lesson—

Everybody else reacted that same way, Gwen. There was a general yell, Fred and George Weasley tried to jump him, Ron pulled out his wand and said, "You’ll pay for that one, Malfoy!" and tried to curse him—but you know his wand’s broken. The curse came out the back end and poor Ron got it right in the stomach, a belly full of slugs. He started belching them everywhere and it was really disgusting. The Slytherins were laughing fit to kill. Harry and I took Ron under the arms and pulled him off to Hagrid’s. I tried to remember the counter-curse to stop him being sick, but there isn’t one; you just have to retch up ‘til they’re all out, and oh, Gwen, he shouldn’t have done that for me, I mean, who cares what Malfoy says?

Ron did just what he should have done. I only wish the curse had gone out the right way.

He told me- between slugs- that Mudblood is the foulest name you can call somebody like me, who’s Muggle-born. It means I have common, dirty blood, and Malfoy thinks he’s better because he’s a pure-blood. Now I understand why he and his father were so vicious to my family in Diagon Alley. They’re prejudiced against witches like me.

Lousy, rotten—

No, no, really, it’s okay, Gwen, I don’t care. I’ve got good friends. Ron stood up for me, and he said pure-blood doesn’t mean anything anyway, just look at Neville, he’s pure-blood and he can hardly stand a cauldron the right way up. And Hagrid says, "They haven’t invented the spell our Hermione can’t do." Our Hermione, isn’t that nice? Malfoy can’t bother me when I’ve got such great allies.

Well, if you’re really all right--?

I am. Hagrid’s a dear, if he is a bit mixed-up. Professor Lockhart was leaving his cabin when we got down there, and I get the feeling Hagrid doesn’t like him. He said that if a word Professor Lockhart says is true, he’ll eat his kettle, but it is perfectly obvious to me that he’s as envious as Harry and Ron. Poor Hagrid, he must be a bit jealous, not being allowed to use magic or anything. He was expelled from Hogwarts in his third year. That’s why he’s gamekeeper instead of a wizarding teacher.

Expelled? What for?

We don’t know. He won’t tell us. I think he has his old school wand inside his umbrella though, because the umbrella is over by his pumpkin patch, which is obviously growing under the influence of an Engorgement Charm. But the pumpkins do look nice. They’ll be fantastic at the Halloween Feast and so even if he is breaking rules, I couldn’t help but say that he’d done a good job on them.

He said Ginny Weasley said the same thing the other day- I guess she was down at his cabin hoping to ‘accidentally’ run into Harry.

Oh, that’s darling.

I think so too, but Hagrid and Ron of course had to tease Harry about it. What is wrong with them? It’s sweet to be liked. You’d think Ginny were doing something idiotic, the way they go on. The only thing idiotic is that she likes somebody who’s too stupid to appreciate it.

They’re just stupid in general sometimes. Flying a car into a tree- honestly, I’m glad they’ve got detention tonight. Maybe they’ll think twice the next time they want to act like boys.

 

 

 

 

HQoW

September 13

Well, Gwen, Harry’s finally gone crazy. He is now hearing voices.

Is that so?

Yes. He was doing his detention with Professor Lockhart, helping him answer his fan mail (and may I just say that I don’t think that’s any kind of a punishment? I mean, I’ll do that voluntarily if Professor Lockhart needs an assistant or anything. I should ask him.)

Of course.

So he was in detention when he heard a voice say, "Come.... come to me.... let me rip you.... let me tear you..... let me kill you...." But Professor Lockhart couldn’t hear a thing, and he’s the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher! I think Harry might need to try and get a bit more sleep. Too many early-morning Quidditch practices—he’s confused.

That is strange. Oh, Hermione- before I forget to ask you- is Ginny Weasley still writing in that diary?

All the time, why?

Nothing... yet. I need to ask a few more questions at Miss Vauclain’s about it, that’s all. And you said she called it ‘Tom’?

Yes, I think so.

All right. Just checking into things a bit.

Oh, Gwen, I have to go. I’ve got Elementary Spellish homework, and I want to add a few things to that essay for Transfiguration—and here’s Neville, wanting help with Potions. Oh, Neville.

 

 

 

 

 

 

HQoW

September 21

Hey, Gwen.

I found out about Mudblood. I asked about the history of that term, in Elementary Spellish, and it’s.... awful. It’s like the words we have in the Muggle world that some people use to make fun of people who are of other races and other backgrounds. There are all kinds of ugly names- so ugly that I don’t even want to repeat them- and Mudblood is one of those words. Where I’m from, you have to be a serious bigot to use a word like that. The Malfoys are more hateful than I thought.

You know, it’s only a word, Hermione. Please, please don’t take it to heart.

I don’t. It’s not that, I just.... I never thought that I’d be the subject of that kind of prejudice. It’s a strange feeling, being hated for something you’ve got no control over. That’s all.

Spellish is easy, by the way. If this is what it’s like to have one extra class, then I want three. I can handle anything. Muggle-born or not, I’m top witch in my class, and it’s going to stay that way. I’m going to study.

 

HQoW

October 11

We’ve got our first tests back, and you’ll forgive me for not writing lately when I tell you that I got full marks on all of them, plus house points for my Defense Against the Dark Arts one! And Professor Lockhart wrote a note on the back of my test, which says,

"My dear Miss Granger,

Again you are the only student to correctly answer every question- take ten points to Gryffindor for knowing that my lifelong recurring nightmare is that of being chased down by six hundred Giants, and defeating them with the Impediment Charm! Also, take five points for choosing to use purple ink.

Excellent Work!

Professor Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly’s Most-Charming-Smile Award."

Isn’t that divine? I’m keeping this test forever!

Oh dear. Ginny’s smoking at the ears.

What, is she angry about something?

No, literally, she’s smoking at the ears. Percy’s been trying to make her take some of Madam Pomfrey’s Pepperup potion for her head cold, and I guess she finally drank it because it makes you smoke at the ears. Ginny’s a redhead, so it looks like her head is on fire. Ron’s laughing at her as if he wouldn’t look exactly the same, and poor Ginny’s just trying hide behind a book so Harry won’t be able to see her—no, he doesn’t seem to know what’s happening—oh, she definitely likes him, I can tell.

Oh, can you always tell?

Yes, I’m very observant about that kind of thing. I can always see when somebody.... well, you know, when somebody has a crush. They act like idiots. I’m awfully glad I don’t behave that way over anybody- not that Ginny’s so bad, she’s just painfully shy around Harry so it makes it more obvious.

Hah! Gwen, Ron’s taking out his chess set. He owes me a game, so he’d better not start playing with Harry-- I might have beat him last time if Neville hadn’t misdirected a Flying charm and knocked over all our pieces. Yes, he’s giving me the game face. I have to go, I have to beat him. Bye, Gwen.